To…. tired…. (or perhaps lazy?) to…write….proper….author's….notes.
TRYING TO FIX THINGS
Akemi cringed in embarrassment as another couple walked by giving her date, Jatsuma, funny looks. They were in a fairly upscale restaurant, the kind of place you might wear a tie and collared shirt to. Or at least some dress pants. She herself had bought a new dress and shoes just for the occasion. So why then was Jatsuma wearing a soggy orange hoodie, jeans and tennis shoes that 'squeshed' when he walked? For an added bonus, he smelled like fish water.
Jatsuma tapped his leg impatiently and hunched over the table, resting his chin in a hand that was propped up on the table. I still don't know why Razor's parents raised her as a boy in the first place. What could possibly be gained by it? The Amazons are a female dominated society anyway so you'd think a girl would be better.
"Jatsuma, are you okay?" Akemi asked in a worried tone. "You've been awfully quiet."
"Oh, yeah, great! Really great!" Jatsuma quickly sat up straight and put on a big smile.
"You just seem a little tense."
"Who me?" He laughed as he pointed to himself. "Come on, I'm not tense. I'm a laid-back kind of guy! If anything, being out with such a beautiful girl just makes me a little nervous."
"Oh Jatsuma!" Akemi sighed happily. "I'm sorry, you just seemed so distant. But you don't need to feel nervous with me." She put her hands over her cheeks to cover her blush.
"I know that now. Thank you for being so understanding Akemi. Spending time with you makes me feel so…comfortable."
Akemi blushed as red as a tomato. "Th- Thank you. That's so sweet!"
"Think nothing of it." Jatsuma said with a toothy smile.
A minute of silence later Jatsuma started tapping his leg impatiently again. Akemi blinked. Poor guy must be really nervous. He's so sweet and innocent.
Jatsuma glared down at his soup. I can't believe another girl is hitting on my little sister. That's just too weird. His eyes widened as a thought struck him. Wait, what if Razor is at home hitting on Makoto right now?
BACK AT THE TENDO DOJO
Razor sat on top of the roof of the dojo looking out towards the street, awaiting Jatsuma's return. Dusk had fallen over the city and cast everything in an orange glow.
If that ass has told anyone my secret… She clutched viciously at the air as if strangling someone. When Jatsuma left it didn't seem like he was going to tell, at least not yet. But Razor couldn't let anything jeopardize her mission, especially that egotistical, immature, meddlesome moron.
It was then that Razor noticed someone coming down the street and turning into the walkway to the Saotome house. At first she thought it was Jatsuma but it turned out to be Shampoo. She was dragging along two teenage girls towards the house, with an extreme look of resolve on her face.
Razor sighed in irritation. She didn't want to deal with Shampoo right now; this day had been too long as it was. Without a look back, Razor stood up and jumped away from house to house. She noticed a wooded area not far away that looked like a park; she could camp out there for the night.
"RANMA!" Shampoo burst open the front door and ran inside, dragging along her two daughters with her.
"Mom! They have a door bell!" Lotion yelled as she was pulled along. "You're being ridiculous!"
"I didn't even get a chance to finish my makeup!" Luffa complained.
Akane stuck her head out of the kitchen curiously. "What the-? Shampoo, just how often to do have to visit?" She asked in an annoyed tone.
Shampoo glared at her. "I'm here to see Ranma."
"What else is new? Come on." Akane sighed as she led the way down the hall.
"You can let go now, we're here already!" Lotion said as she pulled away from her mother's grasp.
"Mom!" Daichi called down the stairs as he walked down them. "I can't find the cotton swabs! AAHH!" He tripped when he saw Lotion and fell the rest of the way down the steps. "Hey Lotion!" He stood up stiffly.
"Hey Daichi." Lotion said, half amused and half exasperated. Luffa just rolled her eyes at his clumsiness.
"Is Razor still here?" Shampoo asked as she looked around, as if expecting the accused to materialize out of the walls.
"I haven't seen him since this morning." Akane answered as continued to walk down the hall and out towards the dojo with Shampoo, Lotion, Luffa and Daichi following after her.
"He not with Makoto, is he?" Shampoo asked quickly.
