Chapter Nine

Green eyes fluttered open, and Alicia groaned as she stretched. She frowned for a moment when her arm hit the back of the couch, and the tears returned when she realized why she was sleeping on the sofa in the living room, instead of her own bed. It was the closest she could get to Blue Fire, now that the woman had gone.

Wolf sidled up beside her, and licked her cheek, whining slightly.

"Oh, Wolf," said the blonde, hugging him to her, burying her face in his soft white fur. "You miss her, too, don't you? I hope she's okay," she added, and her mind drifted back to the tall Indian warrior woman. The memory of the woman was never very far from the rancher's thoughts.

Shaking her head to clear her mind, Alicia knew she had to get up - she had things she needed to do. But nothing seemed the same without the presence of her Indian friend. Sighing, she resigned herself to a few more minutes of reminiscing, before forcing herself to her feet.

The tall Indian tried hard to focus on the task at hand - sewing a warm jacket, as it was - but it was hard to concentrate. She found herself drifting off, thinking of Alicia, and when she did that, her hands stilled. She'd get nothing done at this rate.

It had been a shock for the woman to wake up in strange surroundings. Robyn had found a sturdy tree to rest in, and fell asleep quite comfortably, but upon awakening, it was on the tip of her tongue to call for Alicia when she didn't see her anywhere nearby.

And then it came to her - Alicia was safe in her own house. It was she who had left. Though she wished she hadn't, she'd give anything to still be there with the blonde, Blue Fire knew it was better this way. She would find a way to keep an eye on the rancher, secretively, so she'd still be able to keep the young woman safe, if she needed to.

When her stomach growled, bringing her back from her thoughts, the tall woman leapt down from the tree, and secured everything in her bag. Breakfast was in order, and then perhaps a trip to see her mother, since she was so close. Cooking anything was out of the question, as Robyn could still hear the white man's posse searching for her, so smoke wouldn't help her any.

Looks like I'll be eating some of the food Alicia packed for me sooner than I thought, she realized, suddenly very glad the woman had been so persistent. Munching on dried meat strips and an apple, the Indian made her way through the woods to the Apache camp, intent on finding her mother.

"Maybe I could sleep there a few days," she wondered aloud, to herself. "Sleeping in a tree is different than sleeping on Alicia's couch." Stretching her back and massaging sore muscles, Robyn continued on her way.

Pleased with her progress, Blue Fire made good time to the Apache land, and soon slowed her step, making sure it was clear for her to enter. Glancing around cautiously, she crept over to her mother's kowa, and froze when she heard talking coming from within the hut.

The first voice, which she quickly recognized as her mother's, was angry but controlled. "You know what you did to my daughter was not right," Feather in the Wind told her visitor. "My only child is no longer with me because of you and your selfish ways. There is no reason for me to allow you to remain here with me."

"I just want to know if I can have her things!" cried the second person, and the Indian's eyes narrowed dangerously as she realized it was Small Fox. "I mean, she's not coming back, and she didn't take it last time she was here. Why won't you give it to me?"

Blue Fire knew her mother had probably taken her things into her own hut for safe keeping while she was gone. She had numerous furs, a few pieces of jewelry, and some more material for clothes and weapons that she had not carried with her before. Now, if she heard correctly, Small Fox was demanding her right to own the items, while her mother was not giving in.

"They are not yours to have, Small Fox! They belong to my daughter, and as long as she walks this land, they belong only to her. You have no claim to these things," replied the older woman, sternly. "Leave my hut. Now, child!"

Reluctantly getting to her feet, sparing the old woman a hard glare, the girl exited the wickiup with anger, letting the flap drop behind her.

Barely restraining herself from going after the teen, Robyn entered soon after Small Fox was out of sight.

"I thought I told you to leave!" came the angry retort, as Feather in the Wind heard the girl enter her room again, having her back turned as she adjusted her only child's various belongings.

"I will go if you wish, mother, but I hope you were speaking to Small Fox," said Blue Fire, gently, as she knelt in respect, and her mother spun around immediately.

