Here is Captain Falcon's chapter. If you have ideas for how to torture the characters, you're welcome to send them with your review, but just keep in mind the rating of this story. I'm not going to raise this story's rating just because of a comment that's not appropriate for a K plus story.

Now that I've said that, the disclaimer.

Disclaimer: Absolutely none of the characters belong to me!

There, the end of my babbling and the beginning of the chapter.

Captain Falcon was racing Falco since he had nothing else to do. Suddenly, Pichu rolled by in a wheelchair and handed Captain Falcon a note saying that Samus was waiting for him at an unfamiliar address. His hopes rose as he ran as fast as he could to the Know Your Smashers studio.

He walked in and searched for Samus. "Hello? Samus?" Captain Falcon asked as he wandered through the dreary studio. None of the lights were on, so he couldn't see a thing. Eventually he tripped over the legs of the chair on the stage. The lights immediately flashed on and the laughter of the announcer and the cameraman echoed through the studio.

"Hey! Samus isn't here!" he growled as he stood up and put the chair back in its correct position. He sat down and grumbled something about hurting his ankle.

"Well, aren't you a smart one?" mocked the cameraman sarcastically. "…Not! I've seen zucchini smarter than you! And zucchini aren't eve-"

"Shut up cameraman!" snapped an annoyed announcer. "Let me do my job. Ahem, know your smashers, know your smashers, know your smashers, know your smashers."

"Where am I?" Captain Falcon pondered aloud.

"You'll find out soon enough," the announcer informed him. "Captain Falcon…he is overly obsessed with cheesecake."

"Cheesecake? It's okay on occasion, but I don't eat it that often. What kind of idiot is overly obsessed with a food?"

"An insanely idiotic idiot," the announcer answered in a bored tone.

"Like you," finished the cameraman.

Captain Falcon didn't have an answer to that.

"Captain Falcon…he takes bubble baths with a rubber duck named Pookie."

"When I was five, yes, but I lost poor old Pookie…why am I telling you this?"

"Because you're an idiot. Nothing else can answer that."

Captain Falcon grunted as his face turned a light shade of red. The bright light would probably blind him sometime soon, so took out a pair of sunglasses that popped out of thin air and he put them on.

I wish I could do that, thought the cameraman.

"Captain Falcon…he has a secret Donkey Kong worship shrine in his room."

"That has got to be the worst insult yet," he snapped back, blushing a little harder. "Why would someone worship Donkey Kong?"

"Why would someone not?" wondered the cameraman. He pulled off his sweatshirt to reveal an auburn T-shirt with a picture of Donkey Kong on it. "I'm his biggest fan!"

Crickets chirped in the background while the announcer and Captain Falcon just wondered about the deranged cameraman.

"Okay…" murmured the announcer. "Captain Falcon…his muscles are part of his costume."

"No they're not! See?" He raised his arms and showed off his arms vainly while he flashed a cheesy grin.

"Yeah right, they're probably fake," the cameraman replied dully.

"They are real! I promise! Why does no one believe me?"

"We believe you…" said the announcer.

"Really?"

"…If you can lift this." The announcer pulled a lever, which made a 300-pound sphere drop from the ceiling. Captain Falcon shut his eyes and held his arms out, prepared to either foolishly injure himself or prove the cameraman and the announcer wrong.

Sadly, for him, the first one happened.

The heavy sphere weighed his body down to the ground and landed swiftly on his stomach. The cameraman laughed so hard, he almost choked.

"Someone…call an ambulance," Captain Falcon managed to say almost breathlessly before going unconscious.

An ambulance magicallyparked by the studio and two nurses came in with a stretcher. They hoisted the unconscious male onto the stretcher and took him away to a hospital.

The studio was quiet for a while as the cricket's chirping resumed.

Then the announcer concluded, "Now you know…Captain Falcon, the cheesecake-loving idiot with fake muscles and a Donkey Kong worship shrine."

"Hey, I'm the one with the worship shrine! I AM Donkey Kong's #1 fan! Someday I will meet him!" shouted the determined cameraman crazily.

The announcer sighed. "I don't get paid enough to have to work with him."

There, it's longer than the last one. Next I'll do Luigi's chapter, then…whoever is first requested by a reviewer.