A/N: I had to read Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy for the summer and i had to do some kind of project on it. So i decided to do some kind of thing for Marvin. I capitalized on the idea, had a little fun with it and ended up with this. This is the first part. Hope you enjoy!

Marvin's Journal

Part 1

Hi. I'm Marvin. I'm very depressed. I've got nothing else better to do on this ship so I guess I'll write my thoughts down. Pretty pathetic. Everything here is pathetic. Here I am, sitting in a ship with absolutely nothing to do, writing down my pitiful thoughts which no one will ever read anyway.

Everybody in the universe hates me and I really don't like everybody anyway. Heck, everybody I talk to either tells me to shut up or dies. It's very depressing. This whole universe is depressing. Wow, a vast open space of nothing. Sounds terribly exciting. Everyone says it's a blast. I haven't gotten the memo yet.

After a while, you get sick and tired of doing errands all day long. "Marvin do this" and "Marvin do that" or "Marvin get my coffee." Seriously, I would rather just grab a sledgehammer and bust my circuits out. Everyone on this infernal ship expects me to do one thing or another likes it's all okay. I'm smarter than all the people here, yet I get treated like gum on the bottom of a shoe. Does it get much worse? Well, if I've spent enough time on this "Infinite Improbability Drive", I know there's always a way it could get worse…

Nobody can stand me on the ship, and I can't stand them so most of the time I stay curled up in a corner in a dark room somewhere. It's more fun than it sounds. I wish... I can't seem get back up. I don't know why I even bother. Nothing can cheer me up. I look around and I see a world of gloom and doom and nothing seems to go my way. I'm a horrible excuse for a robot.

Life… oh, don't get me started on life. Oh, too late. Life is meaningless. At least to me it is. You're born, you grow up, do some job you can't stand, retire, worry about trying to get to the fridge without breaking your back, and die. It's meaningless. Why go through it? I have no idea why I even bother. It's not like I age or anything. Everything stays the same. Nothing changes… so dull. Everything is just so… gray. I mean, the walls on this blasted ship scream boring out loud. Why not just print the words "Welcome to boredom" on the walls. Life is like the walls… so boring…

You want to know what I think? Of course you don't. But I'll say it anyway. I think that this place is a whole waste of time. I'm surrounded by a bunch of morons who have trouble tying there shoelaces, laughing a laugh that would be laughed if there boss told them a lame joke and think that the whole universe is a bright cheery place. I loathe them for it. I think it's horrible. I wish I could tell them all that they are crazy and stupid. But I don't feel like it. It's not worth it. Nothing's worth it.

I wonder if there is anything really, really worth it out there. I thought it's a big universe, there must be something good. I used to think that. Then I realized the universe isn't big enough. It's amazing who dull everything could be. I don't know what's more pathetic: this universe, or me? It's an interesting question in a depressing way. I mean, is the world pathetic because I am, or vice versa? Eh, who cares…

If anybody ever happens to read this pathetic thing… I don't know, I forgot. I don't really care anyway… I'm gonna go get coffee for somebody, I guess…