AN: This is a sequel or a longer epilogue to my first story "Our Scars" and picks up roughly nine months later.
I don't know what happened, but as soon as I finished the last chapter of that story, I felt pretty inspired to write something new.

If you just stumbled onto this now you should probably go back and read Part I first. Otherwise you will probably miss out on some background info and might be dealing with some spoilers in here.

I'm a sucker for episodes and films that go back and forth between time-lines, between what's going on in the present day and what has happened in the past, so that's what I'm gonna try to do with this story. I really hope you guys like it and that my ideas keep flowing...

Work Title inspired by the Song "Beautiful Crime" by Tamer; General TW in advance for violence.

Chapter Title "Woke Up A Rebel" by Reuben And The Dark

DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the Chicago PD, Fire or Med characters, only my OCs!

February 18th 2021

"Please, please, Jay! Jay! Look at me!"

He would have loved nothing more, but he couldn't. His lids were too heavy and swollen, almost as if they were sewn shut and his head felt like twice its usual size. If he'd had to guess, he had at least a concussion, maybe even serious head trauma. The task at hand felt absolutely impossible, although he knew, that if he managed to open them now, he'd look into his favorite, long-lashed and expressive blue orbs. Eyes that were his anchor and focal point, usually full of fire and passion, full of life. Full of promises that everything would be alright. Only, the last thing he'd seen in them had been nerve wrecking fear, shock and panic. He so desperately had wanted to take that away.

But now? He was drifting further and further away, as if only small waves of consciousness washed over him, barely keeping him connected to the outside world. One minute every bone and muscle in his body ached so much that he wanted to scream and there definitely was a warm, sticky liquid running down his temple. The next minute he felt nothing at all, like he was drowning under water, a low buzzing sound in his ears silencing everything else around him. In those minutes he was almost at peace.

He was struggling to take deeper breaths and he knew it probably was because a broken rib was digging into his lungs. Probably one of many broken ribs. Still he wasn't sure, if the wheezing sounds were actually coming out of his mouth, or someone else's. It was difficult to tell, somehow it didn't feel real. The thoughts in his head either didn't add up, or he was too tired to figure them out. He couldn't remember the last time he had been so overall sore.

Again there was this sound ringing through the blanket of nothingness around him:

"Jay! Baby, please don't die! Don't die on me! You can't! We… I need you!"

Someone was shaking him and pulling him up. The small eruptions let the pain in his head flare up again. Someone groaned. Had that been him? He felt like a puppet with absolute no control over anything. There was nothing he could do, nothing he could give in response, although a small part of him knew she desperately needed him to give her something to hold on to. All he had ever wanted to do was be there for her, and now it looked like he was failing her completely. She should have stayed far away from him, right from the start, because apparently he was doomed. He had only wanted to help, to protect her, his family, but he had only made it worse. So much worse…

His only consolation was, that if he indeed was dying, these arms holding him, were the only ones he would ever want to die in. No doubt they belonged to her. He'd know her embrace in any possible and impossible state, semi-conscious or even unconscious.

He wanted to hug her back, wanted to show her that he felt her presence and warmth by his side, that he was trying not to let go and leave her, to feel her one last time, but no chance: He didn't have the strength. To the tiny piece of him that was still very much alive, this weakened and broken body of his, felt like a prison. He would have been immensely frustrated with himself, if he had been able to focus for more than five seconds.

Something dripped onto his face, something lukewarm, like a rain drop. Or was that more blood? Tears?

"I'm here, Jay! You're not alone!"

If he'd had any control over his facial muscles, he would have smiled. Those were the words he usually repeated when dealing with victims. Victims on the verge of not pulling through, victims with gushing bullet or knife wounds, suffering from severe blood-loss. All in all hopeless cases. Words he had said to his fellow soldiers in Afghanistan, when they had been dying in his arms. Words they had taught him in army training and at the police academy.

It was so ironic. Obviously he was the hopeless case this time. Those words felt surprisingly comforting, although the voice uttering them, over and over, sounded like an echo from many miles away.

'I love you.'

Maybe he was smiling, there was no way to tell. Maybe he was dying.

