Empty
She stood with her back to the wind. Her long, raven's wing hair that was so dark it would send ink into a shamed seclusion is tousled over her thin shoulders that fully brace the chill. Wrapping her slender arms around her lithe form, she shivers. Turning an about face, so that the girl is now facing this howling gust head on, she chews on her lower lip in well thought anticipation. This girl's high cheek bones immediately flushed a soft crimson. Her softly freckled nose turned bright and parted rose peach lips quiver in a state of frost. Watery cerulean eyes close to brace the force of the scream upon light grey rouged lids. Thick, dark lashes flutter against paling skin.
Warmth
Endangering safety is manifested in her numbing frame as forbidden warmth swarms every pore. Meandering heat entices goose pimpled skin to shudder with relief. Hot dancing breath tickles her ear now turning an unhealthy shade of light blue, with no warning of returning to its healthy tone. Earrings jingle at the extreme effort of the surrounding winter land. The man wraps around his lovely desire from behind, pulling her soft form against his muscled chest with the hope to ensnare the delectable beauty. How he has longed for a taste and pause here she stands waiting in opportunity's wake.
Mockery
Crystal tears flow passed closed lids and glide down freezing apple cheeks. The sadness overwhelms the restricting boundaries of her proverbial, emotional heart to flood her weary being like a rapid river pushing the limits of its banks. Obvious knowledge of his quest shudders down her spine and of his wanton belief that she will succumb strikes a chord within her, and oh, what a sour note. Darkening blue lips tug down with a dying determination and grey tinted eyes stare unfocused with a grave senselessness at the alabaster scenery at present still untouched and pristine. A sullen morbidity electrocutes the air with a shocking energy, but all the while gravity weighs down on her heart like millions of sand bags.
Temptation
Many moons have passed and still she stands with a stiff posture that aches in her back. Unforgiving longing surges through her ambience to release the awaiting emotions perched ready for its chance to express the overpowering sensations inside her body. Fate has brought upon her a scorching being to unleash herself within, but yet she hesitates because she knows his scheme. None the less, she caves under the stress of her deserted nature.
The welling contempt and self-loathing encourage her to defeat herself further. Force the hatred and depression to sink and engrave in her skin, so that it may never leave. Indulge in this for it will never come again. The slick skin, the humid breath, the wandering hands, and the movements of pure erotic pleasure slice through her bodily frame accompanied by the expected pain. It wasn't supposed to be this way. Ripping in and out, crushing her underneath the ocean waves by the rip tide not even she all knowing could foresee. Then, the finale, left dangling once again upon the ground in her suppressed world at her own. A screeching moan, which only the possessed or mentally challenged would release, passes her mute, bruised, swollen lips sanity is left beyond her reach.
Forgotten
Once they have what they desire, all shall leave and once again leave her upon this snowing precipice of yearning with a decision. A difficult decision, a hard battle fought at the very core of our flesh and soul. Every living creature has overcome this urge to just drop the weight of the world and fall to the welcomed darkness. The edge does not slope and there would be no chance for escape once the decision is made. Allow myself the eternal, immortal slumber of the gods or stay in my place to accept my destiny of loneliness. A true decision, and so she stands contemplating the choice.
Acceptance
Standing once again with her back to the wind as it rakes its pale, bone fingers down her spine; her face is down turned with shame and guilt. The scars are far too deep to be healed and now her soul is wild, untamed, clawing for that painful agony once again! Cobalt eyes rose heavenwards searching for a purpose that no one has ever uttered. Blue tinted, frozen skin shines dull for all prying eyes that rip their way into her world, just as the will has left her truly.
The strength of gravity, that cruel natural bastard that allows no one to reach true heights and fly, grips her with a passion and pulls her down the lonely slope to the changing deep. She does not struggle as her mind falls to slumber and body fades to black shadow. All memory of her has been erased and only the passing hungry thoughts of her previous, solo aggressor will flash in remembrance. But not guilt shall mourn upon his unblemished, perfect face as he sets out on a newly acquired quest for a new victim.
Truth
In the land of no return, no one ever truly enters for they were there all along. They must only be aware and awaken their weakened senses to the harsh reality of their fate. It is then, that they will fall to the inevitable result, except there are the select few that realize the truth and break the illusion sooner than the rest of their kind. Yet...they are pitied for being weak, but it is they who have the courage to end it before they have something too important to lose. Call them flawed, call them distant, but they are real and will sleep forever in the peace they never grasped on the plane of the living, the land we call Earth.
