Chapter Fifty-Two - Bad Timing

A person who looked exactly like Chloe Sullivan (but thought exactly like Lex Luthor) entered Lana Lang's hospital room to see Clark Kent standing there, leaning against the Tardis.

"Surprised to see you here," the Chloe who was really Lex said. "I thought you'd be inside with Lana."

"I was listening in case you shouted for help. I wasn't sure that I'd be able to hear your voice from inside the Tardis," explained Clark.

"So you heard all of my conversation with Lex?"

Clark shook his head. "No, of course not, Chloe. I was just listening to the sounds of your voices, not what they said, although…"

"Although you would have rushed in the second I needed you?" said Chloe (who was really Lex), finishing the sentence for Clark.

He nodded. "But you didn't need me, did you, Chloe? I don't know what Lex did or said, but I heard his groans as you attacked him."

Chloe (who was really Lex) looked at the judgmental look on Clark's face. "I'm sorry, Clark," she said, suddenly pretending to be on the verge of tears, "but if you'd heard the things he said…"

"Hey, it's okay," said Clark, who, seeing the look on Chloe's face, now wanted to comfort rather than reprimand her. "Lex knows how to manipulate people, make them do things they'd never normally do."

"Thanks," said Chloe, giving Clark a smile. "I'd forgotten just how good a friend you could be."

Clark smiled back at her with his one-tooth-missing smile and gave her a hug. "You can't blame yourself for what happened. It was all Lex's fault."

Chloe nodded. "You're right, Clark. I guess I was just being too hard on myself."


Meanwhile, the real Chloe Sullivan, trapped in Lex's body, clenched her teeth as numerous nerve endings throughout that body kept insisting on telling her how much pain she was in. Trying, but failing, to ignore her agony, she struggled along the deserted hospital corridor, on her long trek back to the Tardis.

It was at this point in time that Chloe suddenly realized the fact that she didn't have a clue as to where the Tardis actually was. Well, to be fair, she knew that it was probably in, or near, Lana's room, but unfortunately she didn't know exactly where, in this vast hospital, Lana's room was situated.

Still, she couldn't give up, and so she continued hobbling down the corridor until she spotted a phone inside one of the rooms. Filled with a new hope, she rushed, as best she could, to the phone, and then dialed her cell phone number.


"Lex won't be coming with us," explained Clark to The Doctor. "He's in no fit state to at the moment."

"Guess we'll have to pick him up at the end of our adventure," replied The Doctor, "although that's not what I thought would happen."

Rose was just about to ask The Doctor to elaborate further on his cryptic comment when she suddenly heard a cell phone ringing. "Chloe, is that your phone?"

Chloe took her cell phone out, looked at it quizzically, and then turned it off. "Nothing important. So, when are we leaving?"


Several floors above, Chloe (trapped in Lex's body) dialed her cell phone number again, but, as before, it was to no avail. Then she remembered that Rose had phoned her, back in that gremlin-infested building, but there was no way that she'd be able to remember that number. There was only one alternative left. Seconds later, she was on the phone to the hospital's main desk.

"Hello, could you please tell me what room Lana Lang's in? … Yes , I said Lana Lang - that's right - like in the comic books… Maybe, she's using a different name, could you just run through the patients you've got? … Okay, I guess that's impractical. Any rooms with a big blue telephone box in them? … No, this isn't a prank call. If it helps, she's really pretty… Room 222. Thanks a lot. You've been a great help."


"I guess we may as well set off for the next reality now," said The Doctor, turning from Clark and Chloe back to the Tardis' console.

As Chloe smiled, Clark suddenly shouted "Wait!"

"What is it?" asked Rose.

"It's Lana … she's awake," replied Clark, before speeding away towards the medical bay and Lana.

"Guess our journey will have to wait," said The Doctor, as he turned away from the console and started to run towards the medical bay.

Rose saw the look of disappointment on Chloe's face. "I know how you feel. I want to get this adventure over with too. Still, that's The Doctor - never passes up a chance to run down some corridors."


Meanwhile, Zod had also heard Lana's waking up and, as much as he wanted to avoid Ursa at that moment, he also wanted to make sure that Lana didn't reveal Louise's true murderer to Kal.

And so he found himself flying through the Tardis' labyrinthine corridors, towards Lana's voice, when suddenly he turned to enter a dark corridor containing Ursa, who was blocking his way, not to mention holding a glowing green rock.

Stopping suddenly, to prevent Ursa and his unborn child being destroyed by his momentum, Zod suddenly felt the effects of Ursa's kryptonite and fell to his knees.

"Kneeling before me, Zod?" she asked. "I'd prefer it if you grovel."

And with that, her booted foot swung into Zod's face knocking him to the floor.

Zod looked up to see Ursa looking down at him, the green rock illuminating her features.

"So, this little rock really is painful to you. I wasn't sure if Kal was over-dramatizing just because he wasn't used to real pain. Speaking of real pain…"

"Ursa," said Zod, sweat pouring from his head. "I'm sorry that I didn't tell you."

