PART IV

That night at precisely 8 p.m. Lily said the password and moved past the statue of the gargoyle guarding the entrance. She was quite surprised to see that James was already there speaking with the professor. Their conversation halted as she entered the room.

"Good evening Ms. Evans," Dumbledore greeted her with twinkling eyes and a small smile.

"Hello Professor," She said with a smile, "Potter," she nodded at him as an after thought. She conjured up a chair for herself as there were only two in the room and they were being occupied. She didn't notice the surprised look on James' face when he saw her do that powerful of magic.

"Do you have any questions, suggestions, or ideas?" Dumbledore asked her politely.

She hesitated and her eyes darted towards James briefly. "Well, I was thinking about, well maybe we could, towards the end of the year, if it was ok with everyone I mean…"

"Spit it out!" James said impatiently.

"I was hoping that we could have a memorial service," Lily spoke hurriedly. "I mean people have lost so much to the war and I really think that we should take time to commemorate those who have been killed."

Dumbledore looked at her knowingly. "I think that would be a good idea. What do you think Mr. Potter?"

"We should do it," he said passionately. "I think we should honor those who have been severely injured too, though, not just the dead. There's really not that many of them."

Lily looked at him startled at how fierce he had become. "Oh well, I was just thinking those who have passed away…I mean everyone who was injured is still alive…"

James looked at her disbelievingly. "Are you saying that they don't deserve it because they survived a raid or a town massacre?"

She shifted uncomfortably. "Well I suppose…I guess I was just thinking of the murdered people instead of those who still get to live their lives."

"But the survivors don't get to live their lives! They've been changed! They've been tortured! Merlin! Evans I didn't know that you were so ignorant to the world around you. I thought that you were supposed to be smart!" James told her heatedly.

"Who are you to call me ignorant?" Lily rose from her chair. "I'm muggleborn! I'm a target!"

"You're too busy living off in your muggle world to really see how this war affects the injured!"

Tears sprang to Lily's eyes. "You don't know me, Potter," she said through gritted teeth. "So do not act like you know a single thing about my life!" She turned towards the headmaster. "I'm sorry sir. I have to go." She fled the room.

Lily ran back to the common room for the heads. She flung herself down on the couch unseeingly. She jerked up moments later as she realized her head was on someone's lap. "What are you doing here?" she asked Sirius and Remus embarrassedly.

"Waiting for Prongs," Sirius answered with a smirk. "Aww why'd you move? I was just getting comfortable!"

"You are a pig!" she said with narrowed eyes. She guessed that Prongs was James, what a weird nickname.

Sirius was about to reply but Remus interrupted him. "What's wrong Lily? I thought that you and James had a meeting with Dumbledore."

"We did!" she sniffled. "Potter was being a complete prat about an idea I had."

"What happened?" Remus asked.

She explained the entire thing to him, leaving out the fact that the reason it hurt so much was because she was a victim, of course. "…And then I told the headmaster goodbye and here I am," she finished. Sirius and Remus exchanged looks and Lily recognized them as should-we-tell-her-a-secret type glances. "What? Am I missing something?" she questioned.

"Evans," Sirius began politely, which was a first. "You really offended James. You basically implied that people who survived don't deserve any sympathy or recognition."

Remus took over. "Like for instance, I don't know if you heard about that attack over the summer, where that witch and her family were attacked, Her parents were murdered and she was tortured. Don't you feel sorry for her?" he asked.

Lily tensed. That was her he was talking about! No, she didn't feel sorry for herself. It didn't go her any good to wallow in self-pity. She just looked down and hoped that they took that as some form of answer.

"James' parents were attacked a couple of years ago," Sirius explained. "He was here at the time so he only got the news through a letter. His father was killed and his mother managed to get away. There was only one man attacking them so she had a chance to floo to safety. It kills him to see her so upset."

"I didn't know," Lily finally said softly. "I wouldn't have been so blunt if I had."

"It's ok," Remus said patting her knee and taking no notice as she flinched slightly. "You couldn't have known."