30 hours earlier:

When Jay jogged up the stairs to the 21st district, one could've detected a definite spring in his step. You didn't even have to look that hard. Certainly it had to be considered illegal to be this ridiculously chipper, he thought, but for once he didn't care. Why hide his happiness?

Just before entering the building, he shot her another text:

We should have taken the whole day off together! Can't wait for tonight!

For a minute Jay kept his eyes glued to the screen after the message had been delivered, somehow willing it to show an instant reply. Of course his chances were slim. She was probably already at her meeting, but still: The cheerful state he was in, was one that was easier to bear when shared. Like he needed to have her by his side to be able to give her a good squeeze every once in a while, to get rid of this nervous restlessness. With one last glance at a newly added picture on his phone and a deep sigh, Jay then finally pocketed his device and walked into the precinct. He really had to get a grip, if he wanted to survive this day.

"Seriously, Halstead? Again with that silly smile?" Judging by the sarcastic greeting, he hadn't been able to successfully neutralize his facial expression before approaching the front desk.

"Good to see you too Trudy!" he chuckled, staying true to the nickname she'd once given him.

"When's this irritating honeymoon-phase of yours gonna be over?" His sergeant grumbled, more towards her crossword puzzle than towards him, as usual acting like she hated dealing with happy people.

At least in front of everyone else lurking around her station at noon, Platt kept true to her reputation of being a hard ass. Jay knew better though.

"I hope never!" He responded with a wink and an extra broad smile plastered to his face.

Oh how he loved to rile Trudy up some more on days like these. She gave him the satisfaction of an overly annoyed eye-roll, reserved just for him, before lowering her voice and muttering:

"Not that I actually care, but I guess your 'appointment' went well then?"

"It did!" Jay answered shortly, really trying to reign himself in and put that 'silly smile' of his on the back burner.

"But what would you know about that?" He couldn't remember telling Trudy why he had wanted to take the morning off.

"I know, that a certain Mrs. Rianne Halstead called me, three times I think, to ensure that you weren't on shift, and demanded to not, under any circumstances, call you in before 12.30…"

"Oh, did she now?"

That little Jezebel… Jay wasn't really as surprised as he made it sound and wasn't even that offended that Rianne had felt the need to ensure everything would go to plan. He guessed he had a pretty bad track record considering last minute cancellations. And on another note, Jay still liked to hear other people call his wife by her new name.

Apparently the private talk with Trudy was over though:

"Well, anyway: While you enjoyed your morning off, other people have already been busy. Criminal people to be exact…"

The sergeant hurried to give him the newest scoop and spared him an unnecessary trip upstairs: "You're needed elsewhere, so no need to head upstairs in the first place."

Like on cue, the gate to Intelligence's quarters crashed closed behind someone, and Kim Burgess came rushing down from the bullpen:

"Oh good Jay, you're here! We're headed out: Possible abduction, they need a detective on scene! Everyone else's either out on a lunch run or still working yesterday's case!"

Seeing some action rather than sitting at his desk doing paperwork all day, sounded like music to his ears. So Jay obediently nodded at his female colleague and knocked onto the front desk two times with his flat hand, before he followed the brunette woman out to the parking lot.

"Why're you wearing your old jacket?" Kim pointed towards his quilted hooded jacket that was a little worn, a lot shorter and not quite as padded as his usual black winter coat.

Jay's response consisted of a significant look and an excessive sigh: "Let's just say: My favorite one was 'occupied'…"

"Good thing that the temperature's are up from 5, to 18 degrees then…" Kim winked with a shrewd smile, knowing fully well who had robbed Jay of his clothes and why.

They took Adam's Jeep, and Kim hopped into the driver's seat, because she already had all the details and directions to their newest crime scene. It was one of those days when Jay didn't mind someone else driving and just was content to get caught up on everything Kim knew so far.

"How's Tommy doing in day-care?" Jay asked when they'd covered all the work-related stuff and still had to drive a few miles.

They were headed somewhere between West Loop and East Garfield Park. Burgess face lit up, like usual when asked about her son:

"He's a champ. I'm doing much worse with it to be honest," Kim let out a self-deprecating laugh and turned the car around another street-corner.

