Wow, I have a lot of apologies to make...
First of all I would like to apologize for not posting this chapter sooner! I know it has been an incredibly long time since I last updated, and now I'm almost scared to post this and get a million and one nasty reviews saying how horrible I am for abandoning you all with such an evil cliff-hanger... I never meant to do that! Time just got away from me, and I have no excuses.
Secondly, I'm sorry but there are no premonitions in this chapter. I typed this all out in the past two hours, and now it's midnight and I really need to go to sleep so I can be awake in school tomorrow. I wanted to post something TONIGHT so that you all know that I am still alive and still here, with the full intention of finishing this fic! And I promise I will try to get the next chapter out sooner.
Now, please enjoy this chapter and accept my apologies! I'm sorry! Lo siento!
I can't bring myself to meet Remus's eyes. I know it really shouldn't make a difference, but ever since that night when James and I had that dream, I just haven't been able to look at him. It's not everyday that you find out your boyfriend's best friend is a werewolf!
Don't get me wrong; I'm not prejudiced or anything. It's just… knowing that werewolves exist and actually knowing a werewolf are two completely different things. I didn't know this was going to affect me so much, but it really has.
I can't meet Sirius's eyes, either. Maybe it has to do with the fact that the dream prophesied that Sirius was going to murder me and James, and then proceed to attempt to kill our only son.
These are the reasons why I let James to all the talking when we confront Remus and Sirius before breakfast.
"Guys!" James calls out to his friends to stop them from leaving the Common Room. He squeezes my hand, more for me to give him strength than for him to give strength to me, when Sirius, Remus, and Peter turn around and start walking back.
"What's up, James?" Remus asks.
"Yeah," Sirius says, smiling mischievously. "How was your night on the couch with Señorita Evans?"
If I was feeling more like myself right now, I would probably give Sirius a nice black eye for that comment, which is followed up with shaking wrists as if Sirius is shaking maracas. But because of the lack of sleep that followed the dream, I'm too tired to do much but glare at Sirius's shoes with slits for eyes.
James ignores Sirius's comment completely, turning to Peter. "Peter, you can go on to breakfast if you want."
Peter looks worriedly at his other two friends, probably wondering if something is going on that he is being purposefully excluded for. Peter annoys the hell out of me sometimes; he's one of those people who would beg for you to punch them if it would make you his friend, and I hate people like that. I know James hates people like that too, which makes me wonder why he even considers Peter a friend.
After Peter finally makes his way out—looking over his shoulder to make sure it's what all of his friends really want—James takes his hand out of mine to ball them into fists. "Are you," he hisses through clenched teeth, "my best mates or not?"
Remus and Sirius both look shocked, and they both nod their heads emphatically while muttering assurances that they really are James's friends, and that James can always count on them for anything and everything.
"Why?" Sirius asks. "Why are you asking us this all of a sudden, after everything we've done together?"
James glares at his friend, breathing heavily. I haven't seen James this angry at Sirius since I had been pretending to date Black! "Because Lily and I had a dream last night."
"About what?" Remus asks curiously.
James takes a moment to answer, looking like he is choosing his words very, very carefully. Finally, he says in a strained voice, "About our deaths."
Remus still looks confused. "'Our' as in the Marauders, or as in you and Lily?"
James turns his head quickly to look at Remus, but then turns back to Sirius and says, "'Our' as in me and Lily being murdered by you." He faces Remus again. "As in you helping him murder Harry."
Sirius and Remus both gasp, and then stood in silence. Finally, Sirius speaks: "Do you really think we'd do that, James?" he demands. "Do you really think Remus and I, who have been your best mates since Year 1, would ever murder you? Would ever do anything to hurt you or any of your possible future children?"
"Why?" Remus asks. "Because some dream told you? We're your friends, James! Why would you think this?"
"I DON'T KNOW!" James bellows angrily, taking his hand out of mine to make frustrated gestures at the ceiling. "I DON'T KNOW! All I know is that last night we had a dream about Harry trying to kill Sirius—!"
"And you say I'm the traitorous one?" Sirius interrupts.
"BECAUSE SIRIUS HAD KILLED HIS PARENTS!" James continued, glaring at his friend. "HARRY WANTED REVENGE! AND THEN HERMIONE DISCOVERED THAT REMUS WAS IN ON THE WHOLE THING AND WANTED TO HELP SIRIUS KILL HARRY!"
"What?" Remus exclaims. "I would never do that! And who is Hermione?"
"Harry's friend," I mutter, the first thing I've said all day. "She's going to be the smartest girl in her year." I am finally able to look up and meet Remus's eyes. "She's smart enough to figure out your secret… why you always seem to disappear during the full moon."
Remus's face goes so pale that someone walking in might think I had just performed the Killing Curse on him. He opens his mouth to say something, but Sirius interrupts him.
"YOU TOLD HER?" Sirius bellows at James.
"IT WAS IN THE DREAM!" counters James defensively.
"STOP!" I scream. "I'm tired of hearing you argue! You're best friends, now stop this!"
