HA! Nice cliffie, no?
Shame it really wasn't…
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It's a small miracle that Erik hadn't learned of what we were planning on. I mean, really, you'd think that he's be watching over the practices like a mama bear over her little babies, also known as cubs (yes, very scientific know) but surprisingly he stayed down in his lair. At least I hoped so.
I loved seeing the shocked look on Christine's face when I told her that we were going to switch roles. Her jaw dropped just a bit, and she looked at me like I was a crazy woman.
"What…? How could you do that without… him…knowing" She whispered the 'him' as though Erik was listening from behind her.
"We'll just make it look as though you are still Aminta, and I am still in the chorus."
She looked doubtful, but went along with it, and now, opening day, she looked positively scared senseless.
But no one was more scared than me.
Sure I know that I have a whole other life and junk, but still! Pretending you're a crazed lunatic's obsession isn't exactly the smartest move ever, I have to admit. But what the heck.
Although, Francois wasn't exactly happy about it. He was playing Raoul's role magnificently, making sure the police were there, and that he was just offstage. Raoul, of course, would be in box five, but he also made sure that the police were at their rightful posts, and not to shoot until positive that the Don Juan was indeed Erik.
By saying that they mean by getting the signal from me; they don't know the signal for I 'am not sure, but when I do give it, you will know.'
Basically saying I'm going to take over Christine's part and rip his mask off.
And now, only half an hour from the curtain call, I was almost ready to call it off, to say that I seriously didn't want to do this, but I was 'past the point of no return'. Christine hadn't learned her lines before she was switched, and there weren't any swings available to play my part.
It was either sink or swim, and I was going to pull this thing off.
Literally.
I sat in the chapel, where I accustomed to hanging out (hey, it's the only quiet place and pretty much the only people who actually came down to light a candle or pray was Christine, Madame Giry, and Isabelle, another dancer) and stared blankly at the opposite wall.
The little window seat with stained glass that painted the floor blues, reds, yellows and greens now let no color play across the stone floors, the sun had set, and only candles lit the room dimly. Other days I would have thought of it as romantic and spooky, like from a movie, but now I only watched the candle flame flicker this way and that in a draft coming from below the door.
It was some how hypnotizing, and I gazed dreamily at it, loosing track of time… but just as I was about to drift off into dream land, the heavy door opened with a bang.
"Fleur, come on! Show's in just twenty minutes, and you, not even in costume!" Madame Giry said, impatiently jerking me out of my stupor.
I was hurried through the dressing room, hastily putting on the rather skimpy costume, a dab of rouge, eye shadow, lip paint, then fix my hair back into a bun as to not draw attention to the blonde and un-curliness and I was good.
"Places!" Reyer cried, and the cast scurried to our rightful spots. I wouldn't be coming on for a few minutes, and I waited in the right wing with Francois.
The curtain drew up, and the orchestra broke out into the gawky first bars. I tried to avoid listening to the freakish lyrics and looked up into the flies.
Fly man, scenery, spare costume, black shape, more costu…
'Wait a moment' I thought rapidly as my eyes flashed back to the black shape. My stomach gave a lurch as I realized who it was…
Erik was here, waiting for his chance to attack his next prey… Piangi.
. My arm tingled unpleasantly as I remembered our last encounter.
"Fleur, are you alright?" Francois whispered in my ear.
I shuddered involuntary and nodded decisively. "Yes." I whispered back as I watched Erik leap down from the rafters behind the prop where Piangi had just disappeared though.
Francois gave me a quick kiss, and I nodded back. Reyer was giving my cue…
"No thoughts within her head but thoughts of joy… no dreams within her heart but dreams of… lo-o-o-o-ve." I sang out, my voice unnaturally calm. It was really quite intoxicating it was, knowing that every pair of eyes in the audience was looking at you.
I waited for 'Passarino' to say his next line, and break the moment's silence.
"Mastar?" Richard drawled in that weird tone of his. I braced myself to hear the most dreaded words…
"Passarino… go away, for the trap is set… and waits for its pre-e-e-y!" Erik had made his way to the stage, and I tried not to cringe. I heard Richard leave the stage, and now it was just Erik and I all alone, with a thousand eyes all following our movements.
"You have come here... in pursuit of your deepest urge…" My insides curdled and I robotically went through my part where I sat down 'gracefully' on the step "in pursuit of that wish, which till now, has been silent… silent… I have I have brought you, that our passions may fuse and merge - in your mind you've already succumbed to me dropped all defenses, completely succumbed to me…" He paused to take a breath and I looked away from the audience to turn my head, as if to block out the sound. Sadly, it didn't work.
