There wasn't an answer. Kagome knocked again and this time Rin's little black head stuck out the door. Her face lit up with childish glee at the sight of Kagome. She was wearing overalls again, but these had paint smears all over them instead of butterflies and flowers. They looked homemade too. Judging by the brush and pallet in her head as well as the blue streak over her left eye brow Rin was painting at the moment. Rin invited her in happily before she jetted off to the bathroom to wash her hands.

On her way there, ever the proper hostess, she said, "There is punch in the fridge if you want some! I made it today!"

Kagome's eyes brightened. She hadn't had 'punch' in awhile mainly because college spoiled the image of it with all those stupid people who spiked it. Kagome's mom used to make it all the time. The fun thing about punch is that the name is a general term for a mixture of juices. Kagome's favorite was pomegranate cranberry with seltzer to give it a kick. Kagome found a glass without much trouble as she was now an expert explorer scavenging around in Sesshoumaru's wayward kitchen cabinets. She peeked in the refrigerator and there it was beaming in the interior. The clear container stuck out among the nearly empty, white fridge because its contents were a striking red orange. Kagome was pleasantly surprised to find it a tropical type juice. It tasted like lemonade with strawberry and pineapple, but there was something else she couldn't quite make out. She'd have to ask Rin when she came back.

The apartment was quiet except for the sink running across the way on the other side of the living room. Kagome leaned against the sink sipping her drink. Sesshoumaru obviously was at work otherwise he would have come out at Rin's squeal from the front door of 'Kagome-chan!' Did he leave her alone on a Sunday? Kagome jumped out of her thoughts when coldness touched her back. She turned her head and scowled at the damp line running across her shirt. She gave the evil eye to the remaining droplets dripping down the ledge of the sink. Kagome left for the living in a huff. She ran her hand over the wet spot in a vain attempt at drying it faster.

Kagome sat down on the couch catching sight of Rin running out of the bathroom.

"I'm going to change really quick, okay Kagome-chan?"

"Okay Rin-chan."

Rin beamed at the friendly suffix obviously feeling special at that moment. Kagome sighed pensively. Rin smiled often now. Kagome noticed that on each occasion she was witness to it, the girl's smile became truer. It was more and more reflected in her eyes, seemingly in her heart as well. Kagome was proud of this accomplishment. It wasn't much, but enough to please Kagome who believed in the simple pleasures of life. Rin wasn't as hard as Sesshoumaru to crack, but it hadn't been easy because Kagome had to be extra careful. Pushing too fast could make Rin recoil from her and then she'd never even have a chance of gaining the little girl's trust. That wasn't acceptable.

Rin was such a beautiful child and not just on the outside. It was too true that she was completely and totally adorable in all aspects. Her heart was pure too. She found happiness at the tiniest things and you couldn't not notice it because the joy leaked from Rin's very pores it was so strong. It was just a shame that she didn't have a loving family like Kagome did. Rin of course has one now, whether her arrogant father wanted to admit it or not, but it wasn't always the same. Knowing your biological parents and having a bond with them is important. Those two, whoever they were, had no idea what they were missing out on.

Rin bolted back into the room, huffing and puffing. Kagome laughed and without thinking pulled Rin into a hug from her seat on the couch. Her quick actions were instantly regretted when Rin stiffened. All of her muscles tight with anxiety. Kagome was mentally kicking herself. Sure Rin had accepted her hug before, but that was because she was lonely. That wouldn't account for all the time. Kagome felt responsible for ruining the light atmosphere of the room. You could practically see the rain cloud hovering over her head.

"I'm sorry Rin-chan."

Kagome was about to pull away when two little hands hooked onto her shoulders. Rin gripped at the material of her shirt and clung to the older woman. Rin buried her face into the collar and nodded her head 'no.'

"It's okay Kagome-chan."

Kagome's motherly instincts, ones she was barely aware of, kicked in and she wrapped her arms once again around the small bundle holding onto her. Rin turned her legs to the side and sat on Kagome's lap. Kagome stroked her hair soothingly and resting her head against Rin's shoulder.

"You deserve the world Rin." Kagome spoke softly.

