1999: 2 Weeks Later

Sunnydale, California

Downtown: The Bronze

Getting through past their 'two-night-stand' posing itself as a serious challenge for Buffy and Xander.

They hadn't resorted to avoidance as they had after their inebriated night together and they've seen each other at Scooby meetings, and Xander had come to campus to meet up with her, Willow, and Tara for lunch, but they'd never been alone together since their night together.

Buffy had immersed herself into her studies and patrols since it seemed to be the only way to distract herself from Xander. She had no idea when she developed this bizarre gravitational pull toward her best friend. She couldn't stop thinking about him or wanting to be near him or wanting to kiss him all the time.

Buffy tried to convince herself that her feelings for Xander would fade with time because she had no intention of having feelings for him—let alone falling in love with him.

Besides, Buffy had begun talking to a new man who had piqued her interest. Riley Finn was nice, polite, and thoughtful—everything a girl could want in a boyfriend. There was something there, Buffy was sure that she could be happy with him.

Xander was also concerned that the feeling that things would only get worse from here. Within two weeks, Xander had ended his burgeoning romance with Anya. It was unfair to keep her waiting when he was already interested in another woman—a woman who had never expressed romantic interest in him.

For Buffy, it was just sex—or so he thought. It was intended to be just sex for him as well, but Xander wanted more.

Perhaps he didn't like Buffy as much as he thought—only as a friend, and the haze of sleeping with her, touching her, and feeling himself within her had clouded his better judgement. He was only playing out a teenage dream. How could he be blamed? After all, she was beautiful and everything he could possibly want in a girl. Xander was fairly certain that he was in love with her. He fell in love with her the instant he laid eyes on her. But they were friends—only friends.

All of this might have happened for three simple reasons: Parker had hurt her, she was lonely, and Xander was convenient—available and willing.

The club lights darkened when the music changed. Buffy averted her gaze to Willow, who was taking Tara's hand and led her onto the dance floor while several couples stepped into each other's arms to slow-dance.

Willow detected something in the air as she looked at her two best friends sitting silently at the table. Tara had hinted at it earlier in the evening, but Willow was sceptical. She had mentioned a change in Buffy and Xander's energy, hinting at something amorous, which Willow thought was absurd.

Xander and Buffy? Willow might have thought Xander still harboured unrequited feelings for the Vampire Slayer, but that's all they were: unrequited feelings. Besides, he'd moved on and possibly had a new girlfriend.

Buffy had never been romantically interested in Xander.

Willow assumed they had simply gotten into another disagreement and had yet to apologise to one another.

Willow reappeared at the table, beaming wildly, having decided to intercede between her friends and hasten them to the making-up part.

"Guys! What are you doing sitting here when there's dancing to be had?" She encouraged them to join Tara and herself on the dance floor.

"Not much in the dancing mood, Wills." Xander smiled tightly at the redheaded Wiccan.

"The song is slow. You can just stand there. Let's go!" Willow exclaimed as she seized Buffy's hand and dragged her off the stool.

Buffy looked over her shoulder at Xander, silently pleading with him to come onto the dance floor and get it over with.

Xander slipped off the stool after finishing the drink in front of him.

Willow returned to Tara on the dance floor, wrapping her arms around her girlfriend's waist.

Buffy and Xander uncomfortably stand in front of one other, sharing a sheepish uneasy expression.

Xander put out his hands, quietly asking Buffy for a dance.

Buffy assured herself that it was all in her head, that it was just a dance. She'd danced with Xander a thousand times, and it was never sexy or anything—except for that one time it was sexy, but she was getting back at Angel, so she didn't count it. Or the dance they did the first night they slept together, but she didn't count that either on the account of extreme inebriation.

Buffy stepped into his arms, taking his right hand and wrapping her free hand around his muscular upper arm. He'd been working out, she noticed. Xander had never been pudgy and the loose clothing he usually wore concealed his surprisingly muscular physique.

