Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans.

A/N: Yay I got 6 reviews for chapter 3 :) Sorry for the OOC in this story, why do I always go out of line? Sigh I guess I must try harder to write BBXRae fics in character cos I find it quite hard. Thank you for your reviews and comments. This is the last chapter of this story but I've still got a poem for the next chapter, please R&R :)

(BB's POV)

I was awoken by Raven's thrashing around. She was fidgeting non-stop and mumbling in her sleep.

"Don't…please…" she mumbled.

"Raven, you okay?"

"Don't hurt him…I'm sorry…"

"Rae, wake up!" I shook her body and shouted.

"Don't…no, please stop!" Her eyes shot open and she started panting.

"Is everything okay?" She shook her head and hugged me tightly.

"He…he was…he was…"

"Calm down, is it Trigon?" She nodded her head and tried to continue.

"He wanted to…to kill you, but…but I told him I…I won't try to feel again. I won't, I really won't." she shook her head violently.

"It's okay. Trigon's not here and he is gone for good. It's just a nightmare." I stroked her head when she sobbed into my chest.

She was just like a small child who had woken up from a nightmare and I was like her mother, calming her down. But I actually like it when she is weak because it somehow makes me feel needed and stronger. Nightmares of Trigon must have haunted her almost every night and I felt ashamed of myself to think that she always had to push down her fear or cry herself to sleep without anyone by her side to calm her down.

"Beast Boy, I'm…scared." She whispered in a shaky voice and looked at me.

"As long as we are here, we won't let him touch you okay?" She shook her head again.

"I…I don't want him to hurt you, I won't try to feel again." Her eyes were brimming with tears and innocence.

"Silly girl." I wiped away her tears. "To fight Trigon, you must show him you are nothing like him. You are human and he is not because you feel, he doesn't."

"I don't feel and I don't want to feel, I-"

"Really? You don't want to feel?" I looked into her eyes, seeking the truth.

"I…I-"

"Your eyes don't lie Raven. It tells me that being able to feel is the greatest dream of your life, isn't it?" She stared at me for a few seconds before turning away.

"Can…can we not talk about it anymore? I'm tired." She said softly and closed her eyes, leaning her head on my chest.

"I'm sorry I probed. Goodnight." I whispered back and covered her with my blanket before wrapping my arms around her.

(Raven's POV)

He is right, I want to feel. I want it so much that I'll do anything for it but not in exchange for my friends' safety. Why does he always make me feel? Why do I always want to feel when I'm around him? Why do I feel human and somehow wanted when I'm with him? Why does he always make me realize of my own existence and purpose? Why does he make me feel special? Why do I always wish to be around him? Why?

Why does it feel so safe in his arms? Why do I wish to talk to him when I am feeling sad? Why does it feel so comforting to cry in his arms? Why does it hurt to see him cry and why did it felt so painful when Terra broke his heart?

These questions are really confusing me and I don't know the answers. It is always Beast Boy, Beast Boy and Beast Boy on my mind. Why am I always thinking about him?

'Raven you got to face it. The answer is simple and you know it yourself.' Affection shouted.

'But I…I can't…I can't do it.'

'Just tell yourself you do.' She continued.

'I…I…' All my emotions kept quiet and waited for what I was going to say. 'I…I can't.' All of them sighed except Rage, who snarled.

'You can do it Raven.' Happy chanted and was soon joined by the other emotions.

'I…I love him, I love Beast Boy.' There was a series of applause and cheers when I finally found the courage to admit what I was avoiding. It felt good, it felt so good to get it off my chest.

Even though Beast Boy was not the best guy around, he sure knows how to make a girl feel special. He is always so caring and patient about people. What I hated and loved most is his perseverance. No matter how hard I hit him every time, he will just recover in a few days time and come up with another stupid joke to "cheer" me up. His concern is always so genuine and it is comforting to know that is someone who cares so much.

"Beast Boy…"

"You feeling uncomfortable?" Hs tone was full of worry and concern. I shook my head.

"I just wish to say, thank you so much for always being so nice to me."

"It's nothing, don't think much about it."

'Don't, please don't ever let go, don't ever let me go. I don't want to be alone, I don't want to be hurt again.' I thought desperately as I looked into his beautiful eyes.

(BB's POV)

Why is she looking at me in this way? Does she have anything to tell me? Is she feeling unwell and bottling things up again?

All these questions dispersed when she closed her eyes and snuggled close. I rocked her body gently and thought deeply.

Why does she suddenly seem so small and weak? Why does her every movement and every word she say matter so much to me? Why did I feel so angry when Malchior used her and toyed with her feelings? Why do I want to be with her when she is sad? Why do I always want to be around her? Why does it feel so happy to see her smile? Why do I always try so hard just to get her attention and impress her? Why do I always have the urge to kill when she is in danger? Why does the beast hurt anyone except her?

'You love her don't you?' That's why we fight to protect her, to ensure that she is safe.' The beast answered in a growl.

