Cloud didn't understand it. Why was it that Aerith had insisted upon coming here, this dead city only inhabited by the vague ghost of the Cetra knowledge? He had woken in the middle of the night to the sound of a faint voice. Rather, the mental projection of a voice. But it was Aerith's voice. He just knew it was. It didn't speak to him or call him. It simply hummed, wavering in and out of perceptible volume. She was just humming the same gentle tune continuously. It was delicate with frills of sweet sentiments, but its core was melancholy. Just hearing his psychic acoustics ring with the fragile sound of Aerith humming this rueful yet heartening melody despaired Cloud. And even more unsettling was a vibration he had felt the moment he woke up. It had only lasted a second, but it was recognized easily enough. Sephiroth. He had to find Aerith before Sephiroth could take control of his mind.

After shaking Cid and Tifa from their restful slumbers, he attempted to collect his thoughts so as to explain what he was feeling. When all three were finally dressed, Cid took his awakening in a less than graceful fashion.

"Cloud, you jackass! Do you know what time it is? A goddamn jackass, that's what you are. This better be good." he chided. After retrieving a cigarette, he pushed it between his taut lips, and searched his back pocket for a match. Tifa stretched her muscles a bit in the same manner she always did upon waking so as to be ready for any possible battles. Cloud was clearly preoccupied, his arms folded across his chest and a very grave glimmer in his eyes.

"Aerith is here," he finally said. His head sank. "... and so is Sephiroth." Cid's cigarette fell from his gaping mouth.

"Wa-wa-wait a minute! You serious?" he said incredulously.

"But how can you tell?" Tifa asked. Cloud shook his head.

"...It's not an excuse. I can't even explain it. I just feel it in my soul. Aerith is nearby." Cid scratched his dry forehead, worry beaming through his stare.

"Shit, Cloud, we can't be sitting around on our asses," he said. Cloud unfolded his arms, and looked up at his two companions. He nodded his head in agreement, and the three of them left the house together.

Following only the humming in Cloud's mind, the three of them scavenged the Forgotten City for any sign of Aerith. They were led to the northern half of the city through a path of coral-like branches and tall trees. At the opening of the path, a building, shaped like an enlarged conch shell, that lay across a shallow lake came into their view. The full moon rained light down upon the quivering water and the oceanic-inspired building. Making their way through the coiling path inside the shell house, they found a set of steps leading down into the Earth that had been blocked previously.

"Aerith is down there... I know she is. I can hear her voice. She's getting closer." Cloud rushed down the steps, the other two close behind. He found himself being led into a city of glass deep inside the planet. It was nothing like Midgar. It was ancient, like the Cetra themselves. Chiseled spikes of crystal loomed around the city's edges, and towers of varying heights were suspended above the ground level of this dead capital. Running down the long set of spiraling glass-like steps, he made his way into the heart of the underground, crystal city. The sound of Aerith's hushed voice was growing in proximity.

Cloud didn't know what he would say once he found her. He wasn't sure that he could even verbally express the concern he had felt all this time she had been gone. He wanted to see her so terribly, yet what he had done at the Temple of the Ancients made him even more afraid of what Sephiroth might make him do if he ever came in her presence again. His heart pounded with the anxious anticipation of finding her. He needed to see her. Everything made sense when Aerith was around.

Cloud finally found himself at the bottom of the steps, Cid and Tifa panting heavily when they caught up to him. He faced a pool of blessedly immaculate water, and that's when his eyes fell upon her. Across the water, Aerith prayed atop a risen altar. Jumping up the stair-like pillars to her figure on the raised altar, Cid tried to follow, but Cloud insisted on seeing her alone. He needed to see her alone. He needed a chance to explain his disorganized emotions to her, all of the fear, the anxiousness. She would give his mind clarity as she always had.

His feet found the floor of the altar, and there she was. She was there. After all this time, she was really there. He could've hugged her in his relief. That moment represented nothing but a pure exultation for Cloud. He was only a few feet away. Her praying image was reflected on the glass-like surface below her with radiant iridescence. She was there, her expressive eyes closed in religious reverence. She was sitting on the heels of her boots, and held her feminine hands to her chest, fingers locked together. Her head bowed, Cloud moved forward to wake her from her trance.

