I wake up slowly.

Someone's knocking on my door. I stand up, stretch, walk over to the door, and open it.

"Hi," says Hiroto.

"You were like, totally out of it," says Rin.

"How long…?" I ask, dazed.

"Several hours," says Hiroto. "It's dinnertime now."

"We're all like, gathered in the cafeteria?" says Rin. "And Akiko was, like, all upset that you were missing. So she, like, told us to come get you."

"Akiko?" I repeat.

"Yeah," says Hiroto. "She was very adamant about gathering everyone for a meeting."

"She just started, like, bossing us around, for some reason," says Rin. "She thinks she already, like, owns the place, or whatever?"

"Well," I reply, "Akiko did say something about having been a ship captain. So it's not surprising that she'd take charge."

We walk to the cafeteria.

Inside, I see that everyone's crowded together at the long table. They've even pushed one of the small, round tables to one end of it. Ryu's sitting at that end, flanked by Shingo to his right and Takeru to his left. At the other end—near the kitchen—Mizuki is seated, flanked by Akiko to her left and Naomi to her right.

Rin and Hiroto take their seats. Hiroto's sitting next to Shingo. Rin is on the closer side, near the center. There's only one empty space—to Rin's right, between her and Emi. I wish I could sit next to Hiroto. But I take the empty seat anyway.

Across the table, there's a bit of a commotion.

"Please, stop!" shouts Yuna. "You'll die! And then when everyone chooses a blackened, Monokuma will say, 'Sorry, the real blackened was potato chips!' And then we'll all die!"

"Tough shit," says Jun, sitting next to her. He eats another potato chip.

"You can't just eat nothing but potato chips! This is why you're so low-energy!"

"That so?" says Jun. "Well, you've given me a lot to think about." He eats a potato chip.

"No!" shouts Yuna. "I can't let you do it! I can't let you get all fat and gross and disgusting like Momoka!"

Jun turns to Momoka, sitting next to him. "Want a potato chip?" he asks.

"Hmmm… thanks," Momoka says, taking a chip from Jun's bag.

"NO!" screams Yuna. "MURDERER! YOU'RE KILLING HER!"

She tries to grab the chips. Jun pushes her away, and holds the bag out of reach. "Excuse me, whose child is this?" Jun grunts, showing irritation for the first time since I met him. "She seems to have lost her pacifier."

"Down, girl!" says Ryu. "That's not how you do it."

Yuna crosses her arms and pouts.

"You gotta butter them up," says Ryu. "Ease them into it. Make them want it. Here, Jun—catch!" He throws a bottle of seltzer water. Jun catches it. "Drink up, my friend," Ryu says, smiling. "Consider it my treat. Gotta stay hydrated, right?"

Jun still looks annoyed, but he drinks the seltzer water.

"Baby steps, Yuna," says Ryu. "We'll get 'em all in good shape, sooner or later."

In the end, Tsubasa forces Yuna to switch seats with him. Yuna continues pouting.

A little while later, Akiko claps rhythmically to gather everyone's attention.

"Okay, everyone!" says Akiko. "I'm glad you're all here! We've got some stuff we need to talk about!" She stands up, and puts her hands on her hips. "We've hit some rough waters, so we'll need all hands on deck. Because, if you think about it, this school… is exactly like a ship."

There's silence.

"Uh… you gonna explain that one?" asks Tsubasa.

"I don't need to explain it," says Akiko. "I already said it!"

"But how is this school like a ship?" asks Yuna.

"It just is!"

"Oh, I get it!" says Jeff. "Well… no, I don't. But I'm trying!"

"Please let her finish," Naomi says, sighing. "Believe it or not, she is getting to a point."

"Yep!" says Akiko. "And my point is that this ship… is no ordinary ship." She nods sagely. "This ship… is a ship in rebellion against the authorities. In other words, it's a pirate ship! And the sixteen of us are its pirate crew!"

"Arrrr," says Jeff. "Now I be gettin' it."

