Can You Keep A Secret?
Sinking her head into her hands En let out a slow sigh, her red hair pooling forward over her slender fingers as she tilted her head downwards. A sliver of silver danced on the lower lid of her bright eyes before gradually falling away as a perfect tear drop and falling upon her school blouse. The confusion that wrought itself inside of her was almost too much to cope with; reluctantly she let out another brief sob.
At first everything had seemed so simple. They'd arrived on this planet with a name that was unknown to themselves, in order to harvest energy for their matriarchal figure of the doom tree. Faceless individuals had lost consciousness, under their tyranny of Cardian attacks. Their onslaught in the search for energy had rendered countless casualties, and yet neither Ail nor En had felt any sense of remorse. The anonymous victims failed to even tug upon the Ailens heartstrings, and so they had continued forward with their quest, sucking energy for the inhabitants of the earth all the time believing in their ultimate goal of reviving the Makaiju.
En couldn't remember when it all began to change. She could no longer recall the first smile that had escaped from her lips, turning them up at the corners until she regained control of her facial features once more, and even then she couldn't hide the sparkle that lit up her eyes for that brief momentary mirth.
She couldn't remember when her heart first began to feel lighter with a vague sense of happiness, or when it first began to sink so deep that it felt it would hit her stomach whenever she thought of the pain she was causing for her beloved tree.
Her mind had slowly been infested by these blots that covered her usual thought processes. She'd never prided herself on how she ruled straight from the head, whilst the heart lay dormant beneath her Ailen skin, because she'd never questioned it, it was how she'd always been as far back as she could recall. The only exception to her headstrong rule had been her softness for her brother that lapped at the edges of her soul and pushed her along with his thoughts, creating in her a firm accomplice for whatever his desires may be.
Ail and En's love for each other remained a solid foundation for who En was, and how she felt, and it had been due to that relationship that she had gradually become aware of the changes that were gradually growing through her, like roots of the Makaiju, sending tendrils to capture her heart and ensnare her mind.
At first, when En had began to analyse her feelings she'd drawn knowledge from her only affection for Ail, and found the nearest male equivalent in whom she could daydream about and attempt to transfer her emotions upon. It hadn't been an accident that Mamoru had began to feature in her dreams, his attitudes had been so similar to her own brother's, that En had decided that if she could only channel her new found feelings towards one person then she could fully concentrate on him, and gradually steady the fluttering of her heart that had, slowly but surely, become a part of her everyday life. If she was going to be able to still lead with her head, she'd need to find someone as close to her brother as possible, so that she could continue being in control.
As the days passed though, En reAilsed that her efforts were all in vain. Her heart still pumped irregularly, blushes still spread over her cheeks and she began to fear that deep down inside she was falling in love with the Earth. In those days she began to keep a closer eye on Mamoru, telling herself that if only she could want him then she could regain her old composure, however every time she looked into his deep brown eyes, she could no longer continue to lie to herself. She passed by Mamoru with the same speed that Mamoru and Ail began to spend time with each other, the signs and the chemistry between the two boys were impossible for even En's Ailen heart not to recognise.
En pulled herself away from the couple, floundering in her own emotion as she felt her brother quickly tugging away from her, wrapping his arms around his new companion, tearing away parts of his soul that they had shared and liberally showering Mamoru with them.
The constant presence of her failed plan, and failing love haunted her, and she began to turn inwards to the turmoil of emotional tendrils that still attacked from her insides. The lack of newly drained energy weakening her already tired body, constantly weary from the mental and emotional ambush. Dragging herself from her shared apartment En had forced herself to walk the short route towards the school, seeking refuge from her pains in the empty classrooms that the weekend brought.
Her body slumping into the chair, En only had time to scan the room briefly for other signs of life, before the first tear fell from her glittering eyes. Images assaulted her behind her closing eyelids, the shimmer of the fresh dew on the grasses of her home, the splendour of the Makaiju in full bloom, and in the distance she could hear voices. En raised her hands covering her eyes, and listened, the voices swept through the classroom on the breeze and for a second she could feel her heart melt as she pictured herself with more siblings, brothers and sisters of varying ages, all playing and growing with the Makaiju. Blinking behind her hands En strained her ears, desperate to hear more, to work out what the voices were saying, desperate to give some foundation to her wild thoughts. This time though, the voices were different, all female, and getting closer. En looked up, frantically trying to plan an escape route, and raise her exhausted body.
Suddenly there came the noise of footsteps progressively getting louder, the owner of the steps evidently rushing along the corridor towards En's almost vacant room. She heard someone's breathing heavy from the distance that they'd ran, and suddenly the door separating herself from the mysterious runner was thrown open, as a female figure pushed her way forwards.
At first the other didn't seem to notice the presence of anyone else in the room. En closed her eyes tightly, desperately hoping that she wouldn't be seen, when the sound of the other speaking her name reached her ears.
'Natsumi?' The other girl asked curiously
En kept her head down, and worked in her mind on finding the owner of the voice, in her weakened state her mind moved slowly.
'Natsumi!' The cry came again, this time it was much closer, and as En began to recognise the owner's voice Usagi had already reached En, pulling her hands away from her face and holding them in her own.
'Natsumi, are you okay? You shouldn't be here on a weekend, and, Natsumi, why are your hands all wet?'
Slowly En raised her head, cheeks red from crying and the embarrassment of being caught in such a state.
'Oh Natsumi, it's okay.'
Usagi's soft voice rolled over En, and gradually she brought herself up to Usagi's height. As she stood up, she registered, somewhere at the back of her head that the other girl still remained the keeper of her hands. En's heart fluttered rapidly within the weak covering of her chest, as she teetered unsteadily on her feet. Falling forwards En found herself cushioned by the soft swell of Usagi's breasts. The scent of Usagi's skin beneath the gentle fabric of her clothing filled En's head like a perfumed gas. En, cradled against Usagi, remembered the earlier voices, not those of the Usagi's friends, but the ones of her siblings, her memory assaulted by different visions of a time when she was happy, and full of energy, when she had loved and been loved back by more than just one brother. Sniffing her tears back En took in the scent of Usagi and in her mind pictured the soft and fragile blooms of the great Makaiju in full bloom. Hiccupping En pushed herself towards Usagi, causing them both to stumble, and fall towards the floor.
En landed, her chest against Usagi's, their hearts beating a rapid tattoo together, their arms and legs tangled and their faces just inches apart. En blinked, her cheeks on fire with embarrassment, as she looked at the other girl beneath her. Unable to move, their eyes locked, both pairs shining with secrets and something else. En reached upwards, curling her hand behind the back of Usagi's head, intent upon reading the sparkle that decorated Usagi's eyes, the same glint of light that she'd found in her own growing steadily each day she looked into the mirror. She looked, into their ocular depths, and understood, the sentiment that she could see, the feelings that had burst through her own heart like so many tentacle roots, was that feeling of love.
En quietly let out a gasp of air, and in that moment Usagi, pushed forwards, catching En by surprise, and pushing her tender lips towards En's own.
The memories flooded back to En's mind, the feelings of happiness and joy, the energy that came from truly being in love. Sinking into Usagi's kiss, her face flashed momentarily green, as Usagi's fingers wrapped themselves into the shock of pink hair that fell from En's head.