Wide eyes blurt open to stare blankly, unseeing at the pale cream ceiling. Kagome slowly closed her eyes as she released a deep breath. She bit her full bottom lip in an attempt to stifle the groan that threatened to seethe through her teeth, but the room remained passive and silent to hidden screams of the soul inside the young woman lying uncomfortably wrapped within the pristine silk sheets. The lavender cotton comforter was careening haphazardly off the bottom of the mattress that was actually only a foot and a half from the floor.
"Why?"
Her soft voice pierced the suffocating silence of the dorm. She owned her own apartment, but it was her last year. Soon, she could leave this oppressive atmosphere of a world consumed with materialism and excavate her own existence without having to live under this overbearing pretense.
Kagome was twenty two and surviving her final year of Tokyo University. The college was renowned for its successful graduates and was very prestigious. It wasn't simple to be accepted, but for Higurashi Kagome, it was no great effort of a task at all. Being the valedictorian of her school, but also one prone to community service, what university wouldn't want to bless their campus with this creature? But Kagome wasn't a beauty queen despite her goddess-like potential.
In high school, she spent her time helping others and her school work. This girl wasn't one to spend a half hour on her hair or on such frivolous activities such as what to wear. The result was very few dates, but many refused offers, at least in the beginning. Towards the later years of her high school career, the men, unless either stupid or persistent, left her to her ways, but still gave her the appreciative glance as she passed them in the halls.
One of her only boyfriends was named Hojo and he was…well…Hojo. The guy was nice and extremely polite. His manners impeccable and he respected her completely. But maybe that was what she didn't find attractive? Most all girls would fall over him their faces full of blushes, but Kagome never felt the draw of magnetism. Hojo was her age and if she remembered correctly, he was also accepted to Tokyo U.
They broke up after about six months in eleventh grade, but still kept in touch. He visited her every now and then, and vice versa. Actually, one weekend a month is dedicated to him. It is surprising how well they get along when it isn't romantically. Who ever thought the two of them could be friends? Well, it wasn't unusual to Kagome; Hojo respected her opinion, moved on, and continued their relationship on a friends-only basis.
Kagome had extremely, if not too long in the opinions of the fashion trend setters, black hair that reached her knees. However, on a rare whim, one she is rarely struck with, but also abides by when in occurrence, the young woman stripped her backside to be left bare of hair. Yes- nearly a foot and a half was cut from her extensive tresses to rest, now anyways, at her hips. Now the shortened locks curled somewhat in their loss of weight in a natural wave that cascaded down like a midnight waterfall.
But her most intriguing characteristic was her abnormal blue eyes. The brilliant cerulean almost held an iridescence that led many to believe that as the solar divinity was stolen with spindly fingers into the slumbering night, they twin pair of ocean orbs would light a chamber with an ethereal appearance. But they didn't, people just loved to behold the notion to delude themselves into such a ridiculous belief.
Kagome was set apart for her long, creamy legs and dainty feet with a perfect set of toes. Her skin shined and was almost alabaster in its glorified paleness. But it wasn't a ghostly white or a sickly tone, but that which would be the expected product of a hime. A treasure left inside the sheltering walls of her palace, except for the infrequent events that spurred her to venture out into the world, but not without her parasol.
Her flat stomach and full bust complemented her small form, but not overly so to create a stunning and desirably curvaceous figure. But now, as she lay trapped within her sheets with a light sheen of sweat on her forehead and a tormented torrent of emotions plaguing her heart, she was the epitome of helplessness.
This recurring dream always tipped her over the edge. Kagome was usually an actively emotional person, but consistently in a positive response. Only this one flash of her past would crack the proverbial walls protecting her scarred and healing heart. No one, at least to her knowledge, knew of that day.
And every single wane of the moon that led into the blossoming birth of the solar deity would cause another riot within her caked soul. Her very essence was a desert and longing for water to the point of hallucination. In her dreams, except this one, were filled to the edge with erotic visions. The yearnings of affection of her heart were unmistakable, but ignored by her conscious self.
Every human being needs love and receives it whether from parents, friends, or possibly, though most likely from a lover it is accessible. But to Kagome it has been washed down stream by a rogue current that still to this day and time steal her self-esteem and courage. Yes the threat is gone and the evil long destroyed, but the male defeats her immobile through the nightmares cursing her sleeping mind.
Would she ever escape her past?
"What is peace?"
Does it even exist…for I have never felt it.
This is later than expected. Halfway through the whole thing was deleted and I don't even know how. I was so frustrated I couldn't sit back down to finish for hours. It is reasonably similar, but not to my standards. I really appreciate all reviews, they keep my updates regular. Well, until Monday or possibly not depending on you. I need a reason to write.