Burgess' and Ruzek's offspring was a little over 9 months old now and Kim had come back to work full-time only a month ago, when little Tom had finally gotten settled in PD's daycare-center. Jay often wondered how the two of them did it at all: Handling their jobs and raising a child that young at the same time. Although he guessed it didn't matter how old the child: Having one at all completely changed the outlook on what they did for a living. Suddenly there was just so much more to consider and think about. So much more to lose if something happened to either one of them.
As Tom was also Rianne's godson, Jay had spent a considerable amount of time with the youngest Ruzek over the last months and that boy sure was adorable as hell.

"But Adam is doing so much worse with it than I am, so… I guess I'm doing okay…" Kim added.

"Yeah, I saw him drop Tommy off yesterday. He sure didn't look happy to leave him there…"

"See? I'm serious, for a minute I thought Adam would drop out of Intelligence and become a stay-at-home dad… He was even talking about wanting to try for a second baby soon…" Kim rolled her eyes, but Jay knew it was a loving gesture, because there was a hint of her dimples showing.

Burgess secretly adored the hell out of Ruzek's very soft spot for his son and his love for kids in general.

"Oh, but what's more important: How was 'your morning off'?" His colleague suddenly redirected, before Jay could ask her how she felt about that second baby option, and looked at him expectantly, drawing quotation marks in the air, as if she was using some kind of code.

"Good…" Jay nodded matter-of-factly and kept his eyes on the road ahead.

Even though he was buzzing with excitement just thinking back to it, he wouldn't give out details that easily.

"And?" A slight impatience was hidden in Kim's question and he had to suppress a smirk.

"She… wants to be kept in the dark."

"But you don't? So you know?"

Jay loved that they could read each other so well that they could have these little, almost one-worded conversations, and still get everything important they wanted from them.
Knowing exactly what his colleague was hinting at, Jay couldn't hide his content smile anymore:

"Yes, I do!"

Kim smiled back at him understandingly and Jay added: "Just in case she changes her mind…," feeling unusually talkative today.

"Which, let's be honest, is probably not gonna happen," Kim joked and Jay let out a snort.

They both knew very well that his wife could be stubborn as hell, and that once she had made up her mind, it was almost impossible to persuade her otherwise. Funnily enough that was only one more thing he loved about her.
Kim knew that Jay wouldn't give out any more info, so she didn't pester him further. Not while they were at work anyway. To a certain degree, he liked to keep things professional.

Jay was suddenly a little confused by his surroundings, or rather where they were headed exactly. With Kim driving and them talking, he only saw now, that they had just passed the Departement of Juvenile Justice.

"What is it?" Kim caught on to his more and more agitated state and that he was turning around in his seat to check out the neighborhood they were currently driving through.

Slower, because they seemed to have almost reached their destination.

"Nothing… I… just … I dropped off Rianne near Starr Park earlier…," he said with furrowed brows.

This was surely not related. His constant wariness and solicitude had to be playing tricks on him again. Jay tried to shrug the thought off, like an annoying fly on his neck. But a certain tingling in his back still wouldn't leave him alone, and a stupid sense of foreboding was kicking in, that was uncomfortably persistent. It settled in the pit of his stomach.
Subconsciously he traced the outlines of the silicone wedding band on his left ring finger. Showing commitment, showing that he belonged to someone, had been important to him, so wearing a sign of exactly that everyday, was a thing he would never go without, except when doing undercover work.
The ring looked surprisingly real, like it was actually made out of silver, but the material proved to be much safer in his line of work, than the golden one he only wore when he was off duty.

"Oh good, finally… Halstead, Burgess!"

