Glossary: Moye Serdtse - My heart,

We made preparations before heading to the skiff, since I was just observing this time I was allowed to wear whatever I wanted but Genya had to do my hair. I still had to represent being Sankta Amira to the people. I disliked being referred to as a saint when I was just a Grisha girl with a gift. I waited a bit knowing that it was his plan but since we were here at my family home he hadn't rushed me out.

"Are you crossing the skiff with my daughter again?" My Father asked as we were eating. Alina seemed hesitant but I assured her there wouldn't be an issue. Aleksander nods "Amira is merely going to observe that Alina can do as asked. If she struggles, I need Amira with me on the skiff to protect the nobles." Aleksander said. I ate but I knew the truth but wouldn't dare rat him out to my family. He was about to make a big move but still, some risks came with that.

Soon, it was time we left and I hugged everyone before we headed by carriage to the skiff. Horses were provided for those who couldn't sit in there, Aleksander merely seemed to be looking at me. I wouldn't look at him for what I knew was coming, the first General would soon die. Alina was first to break the silence "So why are you both tense?" Alina asked, I looked at her knowing I hadn't actually felt good since leaving the little palace but I'd just taken it that I'd been working too much. "Nah, we're fine. We talked." I assured her

More time passed and the fold was just within reach as we all got out, I saw Ivan there as he bowed to both of us. "Moi soverenyi, Moya soverenyi , you both have arrived." Ivan said as I walked past him. I led Alina to a tent but stopped before I looked back. "Send David to the tent." I said as he nodded without a word. I knew with Aleksander around Ivan would keep his mouth shut. As we walked into the tent I saw Genya there waiting as she walked over looking at me.

"Are you ok?" Genya asked knowing this was the second time I'd disappeared and I smiled at her. "I'm fine, just maybe I ate something wrong." I said as she had us sit and got to work, my mind was elsewhere thinking of the possibility of what I wanted was within my grasp. Alina was done up first in all the sun summoner stuff that I merely watched then when she was gone a few Grisha escorted her out as Genya came over to work on me.

"You look like you're glowing Amira, maybe the saints have been listening to the people." Genya teased as she got me ready for the skiff. I wasn't the one doing the tunnel but I still needed to represent being the Dual Summoner as I saw she had a few more golden hairpins and used them on my hair. Unlike Alina's whose hair was gone mine was done in a way that had half my hair up and the other half down. "General Kirigan's plan will come to pass soon, right? Then you get what you desire." Genya asked as I shrugged a bit. We heard the sound of a horse approaching as I got up and saw Baghra come into the tent.

"Baghra, what is going on?" I asked as she handed me a note, "Just in case things go wrong, this is the name of someone who can help you until I can get you back to the little palace." She whispered but as she looked at me she had a thoughtful look. One that in the time I'd known her seemed unrealistic but she meant it this time like she knew something. "You know if anything happens to him, I'll make sure you are kept safe no matter what." Baghra said before leaving

How ominous... I thought

Still, as I walked out there joining everyone we started getting on the skiff. Genya was to stay with the others but Ivan had to come as always. Aleksander led me to a place to sit where he felt I would be safest from the volcra as we started going in. I remembered when I went in the last time how worried I got as I noticed Alina was tied to the deck, Mal was nowhere in sight.

What did he do? I thought

I noticed Marie and Nadia laid low within the distance that they could watch my movements and Nico must have been below deck. Something felt very wrong as we went in but I chose to ignore it. Noticing who was on the skiff I recognized Jesper quickly so Inej and Kaz had to be close. When they opened the hatch going down I looked at the girls motioning them to follow it was dark and honestly the best way to survive as we made it down there. I noticed the group was planning to fight the Volcra.

"You don't have enough bullets, you might not make it." I said as I got their attention as they noticed me. I had a way to go and they seemed caught off guard "You followed us?" Inej asked as she slightly bowed. "Please, I don't need that. Alina is tied to the skiff, something he never did with me." I said as Kaz walked forward "Whose group are you in, Amira?"

"I'm Kirigan's wife." I said as Kaz backed up and the group seemed shocked. "Honestly, even though I am his wife I can sway him. I want to free Alina from the skiff but I can't directly do that. I don't want my husband dead but I also can't atone for this behavior." I said to them as I heard the sound of a gun and someone pulling him down before I turned to see Mal and Nico. "Amira is going about this right, don't stop her." Nico said

We all divided a plan on how to manage this which was harder than I thought but the three of us snuck back up without being noticed. Alina was getting scared and she didn't seem to know what to do as I saw Aleksander put a hand on her shoulder helping her with the tunnel. "Oh wow." Nadia said as I knew it was impressive but she lacked the knowledge on doing it as he let go. I was able to sneak over when Aleksander had his back and cinder the rope with light as I grabbed Alina getting her to the back.

