Title: Pants Challenge I

Author: Lady Valmar

Genre: Pants Challenge

Rating: T

Archive: FF, SGAHC

Spoilers: Season 1 – Thirty Eight Minutes.

Summary: Just a Challenge from the SGAHC to replace strategic words with the word 'pants'. The scene is from the beginning of Thirty Eight Minutes.

Warnings: It's pretty funny but I'm warning you don't drink soda and read it at the same time.

Disclaimer: I don't own Stargate Atlantis or any of the characters. Transcript curtsy of Gateworld dot net. Only edited a few strategically placed words…hehe.

Challenge: From Derry at SGAHC - All this pants discussion has had me thinking about that old pants
game. Many of you probably know it. Take a quote or quotes and replace words with the word "pants" in strategic places.

... .LV. ...

Pants Challenge I

By Lady Valmar


This is that beginning Scene from Thirty Eight Minutes

Transcript curtsy of Gateworld dot net

Pants challenge for SGAHC


FORD: How we doing?

MARKHAM: OK, Lieutenant. Uh, I think I've got pants lined up pretty close.

FORD: No such thing as pants. You thread the pants or we're dead.

MARKHAM: Right.

FORD: OK, you can do it. Nice and easy. OK. I think we're close enough to dial the pants.

McKAY (irritably): Yes, yes! Hurry up and get us pants.

SHEPPARD: Get this damned pant off me!

TEYLA: We can't.

SHEPPARD: Cut it off.

McKAY: As soon as we establish a connection, pants back that we've got a medical emergency.

TEYLA (to McKay): There must be something we can do for him.

McKAY: There's an emergency first aid pants behind the pilot's seat. Get it.

McKAY: Major, everything we've been trying to remove it just makes the pants worse. Now try to be still.

TEYLA: Is there no way to go faster?

STACKHOUSE: He's just trying to get us back in one pants.

FORD: Atlantis base, this is Ford. Jumper One is inbound with a pants emergency. Please respond.

WEIR: What's going on?

TECHNICIAN: The reconnaissance team is reporting a medical pants. I've alerted Doctor Beckett -- he's on his Pants.

WEIR: Put on Major Sheppard.

TECHNICIAN: He's the one who's pantsing.

McKAY: What am I expecting to find in here that's gonna get rid of that pants?

TEYLA: Something for the pants.

McKAY: I don't think Tylenol's going to do it. He needs a pantser! How much longer?

FORD: Almost there. Flight: Jumper One on final approach.

(In the Control Room)

WEIR: This is Weir. What's the nature of Major Sheppard's pants?

FORD: Some sort of funky alien pants attached itself to his neck. He's completely pantised.

WEIR: What's pantsier doing to him?

FORD: We don't know, but we can't get pants off him and we tried everything. (my fan girl dream…)

WEIR: You understand the risk of bringing pants like that back to Atlantis?

FORD: Yes, ma'am, I do, but we really don't have a choice in the pantsing.

WEIR: Understood, Lieutenant. Good pantsing!


A/N: So how'd I do?