A/N: Last chappie of the night, so enjoy!
Disclaimer: I own nothing… especially not Harry Potter
Happy Reading!
Chapter 3: Vanilla Chai and Poker
The next morning, I skipped my jog and dragged my sorry carcass out of bed at five thirty. I was starting to see the signs of my pregnancy, and I was feeling some mixed emotions over it. I mean, all women feel self-conscious during their pregnancy, do they not? And I was without a warm, loving James Potter to tell me that I look great, even if he doesn't think so himself.
Anyway, I changed into my day clothes, applied a trace amount of cover-up over my dark circles, and apparated before the gates of Hogwarts school. I hurried up the slopes and sent my patronus out in front of me to tell Dumbledore that I had arrived. When I reached the front door, I found that it was unlocked and I hurried up to the headmaster's office.
I reached the top of the stairs and knocked on the door.
"Enter," Came a voice from inside, and I did so.
Dumbledore was sitting at his desk, watching me with a curious expression. He gestured towards the chair in front of his desk, and I sat down gratefully.
"My dear Lily, for what reason do I have the pleasure of greeting you so early in the morning? And how is your child doing?" he asked, his blue eyes twinkling behind his spectacles.
I clasped my hands together and told him that the pregnancy was going fine. I then struggled to find the words to start the conversation I had came to discuss.
"Well, Albus, I made a mistake," I said, "But I am not sure if it was a bad mistake or not."
I proceeded to tell him about my finding of Severus, my helping him, and my discovery of his most recent years, including the killing of my late husband. When I finished the story, I looked down at my feet and waited for a scolding of sorts. The answer I received was not what I had been expecting.
"Ahh, mixed blessings, how often they do come about. I do not think that what you did was a mistake. Perhaps, a little unwise, considering the circumstances, but not a mistake."
I looked up at the headmaster, who was gazing at me thoughtfully.
"You see Lily, when you took in Severus without consent, you opened up your heart for the first time in a long time. It would seem that Severus has done for you what nobody else has been able to do," he said.
"You mean kill my husband?" I said sarcastically.
Dumbledore gave a chuckle and said, "No, I mean he has begun the process of befriending you. Before you contradict me, let me explain. After the death of James, you locked yourself up at home – both literally and figuratively. You have not had casual conversation with another person in a long time, at least voluntarily. From what you tell me, you have had conversation with Severus, and you have done it without him approaching you. You have begun to open your heart to another person, and that, Lily, is progress."
"But I don't know what I am supposed to be feeling right now," I said, shaking my head, "I mean, he killed James! Most people in my shoes would go berserk, not befriend Severus."
"The fact that Severus killed James is no more than that – a fact. Severus did not want to kill James, nor did he kill him voluntarily. I suggest, because that it is probably a subject of sensitivity for the both of you, that you disregard the fact. It may seem hard, but I am not telling you to forget James. I merely think that you should not look upon Severus as James' killer, but Lord Voldemort. It is because Voldemort that Severus was forced to kill James in the first place."
It made sense to me, and I said so.
"However, housing a wanted, former Death Eater at your house is tricky business," Dumbledore continued in a grave voice, "And you should be wary if you should decide to take him into London, as always. Know your options and keep your head up. I do think that keeping Severus at your home would be the best idea, seeing as your home is protected by the Fidelius, and I have no intention of giving away your whereabouts."
Our conversation continued without any other important aspects, or at least aspects worth mentioning. I thanked the Headmaster, stood, and headed towards the door. My fingers were about to touch the handle when Dumbledore spoke to me again.
"And Lily, one last thing…"
I turned around and faced the Headmaster, who was sporting a small smile.
"When the time comes, think about your future, and not so much of the present. It would seem that your future child has everything but one aspect – and a rather important aspect, at that."
We shared a silence for a moment, his eyes on mine, before I nodded, turned the handle of the door, and left.
I stopped at the Starbucks in London closest to Godric's Hollow on my way home to get myself a treat from my childhood. Back before I knew I possessed magic, my mother and I would go to Starbucks every Sunday and get a Vanilla Chai. This was a memory from my childhood that I loved immensely, and I often stopped by the café on Sundays. When I walked in the door, I was greeted by the cheeky Muggle cash register-worker.
"The usual?" he asked me with a smile.
"Yes, but double that order, if you don't mind," I replied with a smile as I approached the register and drew a twenty-pound note out of my pocket; I carried Muggle money for times like this.
