Chapter 5

"You WHAT!" Gordo wasn't mad at Matt, he just didn't want her to know.

"Well I had a message to call my mom, and while I was on the phone I said I saw you here. Sorry man, I didn't know." Matt was looking really worried that Gordo was mad.

"It's alright man. I'm not mad; I just didn't want her to find out, not like that." Gordo patted him on the shoulder to reassure him.

"I'm really sorry. I just thought she would be excited to know you were here. That's all."

"Well was she?"

"Yeah." Matt laughed. "She said if she looked better she would come over and see you, but she said she was wearing crappy cloths. You know Lizzie."
"Yeah." Gordo laughed. He wished so much that she would have come, but still was very happy she didn't.

"Well I really need to get back to work. Again, I'm sorry."
"No it's cool." Gordo walked back to his seat and finished his lunch with his mom. He was trying to hurry her along, just in case Lizzie did decide to come in.

Lizzie never showed up by the time Gordo and his mother walked out of the restaurant, which was a great relief to Gordo. He just didn't want to meet her for the first time in five years at the little dinner. He wanted it to be a little more special, but he didn't know what. He just had this picture in his head of them two meeting each other and holding each other in their arms. It was a fantasy that he knew was just a fairy tale, and that real life didn't happen like that.

He and his mother made their back towards their house with a little more small talk about his dad's new job as a psychology professor at a local university, and her job with the state. Neither of which Gordo was very interested in, but he made it seem like he was for his mother's sake. He just couldn't get his mind off of Lizzie. It was all he could think about, and it was driving him crazy.

"Gordo, you're not listening to a thing I'm saying are you? His mother said, snapping him out of deep thought.

"Umm… yeah. Sorry I was just thinking."
"About what?" She didn't even need to ask, she already knew.

"Nothin mom. Just relaxin that's all."
"You're thinking about Lizzie aren't you?" Gordo was stunned. How could she have known that?

"NO! I was just thinking about how Matt had grown up that's all." Gordo snapped at her.

"Whoa! Ok, I'm sorry I even brought it up. It's just that I know you left her on bad terms…"
"Mom, please. I don't need you to analyze me. I'm fine. Yes I left her on bad terms, in a bad way, but I'm over it. I am. OK?" Gordo's mom looked at him with sad eyes.

"Well she's not Gordo. She's not." That was all that was between the two of them the rest of the way home. Gordo couldn't help but think about what his mom had said. "Is she really not over it? Did I hurt her that bad?" He thought.

When they made it back home Gordo was feeling really bad. His mom didn't say a word to him when she got out of the car and went into the house. Gordo followed her with his head down feeling very low.

"Mom." Gordo let out a huge sigh. "I'm sorry." He said as he reached out and pulled her toward him. She wrapped her arms around him as he started to sob.

"Its ok hon." She stood there holding her son, understanding why he was crying. "You need to make things right with her."

"I know mom." He stood up and whipped the tears from his eyes. He was feeling very ashamed for showing such emotions. He hadn't cried in front of anyone since he could remember. He was supposed to be the tough guy, the man with no emotion. He turned and walked away from his mother to his room.

"GOD DAMN IT!" He yelled as he slammed the door, and threw himself onto his bed. "This is exactly why I didn't want to be here." He thought. "I didn't want to go through all of this crap again." He closed his eyes and drifted asleep.

He was awakened by a tap on his door. He rolled over to see what time it was, and saw he had fallen asleep for about an hour.

"Yeah?" He called out. The door opened and he saw his dad step in the room. Gordo stiffened.

"Your mom said you were upset and had been in her for awhile. You ok?" Gordo noticed that his dad was being a little more soft than normal.

"Yeah I'm fine. I just dozed off for a bit." Gordo was trying to avoid any eye contact with his dad, who was just standing there at the door.

"Ok…umm…well...see you for dinner then." His dad said awkwardly and turned and walked out the door. Gordo sighed as he could feel the tension between him and his dad leave. He hated how their relationship had changed. He knew his dad was disappointed in him, but there was nothing he could do about it now. His dad and him used to be almost like best friends. He was at every one of Gordo's basketball games in highschool, helped him workout and practice, and helped him with his homework and any other school activity he had. His dad was always there, until Gordo screwed up. Until he let everyone down that mattered to him.

He sat in the back of the room at the small square desk, with his two #2 pencils, calculator and test. He took a deep breath, and tried to listen to the direction but he just couldn't pay attention to the young lady at the front of the room. He had too many other things on his mind.

"Ok, when you are ready, slid your pencil in the booklet and break the seal. Open the first page, read the directions, and then you may begin. You Have 90 minutes to finish the first section. Ok, go." The young lady said, and Gordo did as he was told. He opened the book and looked that the place labeled 'Test Number- A234'. He looked at his calculator and pushed the memory button. It took a few seconds and then many numbers and letters started popping up. He looked at the very top of the screen, 'Answers for test A234'. He took another deep breath.

"Am I really going to do this?" He thought to himself. "I went through a lot of work to make this work, I can't really back out now. He was taking the ACT at a local college, and he had all the answers. He had paid one of the students that working for the college as a proctor to get the test that he wanted. She made sure that he would sit at a certain desk and get test A234, which Gordo had found the answers to. He still couldn't believe he had decided to do it. He knew he could get a good score on the test without cheating, but he just didn't want to take that chance with the scholarship on the line. He wanted his score to be the best, so he could stand out among the other candidates up for the money. The basketball scholarship, if he got it, would take care of a lot of his tuition, but not all of it. He could also hold the money back for grad school if he wanted. There were so many reasons he needed the money, and he was willing to do what he had to do to get it.

He turned the page and looked at the first question. He read it and knew the answer without looking at his calculator, but he looked it just to make sure. It was the same answer. "Ok, this it. Am I going to do it?" He thought. He started through the test circling all the right answers, making sure to miss one or two here and there, just so it wasn't perfect, but darn near. He was doing it; he was cheating his way to one of the most important test of his life so far, which was something that he had never done before.

Gordo lowered his head as he sat on his bed. He didn't know that his life was going to change so much after that day. He was sorry that he cheated, but he was almost sorrier that he got caught. He could still see the man's hand as it slammed down on Gordo's test.

Apparently when he wasn't looking as a professor had come in to check on the young proctor and all the testers. He noticed that Gordo kept looking at his calculator on the reading part. As he walked toward him, Gordo finally noticed and shut his calculator off, but it didn't help, he had been caught.

Gordo stood up and shook his head. It was only the first mistake that he had made that year. He walked out of his room and headed to the kitchen. He wanted to go apologize to his dad, but he knew it wouldn't help. He had hurt his parents so much with what he did, even when he tried to explain to them that he had done it for them, so they would have to pay for college. He crossed the living room and found his dad standing in the kitchen reading the paper. Gordo froze as his dad lowered the paper and looked at him.

"I'm…going to go to Miranda's." Gordo said, almost wanting to apologize, but couldn't find the courage. "I don't know if I'll be back for dinner."

"Ok." His dad said and turned back to the paper. Gordo walked to his car beating himself up for not saying something to his dad. Not only did he need to make things right with Lizzie, but he needed to do it with is Dad as well.