"Of course not, Makoto went out to see Iikiba a little while ago. I think she was taking him dinner."
Shampoo breathed a sigh of relief. "Good. Now we can fix things once and for all!"
Akane raised an eyebrow. "What does that mean?"
"I talk to Ranma."
"Right, right." Akane snorted and scowled.
They reached the dojo and Akane opened to door. Inside, Ranma sat looking quite bored as Kiyoshi asked about the finer points of kicking.
"I tend to kick at a 120 degree to my other leg. But maybe a 130 degree would be more effective and cause more damage. It's been bothering me all day long! But I'm sure you know what's best, right Sensei?" Kiyo asked earnestly.
Ranma sighed. "I suppose it would depend on the height of the person. But you don't really need-"
Kiyoshi gasped loudly, interrupting Ranma. "Of course! That's so wise!"
Ranma rolled his eyes and noticed their visitors walking over to them. It was a welcomed distraction. "Hey Akane! What's going on?" He quickly stood up and went to greet them, much to Kiyoshi's disappointment.
"Ask her." Akane said in an irritated tone as she pointed to Shampoo.
"Oh Ranma!" Shampoo cried. "It so horrible! The only way for me to rejoin the tribe is to have replacement marriage! But I can't allow Razor to marry Makoto!"
"Uhh…" Ranma couldn't think of anything consoling to say.
"Yeah, we've heard it all before." Akane growled.
"Mom! You're embarrassing us!" Luffa yelled.
"This is so stupid." Lotion said with her arms crossed. "Why would you even WANT to go back to that oppressive society? Even if they did allow you to go back, I'm certainly not going."
Shampoo turned to her daughter, smiling. "Well of course you wouldn't want to leave your husband."
"My what?" Lotion asked in a monotone voice and with narrowed eyes. Daichi fell over in surprise.
"If the tribe wants a replacement marriage then that's what we give them!" Shampoo declared, clutching her fists in determination. "One of you two could marry one of Ranma's sons! That should count too!"
Everyone stared at Shampoo for a moment with their mouths hanging open.
Luffa blinked. "That's a GREAT idea!"
"No it's not! That's a HORRIBLE idea! You can't just decide who we're going to marry!' Lotion shouted angrily.
"Well you don't even have to worry about it because I was going to get Jatsuma to marry me eventually anyway." Luffa said with a smirk. Then she turned to Ranma and Akane. "Where is he now anyway?"
"Uh, he went out on a date." Akane answered.
Ranma sighed. "That explains why the roof didn't get fixed." He said as he looked up at the two holes in the ceiling.
Luffa's eye twitched and her expression changed from hopeful to furious. "ARGH! THAT TWO TIMER!"
"He... he'll be… back soon though." Shampoo said hesitantly.
"I WOULDN'T MARRY HIM IF HE WERE THE LAST MAN ON EARTH!" Luffa screeched and sat down sulkily on the floor, away from the group.
"O-kay." Ranma said with a slim smile of relief.
Shampoo then turned to Lotion with a smile. "Well then…"
"No." Lotion said.
"Come on! You like Daichi right?" Shampoo indicated the other Saotome boy.
"Eep!" Daichi jumped back, blushing.
"Yeah, as a FRIEND." Lotion said in frustration. "Daichi, tell her how ridiculous she is being!"
"Y- y- yeah. Ra- ridiculous." Daichi stammered, trying to hide his red face and teary eyes.
Luckily for him, right them the door to the dojo flew open and Cologne stood there looking irritable. "Shampoo! I told you to let it go!"
Shampoo crossed her arms defiantly. "Hmph. No! This idea is as good as the Council's! In fact it makes more sense!"
Cologne sighed angrily. "I've told you, Lotion and Luffa aren't official Amazons. It wouldn't count."
"I'm not about to let Curler fix my mistakes! I'll fix them myself!" Shampoo shouted.
"You mean we will." Lotion rolled her eyes.
Shampoo rounded on her daughter with a glare. "It's easy for you to make fun! You no know Curler like I do! She's a monster!"
"You haven't even seen her in over twenty years!" Lotion shouted.