Jenova.

Aerith's humming was gone now, replaced by thousands of malignant voices whispering from within his own mind. Cloud couldn't hear anything. He rose his sword over his head. He couldn't see. There was nothing. Cloud, kill her. Nothing. Bring the sword down, Cloud. Nothing. Kill Aerith, Cloud. Nothing. Kill her. Nothing. KILL HER NOW, CLOUD. KILL HER NOW. Nothing but the whispering, maliciously coaxing him to carry the sword down with all of his momentum. His conscience was a thinning thread. What was he doing? Where was Aerith?

"CLOUD!"

"STOOOOP!"

Cloud stepped back. Did he just almost kill Aerith? He was shocked. He couldn't believe it. He was scared of himself. What was Sephiroth making him do? What if Cid and Tifa hadn't yelled for him to stop?

Aerith's green eyes fluttered open. Looking curiously at her surroundings, her eyes fell into Cloud's. She looked up at him, blinking slowly as though she hadn't realized before that he was standing there. Or that she was unaware of what he almost had just done. No, she must've known.

"Aerith..." He didn't know what to say. What could he possibly say to her to make up for first beating her and now almost killing her? How could he tell her what he had been feeling all this time she wasn't nearby? And in that regard, what exactly had he been feeling?

Aerith's eyes lit up with sympathy, and she smiled. A smile so sweet, so pulchritudinous, so loving. Such a simple smile, but it erased everything. Cloud didn't feel pained anymore. Aerith knew what he was feeling, and she understood completely. She understood his thoughts and his broken mind. Aerith understood him. He had no need to worry because Aerith understood. Even when he couldn't decipher his own feelings, she could. Aerith... she looked so beautiful.

Cloud felt a disturbance break the serene aura exuding from Aerith and her pure smile. Darkness, humid and pregnant with the promise of evil tidings, hung in the thickening air above them. The sky became turgid with a formidable and aversely recognizable presence. Cloud saw nothing but a flash of lambent moonlight reflecting off a polished blade as the cloaked figure of villainous idolatry fell from the unforgiving heavens.

The smile melted off her face. Aerith fell limp in an instant. Her hands, once folded in prayer, fell to her sides lifelessly as gravity pulled her forward. Her front half bent over, being only held up by the masamune still skewered through her abdomen. Sephiroth withdrew his sword, a trail of Aerith's blood lingering on the blade, with the surreal lack of speed that made Cloud think this was all a dream. Thoughts of disbelief flooded Cloud's mind until no single thought was discernable. What was happening? No, this couldn't be real. It wasn't possible. It wasn't.

"Aerith!" He rushed to her as she toppled forward. He caught her in his arms, the arms he always secretly dreamt of holding her with, the arms that were now granted their ironic wish. Cloud shook her, desperately hoping that there was some chance... some chance that she could be okay. "This can't be real!" Nothing was going to wake him from this nightmarish fantasy.

"Do not worry," Sephiroth began, celebrating his victory over the sweet and quirky flower girl. "Soon, the girl will become part of the Planet's energy. All that is left will go North. The Promised Land waits for me over the snowy fields. There, I will become a new being by uniting with the planet's energy. As will this girl." Cloud was shaking in fury.

"...Shut up," he managed to mutter through his gritted teeth. "The cycle of nature and your stupid plan don't mean a thing!" Without her, what really mattered? Black Materia. Meteor. Sephiroth. None of it was important. "Aerith is gone." Cloud looked down at her. Aerith. Lively, beautiful, compassionate Aerith. How could this be possible? His mako-blue eyes overflowed with nostalgia as he remembered the all too few moments they shared together. Wonderful and dangerous alike. "Aerith will no longer talk, no longer laugh, cry... or get angry." Every memory now stung him deep in his heart. Every endearing smile. Every stubborn pout. Every silly joke. The flowerbed in the church where they first met. Venturing into Don Corneo's mansion together for Tifa's sake. Saving her from Shrina and the Turks. Learning about the Lifestream at Cosmo Canyon. Hearing the Cry of the Planet. Stealing the Tiny Bronco. Their date at the Gold Saucer. Watching the fluorescent fireworks from the gondola ride...