"Back in the Age of Sail," Akiko continues, "a merchant ship would get all its authority from the King or Queen. It was a brutal hierarchy, with the monarch on top, the ship captain below that, and the crew way down at the bottom. But pirate ships weren't like that! They got their authority from no one and nowhere! They all had to hang together, or else they'd all… you know… hang! They split all their treasure equally! They held votes and stuff! The captain had no special privileges, and was elected democratically!

"If this ship's gonna rebel against Monokuma, then we've gotta be like pirates. And that means we need to elect ourselves a pirate captain! Someone with leadership experience. Someone we can trust. Someone who'll keep us on the right path, no matter what!"

"Okay, okay, we get it," says Tsubasa. "No need to toot your own horn."

"What?" says Akiko, taken aback. "Whose horn do you think I'm tooting, here? There's only one horn I'm gonna toot." She gestures. "And that's the horn of Mizuki Tenshi, the Ultimate Moral Compass! I nominate her to be our captain!"

There's some murmuring.

"Wait, seriously?" says Tsubasa. "That's where you were going with this?"

"Yep!" Akiko cheerfully replies. "Mizuki is definitely the best choice! Monokuma wants to make us all be evil, right? Well, who's the least evil person at this table? It's Mizuki Tenshi, the perfect paragon of purity! In this kind of situation, only an Ultimate Moral Compass can navigate us to safety!"

"Does Mizuki even accept this nomination?" asks Shingo, sounding skeptical.

Mizuki mutters something.

"Captain Mizuki accepts!" says Akiko.

"Really?" says Shingo, brow furrowed. "Did she say that? Because I didn't hear her. I'm pretty sure most of us didn't hear her. In fact, I'm not sure I've heard her say a single word in the entire time that I've known her."

"A leader must speak clearly, and act decisively," says Takeru.

"Yeah, this is kind of a bust," says Tsubasa. "I was ready to let Akiko do her thing—but Mizuki?"

"Don't worry, Mizuki!" says Yuna. "Us short people have each other's backs!"

"Hmm," Momoka drawls. "A quiet captain might be nice…"

"I don't know," says Rin. "I mean, she seems nice? But also, like. Kind of a prude?"

"If everyone will be quiet for a moment," Naomi says, crossing her arms, "let me explain something. Mizuki really is the best choice, and—in fact—it's not even close.

"Mizuki is both the Founder and the Chief Director of the National Public Morals Council, the first organization—and by far the largest—to unite Public Morals Committees in schools across Japan. The NPMC trains its members, coordinates with schools, and crafts recommendations for better rule-enforcement techniques—and for better rules—all with the goal of improving morality within school grounds. Mizuki herself is highly involved in all of these processes. And her leadership has been an indisputable success. Schools with members in the NPMC have seen a steep decline in delinquency and rule-breaking, even as those numbers continue to rise nationally.

"Monokuma will do everything in his power to tempt us toward immorality. Only one person here has a proven record in stifling immoral temptations, and that's Mizuki. We'd be fools to elect anyone else."

"Plus, she's just so cute!" Akiko squeals, pinching Mizuki's cheek. "Just… look at this face! Can you really say 'no' to this face?"

"Cuteness aside," says Naomi, "if anyone has a problem with our captain's… volume, rest assured that Akiko and I will be standing right next to her—and we've already grown quite accustomed to discerning her voice. Any command she gives can be relayed through us."

"That's right! Just leave it to me—Akiko Narumi, the Ultimate Sailor, First Mate of the Hope's Peak pirate crew!"

"And you can leave it to me," Naomi says, smiling, "the other First Mate."

"Well…" says Akiko. "Technically, there can only be one First Mate, so you'd actually be Second Mate…"

"…We can decide on formal title later," Naomi says, looking annoyed.

"Oh, no—this administration is already falling apart!" says Jeff. "And it hasn't even been elected yet!"

"Oh—that reminds me!" says Akiko. "We should hurry up with the voting already!"

"Yes, let's get on with it," says Naomi. "Though, it's really just a formality."

"Hey—wait a moment!" says Tsubasa. "What the hell kind of election is this? There's only one candidate!"

"I don't see why we need more than one candidate," says Naomi, "seeing as there's only one correct choice. However, if anyone would like to nominate someone, please speak up now."