"People like that don't change!" Shampoo insisted. "She'll be the end of the Amazons, I guarantee it!" Shampoo cringed at the memory of her old nemesis.
FLASHBACK
Shampoo was a young girl of about thirteen, trotting happily along the dirt road through the countryside. She was carrying a large boar she had just slain on her back. It would make a fine feast that night.
Just then a figure jumped up from behind and grabbed the boar clear off her back. "What the-?" Shampoo looked up and saw another Amazon girl of about the same age.
The girl twirled head over heels in circles through the air and landed gracefully, holding the boar above her head with one arm. The girl had long silky black hair that was pulled back so loosely that it hung down over her shoulder. She also had a very haughty expression as she placed her other hand on her hip.
"Curler!" Shampoo shouted in contempt. "Give me back my boar!"
"Hmph. To let it be taken from you so easily." Curler said. "You need more training Shampoo. It's a wonder anyone with your genetics has managed to stay chief for so long."
Shampoo's eye twitched angrily. "You caught me off guard! But I can fight you now!" She got into a fighting stance.
"It's hardly worth my effort." Curler sneered. "And I wouldn't want to embarrass you."
Shampoo growled and jumped at her opponent, ready to punch her. But Curler jumped up, boar and all, and when she was over Shampoo she kicked her foot down on the back of Shampoo's head, sending her down to the ground.
Shampoo stood up quickly and wiped the dust out of her eyes. Curler was already running away along the dirt road, heading back towards the Amazon village.
"Thanks for the food!" Curler yelled back towards Shampoo with a laugh.
END FLASHBACK
Everyone looked at Shampoo skeptically as she finished her story.
Lotion broke the silence. "So…you're sure that's not just your own bias coming through?" She asked sarcastically.
"No! That just what happened!"
"I hardly think that gives us reason to doubt Curler's motives." Cologne added. "It was so long ago."
"She no want anything but her own gain!" Shampoo insisted.
"Argh! Curler this, Razor that! I sick of hearing about them, I'm going home!' Luffa stood up to leave, still particularly peevish.
"We not go anywhere until we decide what we do!" Shampoo scolded.
"There's nothing to be done Shampoo." Cologne sighed. "We can't go against the Council."
"You give up too easily!" Shampoo shouted at her Great Grandmother.
Akane was starting to shake with ever growing irritation. Suddenly her temper snapped. "Why don't you…" Akane punted Shampoo through the ceiling. "ARGUE IN YOUR OWN HOME!"
"Akane! Look what you did!" Ranma shouted in dismay. "You made a THIRD hole in the ceiling!" Akane glared at him.
Shampoo ran back into the dojo a second later, looking angry. "What you do that for Akane? And I here I was trying to be nice!"
"You call bursting into our house and causing all this ruckus nice?" Akane shouted.
Luffa and Lotion both sighed and shook their heads at their mother's behavior. "Well bye." Luffa continued in her previous attempt to leave.
"Yeah, bye." Lotion gave Daichi a slight wave as she followed after her sister. He returned it rather stiffly, still shaken.
"Come along Shampoo." Cologne used the pointed end of her staff to hook the back of Shampoo's shirt and proceeded to pull her along to the exit. Shampoo resisted little but still turned away her nose with a slight "Hmph."
When all the Amazons had left Kiyoshi approached Ranma. "We're going to finish the lesson now, right Sensei? I have some questions about punching!"
"Would you look at the time!" Daichi glanced at his watch-less arm. "I better get on that homework!" He hurried out of the dojo.
"I better go start dinner!" Akane quickly followed him.
"Hey!" Ranma yelled after them.
Kiyoshi sighed. "How rude it was of everyone to interrupt our very important class. Don't you agree Sensei? Such trivial matters really. I only hope Daichi and Jatsuma can each manage to marry someone tolerable so it isn't such a pain when they come to visit Makoto and me on holidays."
Ranma eyes twitched and he visibly shuddered at the thought. Then he gritted his teeth to keep himself from saying anything offensive to his only paying student. "Come on." He sighed. "I've got a new training technique."
Kiyoshi gasped excitedly. "Wow! What is it?"
"It's called fixing the roof." Ranma handed him a hammer.
"Yay!"
So much to review! So little time!
