Chapter two: fluffy and cute

"Can't we just.. well... go away and let him kick the bucket?" Tai asked demandingly into the round of digidestined who discussed what to do about Myotismon now. That one meanwhile crouched in a corner, his chin on his knees and his arms wrapped around himself, swaying back and forward and mumbling to himself like someone in the closed ward of a lunatic asylum...

"I'm a good digimon... I'll have 'em back... I'm a good digimon... I'm a good digimon..." Sora looked away from this heap of misery and back to their friends.

"Of course not Tai! He's such a poor little helpless tot." Everyone recoiled.

"Well, I think we can let him stay with us for a while. What life-threatening could happen!" Joe seriously considered. Everyone recoiled. Mimi turned to Myotismon.

"You're not bad, are you Myo?" The vampire looked up with his big blue eyes full of tears and a facial expression like a pleading puppy.(all girls: aaawww!)

"Where are my bats? I can't sleep without my bats... I need something to cuddle… mommy..." His voice had a rather infantile touch.

"Oh cute! He thinks I'm his mommy! I'll get you something to cuddle, my sugar-cake!" Mimi chirped and ran away. Meanwhile Myo stuck his thumb into his mouth and started sucking on it.

"What's that with him?" Matt asked, slightly annoyed.

"I suppose the bereavement of something exceedingly essential for an individual may initiate a psychological traumata eminent enough to instigate a reversion onto a pre-pubescent stadium of evolution..." Joe mused when Myotismon started to weep heartbreaking. "Oh brilliant Joe, you made him blubber! By the way, can you translate that?" Tai nagged. Joe took his typical 'I'm sulky now'-face and turned away from Tai.

"It means the bat-boy's gone batty 'cos he lost his bats!" Matt uttered as suddenly everyone felt a stinging ache in their ears.

"What the 4k is this?" Tai screamed, distorting his face. He looked to Myotismon (as that one had always been the source of trouble) who seemed to be still crying though nothing was to be heard from him. "Highly frequent sound waves! We can't hear them but our hearing still registers them. Did you forget? He's a bat! That means up to 100 000 hertz." Izzy shouted back at him as all covered their ears. Their luck that Mimi had currently returned with really cute, fluffy white bunnies.

"Here Myo, tell me if you need something else, my pretty." She said patting Myotismon's blonde head. He merrily clasped the bunnies and smooched with them.

"So what now? Do we sit here and play sitter for this overgrown urchin? I think we should hack into the WWF's program and free his bats before he'll need to be swaddled." Everyone agreed into Izzy's plan, beside of Kari. (Tai fainted...) "You shouldn't talk about him in that way. He's a big boy... Though terribly cute because he's so helpless and weak like a little newborn bunny… Speaking of bunnies… where're those?" Everyone looked at Myotismon who still sat in his corner with innocent eyes.

"Myo my little pale blue cookie, where are your little bunnies?" Mimi asked with a voice that oozed of friendliness.

"Hopped away…" Motismon answered mournful… ( wiping blood from the corner of his mouth and hiding something fluffy and white, with crushed napes, behind his back.)

"Oh that's so sad Myotismon… Shall I snuggle you?" Kari suddenly proposed. That was too much for Gatomon.

"Now what the hell is going on here? Why are you all so friendly to him? Did you forget? He killed my sex-toy—uhm… ° - I mean my good friend Wizardmon! And tried to kill us all, more then once!" The little cat pouted.

"You're just jealous because he would never cuddle you, pussy-cat!" Mimi scoffed, lying in Myotismon's arms next to Kari and Sora.

"What! I'd never let myself being cuddled by that goat-rapist! He's a wanker!" Gatomon shouted, trying to drag Kari out of the vampire's arms.

"Now now, Gatomon why so offensive. Don't you believe they could like me because I'm a nice 'mon?" Myotismon whispered, slowly regaining his more adult composure. (thanks to the "bunny-carnage")

"Never! They're just with you because of your---"

"Charming personality?"

"No!"

"Sonorous voice?"

"No!"

"Breathtaking blue eyes?"

"No!"

"Sexual attraction?"

"NO!"

"Opaque, misapprehended soul?

"What? NO!"

"My incredible nimbleness between the sheets?" (spoiled grin by Myotismon and the authoress)

"… Gatomon digivolve to Angewomon!"

"Whoah!"

"Meow! Proof that last argument! Purr!" Angewomon sneaked closer to Myo while the girls glared at her.

"Sorry, but this fanfiction is not rated high enough. But you can ask the authoress for a private version…" Angewomon disenchanted de-digivolved back onto champion level, while Myotismon was still grinning in a very spoiled way. (like the authoress when she draws Myo-yaoi-pics!)

"Kari! Now get away from that jerk!" Tai shouted at her. "Mimi, Sora! Leave him! He's a monster!" But the girls only clasped him tighter. "Don't dare speaking like this of our noble master Myotismon!" They squeaked. The boys gaped in shock. Myotismon interfered.

"Well technically he's right… I'm a digital monster, my loves!"

"Get away from him, Kari, or I'll tell Mum and Dad!" Tai begged his little sister.

"Oh your parents confess being your parents!" Myotismon scoffed at him. "Oh that was rude… I ought to say I'm sorry… Nah!"

Tai's jaw flapped open. "Hey! You should be quiet you Grisly-Wing-impotent bastard." That hit a sore spot. The vampire was sulky. "Come on my brides. We're not wanted here! Let us leave this uncomfortable place." He said wrapping his cape around Sora, Kari and Mimi. The five boys ran towards him. "Since when are they your brides you pedophilic polygamist?" Myotismon laughed maniacally. "Since most of the famous vampires have three brides!" With that he and the girls vanished into thin air. The eighth digimon and the boys gaped at the empty area.

"Brilliant! And what are we going to do now?" Joe muttered. "Keeping to my original plan and then exchange Myotismon's bats for our girls…" Izzy supposed.