"Alright," says Ryu, "how about the one fuckin' guy here with actual experience leading a rogue organization that operates outside the law?" He stands up, turns his chair around, and lifts one foot onto it. "I nominate myself—Ryu Minamoto, the Ultimate Yakuza!

"Listen. I respect you, Mizuki. Really—what you're doing for schools is a good thing. In those endeavors, I wish you all the best.

"But all that goody-two-shoes stuff won't fly in here. Because this ain't really a school, and it ain't really a ship. It's a goddamn prison. And if you're gonna bust out of prison, you don't want someone like her. You want someone like me.

"You guys don't know Monokuma. I know Monokuma. I've dealt with guys like Monokuma." He leans forward. There's a tense silence. "Let me tell you," Ryu says, his voice lowered, "guys like Monokuma can be dealt with. It won't be fuckin' easy. It'll take patience. It'll take perseverance. It'll take discipline. I promise you, it can be done. But we need someone who understands the cards we hold—and who knows how to play 'em.

"An operation like this requires finesse. Our first fuckup could be our last. We can't rely on an amateur in the field of danger. We need an expert. We need a yakuza. Vote for me, and I guarantee I'll keep every single one of you alive and safe. And when that one perfect opportunity comes, you goddamn better believe we're going to take it—and we'll get the hell out of here!"

Jeff, Takeru, and Tsubasa start clapping.

"O Captain! My Captain!" says Jeff.

"All men wish for peace," says Takeru. "Yet in times of war, we must seek out a warrior to lead us. A warrior such as this man."

"Hold on a minute," says Naomi. "We never actually established that self-nominations are allowed."

"In that case, I second Ryu's nomination!" says Jeff. "Or, if the first nomination didn't count… I first his nomination!"

"And I shall third that nomination," says Takeru. "Or—perhaps—second it."

"And I'll either fourth it or third it!" says Tsubasa.

"Fine, then," says Naomi. "Any other takers?"

There's silence.

"The battle lines have been drawn," says Takeru.

"Then let's get started," says Naomi.

"I'll get the index cards!" says Akiko. She sprints to a nearby table.

Personally, I'm feeling conflicted. Mizuki has barely spoken up this whole time—and she hasn't made eye contact with anyone. She's just been sitting there, fidgeting, while Naomi and Akiko speak on her behalf. It's pretty clear that a vote for Mizuki would really be a vote for Naomi and Akiko.

But maybe that's okay? The trio of Naomi, Akiko, and Mizuki do sort of cover each other's weaknesses. They all bring different strengths—Naomi's brains, Akiko's charisma, and Mizuki's moral purity. On the other hand, not having a single, strong leader might be a problem.

Ryu would definitely be a strong leader. But would a yakuza really be the right kind of strong leader?

If only there were someone else. Someone with strength and morality.

Someone like…

"I nominate Hiroto Oshiro!" I blurt out, standing up.

Everyone's looking at me now. I feel a rush of panic. Uh… now what?

I stand there like an idiot for a few seconds. But then I look Hiroto in the eye, and the words just come flowing out.

"Right now, we're like dogs in a crate. We've all been shoved into this horrible situation against our will, and we don't even understand why. Only one person here has dedicated his life to getting people out of situations like this. And that's Hiroto Oshiro, the Ultimate Attorney.

"In the end, it wasn't Ryu who got his uncle out of prison. It was Hiroto. It doesn't always take a warrior. We all know we can't beat Monokuma with force. We need someone who can carefully navigate us to safety. Someone who sees the tiniest holes in every argument—the tiniest contradictions in every statement. Someone who knows what kind of evidence to look for—and how to use it. Someone who sees the bigger picture.

"Hiroto has done it, over and over again. He's given people hope when they had nothing left but despair. He's given people freedom when they thought they'd be locked away for life. And… he'll do the same thing for us. If we make him our captain."

I sit down. Anxiety is starting to creep back in.

"Well," says Hiroto, "I wasn't planning on running, but… you make a strong argument. I accept your nomination."

He's smiling at me. I feel myself blush a bit.