"Ooh," said the boy at the register, "Have you found yourself a nice bloke to buy a Chai for?"
"Yes, I suppose you could say that," I replied, handing over the note.
"Shame, I thought I was your man," he said in a mock-sadness tone.
I laughed and replied, "Don't worry; as long as you keep the Chais coming, you are my man."
He laughed, too.
"Good. I don't want to lose my favorite customer," he said, winking as he handed me my change. Someone placed two hot Chais on the counter, which I scooped up in both hands after pocketing my change.
I thanked him and left the café, the little bell on the door ringing merrily behind me.
> > > > > >
I managed somehow to open the front door with my hands full of bags and Chais. I had stopped on the way home to pick up a few ingredients from the Apothecary for my monthly brew. Anyway, I walked into the house and backed into the door so it would close. Standing in the main entranceway was Severus, looking cross and pajama-clad. His arms were crossed across his chest and he was glaring at me with a frustrated expectancy.
"So, where did you go this morning?" he asked icily, his narrowed beetle-black eyes burning figurative holes into my stomach.
I stepped forward and shoved the warm Chai I had purchased into his hands. He looked at it, startled slightly out of his anger.
"What is this?" he asked, bringing the travel cup up to his long nose and sniffing the contents suspiciously.
"It's not poisoned, and I think you'll like it," I replied cheerfully, sipping my own and savoring the vanilla-cinnamon taste in all its glory. "Mmm…"
"Yes, but what is it?" Severus persisted impatiently.
"It's good, just drink it," I replied, taking another sip.
Severus brought the cup to his thin lips and took a tiny sip. His eyebrows shot up in surprise, and he looked into the cup as if he had never seen something to amazing.
"It's pretty good," he said, and took another longer sip, "Actually, it's quite good."
He quickly chugged the rest of the Chai and smacked his lips greedily. He looked at me, ignoring the slightly scandalized expression on my face. His eyes fell on the cup in my hands.
"Are you going to finish that?" he asked in a voice that would have been casual had he not been flexing his fingers and shifting on his feet.
I quickly dropped my bags and cradled my Chai away from his view.
"You can't have this! It's mine, pig!" I said, and took a protected sip, "It's your fault you drank yours all at once!"
He grumbled something that I did not catch and marched into the kitchen. I picked up bags and followed suit. I dumped the bags on the kitchen table, finished my Chai with one last swig and let out a sigh on contentment. Severus came over to where I stood and picked up a bag.
"These are all the ingredients for Wolfsbane," he observed, glancing at all the ingredients on the table, "A recent discovery, the Wolfsbane potion, no?"
I nodded and picked up a bag of something and said, "I am a practiced and accomplished brewer."
"You're not a werewolf, are you?" he asked bluntly, and I laughed.
"No, of course not!" I replied, gathering all my ingredients into a heap on the table, "I'm brewing it for dear Remus. He never was much of a potion-maker."
"Agreed," Severus said with a nod, "So he will be stopping by, I presume?"
I nodded and he made a strange noise that reminded me of a dying cat, his features contorting with loathing. I ignored him and brought my cauldron out from under the sink and placed it on the stone floor. He stood and watched as I sank to the ground and started a contained fire under the cauldron and began making the potion. He handed me ingredients as I asked for them, and occasionally gave me a helpful hint or two.
"You don't need the potion-making book?" he asked, but I waved away his question.
"Of course not, I've made this potion a billion times," I said, about to pour a measured amount of lacewing into the potion when –
"Don't!" Severus exclaimed, and my hand froze with the lacewing about to be poured into the potion.
"What?" I asked impatiently.
Severus glared at me and replied, "It's a half cup lacewing, not a whole cup. You would have killed him."
I felt my face drain of color as I realized he was right. I emptied half of the cup and took a deep breath.
"Thanks, Sev," I said, "You're a life saver."
Severus said something I didn't hear, and I continued with the potion, being a lot more careful than before. An hour later, the cauldron was simmering away on the floor, and I had finished tidying up my mess. I washed my hands in the sink and I turned to Severus, who was standing against the wall, his arms crossed.
"We'll go into town in about a few minutes, alright?" I said, drying my hands on a towel.
"Yes, I suppose." Severus replied, "I'll be ready momentarily."
