A/N: There was some misunderstanding in the last chapter. Mac did not drink
solely because of their argument, it was a build-up of emotional tension.
She had had too much. As Harm concludes the argument was simply "..the last
straw.." I am not the type of person who blames the fault of their
relationship on either party. I believe they are both to blame, as well as
circumstances, and other people's selfishness. I hope you understand what I
meant now. This is yet another sad chapter...::sigh::.
Chapter 14
Sometime
In a car
Somewhere in London
I wake up slowly, still in my drunken state, and look ahead of me to see that Harm is driving the car with me in it.
"HHHHHHHHhhhhaarrmmmmm.. where are we??" I ask in my slurred speech.
"In London."
"Knew that. Tell me where we are."
"We're going to get you some coffee."
I laugh, "don't need c-coffee."
"Yes, you do, you're drunk."
"No-am not drunk." I stutter
"Look, Mac, you gotta trust me."
"Can't."
If he hadn't been driving the car, I think he'd have fallen over in shock. "Why can't you trust me Mac?" he asked, and even though I was drunk, I could feel, and can still feel the intense pain in his voice.
I refuse to answer; doing so will only bring up a subject I'd rather ignore. I looked out the window and watch the scenery fly by, hoping he will not pursue his question further.
(Harm's POV)
She can't trust me. She can't trust me. She can't trust me. Why not? Can our relationship have deteriorated so much she cannot even trust me anymore? Why did she get so mad in the café? Why did she go drink? She hasn't drunk since Dalton's death. What is going on? Why won't she tell me? A thousand such thoughts are running through my head as I drive through London looking for the nearest coffee shop. She didn't answer my question either, that doesn't bode well.
I have an idea as to why she got drunk. It's probably because of our argument. But then again, maybe it's something else she's not telling me. Mac is the type of person who holds things inside of her until she can't take it anymore. Maybe it's a build-up of stress, and our argument was the final straw. I wish she would tell me what's wrong-but she said she doesn't trust me anymore. There must have been a time when she trusted me, there had to have been, otherwise we would never have been such great friends. Does she not trust me because I couldn't stop her from drinking? I take a quick glance at her in the back seat. She looks upset, deeply, and hurt too. She may be drunk, and her senses impaired, but her emotions and feelings are as sharp as ever. Her eyes meet mine, they speak of pain and suffering so great it breaks my heart. I look away quickly, it's too much to see her hurting like that, and to know that I'm the cause of her hurt, and I don't know how to fix it. I silently begin to cry.. What have I done to you Sarah????
A/N: Remember what I said, this is not all Harm's fault. He just has a tendency to blame himself for things. He faults himself for not being able to save his father, and honestly, what can a six-year old do to save a father halfway across the world in hostile territory? Not much. Harm has always blamed himself for things that go wrong in his life. It's a carry- over of emotional scars from childhood. Mac has her own share of problems too. Only hers are somewhat different. This is why they need each other; they can't do it on their own, see why DPB needs to get them together now???
Chapter 14
Sometime
In a car
Somewhere in London
I wake up slowly, still in my drunken state, and look ahead of me to see that Harm is driving the car with me in it.
"HHHHHHHHhhhhaarrmmmmm.. where are we??" I ask in my slurred speech.
"In London."
"Knew that. Tell me where we are."
"We're going to get you some coffee."
I laugh, "don't need c-coffee."
"Yes, you do, you're drunk."
"No-am not drunk." I stutter
"Look, Mac, you gotta trust me."
"Can't."
If he hadn't been driving the car, I think he'd have fallen over in shock. "Why can't you trust me Mac?" he asked, and even though I was drunk, I could feel, and can still feel the intense pain in his voice.
I refuse to answer; doing so will only bring up a subject I'd rather ignore. I looked out the window and watch the scenery fly by, hoping he will not pursue his question further.
(Harm's POV)
She can't trust me. She can't trust me. She can't trust me. Why not? Can our relationship have deteriorated so much she cannot even trust me anymore? Why did she get so mad in the café? Why did she go drink? She hasn't drunk since Dalton's death. What is going on? Why won't she tell me? A thousand such thoughts are running through my head as I drive through London looking for the nearest coffee shop. She didn't answer my question either, that doesn't bode well.
I have an idea as to why she got drunk. It's probably because of our argument. But then again, maybe it's something else she's not telling me. Mac is the type of person who holds things inside of her until she can't take it anymore. Maybe it's a build-up of stress, and our argument was the final straw. I wish she would tell me what's wrong-but she said she doesn't trust me anymore. There must have been a time when she trusted me, there had to have been, otherwise we would never have been such great friends. Does she not trust me because I couldn't stop her from drinking? I take a quick glance at her in the back seat. She looks upset, deeply, and hurt too. She may be drunk, and her senses impaired, but her emotions and feelings are as sharp as ever. Her eyes meet mine, they speak of pain and suffering so great it breaks my heart. I look away quickly, it's too much to see her hurting like that, and to know that I'm the cause of her hurt, and I don't know how to fix it. I silently begin to cry.. What have I done to you Sarah????
A/N: Remember what I said, this is not all Harm's fault. He just has a tendency to blame himself for things. He faults himself for not being able to save his father, and honestly, what can a six-year old do to save a father halfway across the world in hostile territory? Not much. Harm has always blamed himself for things that go wrong in his life. It's a carry- over of emotional scars from childhood. Mac has her own share of problems too. Only hers are somewhat different. This is why they need each other; they can't do it on their own, see why DPB needs to get them together now???