Iris' Past
*Warning this chapter contains mentions of child abuse
Now you are probably thinking I was a real bitch for doing that and yeah I did sound a bit harsh but I guarantee she will thank me one day for saving her from that prick. I just knew she had no idea and I couldn't sit by and watch that poor girl get used. All men are exactly the same, that's why I stopped dating and stopped believing that men would change, I don't trust any man and I'm never going to. Now your probably wondering where all this guy bashing and hatred comes from? Well, that's going to take awhile, so I guess I have to start from the beginning.
It started with believe it or not my own father. He had been an alcoholic for as long as I can remember, he was mean and vicious. There was never a time I knew or saw him sober. When he wasn't hitting me on a daily basis he would go after my mom. He would come in my room in the middle of the night while I was sleeping and...let's just say he wouldn't leave until the morning...it became almost on a nightly basis. My mom never knew about that...I just couldn't bring myself to tell her, I was so ashamed and I didn't want to burden her more then she already was. At least I was able to get away for a little bit by going to school which I never wanted to leave but my mom had to deal with him all day...but also in a strange way I felt like it was my fault, he made me believe it was my fault. I never told anyone because I was so terrified of him, he had brainwashed me into thinking no one would believe me and I also knew if they took me away my mom would be all alone, she took so much abuse for me that I couldn't leave her behind. When I was fourteen before I went to school one day my mom told me we were leaving and how she couldn't take it anymore, she came up with a plan to pack while I was at school and pick me up which she did every day so it wouldn't look suspicious and we'd ride off into the sunset and never look back. When she didn't showed up I knew something was wrong, when I came home I found my mom and father dead on the floor with a gun in my father's hand, there was blood everywhere. I saw that my mom's suitcase was open with clothes in it, I just sodded and held her body. We were finally going to get away and he took it from us! After my parents died I was in the foster system until I left when I was 18, I guess no one wanted to adopt someone so damaged. Unfortunately my story doesn't stop there, not even close.
When I was 18 I met my first boyfriend Greg, I trusted him enough to tell him about my past. After 3 months of dating he said that he loved me and promised he would never hurt me. We slept together that night and that was my very first time. It was so special to me and I really thought I had found the perfect guy and was so lucky...but I was wrong. Two weeks later I came home from work and found him in bed with some stripper that he met at a club. He didn't even care, he just blamed it on me, said I wasn't fulfilling him enough and that he had just told me what I wanted to hear to get into my pants and take my virginity...he used me. I couldn't believe it, I was heartbroken! I told myself I would be more careful the next time but I was young and stupid.
My next two boyfriends also cheated on me, the third one was worse because he cheated with one of my friends and I don't make friends easy so that was a really hard blow. My fourth boyfriend didn't cheat on me, oh no he decided to be a controlling asshole that would tell me what to do, who I could hang out with, dress and think, he was very abusive mentally. I broke up with him the first and only time he smacked me in the face after I finally stood up to him.
My fifth boyfriend again came off so sweet and nice, that turned out to be a complete joke. I found out while looking for something in his closet that he had been following me. There were dozens of pictures of me, it wasn't sweet or cute, oh no! He took pictures of me at work, in the shower, at the store and several of them I could tell were taken directly inside my closet. After I revealed all the pictures to him he admitted following me because he was convinced that I was cheating on him, he wasn't making any sense, I never gave him a reason to doubt me. I immediately broke up with him mostly because I could heavily feel his obsession, it was so creepy! After the break-up he stalked me for months, calling me over and over again, coming to my apartment in the middle of the night, leaving me threatening letters and voicemails and much more. In fact I had reached out to several of his past girlfriends and they all told me that they too were stalked and harassed by him, he was so scary and unpredictable! I tried getting a restraining order but the fucking judge wouldn't believe me that he was dangerous and that was after all the proof I showed him and that pissed me off! I was done with all his shit and I knew he was never going to stop so I packed the few things I had, left in the middle of the night and moved to New York, I changed my last name to my mom's maiden name Watson and luckily I haven't heard from him since.
Here in a new place I thought my luck would finally change but you guessed it my next three boyfriends also cheated on me! Of course two of them ended up already being married. And then comes my last boyfriend Ricky, again I actually began to believe that he was going to be the one man to change everything and give me some sort of...hope. I took it really slow with him and he was so patient and understanding, he told me he loved me and he was the one that I could finally trust. It was the same speech I've heard from all of them but I was being so stupid, I should have known better but again I thought I was so lucky and had found the perfect guy. But it all came crashing down when I answered his phone for him which he asked me to when he was in the shower, I found out he had a parole officer and the officer told me he had a record of having several charges of assault with past girlfriends and other men and had been jailed several times, his last offense was almost killing a man during a bar fight. I confronted him about it and that's when his true self came out and all I saw in his eyes was rage! That night he beat me up so bad I got a concussion, two broken ribs, knocked a tooth out and a broken wrist. I pressed charges and he is back in prison. After that disaster I vowed never to trust a man again and I haven't.
So here I am 3 and half years later not going on one single date and I haven't even been tempted. No man is going to fool me ever again, I rather be alone! I'm working at this bar where I have to deal with more dicks and assholes. I didn't really want to work at a place like this but without a college degree its hard to find good jobs. I slug down another shot.
"Iris, why would you do that?" Amber asked a little upset with me.
"You know exactly why, I just proved it right there...it's better she knows now then later."
"You have to realize one day that there are good men out there." Renee strongly declared.
"Yeah, where? I haven't found one." I shrug as I look around.
"Well...how about the Avengers, they are good guys. They saved New York and Sokovia." She quickly thought of after she couldn't think of a single man to mention.
"Oh please that's all an act. They are a bunch of frauds and I bet you it was their fault to begin with. I don't buy it especially Captain America." I snarled as I roll my eyes.
"Of course, only you would say something bad about the American golden boy." Amber sighed with a little grin.
"I'm telling you its all an act, no one is that good. I bet he is a narcissistic, controlling, self centered, self-righteous prick."
"Whatever you say...man if we weren't best friends I would think your a total bitch." Amber replied while Renee giggled.
"I know I am." I agreed with a smirk as I continued attending the patrons.
After the girls drove me home I walk inside, close my eyes, take a deep breath and look around my empty, cold apartment, I smile when Luna greets me and I feed her. Immediately after I take a long hot bubble bath. As I'm laying back against the bathtub I keep having flashes of my father coming in my room...running his hand down my back, squeezing my arm so tight I would be bruised the next day, covering my mouth so I couldn't make a sound, whispering in my ear threatening me and Mom. I curl into myself and sob for at least an hour.
After my bath I walk to the window to close and lock it, I see outside a couple on a bench cuddling, a few tears go down my cheek and as I watch them I wish that I was wrong about men and that I could finally meet the one man that would be different but I know better, I know that it will never change...they don't exist. Another sleepless lonely night by myself...at least I have Luna to cuddle with.
Now we know about her past and why she hates and doesn't trust men, I know I wouldn't.
