Chapter Twenty-Five - Another Dimension
Clark Kent's head hurt worse than it had ever hurt before, and for some reason his super-hearing was even more acute than usual. Why did people have to breathe so loudly? And then he suddenly heard the telltale humming that indicated the Tardis was once again undertaking a journey and his headache went into overdrive.
Staggering into the console room, the humming of the Tardis still ringing in his ears, he was alarmed to see Lex and Chloe sleeping on the floor, Chloe wrapped in Lex's arms. Trying to ignore the sight, he turned his attention towards The Doctor.
"So which of the countless realities are we in today?" he asked, trying to ignore his first, and hopefully last, hangover.
The Doctor looked at him confused. "Countless realities?"
"I thought there were infinite realities," replied Clark.
"Yes, there are infinite realities, but countably infinite not uncountably infinite," explained The Doctor. "Some people even number them."
"So where are we?" asked an irritable Clark.
"It's Jimmy's world, but not the one where he's Jimmy. Anyway, he's gone out to have a look around. I promised him the rest of us would stay in here. The last thing he needs is that world's time messing about with, although if it hadn't been he wouldn't have been born in the first place."
"Thanks for clarifying everything," said Clark insincerely. "And there's no need to shout."
The Doctor looked confused, and then remembered Clark's super-hearing. "Sorry," he whispered back.
Jimmy Olsen walked through the Metropolis streets that he knew so well. Unfortunately it wasn't quite his Metropolis, and its Jimmy Olsen wasn't quite him. Also, Lois' apartment number was different, as he'd found out the first time when he'd tried to contact her, although Jimmy had no clue what obscure change Tempus must have done in the past to cause that.
Just like on his last visit, he wandered into the Daily Planet building, seeing the familiar faces (and the unfamiliar Jimmy Olsen), none of whom recognized him in the slightest, and also, just like last time, he exited the building, feeling emptiness and regret for the reality that fate had stolen from him.
"Don't look so glum, Jimmy," said a black-clad bearded figure suddenly appearing from out of nowhere.
"You know me?" asked Jimmy.
"Sure we met that Christmas," replied the figure. "Well, actually that was the other Jimmy."
Jimmy was incredulous. "Wait a minute. You know about me and the other Jimmy?"
"Yeah, but I'm fifth-dimensional so I cross all the realities. I'm surprised you haven't met me yet. Mxyzptlk's the name, but all my friends call me Mr."
"No, sorry, I've not seen you before."
"It might be because I look different there, not dashing like I do here. Sometimes I'm an old bald guy with a hat. Sometimes I put on a silly accent and try and blend in with the natives."
"No, sorry," replied Jimmy.
"Well, it doesn't matter anyway," replied Mr. Mxyptlk. "I wanted to talk to you about what's been happening to you recently. All these crazy dimensions you've been visiting , all this ridiculous confusion. I was afraid that you might think I was behind it all."
"No, honestly I didn't," explained Jimmy. "After all I've got no clue who you are. Now, I better be getting back to the others."
"Can I come with you? In the Tardis? Please, please, let me? I've never met my other dimensional selves before, just seen their shadows, overheard their voices, and I'm starved of intelligent conversation around here."
"No, I'm sorry. It's all getting ridiculously full now and I don't think The Doctor would put up with any more."
"But I'm a useful guy to have around," insisted Mr. Mxyzptlk, now on his knees. "I can do magic and tricks."
"Can you pull a habit out of a rat?" asked Jimmy, suddenly curious, remembering something Madame Xanadu had said earlier.
Mr. Mxyzptlk produced a rat out of thin air and then proceeded to pull a nun's habit out of the back of it.
Jimmy flinched at the rat's anguished sounds.
"Hey, that's nothing," explained Mr. Mxyzptlk. "You should have heard the noise he made when I pushed it in."
"Will you please, please go away," demanded Jimmy.
Mr. Mxyzptlk's bottom lip began trembling.
"Now!" added Jimmy.
And then Mr. Mxyzptlk's face broke into a smile. "Hey, wait, you don't know how to get rid of me, do you?"
"Clearly not," said Jimmy, shrugging his shoulders. "Care to enlighten me?"
"What, you've got to be kidding. There's no way I'm going to let you trick me into saying kltpzyxM -"
Jimmy looked at the empty space where Mr. Mxyzptlk had been pleading a second before and then, shaking his head, he returned back to the Tardis.
"You're just in time," said The Doctor as Jimmy entered the Tardis. "I've organized a memorial service for Lana Lang. Just stand over there with the others."
Jimmy headed over towards them. Clark, with his head bowed. Rose, with her bruised chin and wearing a pair of dark sunglasses to hide the excesses of the night before. Zod and Ursa who, for once, seemed to be dressed appropriately. On the other hand, Lex still had that stupid outfit on that Jimmy had seen him sleeping in earlier.
"Chloe's going to say some words," said The Doctor, as Chloe Sullivan wandered into the console room. She'd been away, in her room, listening to the tape The Doctor had bought the night before, while she practiced her speech over and over again. She couldn't afford to make a mistake - this was her best friend she was remembering. All the glib comments such as how she liked to be with Lana because it made her look smarter had been excised. Sure Lana had some faults, but today she'd come to praise Lana, not to bury her, and everything had to be perfect - for her, for Clark (both of him) and especially of all for Lana, wherever she was.
Chloe slipped the tape into the tape deck, and then, looking over at the others, she began her oration.
"Lana Lang was my friend," she began and then, with words more powerful than any she'd written before or would ever write again she expressed the wonder that was Lana Lang's life and the tragedy that was Lana Lang's death. By the end even Ursa and Zod were in tears, as was Chloe herself. But her words didn't matter - what mattered was Lana Lang herself, and, as Chloe pressed the Play button on the tape deck, she hoped that they'd all remember Lana Lang with the same affection that she did.
Time is measured in many ways - the dropping of grains of sand, the movement of a pendulum, the burning of a candle, but even the most precise of measuring devices couldn't accurately measure the infinitesimal amount of time that passed between Chloe realizing to her horror that she'd forgot to rewind the tape and the subsequent sound of Ding-Dong! The Witch Is Dead echoing throughout the Tardis.