Suddenly someone came stomping up to them. The portrait had swung open without them taking notice and a certain someone had heard the tale end of the conversation. "Gee Evans, do you feel sorry for me now?" James asked harshly.

She stood up and looked him square in the eye. "No."

He faltered. "No? What do you mean no? I guess I shouldn't be surprised. It's not like you actually have a heart."

"Yes, I'm sorry that your dad died and that your mum is heartbroken, but that doesn't give you the right to walk around acting like a self-righteous git!" Lily rubbed at her eyes that were prickling furiously and walked to her room. She could hear James berating his friends in the background about spilling his secrets.

"I hate this," she whispered. "I hate this war. It's ripping families and friends apart. I hate how I don't have anyone, and I hate how no one knows." She had no idea that a certain werewolf had gone to check on her and had heard everything thanks to his superb hearing. He backed away quietly.


The next few days passed quietly and finally it was time for defense against the dark arts class. The teacher this year was Gideon Prewett who had graduated as a Gryffindor several years ago. Lily had heard enough snatches of conversation to know that he was really good and knew his stuff well.

"Hello class," he said in a friendly tone. "I'm Professor Prewett and I'm teaching defense against the dark arts for the year."

"You're not staying longer?" Sirius asked.

"Nope. I'm planning on only being here a year. I don't want the curse to get me, after all!" The class laughed slightly. For the past 20 years or so no DADA teacher had lasted longer than a year. A couple had ended their careers in quite messy deaths.

"Now onto class! This year I'm really going to be focusing on the war. You all need to be prepared. Its going full force and you need to be able to protect yourselves. I'd like to see what you've got. I need 2 volunteers." No one raised his or her hand. "Anyone?" he asked. "Alright! I'll have to pick from my attendance record." He thumbed through the paper. "Rodolphus Lestrange and…" he looked through the list once again. "Lily Evans. Come on up! I've cleared a space. Ok no extremely dark magic can be used. The first to disarm the other wins."

The Slytherin stepped up and moved beside Lily. She shook slightly but tried to ignore it. This bastard had killed her parents. "I'm rather good at disarming," he said loudly for the entire class to hear.

Lily glared. "Only if it's 5 against one!" she replied heatedly. The class watched them in alarm as they saw how serious they were about winning.

The duel began when he threw a disarming curse at her. She blocked it quickly. "Wingardium leviosa!" she shouted at him. He rose quickly and looked around confused. She ended the spell and he landed with a huge thud. Lestrange sprang back up quickly and through a stupefy at her. It grazed against her. Lily wasn't close to being finished though. She cast hex after hex on him. There were several instances where she could have just taken his wand but she needed to do this. Finally she disarmed him. "I guess you can't handle a fair fight," she spat as she flung his wand back at him.

"Class dismissed!" Prewett called out. "Ms. Evans stay behind please!" Once everyone was gone he turned to her. "What was that?" he demanded. "I just wanted a simple demonstration of disarming an opponent. You toyed with him and purposely tried to cause him pain! I hope you have a very good reason or I'll be forced to give you detention. You could lose your badge for this!"

"He's a deatheater Professor! I know it!" she told him.

"I highly doubt that you-know-who wouldn't take someone still in school! Do you have any proof?" he asked.

"Please believe me!" she pleaded. "He was there- there that night. I recognized his voice!"

The professor's expression softened. He had been made aware of the attack on her family. Most of her teachers had. "I'll talk to the headmaster about it," he promised. "You're dismissed."

Lily walked out of the classroom and was startled to find the marauders waiting there. "How much did you hear?" she asked wearily.

"A bit," Remus admitted.

"But not everything," Peter added.

"That was bloody brilliant by the way, the duel I mean," Sirius chimed in.

"Thanks," she muttered.

"I'm sorry Evans," James said uncomfortably. "I got too angry with you a few days ago. We need to be able to work together and not fight. Truce?" he asked.

She bit her lip and then smiled. "Sure. It's Lily by the way, James," she said before walking away.