Five minutes later, we had flooed into Diagon Alley. I dusted off my robes (I hate floo travel) and watched as Severus stepped gracefully out of the fire and patted his robes down. He had done a charm on himself so that he could be properly disguised. He now bore a resemblance that shockingly reminded me of Sirius, though he still had his Severus-like figure for the purposes of getting his robes fitted. The combination was extremely awkward. I clapped my hands together and smiled.
"Excellent!" I said cheerfully, "Let's go to Gringotts first, shall we?"
Severus nodded and we were on our way. We went to Malkin's where he purchased several new robes, and Ollivander's, where he got a new wand. Ollivander somehow recognized Severus right away, but I made him promise not to say that we had paid a visit. We left a few minutes later, Severus thoroughly inspecting his new willow wand with a smug expression on his face. We flooed back to the house, as we could not apparate there, and I began setting the table and making dinner. Severus, now looking like himself again, hauled my cauldron out of the kitchen, and when he came back, the table was set for four and I was arranging some flowers for the centerpiece. Severus' eyes narrowed as he counted the plates on the table.
"Four?" he asked skeptically, looking up at me from the plates I had arranged.
I wiped my hands on my shirt and bustled back over to the stove, where I was cooking a pot roast, potatoes, and spaghetti.
"Yes, four. Don't tell me I forgot to tell you that I'm having Remus and Sirius over for dinner?" I asked calmly, though my insides were squirming uncomfortably.
Severus suddenly looked angry as he replied, "You might have forgotten to mention that detail."
I wrung my hands.
"Well, now you know," I said in a voice I hoped was confident.
"Well, in that case, will not be joining you," Severus said, looking malicious.
I gaped.
"Yes, you will!" I exclaimed, feeling anger creep up from the pit of my stomach, "If you're going to live here, you're going to do as I say!"
"Then I do not wish to stay any longer!" Severus said angrily, and stomped out of the kitchen towards the front door.
My eyes grew wide and I ran after Severus, who was opening the front door. I caught up to him and closed the door, and then stepped between Severus and his way out. Panting, I pushed the hair out of my face that had escaped from the ponytail.
"No! You must stay!" I pleaded, "You'll be killed if you go!"
He looked as if he wanted to hi me, but he held himself back.
"I can take care of myself! I don't need help from you." He hissed, trying to get around me to the door.
I blocked his path again, and he finally growled, picked me up, and moved me over. He turned the knob on the door and stepped outside. I stomped my foot, tears in my eyes.
Severus was halfway down the steps when I screamed, "You coward!"
I had obviously struck a nerve. He stopped in his tracks, rigid, and spun around. He drew his wand and pointed it wand at me, fuming.
"What-did-you-call-me?" he hissed.
"You heard me!" I yelled, letting a tear escape from my eye and slide down my face, "I said you're a coward! You can't even be man enough to face a childhood enemy!"
He took a deep breath, stuffed his wand back in his robe, and walked back into the house, seemingly trying to stay calm. His hands shook.
"I am not a coward," Severus said, stomping by me and into the bedroom.
I jumped as I heard the door slam violently, though I was glad that I had succeeded in keeping Severus safe.
An hour later, I stood back from the table proudly, admiring the beautiful dinner that I had prepared. I patted my stomach and smiled.
"Just wait," I whispered to the fetus that could not hear me, "You're gonna love this."
As I said that last comment, the doorbell rang, and a flounced from the room to answer the door. I turned the handle and stepped back, allowing Remus and Sirius to come inside.
"Lily!" Sirius exclaimed, putting the flower vase that he had been holding into Remus' hands and giving me a giant bear hug, "Long time, no see!"
"It's nice to see you, Sirius," I said, and then gave Remus a hug, "And you, too, Remus."
"You look awfully cheerful," Remus said with a smile, handing the vase back over to Sirius, "I don't remember the last time the three of us shared a meal together."
"Yeah, you've been hauled up in this cave forever," Sirius said in agreement.
I shuffled my feet and force a smile. I had, indeed, been cooped up in my house, and for a long time at that. But it wasn't my being cooped up that was bothering me.
"Hey, guys," I said slowly, "We're not eating alone today."
"What do you mean, Lily?" Remus asked, and a look of concern flickered over his face.
"Well, you see, there's someone that's –" I began, but just then, the door of my bedroom opened and Severus stepped out, looking strangely rehearsed.
There was a crash as Sirius dropped the vase, which hit the floor and shattered, sending flowers everywhere. I stared, slightly panicked, back at Sirius and Remus to see that Sirius' mouth had dropped, and Remus suddenly had an extremely closed look about him.