Her eyes showed delighted surprise. "Oh, my daughter!" she smiled, embracing her little girl in a firm hug, practically dragging the woman to her feet. "You are correct, I was having a conversation with Small Fox just moments earlier. She wanted the furs you had left behind, but I would not give them to her."

"I thank you," said Robyn, sincerely. "I will take them with me when I go this time, so as not to leave you with the burden. Enough of this; have you been well, mother?"

The older woman smiled, her dark-skinned face wrinkling lightly as she did so. "I have," she said, "for the grace of this year's harvest. But you, my child, you seem sad. What troubles you? Did something happen to your Alicia?"

Blue Fire sighed, and sat down cross-legged, with her head in her hands. "Not in so many words, but yes, I suppose you could say that," she responded, and her mother took her place by her side, ready to listen.

"What has happened?"

Taking a deep breath, Robyn told her mother all about the things that had been going on, from Daniel to Brian to the poisoned feed, and everything in between.

"She did not want me to go, and I did not want to leave, but I had to, for her to be safe," explained the tall Indian. "Wolf is with her, so I know he will help protect her, but I still want to be with her. I love you, mother, but I do wish I was with Alicia instead of here. I miss her," she admitted.

Yes, and it's only been a day. What am I going to do a month from now? she wondered, and pushed the thought away before she could come up with an answer.

"I understand, Dotth'izh ko'," said her mother, knowingly. "When you leave here, perhaps you could stay in the forest, since you are well with the tress anyhow, and watch your Alicia from there. That would work?"

Blue Fire nodded. "It may," she agreed, quietly. "But it is still not the same." She bit her lip as she decided to continue. "I was leaving, and I still could not tell her that I love her. She does not know that I cannot think because she is not near me, she does not know that I wanted to call for her early this day when I did not sense her nearby, and she does not know how I want to her hold her and never leave again. She does not know any of these things, mother. All because I was too scared to tell her," uttered the Indian, a tear making its way down her cheek.

Feather in the Wind loving stroked her daughter's cheek, encouraging her to stretch out, cradling her child's head gently on her lap. "My child, it is not rare for you to feel lonely and hurt when you are without your love, but you will get through this," she assured her. "You will be with your Alicia again, I know it, and you will be happy once more. I understand that you are scared, but when you go back to her, you must trust in your heart and tell her how you feel."

The tall woman, her sobs ebbing, nodded without conviction as she closed her eyes. "I will try," she said, lowly. "Until then, I will stay here, if I may. Maybe only a few days, and then I will remain in the forest, so I won't cause any trouble for you."

Her mother smiled, glad to have her daughter back home, even if only for a little while. "You are always welcome in my home, Blue Fire, you know this. For as long as you'd like. Rest now, you have traveled long, and your heart is more tired than your body." Knowing that to be true, Blue Fire did as she was told, and was soon resting peacefully with her mother never more than a few feet away.

A week after Blue Fire had left, Alicia was still feeling as though she was missing something. Without the Indian nearby, the loneliness of her property became apparent, and the blonde wished for nothing more than to see the tall woman again. If she did, Alicia knew she'd probably rush into her arms, professing her love and begging Robyn not to leave ever again; her heart was too empty to do otherwise.

While part of her worried about Blue Fire's response, another part felt deep down that the Indian shared the same feelings. All she wanted was to be with the woman again, as she missed her terribly - more than she thought was possible.

The weather was beginning to cool down a bit, and the blonde rancher began placing the winter blankets over her horses in the evenings, to help keep them warm. Winter Escape was one of her best places to seek consolation, because the large horse seemed to miss Blue Fire as much as the small woman. The two spent a lot of time together, even if it was just a few minutes in the morning when Alicia groomed the Palomino.

A whinny shook her from her thoughts, and Alicia glanced up, finding herself face-to-face with an impatient stallion.

"Goodness, Thunder, you'd think you were hungry or something," she laughed, patting the horse's thick neck lovingly, before distributing the hay among the equines, just as the sun began its descent behind the hills. Feeling the chill, the rancher covered her horses with their blankets, and then made her way into the house, Wolf never more than a couple of steps behind, the faithful animal following her wherever she went. His mistress had given him a job to protect the small blonde, and he would obey it to the end.