"Okay!" says Akiko. "Now, here's how this'll work! Everyone gets an index card and a pen. Write down the name of your candidate, and then fold the index card. I'll come around to collect the votes in my hat. And then—"

"Wait!" says Tsubasa.

We wait.

"I nominate Jun Mujun, the Ultimate Hacker!" says Tsubasa.

"A turncoat?" says Takeru.

"You can't nominate two people!" says Yuna.

"I retract my earlier nomination," says Tsubasa. "Sorry, Ryu—but I've changed my mind. The yakuza are too old-school. To bust us out of this high-tech prison, we need a new kind of criminal. A high-tech criminal. Someone like Jun Mujun, the Ultimate Hacker!

"You wanna talk about finding the tiniest holes? The tiniest contradictions? This guy's done that on a scale you can't even imagine. Not a single security expert on the planet can beat him in a head-to-head matchup. And in case you haven't noticed, security is sorta our biggest problem right now. Jun will hack our way out of it! He should be our pirate captain!"

"Heh," says Jun. "Well. I can't really turn that down, can I?"

"Do we have any other last-minute nominations?" asks Naomi.

Silence.

"Okay then!" says Akiko. "It's time to cast your votes! Will you make the right choice, or the dreadfully wrong one? What's it gonna be? What's it gonna beeee?"

We gape at her.

"Um… sorry," Akiko says sheepishly. "I was just trying out some gallows humor."

They pass out index cards and pens. We vote, fold our cards, and drop them in Akiko's hat as she walks around the table.

Naomi counts the votes, with Tsubasa and Takeru watching over her shoulder. Tsubasa quickly gets frustrated and returns to his seat. But Takeru remains standing.

Finally, Naomi hands Akiko a sheet of paper. Akiko holds it up. "And the results are in!"

HOPE'S PEAK PIRATE CREW CAPTAIN

ELECTION RESULTS

Mizuki Tenshi – 6

Ryu Minamoto – 5

Hiroto Oshiro – 3

Jun Mujun – 2

"Mizuki Tenshi, the Ultimate Moral Compass, is our new captain!"

"Bested by a single vote," Takeru laments, returning to his seat. "Yet the final strike is where every battle is won or lost."

"Seeing as no one got a majority," says Shingo, "shouldn't we hold a runoff between the top two choices?"

"Nah, don't bother," says Ryu. "I concede. You won fair and square, Mizuki—and a man's gotta know when to quit. Here—catch!" Suddenly, he throws a seltzer bottle across the table. Akiko catches it, and gives it to Mizuki. "Consider it my peace offering," Ryu says, smiling. "Gotta stay hydrated, right?"

Mizuki mutters something.

"Captain Mizuki thanks you for your kindness!" says Akiko.

"Anytime, Captain," says Ryu. "As for the four people who voted for me—I implore you to hold no grudges. Unity is the best weapon we got against power-tripping dickwads like Monokuma. Let's work together with Captain Mizuki, and kick that robot teddy bear's ass."

"Not that it matters," says Hiroto, "but I also concede. And I implore… all of those things that Ryu just said."

"I would've conceded even if I'd won," says Jun.

"Wait, really?" says Tsubasa.

"My, my," whispers a voice in my ear. "How delightfully clever."

I resist an urge to run screaming. What the hell, Emi?

"I'm quite impressed," Emi whispers. "Your heartfelt display split the male vote, ensuring victory for us girls' preferred choice. I never expected such cunning from you."

The male vote? What is she talking about?

Wait… Mizuki got six votes. I think Rin might have voted for Ryu, but other than that… am I the only girl who didn't vote for Mizuki? Am I a traitor to my gender?

"And to think you picked Hiroto—such a brilliant target!" Emi continues. "You proved that the person who knew Ryu best was willing to run against him. Thus, Ryu lost Tsubasa's crucial support. So very, very clever. I will be watching your progress very closely."

What the hell is she talking about? Did I just pull some ingenious Machiavellian stunt without even trying?

Oh, well… I guess I'll just keep pretending it was intentional.

Meanwhile, Mizuki's muttering something.

"Ryu," says Naomi. "In light of the closeness of this election—and fully agreeing with your point about unity—the Captain believes you've earned the right to be her third First Mate."