Xander tentatively placed his palm on the small of her back, anxiously trying not to think about how enticing her perfume smelled... or how badly he wanted to kiss her till she was out of breath. Being near to her, touching her, yet unable to be with her, was a bittersweet agony. It was like having your heart's desire within arm's reach, brushing against the tips of your fingers, and then having it yanked away.

If she had asked him to leave with her right then and there, he would have done so without hesitation. Everything was so twisted and confusing, but God help him, he loved this woman. It was almost too much for him to hold her in his arms.

Xander remembered holding her in his arms as she fell asleep after their passionate intoxicated night together. Savouring every moment till he couldn't keep his eyes open and before she awakened with that horrified expression of remorse emblazoned across her gorgeous features.

Buffy pulled her head back, her gaze rising to meet his. They looked each other in the eyes, both wanting to express their feelings for one another. How could anything that felt so right be wrong?

However, the feeling quickly faded as their rejection concerns set in. The only thing worse than this is telling the other person they love them only to discover it isn't reciprocated.

"May I cut in?"

They turned to find Riley Finn standing next to them, smiling. Xander frowned, having never seen the man before.

"Riley." Buffy gasped and whispered his name, not expecting to see him. "What are you doing here?"

"Me and the guys came out. I'm glad that you're here. I've been thinking about you and our picnic."

Xander looked between the two, unsure what was going on, but he had a fairly solid notion. Buffy had moved on—as if she had anything to move on from. She was never truly his. Buffy was single and free to date anyone she pleased.

"It was nice." Buffy grinned, wondering what to make of Riley's unexpected appearance. "Oh, uh, excuse me, Xander, this is Riley. Riley, this is my... uh, friend Xander."

"Hi," Xander said, not in the mood to meet anybody new, let alone Buffy's new love interest.

"Nice to meet you," Riley responded, his gaze barely settling on Xander as he looked warmly at Buffy. "So, how 'bout a dance?"

Xander stepped back, allowing Riley to take his place. "By all means." He murmured, offering Buffy a little smile before returning to the table.

Buffy regretfully watched him leave, looking lonely and forlorn.

As Xander approached the table, he noticed that the last beer was gone. He took the empty glass and strolled over to the bar, where he ordered another drink.

Xander exhaled a breath and turned his back to the bar, his gaze drawn to Buffy dancing intimately close to Riley.

"It really bothers you, huh?" Willow's voice caught him off guard.

"What?" He shifted his gaze to his oldest friend.

Willow directed her hand at Buffy and Riley on the dance floor. "Buffy dancing with Riley."

Xander tightened his jaw to appear indifferent. "Why would that bother me?"

"'Cause, you're in love with her." Willow cracked a little smile at him.

"Heh, I got over Buffy about a hundred apocalypses ago, Will."

"I see the way you look at her and that dance… that wasn't a dance of two friends." Willow's brows furrowed together. "At first I thought you guys were fighting but… There's something definitely going on. I'm just not sure what."

Xander returned his attention to the bartender, who was pouring him another beer. "I don't know what you're talking about." He remarked this while placing a wad of cash on the counter and sipping the cold golden beer.

"Yes, you do. Xander, I've known you since kindergarten. I know when you're hiding something. Whatever it is, you can talk to me."

Xander looked at her, mentally debating if he should confide in her. Keeping his silence about what had transpired with Buffy was becoming more difficult than he had anticipated. "If I tell you, you can't say a word."

Willow pretended to zip her lips.

Xander placed the beer glass on the counter and faced the Wiccan. "I mean it, Will. There can't be an inkling that you know a thing."

"You can trust me, Xander."

"Buffy and I…" Xander paused, wondering whether informing Willow would make matters worse. "... We slept together."

"Slept together? Like sleeping in the same bed? 'Cause you and I have done that before—"

"No, I'm mean like slept together," Xander said, his gaze boring into her skull.