"Come, Wolf," she urged, holding the door open for him. "Let's get some dinner in our bellies, and then call it a night. What do you say?" The wolf yipped his agreement, walked inside the warm house, and promptly laid down beside the couch. For the first couple of days after Robyn's departure, Alicia noticed the wolf refused to leave the foot of the sofa, and often whined as if waiting for the woman to return, giving him more than just a scent to live with.

Now, however, he kept guard only when both he and Alicia were in the house, and only until she went to bed - he had begun to sleep either on the floor next to the blonde's bed, or right beside her in her very bed, depending on how low he sensed her heart was feeling.

Curling up on the floor until she called him for dinner, the growing wolf scampered into the kitchen, finishing his food well before Alicia, waiting patiently for the small blonde. Alicia was glad, in a way, that Blue Fire had left the animal in her care, but he only served to remind her more of the Indian she dearly missed.

"Why couldn't I tell her?" she asked herself, aloud, as Wolf cocked his head at her, curious. "She left, and I probably won't see her again for a long time, and she doesn't even know how I feel about her. I don't know when I fell in love with her, Wolf, but I did. I don't care what anyone would say about her being here; let them try to lay a hand on her.

"I just want her back," the rancher sighed, heavily, her heart going out to the tall woman she loved, praying she was safe. Shaking her head to clear her thoughts, she cleared the table that seemed all too empty set for only one, and snapped her fingers.

"Come on, Wolf. Bedtime," she hinted, and the white wolf followed her into her bedroom, climbing up by her side as she slid under the covers, laying his muzzle gently on her shoulder.

Taking her mother's advice, Blue Fire headed into the forest after a little more than a week under Feather in the Wind's care and guidance. The older woman had suggested a vision quest, and while Robyn figured it would help her clear her mind, she already knew what she needed to do - she needed to go back to Alicia, but couldn't.

If I didn't love her so much, I would be back there with her right now. The words she'd admitted to her mother just a few days before echoed in her ears. It was true, no matter how strange it sounded. If she loved Alicia any less, she'd be back at the ranch with her immediately.

But, she knew her presence put the blonde rancher in danger, and so forced herself to remain out of sight. To love someone enough to stay away… she didn't like it, but knew she didn't have much of a choice.

Sighing, the tall woman adjusted the leather pack on her back, having taken her things from her mother's hut as she had promised. She now had enough material for another jacket, which she planned on making for Alicia for when the cool nights came during the time of the ghost face, a tomahawk, and practically anything else she had a desire to fashion.

What's more, she had plenty to keep her busy, as she had no doubt if she let her mind wander, she'd end up thinking about Alicia, and just missing her all over again.

Taking a deep breath, she scaled a tree and got ready to make herself a tomahawk. She was far enough away from Alicia's so as not to be noticed by the blonde, and yet close enough to observe anyone coming or going. Also, within seconds, she could run even closer to the property, and get a better look, all without being discovered.

She was satisfied with her position, and set to work on a tomahawk, having finished the jacket for Alicia during her stay with her mother. To her delight, she had not been found in the camp, and had enjoyed a peaceful visit with her mother. The two talked often late into the evening, catching up on everything, and simply being around each other, for the time they were together was all too scarce for either woman.

Clearing her thoughts, Blue Fire began by smoothing out the wood that would be the handle of her weapon, knowing she didn't really need it, it was just a task to keep her mind occupied while her heart yearned for a certain blonde rancher.

Robyn passed many days in the same fashion, taking a break from her work only to hunt or stretch her legs, and soon held a beautifully crafted tomahawk in her hands. The stone blade was extremely sharp, and polished to a gentle shine, tied tightly onto the wood with a strip of strong leather.

The next task was sewing a small loop onto the side of her deerskin trousers, so she'd have a place to keep her newest form of defense. Remembering idly why she chose to be a warrior, as she sucked the blood from her fingertip for the fourth time, she lifted her head when the familiar sound of Alicia's laughter somehow drifted to her ears.

