Chapter nine:
Marian's POV:
Robin studied me for a few moments longer coming to his senses.
"M- Marian? What a you doing here?" He murmured, looking too tired to be shocked.
"Um, I was checking up you and Much." I explained, trying not to be too hard on him, because he looked really upset. "You two stop turning up after two years, with no explanation. I'm bound to be a bit worried!"
"Come in, Marian. I'll explain everything, I promise." Robin stepped aside, to let me through the door.
Robin's room was nearly all wood, with green accents. His bed cover and curtains shared the same leafy shade. Robin's room was surprisingly clean and tidy the last time I saw it but this time there were clothes completely covering the floor.
While he was packing, I guess he didn't think anyone would really be seeing his room.
After he cleared some room on his bed, and we'd both sat down, he started to explain.
"The night we last met at the clearing, was the night my mother passed away." Robin was clenching his jaw, in an attempt to stop his lips from trembling.
"Robin, I'm so sorry! I can't even imagine what you must be going through." Immediately, I felt a pit in my stomach, I accused him of abandoning me! When, in reality his Mother had died.
He went on to explain that his Mother was always the accepting one, while his Father always wanted him to live up to the expectation of being a future Lord.
"Father said it was time to stop playing like a child, and become a real man." Robin wouldn't look in my eyes.
Taking his wet face in my hands, I was unsure of what to do. Robin was still looking down.
"Robin, look at me." His eyes met mine, filled with tears. "Your Mother loved you, and your Father only wants to give you the best opportunities you can get! He-"
Robin cut me off with a gentle kiss on the lips.
He broke away after a few seconds.
A bit breathless, I asked; "Wh-what was that for?!"
Robin's cheeks turned slightly pink, as he tried to play it cool.
"Just a little thank you. For always understanding me, when I don't even understand myself." He admitted.
Taking his hand, I squeezed it gently.
"I'm trying to explain it all, Marian. I really am. But my brain is a constant jumble of thoughts and actions, it just feels so load sometimes." He looked close to tears again.
"Robin, it's okay. Just breathe and try and explain everything in steps." Still holding his hand, I tried to calm him down. I was still confused as to why he couldn't have just told me all of this.
Something told me his Mother's death was the cause of something very big.
Robin's POV:
Explaining everything to Marian was harder than I ever expected it to be. Everything in my brain was screaming at me to just get on with it and tell her, but I wanted to hold off her sadness for as long as possible.
What made it harder, was that she was being even more gentle and kind than usual! While I was sitting across from her, a nervous wreck, trying to figure out how break the news to her. Marian was holding my hand, guiding me through this.
This isn't how I pictured this going.
She was saying something about telling her everything in steps.
"So first, Mother passed away," it was still an effort to keep my voice steady at the mention of Mother, "which made Father tell me I had to stop fooling around, and become a man."
Marian saw my throat bob, and stroked my back, comfortingly.
"Father then told me that in order to become a real man, that I would have to prove myself. By performing a specific task." The big bomb was about to drop, and it was getting hard to breathe again, even with Marian comforting me.
Closing my eyes, I tried to remember all of the happy times Marian, Much and I had, before I was about to ruin it.
Possibly forever.
"It's okay, Robin, take as long as you need." She soothed, gently.
"But that is exactly the thing Marian! I- we don't have much time left."
"What does that mean?" She let go of my hands, and her fingers went to her ring. Marian always touched it when she was anxious.
"It means, that my Father picked a task for me to fulfil." I looked into her eyes, in the hope that she would realise and I wouldn't have to say it out loud.
Because, if I said it out loud, it made it true.
"Marian, before I tell you this," Taking her hands back, so I was holding both, and looked deep into those stunning, crystal eyes.
"I need you to know that I love you, and I will love you for evermore."
"I love you too, Robin. Nothing will ever change that!" Marian smiled warmly.
"I don't know exactly how long I will be gone, but it will likely be a long time." I took a last deep breath, "I'm going on th-"
"The Crusade. You're going on the crusade." Marian's eyes clouded with emotion. Was it anger, sadness?
Marian's POV:
"I'm going on th-"
It was then that it came to me.
The Crusade.
It would explain everything, if it was a challenge that Robin's Father was looking for, then the Crusade was definitely fitting! It would take a long time, if he came back that is.
