10: Defeat Is Not An Option

"I should be the one to apologize to you, Saber, for what I'm going to do to you right now. I guess you'll never forgive me."

Irisviel shivered, feeling an electric-like impulse coming from the barrier around the castle.

"Saber is back!" Illya shouted with excitement. They were sitting together on her bed in a newly prepared room, resting after a hard night. The girl was truly happy, but a wide smile vanished from her face after a long while of waiting. "Why didn't he come to see me? Is he angry because I caused so much troubles?"

Iri gently caressed her daughter's hair, thinking. It was really unusual for Siegfried to avoid them like this, there must be a serious reason.

"Illya, I can't even imagine Saber being angry at you. It's just not possible."

"Then why?"

"Because you need rest, Sweetie. You'll see him when you wake up."

"But…"

"No, Illya. Later." Irisviel smiled, kissed the girl goodnight and left the room to investigate the situation.

There was something disturbing on the corridor - a barely noticeable smell of blood. Iri knew what it means, but still wondered how it's even possible for a ghost to smell like that.

"Saber?" It was not really a question, to be honest. "Are you ok? Why are you hiding? Your Master is waiting for you, you should go and see her now."

"I'm sorry, but I must refuse" – a short answer came from behind her back. Irisviel blinked. That was something new, Siegfried would never ignore her request like that with no serious reason! "I'm afraid I will scare Master if I materialize in my current condition in her presence."

"You've been badly wounded?"

"It's not fatal, I won't have any problems with recovery."

She wasn't so sure about it.

"Would you wait for me? I must go to an important meeting first."

"Of course, please don't mind me." Irisviel saddened, she could clearly feel a pain in Saber's voice. "I would gladly assist you, but I'm actually useless now."

Iri sighed, sure that the problem is more serious than it seems.

"Don't say stupid things, Siegfried. Come to my room. Now. The meeting can wait."

"But…" He sighed mentally, feeling a sudden tension in the air and expecting a serious protest. "As you wish, Lady Irisviel."

Iri couldn't hold back her smile, realizing how similar these two are. Illya protested with the same kind of 'But…'.

Honestly, it's like having two children sometimes. Irisviel smiled at the thought, but when Saber finally materialized, she swallowed and held her breath, not longer in a mood to laugh. His wounds really seemed shallow enough, but they were everywhere and looked awful. Especially his eyes.

"I'm sorry that I scared you, Lady Irisviel."

"It's not… Well, it is, but I think that Illya should be the one to help you. She's strong, she can heal you immediately."

"I know, Master is a very strong magus, but taking too much energy at once may cause a shock to her circuits. I'll take more if necessary, but for now it's perfectly fine to recover naturally, without haste."

Irisviel shook her head. She should already get used to Siegfried's way of thinking, but he still managed to surprise her. For someone with Illya's potential, healing a Servant completely shouldn't cause more troubles than a little headache, but… A little headache was still too much in her Servant's opinion.

It was the reason why she trusted this swordsman so much. She was glad to have someone like him around when the end is near. She had to believe in Kiritsugu's victory, but still…

She shouldn't have any doubts, right? Yet, as a mother, she could feel more, see more. There's a slice chance that they'll both die and then Illya…

"Something troubles you, Lady Irisviel?"

"Actually… yes. But first I need to fix you a little. I'm sorry, it will hurt." She focused on recovering Saber's eyes first, then made him look at least a little bit less scary. She had something very important to say and she wanted to do it in a proper, honest way. "Done, now please try to look at me."

He blinked several times, then nodded, confirming, that everything's all right.

"Thank you, Lady Irisviel. It's more than enough. I'm sorry for causing you so much troubles."

Surprisingly, Irisviel saddened in an instant. Her hands were shaking, like she was trying to make a very important decision. It was painful to even look at her in this state.

"I should be the one to apologize to you, Saber, for what I'm going to do to you right now. I guess you'll never forgive me."

"Lady Irisviel?"

She took a deep breath and suddenly changed into a completely different person: brave, determined and ready to fight.

"Saber, I... I'm the Grail's vessel, there's no way for me to survive this War. That's why I need you to abandon the fight and protect Illya at all costs, even when I'm gone. Please help me and keep her away from this conflict."

Kariya woke up in chains, not really knowing, which part of his body hurts the most. It wasn't really important. He and Berserker were still a part of this insane race for the Grail and it was more than enough for now.

He quickly recognized this room, the creepy basement of the Matou house, and shivered, trying to remember, how he had managed to return from the fight with Caster. The truth was that he had no idea how it happened.

"I must admit, that you did well, Kariya" – the voice came from the shadows in the corner of the room. Zouken smiled and it was enough for his 'prisoner' to feel the need to vomit. "You even managed to get a Command Spell for me."

The old vampire showed a single sigil on his hand; the red sign was gleaming in the dark. Kariya tried to say something, but a very unpleasant surprise waited for him when he opened his mouth.

"That's why I decided to keep you alive a little longer," Zouken continued after forcing the chained magus to swallow a big, fat worm. "I even prepared a special gift for you. Don't be so surprised, just taste it and enjoy it to the fullest."

A sudden shock came through Kariya's shattered circuits. His veins were about to explode, when a huge portion of magical energy started to fill every cell of his weak, dying body.

The pain was not the worst part of this process. For a Master of Berserker nothing could be more painful than the sound of Zouken's loud laugh.

At least until the old vampire spoke again:

"I works quickly, doesn't it? The worm I just gave you was the first to feed on Sakura's purity. How does it feel, Kariya? Go now and fight, win the Grail as you promised. Make a good use of the life you've stolen from this girl."

And he walked away, leaving the whining magus alone with his madness and despair.