With a slight frown, she leapt down from the tree, and made her way closer to the ranch. It was already dusk; what was going on? As she got closer, the Indian was able to hear the woman talking.

"I'm sure you'll dance just fine, Jake," the blonde assured her friend, walking out the door with her hand on his arm. She wore a gorgeous full-length emerald dress with a low v-cut, complete with white gloves that went up to her elbows, and, of course, matching shoes.

"Only if you promise to dance with me," the man bargained, and when Alicia accepted, the tall Indian retreated back into the woods, unable to stand anymore.

Alicia sighed as she got ready for the annual Fall Dance that the town held every year. Normally, she didn't go, because she had too much to do, but this year, she decided she needed to get her mind off a certain dark-haired Apache warrior she was missing.

So, when Jake had offered an invitation, she accepted, to his pleasant surprise. Currently, the woman was ready to go, except for one thing, which she stood, staring at, in front of the mirror in her bedroom.

Jade earrings, to match the lovely green dress she was wearing.

The jade earrings that had been given to her as a birthday gift.

By Blue Fire.

Could she wear them? And survive the night? Without breaking down into tears? She wasn't sure; all she knew was she wasn't about to go without them. Gathering her courage, she reached out with her hand, and watched as she picked up them up, placing the jewelry softly in her palm. She looked at them, remembering the Indian with fond memories, before quickly slipping them in her ears.

Just then, there was a knock on the door, and Wolf greeted whoever it was with a low growl.

Hushing the animal, Alicia opened the door, and smiled warmly at her friend, who was dressed gallantly in a tuxedo.

"How nice," she commented, closing the door behind her.

"You won't be saying that when you find out I can't dance," the man warned her, to her amusement.

"I'm sure you'll dance just fine, Jake," she assured him, gently, taking his arm when it was offered. The two chatted amiably as Jake helped her into his wagon, and they were off to the dance, as, unbeknownst to Alicia, a tall Indian's heart was breaking.

Robyn sighed heavily as she leaned back against the branch of the tree, staring up at the sky. She thought back to a time, not so long ago, when she and Alicia had done a little stargazing of their own…

Alicia was sure the Indian had to be crazy - just why were they up on her roof again? Oh, yeah… the woman had this insane fear of the night. No, not the dark, just being out alone in the middle of the night.

"Why are your people afraid of being alone at night, Blue Fire?" asked Alicia, as she and the Indian sat surprisingly comfortably on the roof of her house, staring up at the dark night sky, trying to figure out a way to help her friend overcome her fear, which had made itself known when Robyn had refused to finish up the fence on her own if it meant working past the setting of the sun.

Blue Fire sighed. "Alicia, bad things happen when we are alone, and there is even more danger at night," she explained. "That is why the Apache usually do things in groups; hunting, sewing, cooking, and even tribal councils."

The blonde nodded. "So, it's basically because you feel alone, and kind of vulnerable?" The Indian confirmed this with a slight incline of her head. "Blue Fire, did you ever look up at the sky when you were in the Apache camp?"

"Yes," replied the woman, not sure where the sudden question came from.

"And did you see the stars there?"

"Yes."

"Do you see the stars now, above my house?"

Blue Fire frowned. "Yes," she said, tentatively.

Alicia continued. "The stars you see here are the same stars you see anywhere, Robyn - we are all under one sky. Everyone sees the same sky at night. So, in a way, we are never truly alone," she concluded, and the Indian paused for a moment to absorb the rancher's meaning.

"When I look at the stars, somewhere, you are also seeing them?"

The blonde smiled. "That's right," she confirmed.

"Thank you," the Indian said, at last. "I understand."

"The same sky," whispered Blue Fire, before closing her eyes, trying hard to block out the image of Alicia and Jake together as she slept.

When more than a month had passed, with Blue Fire keeping careful watch over Alicia as best she could as often as she could, the tall Indian decided it was time to move on for a while. Even if it was just a visit to her mother's again, she needed to get away - seeing Jake at the ranch almost twice a week was beginning to make her stomach churn. She didn't trust the man, anymore than she did Brian, and finding him constantly around Alicia and her property had her unnerved beyond belief.