"What about us... What are WE supposed to do?"

Cloud... I'm searching for you.

"What about my pain?"

I want to meet you.

"My fingers are tingling."

I know, I know. What I mean is...

"My mouth is dry."

I want to meet...

"My eyes are burning!"

you.

Cloud's glass heart thumped heavily until it finally shattered. His tears poured over the rims of his eyes. His pain was too great. He wanted her back. He begged and begged to have her back. He would do anything just to hear her laugh again, see her smile once more, feel the unconditional love that never stopped radiating from her. Tears raining down his cheeks, Cloud hugged her with all his might. He rocked back and forth as he held her in some attempt to comfort his unadulterated misery.

He had loved her. All of this time, he had been in love with her. He loved Aerith. It took him until now to realize it, but he was sure of it now. The most amazing person he had ever met. The most wonderful person he had ever met. No one had ever meant so much to him. He loved her. He cared for her more than anything in the world. She couldn't be gone. Not now. Not now that he finally understood his feelings. Everything made sense. It was all clear to him. What he felt that night on the gondola. He had been in love with her all of this time. That which was most precious to him... gone. It wasn't fair. It wasn't right. Not Aerith. Rather himself than Aerith. His only love.

"What are you saying? Are you trying to tell me you have feelings too?" Sephiroth's apathetic voice broke in. Cloud's rage soared again. After he gently laid his beloved down on the floor of the altar, Cloud stood up to face the silver haired man in black who now represented everything he wanted to tear apart.

"Of course! Who do you think I am?" Sephiroth laughed in a way that could make anyone's blood turn over.

"Stop acting as if you were sad. There's no need to act as though you're angry either. Because, Cloud. You are..." Sephiroth transformed into a hideous Jenova monster. Cloud unsheathed his sword, glad to have been given the opportunity to massacre this creature.

He used no restraint nor mercy. He used Jenova Life as an outlet for all of his anguish, but even after the battle's end, the weight of his grief had not lightened an ounce.

"Because, you are... a puppet," the voice of Jenova rang in his head.

The others took their turns to mourn. Cid was greatly distraught. Not even being quite able to cope with the shock of it all, he walked away. As Cloud watched them silently express their pain, his focus was on the gaping hole in his life. His tears had stopped, but there was no glue that he could mend his heart with. It was broken. Not pierced, not wounded. Broken. His heart had been fragile to begin with, but now...

Tifa ran off in tears, and Cloud approached Aerith. He picked her up with delicacy lest he be too harsh and hurt her-- even though he knew she was gone. He descended from the altar, Aerith in his arms, to the pristine lake that glowed like it was speckled with stars. He couldn't think of anything more fitting than to give her back to the planet she had cared for so dearly.

Lowering her, Cloud realized that the bow in her hair and the materia were missing. He almost went back to the altar to find them so he could put them in their rightful place, but he ultimately decided that it didn't matter anymore. She was gone. A pink bow in her hair made no difference. He would just have to accept that he had lost her. No matter how much he had loved her... she was gone.

He finally let her go. For a moment, she floated atop the water, her white hands folded on her chest. He forced himself not to focus on the pain. It was Aerith's gift to everyone. She had sacrificed her life for the planet. Maybe she didn't know that this was going to happen, but she was willing to risk it. He stepped back and watched her sink into the water. This was reality. Aerith was gone. Cloud didn't understand how, but Aerith was... gone. As she disappeared into the darkened abyss of the lake, all he could do was lament his inability to tell her how much he loved her. If only he had realized sooner. What was he to do now?

Aerith's gift to the planet... her life. All the more reason to continue his journey. To save the planet she gave herself to. Sephiroth would pay for this.

..-+-..

Cloud awoke in a sweat. He was still in the woods, the embers of the fire dimming slowly. The most horrible memory he had. His subconscious lingering over it had taken the form of a nightmare. Aerith's death... the only memory of her he wished he could forget.

He sat up as he breathed heavily.

"Are you only a part of me as a memory?" he whispered, shaking his head. Where was she? "I don't want to lose you..." He dug his face in his open palms. What was he going to do if she was just a memory? What if he lost her? Aerith... his love.

Too afraid of having the nightmare again, Cloud stayed up all through the night until dawn.