My training with Baghra was intense but I got the point of I could use my powers back to back without fainting. A blessing I discovered over time and I was just glad that it all worked out for me. When I reached the age of sixteen I was allowed to be part of the 2nd army, I already lived in the little palace so that was easy. They had me and a group of people in my age range measured for our Kefta and once they knew our size we were given one. Since the only thing they knew I was a tidemaker, my Kefta had the symbol for a tidemaker.
a half-truth is better than a lie. I thought
Training on the grounds of the little palace I was able to figure out where I fit in. Most tidemakers avoided me cause of my father's indiscretion of being a Grisha whose power was unknown. It didn't bother me one bit since I knew he had decided to be undeclared to protect himself. Their letters helped but I missed them so much it was hard not to want to cry. Still I was able to make friends with a fellow tidemaker and an inferni their names are nadia and Marie.
"Don't let them get to you, we all know that there is more going on then they can see." Marie said
I laughed a bit knowing that I could relax and enjoy my time without having to worry. Still I wanted to show someone the truth. Baghra wasn't my crutch anymore and I wouldn't let my powers control me though they grew in power everyday. While we did our first practice of power with each other then training lessons with Botkin I just shook my head when it was a fail.
Walking back in when dinner was ready I sat with them at the Etherealki table. We all had our own table depending on our Kefta. Etherealki was where the tidemaker,squallers, and Inferni sat. with the General's black empty chair connecting the table to another one for the Corporalki. Then there was the ones for the Materialki. General Kirigan never ate with us so it was easy.
After a few days of training Baghra decided I needed more private training by myself and wrote a note to give to Botkin. I didn't read it but when I went out for training I showed it to Botkin when he was reading it he seemed skeptical but he let me go without even questioning. after training I met up with marie and Nadia showing them the power I had.
"You're a dual-summoner?" Marie said shocked
"I can't let General Kirigan know.." I said
"Well he will find out eventually Amira." Nadia said
"I know and when that day comes I will take responsibility." I said
This went for months but now Marie and Nadia knew that I was really doing practice on my own. It was lonely being the only dual-summoner of my kind but it was my burden to bear and I was just wanting to keep my powers strong. I had to so we could one day rid ourselves of the fold but Baghra kept talking like she had a son and I wanted to know more but she was going to keep it secret.
I turned seventeen the next year and I still stayed within my two friends group. They had proven to me during this time telling them the truth was the right way to go about it the way I did. Everytime we'd came out for training General Kirigan had never been here to see us and I was able to sneak off for my private training.
"We've been part of the 2nd army for a year now." Marie said "How are you feeling with your power Amira?"
"I feel better, I feel stronger everyday but I still think I should hold back." I said
"Holding back doesn't help you." Marie pointed out
I worried about what people would say if they found out the truth one day knowing that sun summoner was a myth. Still after we left we spent time going to the events the grand palace had. As long as we had on our Kefta we had access to the grounds. I was relaxed as long as I was with them and knew it was great.
As we went about similar things to yesterday and I was glad that it wasn't going to be as bad. I wanted to make my friends proud and I wanted to end the fold if I could. Still as I was in my private training area I broke down crying as I felt so alone. I wanted my father to be there to help me instead of being on my own but it wasn't an option. I wiped my eyes and went back to training long and hard.
When it was getting late I stopped and ran to catch up with the others as we headed back into the little palace. I was able to avoid the general for over a year now so I knew I was doing something right. I was glad he didn't come out but that didn't mean that he wouldn't come out and check on the Grisha in the 2nd army. We went to our rooms and I got a bath my mind going over my thoughts. Sleep was something I was glad I could get any time during the night.
Breakfast never changed it was always the same we all ate at our tables and he was never there. I knew he didn't know exactly who I was he'd only seen half my face that day I was brought here. I knew there was something in here calling to me or more to my sun summoner side but I didn't know what.
"The black General is not eating with us again." Marie said
"He can't eat with his fellow Grisha Soldiers but he can choose our meals." I said a little annoyed how the Grisha Soldiers had to eat alone but he couldn't brace his soldiers with his presence.
"that is the way things work here. We'll be working on things for several years before we're assigned where we will go." Nadia said
where we'll be assigned.. I thought
It never crossed my mind that we would all not be going to the same place when it came to the way things were. We'd heard about the Fjerdians who have hunted down Grisha and killed them. Some of us would be assigned in Fjerda when we were done and those selected would be in the general's service.
if I keep my secret to the end where will I be? Fjerda, Shu han, or in the general's service. Baghra can't hide me forever. I thought
After breakfast, Marie and Nadia seemed to notice I had a lot on my mind when it came to the future of well all of us. I had trust in a small group of people about my identity of being a dual summoner. Marie put a hand on my shoulder which made me look at her knowing that I was still feeling alone.
"Think of it this way, if you remain in secret you should be assigned with one of us but if you are found out someday..you'll probably be in the general's service and remain in the little palace." Marie said
"Being in the general's service would be your safest option. Fjerdians are ruthless." Nadia said "The little palace is safest for you."
I didn't know if they were trying to make me feel better or they knew the truth that I was scared of the pressure. Since I was brought by my Grisha parents to the little palace not having to have an audience with the king and queen was the best yet. I knew that could not be avoided forever and I knew one day if I was found out then the Queen's tailor would start to be around more than what she was when she checked on all of us.