Tokiomi Tohsaka was standing proudly in the centre of the parking near the Lord El-Melloi's apartment. The sole fact that he dared to enter Kayneth's territory and raise a magical barrier there should be enough to take it for a challenge, but he decided to provoke his opponent even more openly.

"I know you can hear me, Master of Archer." His voice echoed magically to reach his rival even through the barrier. "I have come here without my Servant, to use magic against magic. Let us duel for the Grail with our lives and our honor!"

Tohsaka could feel the presence of his 'escort' – his so-called allies were observing this improvised battlefield from the shadows. Kiritsugu Emiya was somewhere around with his modern and deadly toys. Lancer was waiting in hiding as well, ready to face any Servant who tries to interfere with the plan. They called it "a support" but Tokiomi was not so sure about their true intentions. Of course, it was good to had a sniper nearby, guarding his back if Kayneth tries to use some dirty tricks, and a Servant ready to repel Archer's or Assassin's sudden assault. It was good, as long as Emiya keeps his promise to act as a team.

The red magus did not show hesitation or weakness, it was not a good time for it. He was the one who came out with this crazy proposal, so he had no right to complain. And, to be honest, he regretted nothing.

It was a fragile alliance and Tokiomi was the one who may lose everything, at least in theory. The truth was that he came here well prepared. Whoever dares to challenge Tohsaka on the land he swore to protect, will pay dearly for this mistake.

"Defeat is not an option," Tokiomi whispered and let himself welcome his opponent with a thin smile.

As expected, Kayneth couldn't ignore an opportunity to have a traditional magical duel, and left his safe hideout. Luring him out was just too easy.

"I, the ninth head of the Archibald family, Kayneth El-Melloi, accept your challenge." The European magus prepared his Volumen Hydrargyrum and smiled like a child who has just received a new toy. "Shall we?"

The red magus only nodded; it was clear that their little chat has just ended. They both let the spells speak and a red flame clashed with a liquid silver.

"I know it was a dirty move to use your curse against you," Irisviel said after a long moment of silence. She was determined to achieve her goal, but also looked disappointed by Saber's reaction. "I know I did something unforgivable - I asked a Heroic Spirit summoned to War to abandon the fight. No apology will be enough."

Actually Siegfried was not angry at all; he remained silent only because he needed time to process all the unexpected information. He was already tangled in the web of wishes, curses and machinations, but this single request changed everything. Finally he could act freely and focus on the most important things, but…

Being under the power of the curse or not, he felt like a traitor. Because of Iri's intrigue Illya's wish will never come true, right? No, it was hopeless from the very beginning.

Maybe a promised miracle they're fighting for can solve this problem? Is the Grail really so powerful to bring back Irisviel even if her death is needed to activate it?

Siegfried was not so sure about it. What a cursed, black magic demands such awful sacrifices? Crushing dreams of long dead heroes is cruel enough, but this was just unbelievable…

If he keeps fighting, he will actively take part in killing Iri. If he abandons the War, his little Master will probably never forgive him. Is he really not able to make things work, no matter what he'll do?

"Lady Irisviel." Siegfried sighed, still not sure what he should do, and gently grabbed Iri's hand, in a knightly manner. His voice was even warmer than before. "You did nothing wrong. It's me, I failed as a Servant. Anyway, thank you for trusting me enough to share this important secret."

"It's not…" She exhaled slowly, again amazed by Saber's ability to blame himself for every single problem they face. "I will talk with Illya, I'm sure she'll understand and agree with me. No one is to blame here, we are facing the hopeless situation together. This plan is the best I could come up with. Saving everyone is impossible, you know that."

"It's not an excuse for a legendary being. Impossible or not, we can't stop fighting for our ideals."

"That's why I had chosen you for this task." Her beautiful smile calmed Saber down a little. "I know you'll keep your promise, no matter what. I can't ask Kiritsugu to abandon his dream and there's no one else I can trust, so… Take a good care of my little girl, Saber."

It was probably the most desperate and difficult task ever placed upon him.

"I will."

"So everything is ok now?" – a silent question came from the corridor.

They did not expect Illya to show up so suddenly. The girl was yawning and looked so innocent in her pink pajamas, that they were not able to scold her for eavesdropping.

"Master, what are you doing here?"

"I told you to call me Illya! I could not sleep," she explained simply and entered the room. "I was so worried… But it's ok now?"

"Yes." Irisviel gently caressed Illya's hair. You should be sleeping now, as you promised, not walking around the castle like that, Sweetie."

"Gooood." Illya yawned again and sat between them, visibly happy. She ignored the last reprimand like a true princess. "Worrying is not my favorite thing. I'm glad it's over. But there's something more… Saber!" She poked his arm accusingly. "Why are you hiding your most powerful Noble Phantasm from me?"

Iri blinked, totally surprised, but Siegfried only sighed, admitting defeat.

"It seems that Miss Sella is an awesome teacher. You've improved greatly, Master, to see through my little tricks." It was not clear if Saber is really proud of Illya or he's just trying to avoid the topic.

"Flattery won't save you this time!" The girl tried to act like an adult, but a cute blush totally ruined the effect of her desperate efforts. "Explain yourself!"

"It's far too dangerous and I think…"

"No excuses." A tiny finger landed on Saber's nose. "Speak. It's an order."

Facing the curious gazes of both women, Siegfried had no choice but to obey.

So, I'm finally back. Sorry for keep You waiting for so long. Your constant support helped me a lot, as well as the fact that You're still here with me, knowing that I always end my stories.

Next chapters will come soon, I promise to publish them more often, as before.

Aaaand… thanks for help with choosing Servants to participate in the next War! I'm still hesitant about Caster and Assassin, so the poll is still open for these two classes.

Thank You again and see You next time!