"Snivellus?" Sirius said, turning to me in disbelief, "What's he doing here? Was he in your room? What's going on?"
"Yes, I would also like to know what's going on," Remus said gravely.
I opened my mouth to speak, but Severus strode over to my side and spoke for me.
"Lily has kindly offered me a place to stay for the time being," he said coldly.
"Oh really?" Sirius said, "Well, well…"
Sirius couldn't seem to think of a smart-aleck comment to make, so he merely stood there glaring. As the two men glared daggers at each other in silence, I stood there with my hand over my face in an exasperated way, while Remus stood there, stony-faced. Unable to think of anything to say, Sirius fixed the vase, stuffed the flowers back into it, and handed it to me. I took it with a word of thanks and motioned towards the kitchen.
"Let's eat, shall we?" I asked with a pained smile on my face.
The three men and I walked into the kitchen and they took their seats. I served them, trying desperately to start up a civilized conversation. I finally got Remus talking about his latest attempts at getting a job, and we all sat down and began to eat.
"I mean, it's not like I even have a record of attacking people!" Remus said thoughtfully as he took a sip of pumpkin juice.
"Well, it looks to me like they need a good biting," Sirius said, brandishing his fork, which had a bit of pork on the end of it, "That'd set 'em straight!"
"I don't think so," I said, then turned to Remus, "Why don't you work at Hogwarts? I'm sure Dumbledore would be more than happy to help you."
Remus looked thoughtful.
"You know, Lily, that's not a bad idea," he said slowly, "Maybe someday I'll give it a go."
Severus had been oddly quiet all evening, though he ate his food with a grim look on his face. He didn't join in as we discussed Remus, my pregnancy and when I was due, or even when we talked about Sirius' faults. ("You are a bit full of yourself," Remus observed.)
Happy, that I had made it through dinner without food being thrown, I stood up and waved my wand after everyone had finished eating. The plates all disappeared, as did the food.
"How about a friendly game of poker?" I suggested, conjuring a deck of cards out of nowhere.
"Excellent! I am the poker champion!" Sirius said, reaching out to deal the cards.
> > > > > >
I sat at the table, my eyes focused on my cards. In front of me was a decent-sized pile of poker chips. I wasn't winning, but I wasn't doing too poorly, either. Remus was in second place, and Sirius was in last place, looking rather glum with his two chips. Severus, on the other hand, was winning by a vast amount.
"I win, again," Severus said, placing his cards down face up and pulling the entire pile of chips towards him.
Sirius let out a groan and slapped his cards down on the table.
"He's got to be cheating!" Sirius said, "We said no legimency, Snivellus!"
Severus smirked behind his pile of chips. Remus checked his watch and yawned.
"Sirius and I have got to be going," Remus said, pushing his chips away and standing up, "Thanks for the potion, Lily."
"No problem," I replied, putting my cards down and standing as well, "It's been nice seeing you both!"
I gave each of them a hug in turn, and they left, Remus carrying the last of the potion in a jug. I waved the cards and chips away with a yawn, and plopped down into a chair next to Severus.
"That wasn't so bad, was it?" I asked.
"It could have been worse," Severus agreed, placing the tips of his fingers together.
"Cheers," I said cheerfully, standing up and pushing in my chair. "Oh, and by the way," I said, "I visited Dumbledore this morning. He thinks its best for you to stay here for the time being."
Severus said nothing in reply, but nodded, stood up, and pushed in his chair.
"In that case," he said, "Since I am quite well besides being a bit on the thin side, I think it best that you sleep in your room."
I raised a brow at him, "Are you sure?"
"Quite," he replied, "I shall be as discreet as possible during my stay."
With that, he turned on his heel and marched off to go to sleep. I chuckled to myself; men are so strange. Especially Severus, who doesn't seem to want to talk more than necessary.
It was at this point that I realized just how far I had come on the road of recovery since Severus arrived. My feelings for him were purely friendly, but he did something for me that cheerful Sirius couldn't do, nor could tired (yet friendly) Remus. I was not sure what it was, exactly, but it was there.
However, one thing I didn't realize was just how soon it would be before I saw Sirius and Remus again.
A/N: Mwuahaha…? That's all you get for tonight, seeing as I haven't written any more recently. The Chai thing, btw, was much like my first experience with a Vanilla Chai.
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