ANTEA
They were finally able to cross the Twins. Some of Robb's men had to stay behind, Tallhart would have led them; lord Frey wanted for some soldiers to stay outside of his castle as a guarantee, as if putting one of his daughters in Winterfell hadn't been enough. For all those requests he had wanted, lord Frey seemed more of a greedy man, to Antea, and greed was something that she had never understood, or tolerate.
"You're being more nervous than usual" Robb said the night before they had to leave the Twins "As much as Rickon"
"I wish" she said thinking at her most fierce among her siblings. He loved to run, and he had quite the temper. Antea knew that he would become a great warrior, and she hoped he would live long enough to hold a steel sword.
"What is the matter?" Robb asked her taking her hands making her sit down.
"I do not know" she said in a whisper squeezing her twin's fingers. She felt like she wasn't able to understand herself anymore, she got angry and scared, nervous and then calm. She feared for Robb, knowing that soon he would have to face the battlefield. Angry for her Father's imprisonment. She felt like crying, but no tears would leave her eyes, she just wanted to scream.
"I feel anger, Robb. All the time" she confessed. Robb observed her with sad eyes "And now, you are going to war, what will happen? How am I about to let you go, not knowing..." even the chance of Robb not coming back made her heart ache. What was she if not with Robb? They came in that world together in Riverrun and since they had left their mother's belly, they never got separated. And now they were moving towards the Lannisters and she would have to look him ride towards it without being able to do anything. Her eyes move to Grey Wind.
Protect him. Please just protect him, Antea found herself thinking as her eyes fixed on the wolf's.
"My sweet sister" Robb said hugging her close as her fingers moved to clench the fur of his cloak finding comfort as always. Robb's embrace was able to ease her sorrow just as much as her Father's. She felt secure, even from herself.
"I need you here with me. Your presence will give me so much strength" he said kissing her temple "As Mother. And Theon" Antea took a breath with a little smile, not quite believing that only her being there could make all of them feel stronger. But she accepted the compliment, not wanting to argue, or get sad over stupid thoughts.
"It better be, dear brother" she said caressing his cheek "Without you I would lose my head" Robb smiled.
"It's the other way around, Antea."
Everyone at Winterfell had always addressed her as the only one able to speak to her twin brother during times of anger. Robb was passionate, and for that his nerves got the best of him, while Antea had always been happy with a smile on her face, never bothering with bad feeling. But since Antea had left Winterfell her always happy face became harder and her heart felt heavier, feeling safe only in her lord brother's presence. Even only looking at him, brought her great peace, like when they were riding moving South with their bannermen the next day. He was on his horse, in between lord Umber and Theon deep in conversation and Antea couldn't help but feel proud of who he was becoming. Her Father would be proud, as all her siblings.
"You were born in Riverrun" her Uncle's voice made her turn. She smiled at him reining closer to her horse "When did you visit last?"
Antea smiled.
"I know what you're doing" she said, making her Uncle smile "But I'm afraid this conversation will not last long, I've never been in the Riverlands. The same as my lord brother"
Robb and Antea had been born in Riverrun during King Robert's Rebellion. Their Father had gone South to fight against the Targaryens' Crown, just after his wedding with their Mother. The two of them barely knew each other, but they had their first children anyway.
Her Uncle chuckled.
"I've never been that close with my brother" he said with a hint of sadness in his voice "When I decided to take service with late Lord Arryn, my brother send me away" Antea felt sorry for him. She had always found comfort and happiness with her siblings, and her bastard brother Jon Snow. Her life was not the same without all of them together.
"I'm sorry to hear it" she said, as the man chuckled again.
"Do not be" he said "It was so long ago" Antea wasn't sure that a wound like that could ever heal just with time.
"There's no me without my siblings" Antea said thinking about how all of that had started. Her journey.
"I would do anything to protect them. Even... if I'm not sure how" her Uncle observed her, she could feel his eyes on her frame. Antea was trying so hard to observe her mother and learn from her. She didn't feel as good with word like her mother, or at keeping calm. She had to learn though. Robb needed her, her mother too.
"Your nerves are taking the best of you" her Uncle said kindly, then he started to fondle around his waist. Antea observed him unfastening his belt and then handing her a knife. Its handle was so black it seemed shining under the sun, there were carved trouts jumping all around it.