Do I really love her? I admit, to me she is really much more than just a good friend. Even though she does not seem to care much, she is the one I really need when I am sad. Raven really cares a lot. When Robin told all of them not to bother me after Terra's "death", she was the first one to approach me.

(Flashback)

"Beast Boy, it's Raven." She knocked on my door. "I just want to know if you are okay and ask if you need anything."

"Just go away, I don't even want to hear your voice." I hollered at her.

"I'm just concerned, I know you are still sad about Terra."

"You think you know everything? You can't even feel, you'll never know about affairs of heart! Why should you bother? You should be the happiest person on Earth now she is dead!"

"Fine, I won't bother you anymore!" She shouted and stormed down the corridors.

"Whatever, no one needs you anyway!" I yelled so loud tat I made sure she heard it.

I know I broke her heart. She was just concerned, why was I such jerk to say that to hurt her? I blamed her for the loss of Terra and I blamed her for nor liking Terra but why did I blame her? It wasn't her fault at all. Raven is one that doesn't trust someone easily but that's Raven for everyone. Since young, she was hurt again and again by people around her. I've learnt it the hard way because after Terra's betrayal, I found it harder to trust people. After one has been hurt so many times, he or she would be afraid to make friends with others due to the fear of being hurt once more.

Even though it was Starfire who sent my meals to me, I knew who prepared my meals for me when I found a strand of violet hair on my plate. Raven made the effort to cook for me even after the way I treated her. I knew that she sat outside my room for the whole afternoon during the days I locked myself in my room because she wanted to make sure I was going to be fine. She was the happiest one in the tower when I finally got out of my depression although she doesn't show her happiness and relief. But why did I hurt her with my words? Why did I yell at her and why did I call her creepy?

I looked at her relaxed features and smiled. It's good to see her relaxed and calm because it just makes me feel the same way. I caressed her cheek and touched her smooth skin. She is beautiful except that she has grey skin but I am in no place to mind her skin colour since I am green.

Actually Raven isn't much different from us. When I hurt her feelings, she would also feel sad. But unlike us she can't cry, she has to act as if nothing has happened and get on with life. She has to suppress, to lock up all the pain and keep it to herself. It must have hurt a lot to live a life like that, it's no wonder she has suicidal thoughts.

Should we let her go? Let her end her sufferings and leave forever? But…but I really don't want to, I really don't want to lose her. I just wish I don't have to let go, I want to protect her, to always keep her safe.

'I don't want to let go, I want you to be safe in my arms.' I thought to myself as I pulled her closer to me. She made soft sounds in her sleep and I thought it was so cute. I smiled at her small form before closing my eyes.

(Raven's POV)

It feels so warm and comfortable but the sun's rays woke me up. I opened my eyes slowly, trying to adapt to the light intensity. Beast Boy was still asleep, with his arms around me. I smiled and raised my hand to touch his face. Unexpectedly, his skin was smooth and unblemished. I smiled when I saw that there was drool threatening to fall off his chin and quickly wiped it away with a facial tissue.

"Mmm…I love you too" he mumbled and smiled in his sleep.

'He must be dreaming.' I smiled at his innocence and caressed his cheek.

"Terra! No…don't hurt her…Terra I won't love her…please…Raven…" I felt as if something squeezed my heart. He was having a nightmare, his dream became a nightmare because of me. I got out of his arms and ran to my room as tears found their way out of my eyes.

(BB's POV)

Raven and I were in the park. We are sitting on the field, side by side.

"Rae." I called her pet name and she turned to face me. "If I…I mean if you can only choose one emotion to feel, what would it be?"

"I…I, why do you ask?" she tried to look angry but couldn't hide her blush because her hood was down.

"I just want to know what I should give you to make you happy," I took her hand into mine, "because you are someone very important to me." I looked into violet eyes and she froze.

"I…the emotion that I want to feel most, it's…it's love." She answered and looked away but turned back to my face after a while. "Because I…I want to love you." She whispered and blushed. My heart skipped a bit when I heard what she said.

"Rae, I love you too." I moved close to her ear and whispered. I leaned closer to her face and soon saw her closing her eyes. I closed my eyes and moved my lips to hers.

"Slut! Witch!" A voice shouted, causing me to open my eyes (sigh, they didn't kiss). Terra rammed into Raven and pinned her down on the ground. The ground shook as she punched Raven and soon many rocks came flying over.

"Terra, no! Stop!" I shouted and scrambled to my feet.

"Beast Boy be careful!" I heard Raven shout and saw many rocks flying towards me. I waited for the blow but unexpectedly I wasn't hit. I was suddenly enclosed in a ball of black energy and it deflected all the rocks.

"Slut you can't love him, he's mine!" Terra yelled as she punched Raven in the face. Raven couldn't retaliate because she was using her powers to shield me.