She had to leave, before he ended up with a tomahawk in his chest, and each time he would touch Alicia, he came one step closer to death by the woman's hands.

Shaking off the anger, or attempting to, Robyn made her way through the forest once more, planning on staying with her mother until the time of the ghost face and the possible snow had passed.

The woman knew Feather in the Wind would be happy to have her stay, and she'd at least have a warm spot to sleep when the cold nights and often rainy days came through. Praying to her Spirit Guide to watch over Alicia while she was gone, Blue Fire headed off towards Apache land once more, having finished with all of her sewing and crafting needs for a while.

Blue Fire's plan worked, partially. She did indeed have a place to stay during the cold season, and it kept her from killing Jake, but it did nothing to heal the pain in her heart from longing to be with Alicia, which only grew with each passing day.

In fact, not being able to be with the blonde took its toll on the Indian's physical health, as well. It wasn't more than two weeks into her stay with her mother, that she became ill. Feather in the Wind tended to her for many days, nursing a high fever, bad dreams, and a harsh cough.

During Blue Fire's worst days, in which she would scarcely open her eyes, Alicia noticed that Wolf became very agitated. The normally calm and well-behaved animal started scratching at the door, whining as if to be let out, but refusing to go outside when Alicia opened the door for him.

He was torn between the pain he felt from his mistress, and his order to remain with the small blonde.

By the third day, the rancher was sure she knew what was wrong: Blue Fire's connection with her Spirit Guide allowed the animal to know when the woman was hurt. That realization didn't do anything to decrease her worry for the Indian.

"I wish I could be there with her, Wolf," she admitted, as the wolf curled up beside her, having forced himself to stay with Alicia, rather than run through the woods to find his mistress. "I miss her so much."

Eventually, after more than a week of being sick in bed, Blue Fire was healed. She still felt a little weak, but her mother seemed pleased with her recovery.

"My daughter, you cannot remain like this," Feather in the Wind told her one day, after their morning meal.

Blue Fire glanced up at the woman. "Mother?" she asked, confused.

"You miss your Alicia," the older woman stated. "Your body may be healed, but your heart is still sick. Go back into the forest, where you can watch over her again, my child. When you can, you must return to her, and let her heal your soul.

"For what your soul needs, no other can give you."

So, upon her mother's insistence, since Feather in the Wind was afraid her daughter had become too down for any one person to handle, Robyn gave her mother a strong and grateful hug, and started back through the forest, on her way to Escape Ranch.

Halfway there, something inside her heart told her to take a little side-trip. Not quite understanding where the sudden need came from, she was still arguing with herself whether or not to give in, when her feet began moving of their own accord, taking the Indian where she felt she was being pulled.

She walked just a quarter of a mile to the east, judging by the sun's position in the late morning sky, and looked around when she found nothing. Raising a dark eyebrow at her own actions, she was about to turn back, when, out of the corner of her eye, she noticed something lying on the ground.

The Indian frowned a little as she silently approached the form. There was something familiar about the shape…

"Wolf!" she cried, when the animal sprang to his feet, and gingerly licked her hand. "What are you doing out here?" She examined him for injuries, and was shocked to find blood, but not a single wound.

Now she searched more closely, trying to figure out if the wolf had killed an animal, or if there was some other reason his fur was sticky with blood. Wolf took a bit of her pant leg in his teeth, tugging her towards something. Willingly, the Indian followed the large wolf through the dense forest, going deeper into the woods until she wondered if even Wolf knew where he was going, when the urgent journey came to a stop. The tall woman's blue eyes widened at what the animal showed her - it was a body!

The person was lying on their back, arms and legs sprawled out, similar to what Blue Fire knew as "spread eagle". Dried blood covered the arms, thighs, and even the chest and shoulders. Whoever it was had been brutally attacked, the face beaten nearly beyond recognition.

But there was no mistaking the beaded warrior's necklace that was tauntingly reflected in the pale moonlight.