"My dear Zod," said Ursa, putting one hand over his mouth, while tracing the first letter of his name on his chest with the rock. "You might think that I'm mad at you for not telling me, but I'm even madder that you could fall into this trap of mine. If we're going to be the victors here then you can't be so careless in the future. After all, who knows how many more of these little green rocks could be lying throughout the realities. Now, how painful are these rocks?"

Ursa, keeping her hand firmly over Zod's mouth, lay the rock on Zod's chest, leaving her other hand free. "I wonder if they're more painful than this."

As Zod flinched at Ursa's next action, his screams muffled by her hand, Ursa smiled. "Didn't think so... and there's no way they could be more painful than this."

Zod looked up at Ursa in horror, bracing himself for whatever punishment she was about to inflict next.

Picking up the green rock, she lifted her hand off his mouth. Now that he could talk, he was tempted to beg for mercy, but he knew, from others' experiences, that that would just encourage her. Slowly she put her hand into the folds of her costume, and was just about to take something out, when she stopped.

"Actually Zod, I think I've done enough .. for now. I was just trying to get it into your thick skull …" she said, tapping the rock against his head for emphasis, "that you have to be more careful this time. I've already seen one Superman outwit you and remove your powers … I really wouldn't like to see that sort of thing happen again. Do I make myself clear?"

Zod nodded.

Ursa put the piece of kryptonite back into its lead-lined box and looked down at the helpless Zod lying there before her.

"I hope you've been paying attention," she said, as she turned her back on him and started to walk away. "There'll be a test later."


"Lana, you're awake," said Clark, suddenly appearing in the medical bay, as if from out of nowhere, in order to state the obvious.

"Clark, where did you come from?" said a surprised Lana. "And where did all your cuts and bruises go?"

"Well…" began Clark.

"You must have dreamt it," interrupted Jimmy Olsen, trying to protect Clark's secret. "There was this weird hallucination-inducing monster that attacked you in a dimension you probably can't remember."

While Clark looked at Jimmy, totally amazed at the implausibility of his cover-up, Lana pondered his words. "Dreamt it?" she finally said. "But it was all so real. It was just after I'd come back from Heaven."

"Heaven?" asked Clark.

"Yes, I went to Heaven," explained Lana matter-of-factly. "I met Death, my parents, Whitney, God."

"You met God?" asked an incredulous out-of-breath Doctor who'd just reached the room.

"Yes. She looked just like me … although not quite as pretty."

"Sounds like you dreamt that too," said Jimmy.

Lana looked at Jimmy skeptically, but then looked at Clark's face, now perfect except for a missing tooth, and then she noticed that she wasn't in a hospital but in the Tardis, and then she remembered that weird 1961 Smallville where Clark had been an angel of all things. It must have all been a dream - it was the only explanation that made any sense.

"I guess I must have done," said Lana smiling. "What a strange and peculiar dream."

"Actually, Lana," said Clark, stepping towards her. "I think you should know the truth about me."

"As long as you're not going to tell me you can fly and that bullets bounce off your chest," said Lana, as she remembered that oh-so-real nightmare with the bullet ricocheting off the drifter into her body. "After my dream, that's the last thing I want to hear."

Clark was silent for a moment. "It'll wait."

"Good idea," said Chloe, who'd just arrived, and wasn't really Chloe anyway. "In the meantime, maybe we should carry on with our quest to stop Ultra Woman and save all of the Supermen."

The Doctor nodded in agreement. "Let's all get back to the console room then and give Lana some peace."

Clark looked uncertainly at Lana, nervous at the thought of leaving her.

"If you want I'll stay with Lana," offered Chloe. "It'll give us a chance to catch up."

"It's okay," said Lana, brushing her covers away. "It sounds like I've done far too much sleeping already." And then Lana got up out of bed and, with Clark supporting her, started making her way, with the rest of them, back to the console room.

On the way back, they encountered Ursa. "Lana - you're alive. I'm so incredibly happy," said Ursa with utter insincerity.

"Nice to see you, Ursa," said Lana, who managed to sound totally convincing thanks to her years as a waitress.

"Lana!" said Zod, suddenly appearing out of nowhere.

Seeing the man who'd killed Louise, Lana suddenly flinched.

"What is it, Lana?" asked Clark

"Nothing, Clark," she replied, pulling herself together. "Just a bad dream."


Chloe Sullivan, with her new shiny head and black wardrobe provided by Lex, staggered out of the elevator and towards room 222. As she looked through the door, she could see the Tardis standing there.

Breathing a sigh of relief, she made one last effort and managed to reach the Tardis' door, only to feel a sudden pain in her chest (or rather Lex's).

Not now. Not when she was so close.

As one of her hands clutched her chest, Chloe, ignoring the pain as best she could, ignoring the loud noise she could suddenly hear in her head, swung her other hand at the Tardis' door.

As her hand passed straight through it, Chloe suddenly realized, to her horror, that the loud pulsating noise she could hear in her head was actually coming from the Tardis.