"Bye Lily!" James yelled out.

"Bye James!" she called back without turning around. If she had then he would have seen a huge grin on her face and she would have noticed a matching one on his.


The next few weeks passed Lily by in a blur. There was an immense amount of schoolwork. Lily, who was widely known as the top student, was even having some trouble keeping up. She had grown closer to the marauders since they were almost always in the head common room with her. James kept his word and tried his hardest to be polite. Lily found that he could actually be a decent person at times. He still flirted with tons of girls, but Lily was grateful that he had stopped teasing her. He tried to hide it, but she knew he was still pulling pranks left and right. Hopefully now that he was in charge, he at least felt a tiny amount of guilt.

The first quidditch match of the season had been Hufflepuff against Slytherin. Lily hadn't bothered to go. She really wasn't into sports or huge crowds. James had of course come back from the match furious that 'those slimy snakes' had obliterated the Hufflepuffs. "They cheated of course!" James insisted, and Lily was inclined to believe him.

Now it was time for the Gryffindor vs. Ravenclaw game. Lily was once again not planning on going. She hadn't seen a full quidditch match since 1st year. Of course now that the marauders were better friends with her, they had to do something about it.

"Hey Lily!" Remus greeted her as he sidled up next to her walking down the hall. "What's new?"

Lily glanced at him and kept going. "Nothing, I'm just about to head down to the library. How about you?"

"Well…I'm going to a certain quidditch match and I'm about to force a certain someone to come along with me!"

"No Remus!" she rolled her eyes. "Quidditch is boring."

He mocked gasped. "Blasphemy! Come one! Don't you want to go see Sirius and James play?" he asked.

"Um no?" Lily replied.

"That's it! Drastic times call for drastic measures!" Remus grabbed her arm and forcefully pulled her towards the pitch.

"Ack! Remus stop! Slow down!" Lily yelled. He was pushing through the crowd and she kept slamming into things. Finally he had taken her up to the Gryffindor box. Peter had saved seats for them in the front.

"Took you guys long enough!" Peter grumbled as he moved over for them.

Lily sat down and looked around her. The quidditch pitch was huge but didn't look nearly as daunting as it did back in 1st year. She could vaguely make out a bunch of familiar looking faces in the other boxes. The game was surprisingly entertaining. She enjoyed watching Sirius and James play. Okay- so it was mostly James, but whatever. He was the only guy who had ever really flirted with her, even though he was kidding, and for some reason she just couldn't help but take notice of him. Finally the game was over. Gryffindor had won 230-110. Lily stood up and cheered loudly.

Remus glanced sideways at her in amusement. "You know for someone who hates quidditch, you sure can cheer," he commented.

She blushed slightly. "Well, it wasn't as boring as I thought."

"Or maybe you just liked watching a certain player?" Remus said knowingly.

"No!" she denied quickly. "Come on! Let's go down and meet them!" she changed the subject pulling the two Gryffindor boys from their seats. It was slow moving through the crowd but eventually they reached the locker rooms. The quidditch teams had both just come out. James and Sirius smiled as they saw Lily and their two friends heading towards them, though they had yet to spot them. Suddenly, a guy came and grabbed her hand, pulling her away from Remus and Peter's arms. Sirius rolled his eyes and James scowled.

"What are you doing?" Lily hissed frantically at the boy once they had reached somewhere quieter. It was Davy Gudgeon from her ancient runes class.

"This," he said. He pressed his lips firmly against hers. Lily was thoroughly startled. Her eyes were wide open. It was an awkward sort of feeling, her first kiss. She forced herself to relax into it a little and closed her eyes. Eventually it ended.

"Erm thanks?" Lily said blankly, hardly believing what had just happened.

He smiled sheepishly. "Sorry, it's just that I've been noticing you lately, you know around with James and his friends. I just really got the urge to kiss you."

"Oh, ok," She replied still bewildered.

"It was exactly what I expected," he informed her.

"And what did you expect?" she asked with a raised eyebrow as she gained control of herself.

