Chapter Five: One Thing is Clear
Author's note: Some of you are confused. I beg of you again, refer to the dates. And sory this took so long to get up.
December 3rd 2020, Tree Hill High School, Tree Hill, North Carolina
"Happy? You've seen it all, and they're few and far between, Brooke," said Nathan, the sad, wistful look in his eyes replaced by a harder, ironic one.
"That's bullshit, Nathan. You were the happiest couple I've ever seen, and I've got an inkling that I wasn't there for the best of it," she said.
"This isn't all my problem, Brooke. You can't blame it all on me. Why'd you make out with Lucas, anyway? Why'd you have to ruin it for them?" he demanded.
"He was fine. And a girl needs to know the limits of her power," said Brooke.
"That's insane. You have limits? What the hell are they?"
Brooke raised an eyebrow.
"You, once upon a time. The only thing I've never had for the taking."
Nathan didn't like this, the idea of belonging to someone else. He wanted to belong to himself again. He thought back to the day he'd stopped being his own man, and he'd started possessing her like nothing else in his life.
"I'm not anyone's for the taking, Brooke," he said warningly. She scoffed.
"Please. Tell me honestly that if Haley walked into the room right this second you wouldn't sweep her into your arms and ride off into the sunset." Both stared at the door, though they knew she'd never come.
"If Haley walked in that door..."
Brooke looked down, feeling shameful.
"Yeah. I know."
Nathan reached across the table and put his hand on top of hers. For an instant, he realized that she was what Haley never could be: touchable. There, right in front of him. He was stupid to ignore it.
"Aren't the happy ones more painful?" he asked slowly. She smiled in almost her old way, and for an instant looked like Brooke Davis.
"Not if they make you smile," she said honestly.
April 3rd 1999, The Scott Mansion, Tree Hill, North Carolina
"NATHAN?" Haley's voice ran through the Scott mansion, and she relaxed as she heard heavy footsteps come toward her.
"Haley!" came a voice in surprise, one that sounded happy to see her. One that was not Nathan's.
"Hi Mr. Scott," she said, somewhat awkwardly. She'd been Nathan's girlfriend since the eighth grade and was well aquainted with him, but after her friendship with Lucas it was difficult to be at ease in his presence.
"How're you doing, Haley? I feel like we haven't seen much of you lately," he said.
"I guess not," she said, shrugging her bare shoulders.
"Is everything all right with Nathan? He loves you so much," said Dan honestly. Haley smiled contentedly.
"We're great, Mr. Scott."
"Well, that's good. Because one of these days I'm always hoping you'll be refer to me as something more familiar," he said, turning away as NAthan ran in the door.
Haley smiled. Someday, she'd like to call him Dad as well.
"Hales!" She spun around and fell into his open arms, relishing in the that he loved her. Even if he'd never told her. Even if she'd never told him.
Hands linked, they went upstairs to his room. She'd been there a thousand times, but somehow it was still unfamiliar territory. Probably because their most significant events had happened elsewhere-mostly in their special place by the river.
"What were you and Dad talking about?" asked Nathan, moving to his desk, carefully steering clear of the bed to avoid unecessary implications.
"Us. He's really proud of you, Nathan," said Haley. Nathan looked as if about to say something in retaliation, but stopped as Lucas walked past the room. Ever since Dan had taken in after Karen's death the year before, Dan had mellowed. Or pretended to. No one knew for sure.
"That all?"
Haley stared at the back of his head, bent down slightly. At his loose hoodie with the sleeves rolled up, showing his forearms. Now more grown up looking with dark hair. His jeans and how they cupped the shape of his ass.
"No."
She'd hoped that her insufficient comment would cause him to turn around, but he did not. He knew where this was going.
"He said that you loved me."
Nathan turned around immediately. Her words had the desired affect.
"Have you ever doubted it?"
Slowly, Haley nodded. He crossed the room in three strides, pulled her in to him by her shoulders and kissed her. Their kiss was passionate, but he broke it off before his hands could travel down her body.
"I love you, Haley James. I always have," he swore.
"Will you always?" she asked, her voice small, her eyes large in her slightly tanned face.
"Always."
"Good. Because I love you, too."
