Disclaimer and Warning applies to all chapters.

I just want something I can never have
in this place it seems like such a shame
though it all looks different now, I know
it's still the same
everywhere I look you're all I see
just a fading fucking reminder
of who I used to be
Nine Inch Nails (Something I Can Never Have)

Maybe Doesn't Mean That Much

0-0-0

"Keiko-chan, Keiko-chan!" Kurama shouted the name as many times as repetition would allow, but the call, however, was on deft ears. They had looked high and low, up and down, right and left, but still, no sign of the heartbroken girl. It weighed so heavily upon Kurama's mind that he thought it would consume him until nothing was left, and he was only left to wonder if that was what Yuusuke was feeling.

Or, perhaps by the frantic glaze in his eyes, Yuusuke was far, far worse.

"Hey Urameshi! I think I might'uh found her!" Kuwabara's unsteady voice rose above the crowd in the busy street, and for that, Kurama was very thankful. Yuusuke squinted, and finally made out the bulky form of Kuwabara through the throngs of people, running as fast as his feet would take him, then. Kurama wasn't far after.

"Then get your ass moving, Kuwabara! Time, time, time!"

Kurama fought off a grin, but he chided himself and followed suit. After a few winding turns and paths, Kuwabara had led them to a seemingly deserted park, with a single bench in view. And on that bench just happened to be Keiko Yukimura, who had a tear stained face and a mound of tissues stuffed in her delicate looking hands.

"Keiko!" Yuusuke shrieked, and barely missed tackling the poor girl. His hands immediately curled around hers in a desperate lock, face slightly less anguished, now traced with relief.

"What the hell were you thinking! Just taking off like that, give someone--"

"Yuusuke," her soft voice interrupted, and Yuusuke shut his mouth obediently. Her expression was stern, but barely controlled, which left no room for argument. "I-I'm sorry I made you worry," she whispered, biting her lip.

"Nah, no way Keiko. It's fine! Just, I was so worried you'd. . . well, you know. And I can't let that happen."

She smiled a broken smile, and they embraced.

Kurama watched this with a frown, and closed his eyes. Something was very lost between them, and he knew they'd never be quite the same. He turned, and walked away slowly, pulling Kuwabara with him.

"Let us not intrude. They need their time, you understand," he said quietly when the pair was out of ear shot. Kuwabara nodded, all the happiness apparently drained from his face.

Kurama looked to the trees, and saw a faded black blur. His heart clenched painfully, and he longed to be with the fire demon dreadfully. He glanced at Kuwabara suddenly, who was already smiling back at him with a knowing look. "Would you--" the redhead started,

"Go ahead, Kurama. He needs to know what happened anyway. Little shrimp is kinda late on this stuff, eh?"

Kurama nodded with a smile, and drifted toward the trees, leaning against one casually as he scoped out the ningen's, and when the coast was clear, jumped up. He met confused, dull ruby eyes.

"What's happened Kurama? What's wrong with the ningen and the detective?"

Kurama didn't answer.

"Kurama?" Hiei questioned suspiciously. "You are not yourself. Something has--"

Before the demon could finish, Kurama scooped him up and hugged him as tight as he could, breathing in the familiar scent he loved so.

"My Hiei, this is not a good time, probably one of the worst we've had to face. Keiko-chan. . . has lost her child. And Yuusuke is very much distrout."

Hiei's round eyes widened, and his arms tightened around Kurama's neck. "You. . . you're crying Kurama." The tears slid down the Forbidden Child's face, and he soon recognized them to be his own, hardening into dark gems as they fell. He glared at nothing, biting his lip.

"Why am I so weak when this happens? Damnit!"

"You're not weak Hiei. Expressing emotion is normal, and even the strongest must cry at times. Do not be afraid of showing what you feel." Kurama touched the black tear drops, noticing their unmistakable beauty. "Beautiful," he whispered.

Shaking his head, Hiei dropped from Kurama's embrace. "I have never seen them."

Kurama held one up, and Hiei touched it gently, marveling its shiny exterior. Kurama smiled, and took his chin, bringing their mouthes together in a sweet kiss, sharing their pain through connection.

The fox found his mouth moving as he pulled away, of words that he thought he'd never say, and before he could retract them, Hiei's frightened, terrified expression reached out and destroyed his heart.

"I love you."

And it was all over before it had a chance to begin. Everything seemed to stop as Hiei shook his head and lept away, too silent and horrified to do anything else.

Kurama stood there, and hated himself.

My Hiei, how you've been hurt. . .

0-0-0

It had been five of the single most lonely days Kurama had experienced, but also five of the most busy. Comforting people had its wear and tear on you, as well. He found himself at Yuusuke's more than he had ever been, and now he knew what color coffee mug Yuusuke used in the morning, or what size towel to put in the bathroom.

The Spirit Detective was so devoted to the bedridden Keiko, that the rest of the house was left completely un-attended to, and Kurama took it upon himself to keep it at least presentable while Kuwabara and Shizuru took care of keeping the two fed properly, and clean.

While Hiei. . .

Hiei was no where to be found. And not a day passed that Kurama didn't long for his return, or to take both those terrible words that just came out of their own accord.

But then again. . .

They were true, were they not?

As Kurama scrubbed the sink, he couldn't stop a snarl.

If you only come for useless advice, then you shall go back to were you came. I am not in any need of you, Youko. You won't even explain as to how we can talk this way, so do not bother me further.

He resumed his work, silent.

Ah but I have only now decided to tell you. I can tap into your subconscious when you're deep in thought. Being apart of you is very useful, I must say. Do you understand now, you spoiled child?

That hit a nerve.

And why are you only now doing it, you pathetic excuse for a--"

"Kurama, what are you. . . are you talking to yourself?"

Kuwabara's confused face met his, and he fought a blush forming on his cheeks. He cursed Youko a thousand times before he smiled politely and shook his head. "Of-of course not Kuwabara. You must have been imagining it."

With a shrug Kuwabra opened the refrigerator ad took a carton of milk back the way he came, humming softly. Kurama sighed.

He thinks me to be crazy now.

Tch. That is not a hard thing to perceive about you.

Kurama shook his head and simply ignored that snide little comment. He went to the window and pushed it up, fresh air assaulting his nostrils pleasantly.

He nearly screamed when two round eyes blinked at him in return.

"H-Hiei?"

"The only one you know. Where is the detective?" Cold, and barely formal.

Kurama expected the tone, but it still hurt terribly.

"In the bedroom." His mouth wouldn't allow him to speak further, or his ego. A game was what this was, and he'd win if he'd have to die because of it.

Hiei walked past him, stoned faced. Kurama took with vengeance, because he would not crack. Not this time. If Hiei cared, he would have to break the ice this time for Kurama's affectionate mistake.

But Kurama gasped when he turned around, and faced no reflection in the shine of the mirror on the wall. His eyes were wide and confused, and he decided he have to investigate tomorrow.

It was just too strange to ignore.

-

TBC...

So any ideas on what's wrong with our favorite fox?

Let this be known that I will never abandon this story, for it is my love to write! Seriously, it's so interesting to see how it comes undone and I simply love it.

Maybe I should have warned for the angst, but oh well.