"You know- lips touching lips, maybe a bit of tongue," Davy answered.

"Well I'm glad I lived up to your expectations," Lily informed him with a giggle. She could hardly believe it! Someone was interested in her! Lily, the girl with the body of a 13 year old!

"Well, I've got to get going," he said shuffling his feet. "My house is going to be calling me a traitor for kissing the house we just lost to!"

"You played well," Lily assured him.

"Thanks," he smiled. "See you in class!" With another brief kiss on the lips he jogged away to catch up with the mob of students.

Lily practically skipped back up to the head common room. A goofy grin was plastered on her face. As she prepared to enter, she tried gaining control over her facial expression. Saying the password, she immediately flopped herself down on the couch in the empty room.

'I just got kissed…I just got kissed…I just got kissed!' The words reverberated through Lily's mind. 'It's about time,' she mused, 'I was dreading graduating and never having been thoroughly snogged. He probably was a good pick for a first time. I'm not head over heels for him so I wasn't completely nervous. He took me by surprise so I didn't have time to start shaking…why did he do it though? Does he actually like me? He said he noticed me hanging out with James and his friends. I guess he thought I had status.' Lily snorted. 'Yah right! Heh, I may be Head Girl, but people aren't exactly falling over themselves to befriend me.' Suddenly a new worry spread to Lily's mind. 'Did I do it right? He seemed to like it, I suppose…Gah! What's he going to do next time I see him? He doesn't think we're dating does he? I've never had a boyfriend before. I don' think I could handle a relationship!' Lily started feeling sick to her stomach the more she thought about it.

She forced herself to calm her racing thoughts and to take her mind off of it she began reading a book. Every few moments or so though Lily would stop, and a smile would spread across her face. She had been kissed! It probably wasn't a big deal to him, but it meant everything to her. She was pretty relieved that she had gotten it over with. 'Stop!' she told herself. 'You're acting like a giggly schoolgirl…wait I am a giggly schoolgirl. Oh well that's ok then.'

She dropped her book and turned on the radio. She began dancing around the room. She was self-conscious about doing it in front of other people, but no one was here, and she was in entirely too good of a mood.

Suddenly the music turned off and Lily spun around. The marauders were standing there smirking. Sirius and James began clapping.

"Encore!" Sirius shouted out.

"Oh, Brava!" Remus put in.

"Excellent dancing skills!" Peter exclaimed.

Lily was mortified. "How long have you guys been standing there?" she asked weakly. Her face resembled a tomato.

"A solid two minutes," Remus answered chuckling.

"You know Lillers, those were some serious dance moves. You should bust them out more often!" Sirius teased.

"You looked happy," James observed. "Did something happen?"

Lily blushed. She couldn't tell them that! They'd make fun of her for sure. "Oh I was just excited that Gryffindor won," she responded way too nonchalantly.

"And where exactly did you run off to after the game?" Sirius asked waggling his eyebrows.

"No where," Lily replied calmly. "I just came back here. No one was around."

"Funny," Peter said dumbly, "I could've sworn I saw you go off with Davy Gudgeon."

Sirius swooned with a hand over his heart, "No Evans say it isn't so! You were consorting with the enemy!"

Lily smirked at his dramatics. "He didn't seem like such an enemy to me," she answered slyly.

"Lillian Evans!" Remus gasped. "And what exactly were you doing with said Ravenclaw?"

"Nothing that would interest you," Lily said rolling her eyes.

"Yah you're probably right!" Sirius said plopping down on the couch. Peter and James followed his actions.

Remus came up to her and spoke quietly. "I'm glad to see you so happy. You know, I was worried about you for a while."

Lily smiled and kissed him on the cheek impulsively. "Thanks you're sweet. But I'm fine, really!" she insisted. She took her leave from the room and exited through the portrait hole. If she had looked back she would have seen Peter and Sirius making suggestive faces and kissing noises towards Remus who was rolling his eyes at his friend's immaturity. James wore a small frown on his face, but quickly wiped it away before Moony could notice.