I felt myself cut him off, voicing my thought.
Tears stung my eyes, and my throat was tight.
Robin's lips were trembling and his eyes were every where but me. There were too many emotions running through me all at once, my mind was so loud. Did my parents know, is this what they were hiding?
"Marian," Robin's voice broke my thoughts, "I'm so sorry. I don't want to leave you, but Father is forcing me! But I promise you I will write every single day, not a day will go by where I don't miss you!" He was babbling through sobs.
I needed air, I needed to breathe. This was too much.
"Y-you can't just leave me! Robin, I love you!" Disbelief rushed through me.
"Marian, please I don't want to go! I want to stay with you! To make for memories." Robin was trembling, nearly as me.
Feeling myself stand up, I started to reach for the door. But Robin's hand grasped my wrist.
Then, I realised something.
"You were going to leave without so much as a goodbye?" I mumbled, not looking at him, my hand still on the door knob.
"I didn't want to upset you, Marian! The plan was that your parents would tell you after we'd left, to spare you the sadness of seeing us leave." Anger ran though my veins.
"My parents knew that my best friends were leaving before I did?!" I shouted, tears running down my face.
Robin inhaled, as if he was going to say something, but all I heard was his mouth opening and closing again.
Looking into his eyes, I saw how they were bright with emotion. He didn't want to go, but that didn't mean I couldn't be angry with him for leaving.
Taking him in, possibly for the last time ever, I noticed how much he'd changed since I'd first met him. His hair was a lighter shade, but his skin was tanner. His arms were more muscular and his smile lines had deepened. His eyebrows were furrowed in sadness, making his whole face mirror the emotion.
But amongst everything else, his gorgeous, green eyes hadn't changed one bit. They still saw into my soul, with that little twinkle in the corner.
My eyes caught on the little mark on his neck, which I'd made when we'd first met. Ironic that our first meeting was in anger and confusion, much like this, possibly our last goodbye.
"Goodbye, Robin." My hand was already turning the knob and as soon as I knew it, I was outside again.
Distantly, I could hear Robin shouting my name.
Tears fogged my vision; I didn't see where I was walking and bumped into someone. Already starting to apologise, I was shocked when I felt arms wrap around me in a hug.
My vision clearing slightly, I saw that it was Much.
"I'm so sorry, Marian! I don't want to leave you, please, please forgive me." He blubbered into my ear.
Pulling away so I could look at his face, I wiped away his falling tears with my finger.
"Oh Much, I wish it wasn't this way!" Already, I could feel more tears slip for my own eyes again.
It wasn't Much's fault that he was leaving, and even though he could stay, neither of us wanted Robin to be alone out there. Even though Robin's Father would be with him, he needed Much there too.
He squeezed me into another crushing hug, this one was so tight I thought my ribs would crack!
"Goodbye my friend, this is not the end of our friendship. I know it!" Gently, I pulled away.
Standing on my tip-toes, I kissed Much's cheek.
"Goodbye, Marian. I won't forget you!" Much smiled slightly.
Going in for one last hug, I whispered into his ear.
"Look after him, will you?"
I saw Much give a small, just before I turned away.
Already, I missed them. What would it be like to be away from them for this long? They could be gone for years! If I could barely last a week, what would years be like?
What am I without Much and Robin?
Running home, my mind kept traveling back to the little mark on his neck. It was something he would have to wear forever. Always reminding him of the girl he lied, and left behind.
I didn't think I would ever be the same again. Robin was my other half, and I felt empty with out him.
Coming to my senses, I began to my turn back. Robin wasn't the one I was angry at; I was angry at the world for letting this happen!
I arrived just in time to see a carriage coming down from his home. Robin caught sight of me in the open window, so I ran to try and catch up to the carriage.
"I love you, Marian!" He shouted, his face leaning out of the window. He looked surprised that I'd come back, but sad that he was still leaving.
"I'm sorry, I love yo-" A large stone tripped me up, cutting my sentence off.
The carriage was too far away now, he wouldn't be able to hear me, even if I screamed.
Robin said he'd write to me, but I don't know when his first letter would come, or if it ever would.
"I love you, Robin." I muttered, making my way home.
Please write to me soon. I thought, hoping that he wouldn't forget me.