"It's beautiful" she said. The man smiled.
"It's for you" at his words, Antea's eyes widened in confusion.
"This was given to me from my brother at my sixteen name day" her Uncle explained "I've never told him, but..." he chuckled again "When the nerves took the best of me, I used to hold it against me, thinking about my family. My lord Father and lady Mother, my proclaimed righteous brother, and after years my sweet nephews" he said looking towards Antea's mother riding not too far from them.
"I would repeat to myself 'I am not afraid; I will be back home'" he continued "It helped me" she smiled at him looking again towards the knife. There were so many memories in that simple object. So much bravery, so much to fight for.
"Here" he encouraged her to take it.
"It is so dear to you" she said hesitantly, but he smiled again.
"Those memories are carved in my memory, as much as those trouts on the handle" he said "And I am old enough to keep them, while my dear niece could find strength in that" she smiled before reaching out to take in her hands the black handle. She would remember why she must keep fighting, keep being brave. She had to take her Father and her sisters back. She had to help Robb, Mother and Theon, so that they could all go back to Winterfell where Bran, Rickon and Cyel were waiting for them patiently. And one day she would go to the Wall to tell Jon and Cassie everything that had happened, making her half-brother proud of her.
She was holding that hopes dear. She was holding them as close and tight as much as were her fingers now; clenching at the black handle of the knife as she was waiting for her twin brother to come back from the battlefield.
It was night and the dark silent sky was disturbed by the sound of spears clenching against each other. Antea shivered every time she heard that distant noise. Robb was there leading the battle. He was young, but ready enough to make war strategies, but he was now there, fighting for real. Her Uncle was there too, she had just met him, but he was so gentle with her, like she had always known him, they couldn't lose him. And even Theon Greyjoy was out there. Foolish yet always at Robb's side. Cocky yet a skilled archer, so skilled that he had become one of her Uncle's picked scouts. Her heart clenched at the thought of not seen him coming back.
"It should not be long now, my lady," Hallis Mollen said to Antea's mother, that managed to remain composed and elegant on her horse, surrounded by thirty men, that were there to protect them in case the battle moved towards them.
"It will come when it comes" her mother answered.
Antea felt her heart explode in fear as she was trying to keep calm to not let her mother down. Her hand clenched tightly around the black handle that was tied up around her waist by a black leather belt.
I am not afraid; we will be back home.
Antea kept repeating to herself over and over as her eyes landed on her black direwolf. Shadow was not hiding like her usual, she was there waiting for her brother to come back. She was getting bigger by the day; it was almost impossible to believe that most of the time she went by unseen. Old Nan used to tell them that direwolves would be so big, their heads huge and their limbs long. They were not common wolves, and Antea wandered if her and her brother would have seen their pups become adults.
She turned again towards the sound of the battle. They were fighting against the Kingslayer and his soldiers. Robb and his men had ambushed them, as her Uncle, the Blackfish, had suggested knowing that Jamie Lannister lacked of patience, as he said. Robb had gone following their Father's words. The men must see their lord leading them, giving them courage.
Men and war, they went risking their lives, but Antea wasn't sure they knew the void that their death would have been to those who remained behind. The girl turned towards her mother, her face was grave, but her hands were white for the tight grip on the reins. Antea took a breath, before reaching out to took her mother's hand. It was cold and slightly trembling, but she gripped her daughter's hand just the same, keeping her head up and focused straight ahead.
Suddenly Antea saw Shadow standing up and after a moment the noise of horses moved towards their direction. Her mother hand closed around Antea's even more, hoping and praying that those were their soldiers coming towards them, and her son among them. Antea observed Shadow. She had seen her pup howling whenever there was something wrong, but she was there observing the dark forest, waving slowly her tail silently.
"He is safe" Antea found herself saying before she could stop herself, as Shadow turned to look at her with her golden eyes.