"Raven fight back! Don't use your power to protect me!" I pounded hard on the shield but it just wouldn't budge. "Terra don't hurt her! You can do anything you want to me, she's innocent!"

"Why do you care so much about her? I'm the one you love. You can't love someone else Beast Boy, you belong to me!" Terra stood up and turned to face me, she was crying. "Witch, what magic did you use on him? He doesn't love you, he is mine!" She turned back at Raven and kicked her side.

"Raven, let the rocks hit me! Stop putting up this shield!" I shouted when Raven groaned in pain.

"Beast Boy stop caring about her, she's a witch, she's a demon! Why do you love her? In what way am I inferior to her?" Terra shouted and a rock crashed into Raven. "She is heartless!" A bigger rock slammed into Raven. "She's a monster!" Another rock came and Raven moaned in pain. "She says she loves you because she wants to win me, she wants to snatch you away from me! Don't believe her!" The shield vanished when another rock hit Raven and she lay in a pool of blood. I ran towards her and took her into my arms.

"Rae are you okay?" She opened her eyes and tried to nod. Tears fell from my eyes when I saw how badly injured she was.

"Beast Boy get away from her!" Terra yelled and tried to pull us apart but I pushed her to the ground.

"Terra I won't love her. Please stop hurting her, it's between the both of us." I hugged Raven tightly. "Raven…Raven she is innocent, don't hurt her."

"If you really love her so much," Terra let out an evil smile. "she will have to suffer!" Strong arms made of mud pulled me away.

"Terra please!" I pleaded and tried to struggle out of the grip but failed.

"If I don't get him, nobody ever does!" Terra's eyes glowed and a spear made of rocks formed above Raven. Terra smiled and the spear flew down towards the defenseless Raven.

"No!"

I was awoken by the sound of glass shattering. I heaved a sigh, realizing that it was just a dream and wiped the cold sweat off my face. Raven was nowhere in sight but there were broken shards on the floor, most probably what Raven's powers did to the lights. I got up and cleaned up the mess before the rest got home.

(Raven's POV)

I ran into my room and locked the door before burying my face in the pillow. Some of the things in my room exploded when tears started to seep into my pillow.

What am I thinking? Beast Boy wouldn't love me, he wouldn't. he wouldn't love someone who is a heartless demon, he wouldn't love someone who couldn't even feel or laugh at his jokes. He only loves Terra so why am I so foolish to like him?

"So what if I love him? He would never love me!" I shouted and let more tears soak my pillow. My books scattered all over my room when my bookshelves splintered and broke.

Actually it's all my fault. I was the one who assumed he would accept and love me. I was the one who allowed my feelings to override my senses. I was the one who allowed and couldn't suppress my desire to feel. I was the one who tried to feel and let myself get hurt. We are opposites, how would he ever love me.

'But all of these is going to end!'

'No Raven!' my emotions shouted.

'No more. No more heartache, no more tears, no more feeling.

'Don't do it!'

'I'm sorry but it's for the best.' I whispered and closed my eyes, letting the last fall before I lock up all of my emotions.

(BB's POV)

Finally I finished cleaning up the broken pieces. Judging from the number of lights broken, Raven must be angry at me for something but what is it? Is it because of yesterday? Is it because I probed into her matters and invaded her privacy? Is it because I hugged her to sleep? Is it because we were so close to one another and she minded the physical contact? Is it because I had hurt her feelings in some way or is it because I made her feel?

Thought played in my mind as I walked up to Raven's room to check if she is fine. I knocked on the door and called out her name. The door slid open, revealing only half of her emotionless face under her hood.

"What?" she asked in a monotone.

"I just want to check if you are alright. I mean I couldn't find you when I got up and I was worried and I thought-"

"Look, what happened yesterday was nothing." She interrupted. "I can't remember what happened yesterday so you better forget about it too."

"But Rae I…never mind."

"My name is Raven, don't call me Rae!" she glared at me with her cold violet eyes.

"Ok, or…do you want breakfast? I can prepare your tea-"

"No I am not hungry." She cut me off again. "Thank you."

"Anytime."

"Is there anything else?"

"No, I-"

"Good!" she replied and closed her door.

I walked down the stairs with my head hung low. Her eyes were cold. She locked up her emotions again and all I could see was pain. I don't even know what mistake I made to make her angry. I was also mad at her for blowing up on me for no good reason.

I sighed. No matter how hard I try, she won't love me. Who would love someone who is green, immature and insensitive? She is so clever and her dream guy must at least meet her intellect level. Raven won't even consider me as a choice, she won't love me. What's the point of loving her? She won't love back. It's just a wishful part of my thinking. Should I or should I not give her up? Should I stop thinking about her and should I forget about how much progress we had made yesterday night? She is a mystery that I have not solved since the day we met. But should I stop now and let all my efforts go down the drain? Should I or should I not?

A/N: I know it sucked to end a story in this way. Next chapter is a poem Beast Boy writes for Raven after this incident, so please also read my next chapter too.

teakigirl: )