Somehow amidst their kisses and a flurry of once forbidden touches, they made it to the bed. As he pulled off the yellow sundress she was wearing, he realized that underneath it she was only wearing her cotton underwear. He smirked and admired her, the parts of her he'd never before seen. As she blushed and made to cover herself, he took her hands in hers and pulled her in to him until their lips again met.
"I don't know... I won't be... It might..." Nathan's voice was fractured and nervous. She knew. This would probably hurt like hell.
"Don't. I want everything with you, Nathan. Forever."
Awkwardly he lowered her on to the bed. She flinched in surprise as his lips touched her breast before she relaxed and let herself enjoy the sensation.
Their eyes locked. He used one arm to suppost himself, and wrapped the other around her. She held her breath as her legs opened and he slowly slid in to her.
As he reached her barrier, he moved past and she gasped involuntarily in pain. His own face attempted to hold back the pleasure he felt, embarrassed that he was enjoying it so much more than she.
Their eyes met again. Staring down at hers, they seemed to want him to continue. But for his sake and not hers. He withdrew quickly. He sat up and pulled her naked body into his chest, running his hand comfortingly over her back, calming her shattered nerves.
She tucked her head into his shoulder and buried her face into his warm skin, trying to quench her tears and hide her alarm. He tangled his hand into her long hair.
"I'm sorry," he said earnestly.
"I'm fine," she promised.
"We don't have to..."
"It'll get better."
He wondered why she was prolonging it. He wanted it, she didn't. She was pretending he did. He was pretending he didn't.
"I love you," he said again.
"I know. Always and Forever, right?" she said, sounding almost mocking.
December 3rd 2020, Tree Hill High School, Tree Hill North Carolina
"What, that's your best memory?" asked Brooke in surprise.
"God no. It was terrible. It was weeks before we did it again. I'm glad we did, because it led to much better things. But no, that wasn't my happiest. Not by a long shot."
"And that's where the Always and Forever thing came from... What?"
Brooke looked up to see a genuine smile on his face. He knew it wasn't her he was smiling about, but it made her smile anyway.
"Tell me."
July 23rd 1999, The Scott Manion, Tree Hill, North Carolina
Haley looked up at Nathan as he went around the room looking for his jeans. Only in his boxers, she was slightly aroused. But her arousal was never a good thing. It led to things she still didn't altogether like.
"You okay?" he asked. He wasn't so concerned anymore. Maybe he now had all he wanted with her. Maybe it was the beginning of the end.
When she didn't answer, the turned back to her and scrutinized the blank expression on her face.
"What's wrong?"
She shook her head and attempted to smile.
"Don't worry. It will get better. And there's more to us than just this," he promised. He sat down next to her and touched his palm to her heart.
"I'm not worried," she promised. Placing her hand atop his, she leaned forward and lightly kissed him.
He pulled away, and she raised her eyebrows slightly. He stared at her for a second. Her light brown hair, almost blonde in the summer, her big brown eyes. He never wanted to be away from those eyes.
"Nathan..."
His name came out of her lips in amazement as he reached into his bedside table and pulled out a small black velvet box.
"I know this is crazy. And I know you'll say no. But I know above all that I love you, Haley. And I'll wait. We can get married after high school. After college. After everything. I don't care, because I know that this isn't about to go away. I know that this is how it's going to be. Haley James, will you marry me?"
He flipped open the box, revealing a small diamond on a gold band. She shut her eyes tightly, tears forming on them.
"Are you okay?" he asked with trepedation.
"I'm scared, Nathan."
He was silent.
"I'm scared because I love you. I'm scared because I know you love me and always will, and I don't think I deserve that. I'm scared because the rest of my life is starting right here, right now and I don't know if I can handle that. I'm scared because I know I can't say no, and even more, I don't want to."
Tears now rolling down her cheeks, she nodded, a smile breaking on her lips, a laugh escaping them.
He slid the ring on to her finger and leaned forward to kiss her. He kissed her forehead, her nose and finally her lips.
December 3rd 2020, Tree Hill High School, North Carolina
"So this was what, two months before I got to Tree Hill? I never did understand why she wasn't threatened by my," said Brooke.
"She had no reason to be."
"Does she now?" asked Brooke.
Nathan stared out the window. This was where the story was good. After this, it got much, much more complicated.