A patrol officer, already working the scene, summoned them over, when he saw Kim and Jay pull up on N Western Ave, near an auto repair corporation. They knew him, because he also worked at the 21st.
It wasn't really a murder scene or much of a crime site, but patrol had shut off an area on the street and sidewalk, probably around some evidence or certain footprints, tyre marks, etc. Should be difficult to get anything useful in the dirty, partly already slushy snow, Jay thought.
Onlookers, especially workers from the auto shop, were hanging around, and another patrol officer was busy taking statements.
Like on autopilot Jay was already checking for pods and cameras on, or opposite the buildings around him. He knew that sole witness statements would probably lead them nowhere concerning car model, plates and people involved. Kim had told him that someone had been seen being pulled into a van. These things had the tendency of being over and done, before anyone paid too much attention. Knowing how much footage they'd have to go through to get a lead on these guys, Jay already knew he could kiss his evening goodbye.
On the diagonally opposite side of the street was a 'Children's Home + Aid' center. Maybe Rianne was over there somewhere. Maybe she had seen something and that was why he was feeling so heavy-hearted and worried? Or maybe she had already been inside when the kidnapping had taken place and knew nothing about what was going on outside her current work place. Otherwise she probably would have called him. Yeah, she would have.

Shaking off the thought about his wife again, Jay took a closer look around, eyes and mind alert and searching for details.
Why was his skin still tingling? By now it had moved up to his neck, making his hairs stand up. Jay pulled his beanie further down, over his ears. Maybe this freaking February cold was making him shiver.

Kim had already started talking to the officer on scene:

"Witnesses saw a silver van pull up, two guys with beanies and face coverings jumped out and grabbed a woman standing right here on the side walk. They pulled her inside, doors slid shut and off they went. Textbook kidnapping I'd say. We've got no blood, no real other traces…"

"Is there someone who could describe the woman?" Kim asked, scribbling something down on her notepad.

"Not really, they all said it all went too fast. They probably drugged her, because they didn't even hear her scream… We got a lot of contradictory statements, but we found this…."

The officer picked up something from the hood of a nearby patrol car.
Jay felt the tingling in his neck getting stronger and his attention spiking. He was almost breathing down the other man's neck, when he turned around to show them the supposed evidence:

"Witnesses say they found this on the ground after the car had taken off… there was a phone inside. We have to get it unlocked by a technician to be able to make a connection. Could very well be the victim's belongings, but we have to make sure…"

Jay just stared and swallowed. Anyone could have had a pastel purple iPhone, but probably only a handful of people, if even, had dried flower patels inside their cell phone cases. And there was only one person, who's phone code Jay knew that had a cell phone just like this one. He really wished it weren't so, he didn't want it to be true. Maybe he was already starting to see things, that weren't there, but now Kim looked at him and in her eyes Jay found, that she had begun to put two and two together as well:

"Jay? Is that… your jacket?" she asked carefully, her voice barely above a whisper.

It could have been any black men's jacket made out of water-repellent fabric, with breast pockets, high collar and Velcro® fasteners. It would have been a very mysterious coincidence though. He just knew it was his!

Kim took the phone from the officer and handed it to him. Jay's hands were slightly shaking and he was thankful for the gloves he wore, so that no one could see just how badly his fingers were indeed trembling. The phone was still intact and working and when Jay pressed the home button, entered a pin code and saw the background picture pop up, all his worst fears were suddenly confirmed. His airway felt too tight:

A woman in a beautiful, sequined, long dress draped over a man's shoulder, the light of a setting September sun sparkling in the golden color of her gown. He knew she was laughing her heart out in that picture, although one couldn't exactly see, because the camera had caught the man's radiant smile, the love in his eyes and her bare feet hanging in the air. But Jay could still hear the sound of that laugh ringing in his ears clear as day: Real and deep, goofy and infectious with a devil-may-care attitude, advancing towards dirty, like someone had told a smutty joke. Jay knew, because he had been there: He was the one holding her. It had been their wedding day.

Jay's heart was in complete free-fall now. There was no doubt he was holding Rianne's phone in his hands. The message he'd sent before going in to work was still sitting in her inbox, unread, and there were several missed calls from various numbers and a voice mail from her office.
He suddenly felt so sick he was afraid he might throw up any moment. He only noticed he had been in a tunnel full of fear and slowly building panic, when Kim lightly touched his arm and he flinched:

"Jay? I'll call the others!"

He had no answer to the why, the who or the how. The only thing Jay knew with gut-wrenching certainty was, that someone had obviously kidnapped his wife…

Thoughts, questions, comments, reviews are highly appreciated! XX