"First Mate, huh?" says Ryu. "Well, I don't know about that. Our leadership styles are too different. In a position like that, I'd end up stepping on the Captain's toes." He smiles. "However, if the position of Second Mate is open, I'll gladly apply for it."

Mizuki mutters.

"The Captain has decided!" says Akiko. "I—Akiko Narumi—am appointed First First Mate! Naomi Shimizu is appointed Second First Mate! And Ryu Minamoto is now our Captain's First Second Mate! The only thing left… is to choose a Quartermaster!"

"You'll have to explain that one to me," says Ryu. "I'm not so familiar with these nautical terms."

"It's simple!" says Akiko. "The Quartermaster is the one who… masters the, um… quarters. …Okay, modern ships don't really work like this anymore, so I'm not totally clear on the details. Basically, the Quartermaster is in charge of our supplies, and keeps track of everyone's whereabouts, and stuff. They're sort of the organizer-in-chief who keeps the ship running smooth and tight!"

Everyone looks at Shingo.

"Does anyone come to mind?" Shingo asks drily.

Mizuki mutters. I need to stress that, this whole time, she has never once looked anyone in the eye. She has her hands on the table, and she's looking at them, and sometimes fidgeting while she mutters commands that only two people can hear. The whole thing is just… bizarre.

"Shingo Chiba," says Naomi. "The Captain wishes to appoint you to the position of Quartermaster. Do you accept?"

"I suppose so," says Shingo. "Although, full disclosure—I voted for Ryu."

"I doubt that's an issue."

"Yep!" says Akiko. "The more unity, the better! Right, Captain?"

Mizuki nods.

"On pirate ships," says Akiko, "the Quartermaster was sometimes elected by the crew. But I think we can just skip that step! …Plus, we didn't bring enough index cards.

"Anyway, the last thing we need to do… is come up with a Pirate Code!"

"A Pirate Code?" says Jeff. "Oh—you mean a secret signal, like Morse Code!"

"No, silly!" says Akiko. "I'm talking about a code of conduct! A set of rules! Only, um… this might take a while, because… we're basically making this up as we go along. So, anyone who wants to join us—feel free! And anyone who doesn't—feel free to go to bed! Either way, we'll vote on the final result sometime tomorrow!"

I'm glad to hear this, because I'm feeling pretty tired. This evening was a bit more intense than I expected. Maybe I'll just slip away quietly…


Author's Note: maybe the real blackened was the potato chips we ate along the way.

FTEs will begin in two updates. Vote now for which characters will be featured. Use this address:

strawpoll dot com slash cdpyshbga

Or you can vote in a review.

Coming up next: a motive, maybe?


STUDENT E-HANDBOOK: REPORT CARDS

~·~·~

Female students:

~·~

Koi Amaki

• Ultimate Fangirl

• 5'4"

• Eyes: hazel

• Hair: auburn; has an ahoge

• Outfit: navy-blue sailor fuku with a red necktie; pixelated Kyoko and Chiaki earrings; a pixelated Kaede pin in her headband

• Freckles

The protagonist. An otaku who loves the Danganronpa franchise—among other things.

~·~

Rin Ono

• Ultimate Golfer

• 5'10"

• Eyes: gray

• Hair: blonde (bleached)

• Outfit: a white button-up shirt that isn't buttoned all the way up, and a short skirt

• Tanned skin, and glossy makeup

A gyaru who was raised in deep poverty. Her golfing skills have brought her fame and fortune.

~·~

Naomi Shimizu

• Ultimate Mangaka

• 5'6"

• Eyes: reddish-brown

• Hair: red; tied up in a professional-looking bun

• Outfit: a businesslike suit

• An intense gaze

She's written award-winning manga since she was a child. Her works span nearly every genre.

She was appointed Second First Mate by Captain Mizuki.

~·~

Emi Togami

• Ultimate Origamist

• 5'7"

• Eyes: blue

• Hair: black; clipped up in a traditional Japanese style

• Outfit: an elegant red kimono

• A pink origami flower in her hair

She's often smiling—but what's behind that smile?

The late Byakuya Togami was her second cousin twice removed.