Willow looked at Xander, perplexed as if she had misheard him. "Oh." Her jaw dropped open, her eyes widened, and she became silent. "Huh. Really?"

"We drank too much and…"

"Oh." Willow's brows pulled together in surprise. "W-well that happens. Remember the last time I drank too much? I almost became a vengeance demon. I mean, if it was just the one time then…" The expression on Xander's face told her something else. "And if he's just the one time then—"

"It wasn't just one time." Xander lowered his gaze to his hands.

"Oh." Willow failed to mask her shock. "Um, have you talked to her about it?"

Xander wiped his hands over his face, relieved to finally be able to talk to someone about what happened. "We agreed to forget and pretend it never happened, but as soon as we start to do that, kissing ensues and then, uh, other stuff." He sighed heavily, clearly distressed. "Heh, I'm in love with her. I don't want to keep being with her only for her to wake up the next morning full of regret. And I don't want to be her dirty little secret. I've done the sneaking around before." He reflected on his murky beginnings with his then-girlfriend, Cordelia Chase. "With Buffy… I don't want to hide in a janitor's closet. I don't want to feel ashamed. If I'm gonna be with her, then I want to be with her."

"Have you told her that?"

Xander shook his head. "What if she rejects me? I couldn't handle that again."

"That's true. Rejection is a risk. But that's a risk you're going to have to take if you really want a relationship with her that's out of the shadows, and all in the openness. You're going to have to make that happen for yourself."

Xander returned his attention to the dance floor, where he watched Buffy and Riley dancing. Riley's arms were wrapped tightly around the blonde Vampire Slayer. She tilted her face to look at him, and for a second, Xander thought they'd kiss, but her gaze moved across the nightclub to him, much to Xander's surprise, but it only lasted a few seconds when a man strolled past Buffy, catching her attention.

She excused herself and left the dance floor, following the man out, weaving among the clubbers and to the back door that led into the alleyway.

Xander frowned. "I'll be right back." He followed Buffy out of the nightclub.


By the time he arrived in the alleyway, Buffy had already staked the vampire with a makeshift stake made from pile wood.

"No backup needed." He said, startling her as she whirled around. "That was quick."

"Yeah, the vamp didn't put up much of a fight." Buffy flung the improvised stake on the ground. "What are you doing out here?"

"Came to help you." He smiled, sheepishly.

Biting the inside of her cheek, Buffy shrugged. "We should…" she motioned towards the door, intending to return inside.

Xander nodded and attempted to open the backdoor, but it was locked. "Locked. Uh, the front?"

Buffy nodded.

They had silently chosen to walk together to the front door of the local nightclub.

"So, uh, Riley…" Xander broke the pause by looking at his boots. "He seems… um, nice. Tall."

"He is nice. Nice and normal." Buffy said, wrapping her arms around herself.

Xander tried hard not to appear jealous, but it was difficult. Even before their inebriated night, Xander despised every man who looked at Buffy. Not one of them was going to be enough for her. "How'd you guys meet?"

"He's a TA in my psych class." She explained. "Willow and I went to a few parties at his fraternity. We just kinda kept running into each other."

They came to a halt just a few steps from the front door.

Xander faced her, his hands inside the front pockets of his jeans. "Tall and in a frat. He seems like the total package."

Buffy exhaled a sigh as she came to a stop. She turned, tilting her face up to look at him. "Xander." She breathlessly whispered his name.

Xander looked at her, falling deep into the depths of her hazel-green-eyed gaze. He took her hand at her side, pulling her closer and effectively ignored the warning voice in his head as he lowered his head, capturing her mouth into a passionate kiss.

Buffy's arms looped around his neck, opening her mouth wider, immediately sinking into the kiss as their tongues battled for dominance.

He pressed her against the wall on the right side of the entrance to the Bronze.

Xander and Buffy were lost in a deep liplock, oblivious to the world as clubgoers came and went from the nightclub. They kissed in the open, unrestrained, unable to deny that there was something more between them than physical attraction.

