Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from Naruto, they belong to Masashi Kishimoto-sensei.
Rated M: Language, non-con, and stuff…
A/N: My brain is dead from trying to write this… I spent a good 6 hours on the first paragraph. Although that could have been because I was busy trying to get One Piece Movie 5, which I still haven't gotten. :cries:.
I'm sorry it took so long to get this out, I think it's because I'm paranoid about the outcome of this chapter. Its unbeta'd and probably crappy beyond repair, but I hope you guys enjoy it. Feedback is greatly appreciated. (I just noticed I talk…err…type funny. lol)
Always Alone Chapter 9
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Fate was against him. It had been the longest of nights and he was beginning to lose himself in all of the confusion. There was a part of him that felt that there was no need to be conscious, he wanted to rest and replenish the strength to his injured body, to be lost in dreams…to forget. Yet he stayed awake, staring at the empty gleam on the tiled floors of his villages' hospital. His head bowed, shamed that he had been brought this low.
There was no excuse for what had happened. He was the one with the title of Captain, it was the captain's responsibility to look after his subordinates, yet his teammate had saved him.
The teammate whom he carried back to Konoha, strapped to his back, whose labored breathing had stopped midway. It was like carrying a corpse. The sensation that ran down his back as he felt the man slipping away still had not left his mind. It was self abusing to blame himself, but he felt responsible. If he had been paying closer attention to his surroundings, or had done something different…maybe then Kakashi wouldn't be fighting for his life on an operating table.
Get it together Shiranui!
He commanded his brain to shut down, to be patient, till this ordeal was over. If Kakashi lived, what would he think of his captain if he saw him berating himself like a crying child? And if the silver-haired man did pass…not make it through this ordeal then he could grieve. He rubbed at his tired eyes wearily, there was no point in getting anymore emotional at this point.
Despite all of his internal administrations, the fear crept into his thoughts and an unpleasant heat bubbled in his stomach. He could already feel the familiar clutch seizing his throat and knew that he was beginning to crack. Shiranui Genma, a respected captain and shinobi was breaking in the middle of a hospital hallway.
Breaking because of Kakashi...the man had made a promise to keep his squad members alive, even at the risk of his life. There was no reason to be so vigilant in the shinobi world; however, Hatake was one of the few exceptions who broke the ninja stereotypes with no hesitation.
The sense of duty to protect those in his team, although those teammates were complete strangers hiding behind masks, was naturally imbedded into Kakashi. He upheld justice despite being so close to the darkness of murder and treason. And because of that same upbringing within himself, Kakashi was now lying on an operating table.
Because he had to be a hero, Kakashi was a precious treasure of Konoha and the thought was making Genma sick.
It was my fault… He wondered where this self-abuse was coming from. He had lost teammates in worst situations, made sacrifices for his village. But this was different.
Genma sighed heavily, keeping his gaze downcast.
"Here," A quiet voice accompanied with a bump to his shoulder made Genma raise his head to glare at whoever was disturbing his brooding.
Genma scowled at the man standing before him, holding out a cup of vendor machine coffee…apparently fate liked to kick a man when he's down.
"It's not like I poisoned it."
As if you were skilled enough to do that. Genma bit back his tongue and forced a polite thanks as he took the drink.
"You're welcome,"
Although the bastard Chuunin probably did not mean it.
"When did you get back?" Genma pretended to drink his coffee, scalding his tongue while trying to keep from talking to the other man, "Are you going to answer any of my questions?"
"Go to hell…" Insulting someone was not considered talking, in Genma's opinion.
"Very mature," The sarcastic reply came.
"Let's get one thing straight, sensei, I do not like you…at all."
"Apparently…" Iruka sighed and swallowed his pride, "However that is not going to help either of us in this situation, I just wanted to know if you were okay. Not that I'm worried or anything," Iruka waved his hand, as if to dissipate a thought anywhere near resembling concern for the special-Jounin, "Knowing that baka of a shinobi, he's probably in there because he had to save some idiot's neck."
"What would you know about how Kakashi operates on the field?" Hot resentment flashed in Genma, "It's not like you would be anywhere near the level of missions he works on."
Iruka, for his part, just ignored the man's anger, "I know because I have faith in Kakashi."
"And how do you show that faith, you sleep with other people!"
"What did you say!" Iruka glared at the special-Jounin, his own anger breaking through.
"Fuck you-"
"That's enough you two," A barked command followed by the sound of rotating doors rocking on its hinges interrupted the two shinobi's fight, "This is a hospital not a bar, idiots."
"Well said Sakura," The Godaime spoke behind her apprentice, "Go take a break."
The young medic-ninja in training glared at the two older shinobi for a second before making her leave to the nearest break room.
"She's getting ruder everyday." Genma scowled at the disappearing figure of the pink-haired girl. Much like a certain Hokage…
"Give her some slack Genma. This was her first operation," Tsunade gracefully swooped down onto one of the waiting room's chairs, "On her Jounin-sensei no less."
"You let her do what!" Both Genma and Iruka yelled at the same time.