~·~

Akiko Narumi

• Ultimate Sailor

• 5'4"

• Eyes: pink

• Hair: white; pixie cut

• Outfit: a sailor fuku with a white top, blue necktie, and short blue skirt; a white sailor hat

• Very white skin

Despite her albinism, she's sailed around the world several times.

She was appointed First First Mate by Captain Mizuki.

~·~

Mizuki Tenshi

• Ultimate Moral Compass

• 4'11"

• Eyes: green

• Hair: light-brown; pigtails that begin below her shoulders and reach down to her legs

• Outfit: a plain, black dress, with a white collar, and a skirt that goes down to her ankles

• A pink armband

She's very shy, and very quiet. But she cares a lot about enforcing the rules.

She was elected Captain by a one-vote margin over Ryu.

~·~

Yuna Koyama

• Ultimate Dietician

• 4'8"

• Eyes: violet

• Hair: violet; tied up in a ponytail

• Outfit: a white lab coat that goes down to her knees

• Tiny

She can be pretty annoying—especially if she finds you eating junk food.

~·~

Momoka Ito

• Ultimate Perfumer

• 5'2"

• Eyes: dark-brown

• Hair: blue; frayed, tangled, and disastrously unkempt

• Outfit: a yellow sweatshirt that's too large, and a navy-blue skirt with little tears in it

• Looks like a mess, but smells amazing

She seems to barely have a grip on reality. As if she's drifting through life on good smells alone.

~·~

Male students:

~·~

Hiroto Oshiro

• Ultimate Attorney

• 6'1"

• Eyes: blue

• Hair: dark-brown; combed back a bit

• Outfit: a black suit, and a navy-blue tie

• Tall and broad-shouldered

He hates seeing people locked in a cage, even if they've done something wrong.

~·~

Ryu Minamoto

• Ultimate Yakuza

• 5'9"

• Eyes: green

• Hair: dirty blonde; greased back

• Outfit: an expensive-looking striped suit, and a black tie

• Looks tough—but he has a charming smile

Heir to the Minamoto Clan. He's pretty friendly, despite his family's notoriety.

He was appointed First Second Mate by Captain Mizuki.

~·~

Kenji Sasaki

• Ultimate Linguist

• 5'8"

• Eyes: brown

• Hair: black; slightly unkempt

• Outfit: a normal, dark gakuran uniform

• An all-around regular-looking guy

He speaks over 300 languages—but he's not much for conversation.

~·~

Jeffrey Silverstein

• Ultimate Kabuki Actor

• 5'9"

• Eyes: blue

• Hair: brown; short

• Outfit: white t-shirt, and blue gym shorts

• Strong-looking, though not too bulky

A good-natured, optimistic American who's loved kabuki theater since he was a child.

~·~

Tsubasa Haneda

• Ultimate Speedrunner

• 5'4"

• Eyes: green

• Hair: yellowish-green; spiky; sticks out in all directions

• Outfit: baggy jeans, and a loose, black t-shirt with a game controller design on it

• Several earrings. A sort of punk vibe.

A gamer who's easy to get along with. He's very straightforward, and tends to speak his mind.

~·~

Jun Mujun

• Ultimate Hacker

• 6'2"

• Eyes: brown

• Hair: black with blue highlights; hanging around his head in big, messy locks

• Outfit: jeans, and a leather jacket

• Tall and lanky. Bags under his eyes.

An enigmatic genius. It's hard to faze him.

~·~

Takeru Tao

• Ultimate Child Caregiver

• (not a ninja)

• 5'7"

• Eyes: violet

• Hair: violet; sticking straight up

• Outfit: a full black bodysuit, and a green camo vest

• Headband has a metal plate over the forehead; the Hope's Peak crest is carved into it

He seems to think he's a ninja. Kids love it. His parents don't.

~·~

Shingo Chiba

• Ultimate Accountant

• 5'11"

• Eyes: gray

• Hair: black; well-groomed

• Outfit: a black suit with a bowtie

• Thin-rimmed glasses

An orphaned prodigy. He's literally accounted for everything.

He was appointed Quartermaster by Captain Mizuki.