"Oh, Alicia," moaned the woman, sinking to her knees. With a trembling hand, she stroked the blood encrusted blonde hair, tears falling freely as she leaned down, praying to feel the woman's breath on her face.

Nothing.

Next, she placed her fingers against the side of the tortured rancher's neck, choking back a sob when she felt a faint beating under her skin. The woman was alive, but for how much longer?

Gingerly, as carefully as she could, Blue Fire picked the woman up into her arms, and began walking towards the ranch. Taking it one step at a time, cradling Alicia in her strong embrace, the Indian made her way into the house, a mourning wolf on her heels.

Setting Alicia gently on her bed, Blue Fire went to work. First, she knew she had to wash all the dried blood away, to find out where the injuries were and what she could do about them. With a wet cloth, she removed the old blood from the woman's face, neck, arms, and legs.

The tall woman felt her heart constrict when she realized that while Alicia had lost a lot of blood, the substance was still flowing in a few places, such as her battered face and between her legs. Blue Fire knew what that meant, and her heart sank into the very pit of her stomach. The fact that the woman was already nude only enforced her deduction - the small blonde had been raped.

Her knuckles turned white with rage at the idea. The blood red mark across the necklace, crossing out the center stone and therefore Blue Fire herself, proved that it was the work of the Apache. Blue Fire had no doubt the Indians asked Alicia some questions, trying to figure out where the Indian was hiding, and knew the blonde wouldn't tell them. She'd protect her at all costs, even if it meant her own life.

My own people would rape an innocent white woman, knowing the consequences it could cause, because of me… They would rather disgrace her for not only her own people, but me as well. And all because she decided to show me kindness…

Shaking her head, the Indian turned back to the task at hand, trying to clear her mind of the anger, knowing a clouded mind would be no good to her sick love.

After washing away the blood, and stopping the continuing flow, she set to work on cleaning each wound, and sewing those that needed it. One gash on her cheek, a small cut on her temple, a nice-sized laceration on her upper arm, and a few on the woman's lower legs required stitches, much to Blue Fire's dismay.

Once that was done, the Indian bandaged the woman's injuries, that included setting a fractured forearm, and dumped the water in her small bowl again. She'd filled a bowl with water to keep her cloth clean, but was emptying the reddish water for the third time.

What worried the woman the most, was that, through it all, Alicia hadn't made a single sound. Not a word, not a groan, not a single movement at all. Even though Blue Fire didn't want to hurt her, she would have been happier if Alicia had cried out in pain - at least then she'd have known the blonde was okay.

But she only slept. The beaten woman's breathing was shallow at best, but it was there - although the Indian couldn't feel it, she saw the minute rise and fall of the blonde's torn chest.

"Please, Alicia," begged the Indian, sitting by the woman's side, taking the small, frail hand into her own. "I've done all I can for you right now, it's up to you to get better. Please, you must get better."

The Indian couldn't imagine what she'd do if Alicia didn't get well. Leaving the young woman had been the hardest thing she'd ever had to do, even though she knew it was for the blonde's own safety. And watching her from a distance did nothing for the emptiness her heart felt, did nothing about the strong urge she had to just sweep the woman into her arms and never let go.

But all that changed now. Before, there was just a matter of time, until the Apache and the white men stopped looking, and the Indian could return safely to the Ranch. Things would be back to normal.

Now, Blue Fire stood a chance of losing the woman she loved forever, and knew she'd never been so scared in all her life.

The Indian awoke with a jerk, and glanced around the room, trying to find out what was going on through the darkness. "It was a dream," she sighed, smiling a little. Feeling the cloth in her hand, she brought it closer to the small flame of the candle, and felt her breathing hitch.

The rag was covered in blood. That was no dream - a small, loving, dying rancher lay in the bed, just next to the chair Blue Fire was seated on. Everything was real. Her worst nightmare became a reality in a matter of moments.

Checking the blonde's bandages, she held the woman's hand, and spoke soothingly to her until she fell asleep herself, holding the delicate palm securely in her own.