"I let her be extra careful on her first procedure, so she could give the best possible treatment for a person she cares about," The Godaime scowled at the men for yelling at her, "Who is the medical expert of us?" She huffed when neither answered her question, and instead turned their gazes away from her, "That's what I thought…brats."
"That's still twisted…" Iruka grimaced. Genma had to agree with that, but kept his opinion to himself.
"So…was it a success?" Genma stuttered, having forgotten to ask, panic once again seizing his thoughts.
"The brat will live…probably."
Thank god!
"Can we see him?" Iruka immediately asked.
"You know the rules Iruka, go home and get some rest, we'll see if he's in any condition for visitors tomorrow." She grinned as the Chuunin beamed, "I need to speak with Shiranui in private for a second."
Genma, ignored the Godaime and the bastard's conversation, lost in a state of relief and happiness. As he ignored the blonde's questions, increasing her agitation, he received a hard cuff to the back of his head.
"Huh? What was that Tsunade-sama?" He asked, rubbing the sore part of his abused skull.
"I was asking about your opinion on Kakashi's mental state."
"Ah, sorry," He blushed, "I explained it in detail in my report, but in shortened terms Kakashi mistook me for Iruka after he was hit by an attack, although I assume that it's been occurring prior to this particular mission."
"So he has been suffering from hallucinations…as I thought." She sighed, "That explains why he slipped into a coma."
"He's mentally stressed," She continued through the others' questions, "He should be fine, the brat has a strong enough will, but there's a chance that he could die."
"I thought you said he would recover?" Genma looked murderous, "Why would you lie?"
"There was extensive damage done to his system. That attack should have killed him, puncture wounds, poison and mental incapacity. The only positive that could have come from this is that Kakashi might have copied that jutsu before he was hit. " She glared defiantly at the younger man, "Also I only lied to Iruka, not to you, because I know you can handle it Genma. That was the main reason why I held you back. Now go home and get some rest."
Genma glared at Tsunade for a second before bowing and excusing himself.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You can't die you idiot
He stared down at the recovering form of Kakashi, his throat swelling at the sight. Sneaking in after visiting hours had been a bad idea after all…
"Iruka! Can you grab the dog shampoo for me?" Kakashi hollered from their shared bathroom.
A few seconds later Iruka entered the washroom and laughed at the scene of an unhappy drenched Kakashi.
"What happened here?"
"Summons do not like being clean…according to Pakkun's younger brother…" Kakashi growled at the smirking dog sitting in the shallow bathtub water, "You're getting it dog…"
Iruka burst out into a fit of laughter when the dog smirked, as best as a dog can, evilly at his master, licking his masked face before creating another wave of water in the tiny bathroom.
Kakashi's mask had been taken off, replaced by a medical scroll. A plastic tub was forced into his throat to provide oxygen.
What would I do without you…
The monotone of the life reading machines beeped on the walls…slowly the pulse was becoming erratic.
"It was a nice day," Kakashi said coyly as they walked to their apartment after a long day of traveling Konoha's streets. Not doing one thing in particular, but whatever sprang into their minds.
"Un," Iruka agreed, not quite as eager to break into any type of conversation, but wanting to enjoy the company of the man beside him.
"We should do it again sometime," Kakashi snatched Iruka's hand and grasped it tightly, "Although next time we should hold hands."
Iruka blushed, "But won't everyone see that we're together?"
"And I care about that because?"
Kakashi beamed as Iruka kissed him in the middle of the street.
Iruka caught up in his memories, gently clasped Kakashi's hand, hoping that the older man would squeeze his, like that day so long ago.
Are you running away from me?
The metallic beeping of the heart-monitor started to go dull, as if it was drowning all the sound out of the room, the death-declaring hum the only constant.
"Ne Iruka…"
"Hmmm?" Iruka hummed around the food in his mouth.
"I never asked this of anyone…but…I… um." Kakashi glared at the kitchen table, his pale cheeks glowing red.
"Heh…is it that important?"
"Of course!" Kakashi scowled, he was immediately on the defensive, which meant that it really was significant, "I mean if you are not going to take this seriously I might as well not ask."
"You're way too sensitive," Iruka joked, "But I'm listening, I promise not to laugh."
"Well…uh…" Again, it looked like Kakashi had developed laryngitis and was about to have a heart attack at the same time, "You promise not to run away?"
"Why would I run away from you?"
"Promise me."
"I promise."
"You would never leave me then?"
"Would you spit it out Kakashi…"
"Well…" Kakashi blushed again, "Will you move in with me?"
"Only on one condition," Iruka would have laughed if it weren't for the serious look Kakashi was glaring with, "You can't run away from me either…I'm sick of being alone."
Iruka was pounced in that instant surprised that they did not break anything in Iruka's cramped apartment.
"You'll never be alone…as long as I'm here." Kakashi whispered into his ear.
The room was completely quiet, the machines connected to the walls had died hours ago.
"You shit head…" Iruka whispered into the delicate crevice between Kakashi's neck and collarbone. The heat and tightness in Iruka's throat released, leaving hot trails to run down his face.
You liar!
"Come back Kakashi…come back." He sobbed.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
A/N: TBC…It's not over yet! 2-3 more Chapters, don't hurt me.:hides:.