"What are you doing?" Alina asked as I looked at her, "Keep your attention on the light." I said as she nodded, focusing while we kept moving. I wasn't able to go far cause I felt pain as I fell to my knees clutching my chest. Looking up at where Zoya was, I saw a heartrender. "Enough!" Aleksander's voice said as I gasped, able to breathe as he made me stand and look at him. "Why Amira? You knew very well this is the plan." Aleksander said as I looked at him and shook my head. "This isn't you, it's not who you are." I pleaded to him

Somehow I didn't think it'd work but he pulled me with him as Alina had to keep the light. I was taken to the bottom part of the ship and he made me stay there. I couldn't figure out why but I guess because I influenced him. "Maybe you're right, but there are more important matters. You're glowing, so your safety is a high priority." Aleksander said as I didn't get what was with this glowing comment.

Nadia and Marie were sent down to sit with me as I sighed hearing the volcra up there and waiting it out. "What does it mean when people say you're glowing?" I asked, Marie and Nadia, looked at me then at each other before looking back. "uh well, it's a reference sometimes of possibly being with child." Marie said as I was shocked. I realized why he was so angry it seemed, it wasn't with me but that heartrender.

What if I am? or what if he's lying to keep me down here? I thought

We felt the skiff stop and I knew it now that we had to get up there. I got up regardless of what I was told as we tried to get it open. It wouldn't budge at first but when we did get it open I was shocked. West Ravka was gone, clouded in shadows as I put my hands together and raised my hand sending my light to try to save some but felt someone pull my hand down.

"Sorry, Moye Serdtse but this is what you already knew would happen." He whispered to me as he led me to the front of the skiff. All the volcra was going after those people, I tried to do it again but felt lightheaded as Aleksander caught me and set me down. The sound of gunshots and people fighting were evident but it wasn't till later when I felt someone carrying me that I woke up. Looking up I saw Nico was holding me in his arms while he walked.

"N-Nico?" I said as he noticed while sitting me by fire. Once there I noticed who was all sitting there among us. Kaz, Inej, and Jesper were sitting on one side, Alina and Mal were standing together, and looking next to me I saw Marie and Nadia giving sympathetic looks.

"Where is.." I started but the two girls just shook their heads, I questioned if I was going to be a mother with a soulmate dead or left behind. I cried for a little while as Nico held me and calmed me down. "Hey, it probably was a lie but who knows. One day you'll know for sure and I'm sure one day you will be that mom you want to be." Nico said

I nod as Marie and Nadia gave me a change of clothes telling me Baghra had given this to them. I went and changed as I took the golden pins out of my hair knowing this was going to have to help us. I looked at the paper knowing this name would give us a place to stay.

People make it like he's gone but in my heart...I know he's alive...I thought

After changing, Alina gave the trio her headpiece that had gems on it so that would cover their expenses. I couldn't stay on this side of Ravka for now so we all went to the nearest boat. Rumors started to float around and I kept quiet. By using one of the hairpins I was able to get the four of us passage. I opened the paper seeing that the person we were going to be taking shelter from didn't even live in Ravka.

So I need to find someone named Rose and she'll give us shelter till Baghra comes for us...if not Aleksander. I thought

I heard Alina talking to Mal "someone has to get stronger to tear down the fold, so now we just wait. Especially since the darkling is dead." Alina said

Really? She assumes but this is going to be for the best to get out of here. I thought

"Well, here is to freedom for a short time." Marie said as I merely looked at her shocked by those words Freedom was what I wanted and in a way, this was the start of my freedom. The traveling was horrible and I just wanted to lie down or do anything. We ended up following Alina through ketterdam and onto another ship where after another sailing we got to a place that was ok.

We traveled for a while that I wasn't sure where we'd go but as we walked I accidentally bumped into a woman. "I am so sorry." I said as she looked at the group of us. "You are Baghra's students, correct?" The woman asked as I nodded. "I'm Rose, please follow me." She said as she led us to a place that was big enough to house people.

I hesitated as we walked but soon we entered as she gestured for us to make ourselves at home. "We'll have to find you some work around here." Rose said as I nodded. "The man in your group, we can find him something first but you girls will have to keep your powers hidden for now." Rose said as I knew that'd make us look bad..possibly weak so we had to use them in private. She looked at all of us but when her eyes landed on me she seemed to be thinking.

"Are you Baghra's daughter-in-law?" Rose asked, I nod knowing not many people knew of the wedding. "Then you stay inside at all times, your friends find work but since your husband just did something big in Ravka you can't be seen for awhile." Rose said as I nodded. "Yes. Ma'am." I said

This is going to be a long wait until Aleksander or Baghra shows up. I thought