Laughters could be heard as the men approached. Antea let out a long hold breath and some tears when she spotted her twin brother's frame, coming back on a different horse than the one he had left with so many hours ago. He was coming back to them; Antea couldn't do anything to stop the tears running down her cheeks. She wanted to kick her horse to make it ran towards her twin, but she couldn't. Like it happened when she had seen him in Moath Cailin. She had to be strong, firm. But as he got closer, the girl spotted blood on him. Her mother must have seen it too because she said ""You're hurt"
"No," he said opening and closing his hand trying to understand if he was actually hurt "This is...Torrhen's blood, perhaps, or..." He shook his head "I do not know." he was shaking lightly, for someone that didn't knew him, he seemed perfectly still, but Antea knew her brother. She moved her horse to get closer to him. They looked at each other for a moment. They didn't need words to understand. Antea knew just by looking at him that he had seen terrible things, things that no one should ever see. And Robb knew how terrified Antea had been at the thought of losing him.
Then the sound of someone getting closer made the girl turn and a smile appeared on her face, seeing Theon Greyjoy with his usual smirk getting closer. They looked at each other and Theon's smirk got wider as Antea let out a little giggle. She had never been so glad to see him and some more tears ran down her cheeks.
But suddenly she heard Shadow growl and Antea's gaze moved to Theon's left side and her smile faded from her face once she saw the Kingslayer being thrown on the ground in front of her mother's horse.
Jamie Lannister.
He was there, just few feet from her. That man that had hurt her family for so long. She felt anger again, with a sense of accomplishment. But she would have felt satisfied only when she would have seen him dead, with his head on a pike. It would have been even a merciful death for someone so spiteful, too quick.
"You took him" Antea said to Robb.
"Lady Stark," said Jamie Lannister to their mother "I would offer you my sword, but I seem to have mislaid it." he was bloody and hurt, still he kept smirking and that made Antea even angrier.
"It is not your sword I want, ser," her mother answered unimpressed by his behavior "Give me my father and my brother Edmure. Give me my daughters. Give me my lord husband."
"I have mislaid them as well, I fear."
"A pity," her mother said coldly.
"Kill him, Robb," Theon said as he moved his horse to stop next to Antea. And the girl found herself nodding.
"No," Robb answered, making Antea frown. That man had crippled their brother, had killed Jory Cassel and their men and hurt their Father. And his family was keeping insult them.
"I fail to see why" Antea said glaring at the man who turned in her direction. But Robb shook his head. "He's more use alive than dead. And my lord father never condoned the murder of prisoners after a battle."
"A wise man," Jaime Lannister said, "and honorable."
"Something you will never know, Lannister" Antea said as the blond man smirked.
"Something that we share, my lady" Antea's anger grew, she felt like getting off her horse and stab him.
"Watch your mouth" exclaimed Theon raising his voice, making Antea put a hand on his forearm. The Kingslayer wasn't worth Theon's time.
"Take him away and put him in irons," Catelyn said, making Robb agree. He ordered for a strong man to guard him, wanting to keep Lord Karstark away from the man of Lannister.
"Why should lord Karstark want him dead?" asked their mother. Antea saw her brother becoming silent and look away. It was so painful to see him like that. He was always vital and smiling, he wasn't brooding or quiet.
"He..." he started "He killed them" Antea looked towards Theon, who took a breath. He had a bruise on his cheek and blood all over his armor. Lord Karstark's sons had talked to her just the day before, remembering the day they had come in Winterfell some years before, remembering dancing with her and Cyel during the feast. They were just few years older than Theon, that was not fair. To die by the hands of the Kingslayer. They told them that even when he was close to lose the battle, he kept fighting. He killed Eddard Karstark cutting his throat and then his brother Torrhen, cutting off his hand.
"All the time he was shouting for me" said Robb with sad eyes, trying to not let his emotion to take the best of him "If they hadn't tried to stop him—"
"Your men did what they were sworn to do, Robb" her mother said "They died protecting their liege lord. Grieve for them. Honor them for their valor. But not now" they had died trying to save Robb's life. It must have been so hard for him, knowing that they had lost their lives for that. But that was something that they all would have never forget.
They will be avenged, Antea thought, I will remember what they did for my brother.
"You may have lopped the head off the snake, but three quarters of the body is still coiled around my father's castle" their mother kept say "We have won a battle, not a war."
"But that was such a battle" exclaimed Theon from next to Antea, always cocky. Always foolishly brave.
"And Lord Tywin?" her mother said sternly, making Antea look towards her with a little glare "Have you perchance taken Lord Tywin, Theon?"
