Not everyone knows what we do or even who we are. Since our job is a high priority it's hard to get close, even if we want to, we can't. Every day we have our fair share of adventures, dangerous or not. Luckily the 15 years or more of training helps, but not with the emotion. Every time someone gets hurt or killed we know why. Sometimes it's for the greater good, or just because we didn't say something, or try to reason a little bit more. Cases like Max and Meg are hard to forget. Hard to shove to the back of one's mind where it lingers, waiting for an instant or image to return it to the surface away from the abyss; the darkness; the shadows. Innocence is forever lost and it never coming back. We will never be able to go to bed at night and not be bombarded by nightmares of past hunts. In years to come when we hopefully defeat this Demon who attacks mothers and destroys families, we can live a safer life.
Dean and I seem born into this. This fight of good vs. evil, light vs. darkness. But through darkness, light prevails. When this happens we'll be there. Dean, shot gun in hand, me, Rituale Romanum held in both. We will never let these creatures do to others as they've done to our family. No one should have to go through what we and so many others before and after us have been through. Losing someone so caring, so kind, at such a young age. After all she was our mother. No one can replace her. Though I was much too young to remember her, I seen Dean so often deal with the heart break of her death. Now he seems to be losing the memory of her slowly, consistently. Can he still hear her voice? Can he see her face? Only he can tell. And Jessica. Why did the Demon kill her? She wasn't meant to die at that age, no one is. Why couldn't he just leave her be. Even now, she burns.
Are we destined to live this life 'till the end? Are we destined to follow this road to God knows where? Or are we even allowed a chance at a happy ending? Peace? An apple pie life? Or even a safe one? One without demons, angry spirits, creatures of darkness, just birds singing their happy song, sunny days with blue skies. Is this too much to ask? Enough with the madness, the sadness, the mayhem. When will this day come?
Two days, a few months, years, decades? No one knows but Father Time. Haven't we proven ourselves enough to get into the "higher place"? Self sacrifice. Every demon we battle, every person we save, we prove this. What makes us have to live this life?
Throughout the months, years, we've faced Wendigo's, haunted paintings/trucks, things that only exist because people believe in them, and so much more that it would take an eternity to tell. Much joy has come to seeing these creatures fall, though more sadness has overwhelmed us.
We may be lost, but never forgotten. No one shall fall, only prevail. The Demon started this war and we shall finish it, once and for all. For everyone who had every felt the loss, now shall feel the gain. Now and forever.
