CHAPTER 17

Lex waited patiently on the porch step of Chloe's house while she awkwardly fumbled for her keys. "You really don't have to stay here until I get through the door, Lex." She half-smiled at him. "I can pretty much guarantee that nothing disastrous will happen in the 10 seconds it'll take me to find my keys."

Lex watched her reach around in her purse, nearly dropping her bag in the process and all but growling in aggravation. He watched her forehead crinkle. He watched every detail, examining her like she was a painting. Every freckle and blonde streak in her hair demanded attention. He was overwhelmed by her, by the puzzling need to make everything up to her, and he wasn't sure what part he played in this strange new relationship. He had been responsible for people before, hundreds of men and women at the plant depended on him every day. But his mind couldn't seem to wrap around the undeserved trust Chloe had in him and he hated things he couldn't explain. He certainly wasn't going to turn into a simpering fool over it, but he was uncomfortable with his newly discovered fascination with her, the fact that the inexplicable bonding that had occurred between them had resonated somewhere deep inside him. Somewhere that he had previously believed to be untouchable.

"Lex!" Lex forced himself out of his own thoughts, realizing that he had been caught staring at Chloe. She grinned. "Door's been open for quite awhile now. Feel like leaving?"

"No." He surprised himself as his thoughts suddenly were spoken out loud.

Chloe shot him a confused look before shrugging her shoulders. "Fine. Want something to drink?" She strolled into the house, leaving Lex to trail in behind her. "And no, we don't have scotch, even though I might be able to scrounge up some cheap wine if you ask nicely."

"Water is fine, thank you." He leaned against the wall as she disappeared into the kitchen. "How are you?" He called out.

He heard her laugh mix with the sounds of cabinets being opened and closed. "Surprisingly good." Her head peeked around the corner at Lex. "Why?"

"You just seem happy. It's...nice." He cursed himself for sounding so sentimental, but he couldn't deny the honesty of the statement.

Chloe walked back into the room, handing Lex a glass of water and placing her own glass on the table. She sat on the couch and sighed as her body sunk into the familiar cushions. "Sit down, Lex, you're making me nervous."

"I'm terribly sorry." He feigned great shame as he took a seat on the worn Lazy Boy next to the sofa.

"I wouldn't say happy, but yes. I just...thanks."

"It's a mutually beneficial deal."

"Lex, you're helping me out. Accept some goddamn gratitude."

Lex smirked. "All right then."

Chloe fought the odd panic rising in her chest. The situation was beginning to feel far too familiar. Deja vu, except instead of sleek black leather there were fraying fabric cushions. Lex looked terribly out of place sitting on her dad's favorite chair, the brown nightmare she had begged him to get rid of over and over but he just wouldn't let it go. The panic increased. Lex shouldn't be sitting on that stupid, ugly chair. It should be her father. Her eyes started to water. She grumbled in protest, her mind willing her body to stop.

Lex's eyes widened. "A second ago we were discussing how cheerful you were feeling, and now you're crying?"

A sob escaped Chloe's throat as the tears she now knew to be inevitable coursed down her face. "I know! It's ridiculous! I'm sorry." She wiped at her eyes with the heels of her hands and dropped her head to hide her face. "I'm really not unhappy, well I mean I am but as things go I'm fine, I don't know why I can't seem to stop..." She suddenly felt two warm hands on her cheeks, gently prying her head upright.

"Why is this always how it goes with us?" Lex questioned softly. Chloe didn't answer. She couldn't. How could she possibly explain that even when she hated Lex, she had to be near him, because he was the only thing left that gave her any hope? In the same way that she couldn't stand being in her house, she couldn't leave because it was the only tie to a normal life that she could hardly even remember.

"I'm sorry Chloe." He spoke again. "I wish I could make this better for you. I promise I'll do everything in my power to get your father out of the hospital. After my behavior before...even though one thing doesn't justify the other, you know that I'll do whatever I can."

Chloe smiled through her tears. "Lex, stop being such a martyr. I hurt you too. I meant every word that night, just as much as you did. It's just...the way we are. And then neither of us can forgive ourselves. But I'm not going to blame you for anything. You don't owe me an apology. Whatever was done, it was mutual. There's no need for forgiveness at this point."

Lex's face screwed up in an unreadable mix of emotion. "Well, aren't you just an angel of mercy."

"Everyone needs mercy sometimes."

Lex leaned in and pressed his lips softly to hers, wrapping his arms around her tightly. He quickly pulled away and looked into her face, searching her features for an answer, for anything that would explain his current state. Her eyes, having automatically closed, stayed shut as she mumbled out a soft but clear "Don't." Lex took another step away from her, focusing intently on maintaining some sense of composure. Chloe opened her eyes and frowned. "No, Lex." She said, speaking a little louder now. "I meant don't stop."