Disclaimer: I don't own Trigun or any other anime - I just like making up stories…oh, and this is my second official fan fic and my first Trigun fan fic so I'll just apologize now if it sucks. Sorry!

Chapter Three: Look what a seed will grow…

A childhood spent in tyranny and pain can become a lethal poison to the adult. I stepped into his mind, and on that hallowed ground I saw the monsters of a past I never knew. The secrets he carried with him weighed him down, the child inside of him still cried in pain. Somehow even the closest brothers never knew each other. To sort it out, to straighten out that pain… God help me.

"Knives! How many times have I told you to shut up!" a voice bellowed and a burst of intense light few into the room. "You little shit! You think you're so smart! But you're a monster! You're disgusting! You're not even human! I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!"

Vash shuttered at the sound and winced as he tried to adjust his eyes to the new brightness of the room. He adjusted in time to see a child, blonde and adorned in a blue suit, being beaten mercilessly by a taller man. Vash stared. He knew the man. He knew the room. Project Seeds? Steve?

The child was crying. The man straightened himself from his labors over the sobbing child. He sniffed the air in disgust. "You really are worthless, you little monster. Rem doesn't love you; she's just having pity on you. No one really loves you."

He turned on his heel and promptly left the child in a heap of tears on the floor.

I had almost forgotten about that. Vash watched his brother. He hated us so much. How many years did we allow him to hurt us like that?

The child sat up and looked around himself. He shook his head and wiped his tears. He stood on shaking feet and clenched his small fists.

"You're the one who's disgusting!" the boy retaliated against the silence of the room. "You're mean! You're stupid! Rem does love me!"

If it were possible, Vash would have reached out and hugged this memory of his brother's past. Of course, invading his mind like this, Knives would have hated Vash if had detected him, but being comatose, he obviously didn't.

The young man was inspecting himself for injuries when the doors parted again and his twin entered the room.

"Hiya! Hey Knives, where were you? Rem and I waited for a long time and she told me all about these flowers called orchids, they don't have a smell, but they're really, really pretty and they come in all these colors and –" he stopped short. "Hey, what's the matter brother?"

"Nothing. Go on. What about orchids?"

"Oh, well Rem really likes them and they're hard to take care of and…."

The memory faded.

Vash shivered. How long did that go on? How long did I act so carelessly in front of him? I wasn't there for him. He was being beaten, abused, and I didn't even notice. I was too absorbed in Rem! I was to excited too notice the suffering of my own brother! He stifled a sob.

A fresh memory began to grow out of the darkness. I know this place too! Vash smiled up at the sky so blue and the soft, sweet smelling green grass below his feet. A large tree provided shade from the sun and the twins were stretched out under it, listening to a woman speak softly to them. Rem. Vash ran towards her before remembering that she could not see him. He smiled at her. She was describing Earth again. Why are you remembering this Knives?

"I wish I could take you there boys! You'd love it there! The birds sing so beautifully and we could have picnics everyday!" Rem was gushing again.

"I want to go there Rem! If you're going." a small Vash was agreeing with her.

"I don't." Knives interjected.

"Why would you say that Knives?" she questioned him.

Before an answer could be given the door opened and a woman entered the wilderness sanctuary.

"Rem, we need you on the bridge." She smiled.

"I'll be right there!" Rem smiled and turned back to the boys, "Alright guys, I'll see you this evening for dinner. Knives, you shouldn't say things like that, we'll talk more about that later. Vash, make sure you boys have washed yours hands after being in here." She smiled again and was gone.

"Bye Rem!" Young Vash was waving his hand like a lunatic.

"She can't hear you. She's gone." His brother reminded him.

"That doesn't matter! I'm still gonna say goodbye."

"I'm leaving. Are you coming with me?"

"No, I think I'll stay a little longer."

Knives got to his feet and brushed the dirty off of his pants. "Fine. See ya." He called over his shoulder.

Vash watched as his little self barely acknowledged his brother's departing. With a sigh, he followed his child brother pass through the doors and onto the ship. Knives returned to their bedroom and sat on his bed.

"Rem didn't even stay long enough to hear me out." He was frowning. "Maybe she really doesn't love me. Maybe I am a monster." He got to his feet and began to pace.

"Steve is so mean. Rem doesn't listen. They can't be average humans? Can they?" He stopped in his tracks. "If this is what humans are really like, than I don't like them! No, I hate them! My silly brother doesn't even notice it! I can't see why he loves them so much! Why doesn't he love me like he loves them? I am his family! I am his brother!" the boy began to cry. "Why doesn't he love me?"

The memory faded.

Knives. I do love you. I love you more than Rem. Didn't you know? Was I that bad at showing you? Did I drive you to hating them? Forgive me Knives. I'm a terrible brother, oh Knives! I need you to forgive me! Please! Vash cried now, his tears fell on the body of his brother and his body shook from the force of his sorrows.

Meryl awoke with a start. "VASH!" she sobbed while attempting to catch her breath.

"Oh Vash." She whispered into the empty room.

"Where are you?"

To be continued…

I've always felt sympathetic to poor Knives. I gotta say, it was the evil humans that made him do it.