"No," Theon answered, smirk long gone.
"Until you do, this war is far from done." her mother kept saying. Antea knew that her mother was right, but treat him like that in front of the other men made Antea feel sorry for the young man.
"My mother is right" said Robb nodding his head "We still have Riverrun."
That night no one felt like sleeping and Antea had been with Robb, making sure he was unharmed even if the medic had reassured them that apart from some bruises and cuts, he was fine. They hadn't spoken much. She had never seen her brother so shaken up, hands trembling and eyes watering. He was so scared and now since he couldn't show it in front of his man, he kept everything inside. Antea had seen death. She had seen people being killed in front of her eyes, blood and swords, but she could not imagine what was like to be in a battlefield for hours, seeing your swore men die to save your life. Leaving their loved ones behind just for the sake of their lord liege. They had sworn, they were meant to do that, but seeing it was different.
"You should sleep, Antea" said Robb after some time in silent. Antea frowned a bit.
"Only if you don't need me anymore" she said getting up walking towards him, that took a breath.
"I need you to rest" he said, turning from her.
"Robb" she called; he had never turned his back at her "I'll go if you need to stay alone, but do not shut me out" Antea said feeling her eyes watering "Not you".
She saw her brother's shoulders lose the tension as his head bent down and a few tears fell from his cheeks. Before she could stop herself, Antea run to him, hugging her brother from behind. She was proud of him; he was so strong, their men had faith in him, he had won a battle and taken the Kingslayer captive. If he needed to cry, she would have hold him as long as he needed.
"I'm here" she whispered as she felt her brother's hand closing around one of hers.
They stood like that for some time, Antea wasn't sure for how long, but at some point, she had insisted for him to lay down and sleep. Grey Wind moved next to his owner and set down putting his snout over Robb's thighs. Antea smiled at her brother as she moved to walk out of the tent, calling Shadow so that her pup would come with her.
"They need to sleep, girl" she said stroking her black fur.
Dawn wasn't that far. Maybe two or three hours, but they were all awake, too shaken up by the victory. The men were laughing and talking, others were passed out on the ground, while others were getting their injuries checked. She smiled when she saw Lady Meage, heir to the Bear Islands, and lord Rosemberg, Cyel's Uncle, bowing their heads at her as she walked by. Then her gaze fixed on her Mother and Uncle talking some feet away from her. She was so relieved to see him unharmed. Then she moved her gaze to where she knew they were keeping the Kingslayer. She felt tempt of going there. Antea didn't know what she would have done, just the sight of the man made her sick and furious. There was no one else in the world that she wished dead more than that man.
"My lady should be asleep by now" she turned to see Theon Greyjoy walking towards her. She observed him as he walked. The bruise on his cheek was getting darker, but aside from that he seemed to be fine.
"And you should lay down" she answered as he got closer.
"You don't have to go there" Theon said seriously moving his head to point at the Kingslayer.
"Are you giving me orders, now?" Antea asked crossing her arms over her chest.
"I could never. You wouldn't listen" he said taking a breath "And I'm not a Stark, so it's you who could give me orders" Antea glared at him, with a little smile.
"Because you would listen?" she asked, making him shrug his shoulders.
"With the right words, from the right person" Antea rolled her eyes at his words.
"You are so cheeky" she said moving to walk away, but he stopped her by the arm.
"You always think of me as a joke" he said with a little frown as she felt surprised by his words "Why's that?"
"I do not" Antea answered "But you've bedded more women than I know, I know you're quite famous among them" she used a bitter tone than she intended to.
"It is different" he said seriously, like the time he had knew about her wanting an arrangement.
"How is it different?" Antea asked with a frown "You like women and flirting with them" Theon observed her for a moment, his hand still on her forearm, not gripping her hard so that she couldn't move and Antea had realized that she had not moved away only when he stepped back.
"You're right" he said bitterly before walking away from her.
"Theon" she called but he ignored her. Antea observed him not understanding. They couldn't talk anymore. Every time they did it, they ended up fighting. She hadn't even told him how glad she was that he was alive and well. It was like the both of them managed to say the wrong thing every time. It pained her, she liked his company and she hated not being able to talk with him properly.
"Let's go, Shadow" she said looking at her direwolf "We need to sleep."