"…now you are here with me: no second thoughts, you've decided, decided ..." He trailed off, and I slowly stood back up as Erik gave his cloak a little twirl and the orchestra swelled with the all-too-familiar seduction song.
"Past…the point of no return…" Erik was starting to walk towards me and I sensed rather than saw the dancers in the background enter and begin to perform. "…no backward glances: the games we've played 'til now, are at an end…."
Erik was an arms length away, on the outside I tried to look like I was slowly starting to fall for his charm but on the inside I felt like blowing chunks, screaming, and running away all at the same time. "Past all thought of "if" or "when" - no use resisting:" he was now circling me like a hawk…"abandon thought, and let the dream descend ... what raging fire" All of a sudden he sort of did this lunge/sweep to me, and I was now being held tightly in his arms.
I felt like yelling 'PERSONAL BUBBLE! FIVE FEET DISTANCE MINIMUM!'
"…shall flood the soul? What rich desire unlocks its door?" He ran his hands from my neck down to my hands and clutched them tightly in his own. I felt violated. "What sweet seduction lies before us ...?" He grasped my hand tighter and slowly led me backwards.
"Past the point of no return, the final threshold - what warm…" he let my hand go and I backed up in the direction of where I started. "…unspoken secrets will we learn? Beyond the point… of no… return..." I paused for a second, to make sure my voice was set to sound like Christine's, and began my part…
"You have brought me, to that moment where words run dry, to that moment where speech disappears into silence… silence ..." Ok, I had to admit, Don Juan WAS one of my favorite songs from Phantom of the Opera, and I was getting into my part, semi- enjoying getting to be Christine…
"I have come here, hardly knowing the reason why ... In my mind, I've already imagined our bodies entwining…" I paused for a moment. I felt dirty saying this. I cringed a little bit as I said the rest, but tried my best to look 'sexy' "…defenseless and silent - and now I am here with you: no second thoughts, I've decided…. decided ..."
Alright, I had to admit to myself. I was having fun. And the best part? Erik actually thought I was Christine! HA! Won't he be in for a surprise…?
"Past the point of no return - no going back now: our passion-play has now, at last, begun ..." I moved slowly toward the winding staircase prop and started to climb painstakingly slow up the steps…
"Past all thought of right or wrong - one final question: how long should we two wait, before we're one ...?" I almost choked on these words, but continued on.
"When will the blood begin to race? The sleeping bud burst into bloom? When will the flames, at last, consume us ...?" I almost laughed aloud when I saw the excitement on Erik's face.
Now we were on the top of the bridge prop thing, and were singing and coming towards each other…
"Past the point of no return… the final threshold - the bridge is crossed," We met each other and were holding each other's hips in a disgusting fashion, and he spun me around into him so that he held me at my stomach. "…so stand and watch it burn ... We've passed the point… of no…. re-tu-u-rn."
Now, more than ever, I wished longingly that I could just shove Erik off, seeing as now he was kinda violating my space, you know, my AHEM space by running his hands, erm, this way and that.
I felt repulsed, but what's a good actress if they can't mask their true feelings and put on a good show? And that actress was me. Had to be me actually…
For a moment Erik and I stood up there on the bridge, me feeling violated and him obviously thinking I was Christine.
I shut my eyes, wishing that Erik was really Francois…
Suddenly he sang his next lines, softly, but loud enough for the audience to hear.
"Say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime ... Lead me, save me from my solitude ... Say you want me with you, here beside you ..." I opened my eyes and turned around, with him gazing lovingly down at my hands.
"Anywhere you go let me go too – Christine, that's all I ask of ..."
The whole time he was singing he was looking down at my hands, as though savoring their feel (can someone say freak?) and I had had enough.
I cut him off mid word by jerking my hand out of his grip and ripping his mask off.
Before he had registered what happened I stepped back out of his reach, and tried to run down off the prop, but he had realized what happened right as I stepped back.
He let out a shout like an angry bull, and lunged forward for me.
I screamed as he grabbed my arm and yanked me back to where I remembered there was the stupid trapdoor.
All of this happened within just a span of ten seconds maybe, but it felt like an eternity as there were shouts of whether to fire or not, and other shouts of "Are you INSANE? You could shoot the girl!"
Erik had shoved me down the trapdoor and I felt my stomach lurch as I descended, screaming, to the depths of what surely must be Hell.
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Dun, dun, dun…
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