All three boys are now looking at me as if I have grown three extra heads, although right now I could use three more brains to handle everything that has happened since third year. I just can't stand to just sit here while these three boys duke it out over this…
Unlike James, I don't think that we've been given these visions just so we could look at our son's life before it actually happens; I think we've been given the chance to see all of this for a reason. Maybe we're actually destined to change things, to make sure none of this actually happens. My take on fate, though, is not the usual opinion: I think that everyone has many different fates, and the decisions you make every day—even the little ones—determine your overall destiny. So who's to say that these visions tell a future that is set in stone? Maybe we can change things. Unfortunately that won't happen until these boys get it through their thick heads that there actually are precautions we can take.
James takes a deep breath to calm himself down, and takes my hand again. He gives it an extra squeeze, this time for my benefit, and admits, "You're right, Lily."
I can't believe I'm actually hearing James admit this. Am I really having that much of an affect on him?
"What do you suggest, then?"
I gulp, knowing that James won't like my answer. "We don't have to sit back and let this happen," I say, putting off my answer for as long as I can. When I see James's face, though, together with Sirius's and Remus's faces, I resign myself to the fact that they won't let me go anywhere until I tell them what it is that I have in mind. "We could try… the Unbreakable Vow."
The room is filled with noise before the words completely leave my lips.
"No way!" Sirius objects outright. "No freaking way!"
"We can't!" Remus yells passionately. "It's—!"
"It's Dark Magic!" James finishes.
I wait patiently for all of the boys to finish their tirades before pointing out, "There has got to be a reason why we're seeing these things, James. Do you want to change the future or not?"
"Yes!"
"Would you like to see your son come of age with your own, living, most likely middle-aged eyes?"
"Yes!"
"Would you like to be able to trust your friends for the rest of your life?"
"YES!"
"THEN WHY NOT?"
"BECAUSE IT'S DARK MAGIC, LILY!"
I look into James's hazel eyes, noticing that the brown is overshadowing the green, the way it usually does whenever James is scared. I know that he hates Dark Magic with a passion, but we have to do everything in our power—magical or otherwise—to not only ensure the future safety of us and out son, but to continue the friendships we have today.
Speaking of friendships, Amissa and Winola enter the Common Room, looking for me. When they find me with three of the Marauders, all four of us looking as if we might kill someone, they make their ways over to us, respecting the tense silence that has taken the room until they finally come up next to me.
"What's going on?" Amissa asks.
"Yeah, why are you all so…"
"Scared?" James asks sarcastically. "Maybe when the person you love wants you to perform Dark Magic, you'll understand."
When Amissa and Winola look at me as if I am completely out of my mind, I have to explain everything to them. When I'm finished, they look reproachfully at James and his friends.
"Why not try it?" Winola asks. "You do want to change the future, right?"
I clamp my hand over James's mouth before he can respond. "We've already been through this part, Winola."
"I can't see any other way of knowing for sure that this isn't going to happen…" Amissa says thoughtfully. "Unless you would all just like to trust each other and risk the consequences…"
"I say we risk the consequences!"
I look angrily at James. "Risk the consequences?" I repeat. "You're talking about your life right now. Your life, mine, and your son's. And You want to risk the consequences?" I glare at James, and then, without waiting for his response, I yell, "Well, I know another way we can make sure this whole thing never happens: we never get married! There won't be any Harry James Potter, there won't be any murder, and there won't be any betrayal!"
James looks as if someone just slapped him. I watch him take several deep breaths, not noticing that my own chest is rising and falling in perfect synchronization with his. Finally, he says weakly, "Let's do it, then."
It's then that I realize what I've done: I just pressured my boyfriend into doing something he hates, something he absolutely lives against. What sort of girlfriend am I? But when I open my mouth to apologize and take it all back, James interrupts me.
"Will one of you be our Bonder?" he asks Amissa and Winola lifelessly.
Amissa nods her head and steps forward. Amissa has been my friend longer than Winola has; it wasn't until second year that Winola became my friend after we shared the blame for a mishap in Potions, but Amissa was my friend right from day one. It doesn't surprise me one bit that she is the first to volunteer for this sort of thing… for me.
Amissa pulls her wand out of her robes and places its tip where Sirius, Remus, James and I have linked our hands from where we are now kneeling on the ground.
James, knowing more about this sort of spell than I do, begins: "Do you, Remus Lupin and Sirius Black, promise to only raise a wand or fist to me and my family when it is in a gesture of friendship?"
Remus nods, and Sirius speaks for them: "We do."
A thin tongue of brilliant flame slithers from Amissa's wand and winds its way around our hands.
"Will you keep my secrets, and those of my family, throughout your entire lives?"
"We will."
Another tongue of fire snakes out of the wand and winds around the other one, forming a glowing chain around our hands.
"Will you never—,"
"Knowingly," I add, knowing what James is about to say and realizing that accidents will always happen no matter what spell is used to prevent them.
"Will you never knowingly harm me or any member of my family for as long as you live?"
"We won't."
One more tongue of fire, and the chain is complete.