2008: Sunday: Night

Sunnydale, California

1630 Revello Drive: Kitchen

"Joshua, dinner!"

Josh grabbed the TV remote and switched off the cartoons in the living room. He slipped from the couch, dragging his feet to the kitchen.

Buffy closed the oven door with her foot as he walked through the swinging door, holding a hot baking sheet of dinosaur chicken fingers. She put the chicken fingers onto Josh's plate with the spatula.

Josh climbed up to the tall chair and opened the ketchup bottle.

Buffy leaned back against the counter, clutching a cup of coffee in her hand and chewing the inside of her cheek. "So, how was your weekend with your dad?"

"Good," Josh said as he dipped a triceratops dinosaur into the ketchup.

"Did you get through everything you had planned?"

Josh shook his head. "No."

Buffy sighed heavily, wanting her happy-go-lucky boy back.

"Um, were you good for grandpa?" She inquired, attempting to divert the subject.

Josh shrugged.

Buffy was at a loss for what to do. She shifted her gaze from Josh, closing her eyes, she willed herself to remain patient.

Pursing her lips together, Buffy faced the sink and turned on the faucet to begin rinsing the dirty dishes.

"Dad met a lady at the Magic Box," Josh said, his gaze fixed on his mother's back.

Buffy froze. The tightness in her chest intensified. "Oh?" she asked, keeping her voice even.

"She works there. Her name is Anya." Josh bit off the head of a dinosaur nugget, carefully observing his mother's reaction.

Buffy squeezed her eyes shut, gutted. She had vivid memories of the ex-demon. Anya would have been Xander's girlfriend if they hadn't slept together that night.

"Was she nice?" Buffy asked, trying hard to keep her voice from quivering.

"I guess. She's kinda weird, but dad seems to like her. He said that they dated a long time ago. Before I was born. Did you know her?"

Buffy turned off the faucet and faced Josh, wiping her hands dry with a towel. "Um… no. Not really."

"Mom?"

"Yes, sweetheart?"

"Would you be mad if my dad started being with Anya?" He asked.

Buffy swallowed the lump in her throat and attempted to appear stoic in front of her son. "No. If that's what he truly wanted, I wouldn't be mad." She told him the truth, omitting the bit about how it would eviscerate her heart.

"But you love my dad?" He probed, attempting to grasp his parents' perspective on the separation.

Buffy took a step closer, resting her elbows on the counter island and looked across at him. "I will always love your dad. He's a good man." She stretched her arm across the counter and took Josh's hand in hers. "And the best part about him is that he gave me you." She lovingly smiled at him. "You are a constant reminder of everything that is good between us."

Josh lowered his gaze to his mother's hand, which was clutching his own. He fixed his gaze on her platinum diamond wedding band, which was wrapped around her finger. "When did you know that you loved my dad?"

Buffy stood up straight, leaning her palms on the counter island, exhaling a breath. When did she realise she was in love with Xander? Was it outside the Bronze when he kissed her? Was it when she told him she was pregnant and he embraced her, whispering into her ear that everything would be okay? Maybe it was even before that.

It was difficult for her to pinpoint the precise moment when she realised she loved Xander. Simply put, she was just in love with him. It was as easy as that. Loving Xander was as natural as breathing. Buffy didn't think about it; it was merely a byproduct of who she is.

Perhaps that was the problem, she stopped telling him how much she loved him. She took his love for granted, effectively overlooking his insecurities and telling him that he was being ridiculous. It wasn't that she flirted with other men or gave Xander any reason to think she was unfaithful, but she could've soothed his worries with a simple, 'I love you'.

"I don't remember ever not being in love with your dad. The years before we were together feels like an entirely different life." She told her young son.

Josh looked at Buffy for a few seconds, contemplating her answer before returning to silently finish his food.

Buffy carefully twisted her wedding band around her left-hand ring finger.