Disclaimer: I don't own Rent, 'cause I'm lame like that.
Just Another Junkie
You broke my heart when you said those things to me. I remember what you said, right down to the very look in your eyes. I tried to explain- there was nothing between me and Benny, and you knew it! But you said "Mimi…I don't care." But I knew you did, Roger. I turned to Angel for guidance, but then she was…gone…and I turned to Joanne and Maureen, but they were having their own problems. Collins was too torn up about losing Angel, and Mark was busy trying to make a living with his films.
I tried to stop the drugs! I tried! You stayed with me until that bit at the end…Angel's funeral…I remember.
I was there with Benny, and Maureen and Joanne started their fights up again. Then you and I got in it too. They got back together. You…you went to Santa Fe. For a whole year, I had to live without you. Without the comfort of knowing you were just one apartment up, that I could come and see you, if only to be sent away again.
Then came the eve of when we first met. Christmas Eve, you came home. I remember that, too.
The day I…The day you…said those things to me. But this was different than what you had said that hurt me so much. It meant more than that. As I lay dying on the streets, everything I'd owned spent on my drugs, Maureen and Joanne found me and brought me to you. I thought I'd die out of your sight and your heart, but you brought me in, lay me in front of you, and sang that song you wrote. All that time in Santa Fe, and all you did and thought about was writing this song…for me? I died there. As the sound of your guitar faded, the lights grew brighter, and then, all of a sudden, there was Angel. She smiled at me, and said "You turn around, girlfriend… And you listen to that boy's song." That's what I did. I came back to you, and you let me back into your life. You said to me "There's only us. There's only this. Forget regret, or life is yours to miss. No other road, no other way- No day but today."
Roger, from the moment on that Christmas Eve, in 1989, all I had for heat was a candle you lit for me, I felt something. I knew that you had felt it too. That night, we both fell in love. And I think that despite everything that happened in the year we tried to figure out that love, somebody else had a plan in action, and by decimating our love, He made it even stronger.