Rin shifted back and gasped at the seriousness of Kagome's normally easy going face. Kagome was light hearted and tended to joke a lot when she was around Rin. This was to keep from stepping on toes and time bombs from the past. It was strange for Rin to see her so serious. Kagome reached up a hand and folded the fingers inwards. She stroked Rin's cheeks with the back of her knuckles slowly and carefully. Her eyes were dark, but not in a negative way. There was love circulating so clearly in the depths of those pools that Rin couldn't look away. There was also a familiarity that Rin saw there. The pain of a dark secret hidden so far away that it's hard to notice it's there at all.

Kagome was very similar to Rin. Their kindness of heart was well known to all, but also that happiness was a cloak to shroud their past shames and aches. These facts were screamed out to Rin in that one moment and she wanted to pull away, but the sheer poignancy stirred within her a greater fear. Rin wanted to run and forget that her parents abandoned her, but even more so she didn't want to lose possibly the only person other than Sesshoumaru that understood how she truly felt. So she clung to Kagome with all her might wishing from the furthest sector of her heart that this wasn't all a dream. Kagome was kind, intelligent, beautiful, and just like the mother she'd always imagined. This thought made the trance on Rin crack and even as tears formed at the corners of her eyes she pulled away.

"No Kagome-chan, I deserve none of this."

Rin turned away bitterly. It was too good to be true. It couldn't be real. This would be just like her dreams and she'd wake up in a blanket on the floor shivering from the cold. Her clothes would be tattered and her only company would be the starving tom cat lying in the alleyway across from her. She'd draw it over and scoop it up. Then she'd hold onto it for warmth in a beneficial agreement for it and her.

Kagome frowned and hooked a finger under Rin's chin. Her skin was wet and Kagome knew she was crying. Rin refused to turn and Kagome bowed her head.

"Rin look at me…please?"

Kagome's voice wavered slightly. This must be how Sango felt after her break up with Inuyasha. Kagome now tasted her own medicine. It was sour and left her feeling empty. Kagome stared at the back of Rin's hair. The curve of her small ear stuck out of the tresses that the girl hadn't bothered to put it in a pony tail again. She shuddered a little, Rin's shoulder shaking. Kagome knew what it was. Rin needed her, but was so afraid Kagome would leave her that she turned away before it could happen.

Kagome touched Rin's hair drawing her fingers through it and detangling what knots were in it. She hooked an arm around Rin's waist again and molded herself around the girl. Rin took in a wobbly breath, but didn't struggle. Rin kissed the back of Rin's shoulder softly.

"I won't leave you Rin." Kagome tenderly whispered into her hair.

Rin shook her head, "Yes you will, don't make a promise you can't keep."

"I won't Rin…because you're a part of my heart. I can't live without it nor can I replace it."

Rin trembled in her grasp. The girl went silent and Kagome realized, from experience, that she was crying. Rin cried silently like she did. The only way to tell was the heavy breathing and the movement of her shoulders. Kagome tightened her grip on the girl and Rin didn't resist. She did put a hand on Kagome's arm though and in a subtle gesture accepted the warmth of Kagome's embrace like she once did to the alley cat of her past. In this case however, more than warmth was being transferred.

"Rin would you like to go on a picnic with me?"

Rin straightened and tipped her head to the side in thought.

"Okay." She replied in a tiny voice.

It was a voice that broke Kagome's heart.

"I was going to invite Sesshoumaru, but he doesn't seem to be here…"

"He's here."

"He is?"

"In his office, but you shouldn't disturb him."

"Oh? Well, if he's working I'm sure he'll want a break."

Kagome picked up Rin, not really wanting to disengage their contact yet, and moved to stand. Rin tugged oh her sleeve urgently.

"No Kagome-chan!"

Kagome paused at the warning in her tone. She frowned.

"We should go without him."

Rin noticed that Kagome seemed unconvinced and nearly sighed at the woman's stubbornness. This was one of the reasons she probably got under her stepfather's skin, but right now it wasn't going to work. It would get Kagome in trouble and Rin didn't want that.

"I'll explain later…"

Rin's eyes darted out to the hallway leading down to Sesshoumaru's office and room with nervousness. This was the dark time of the year for Sesshoumaru. This was the only way he knew how to mourn and Rin understood. She respected that and didn't disturb him. When she first came here it was strange and she entered unknowingly. He hadn't hurt her, but violently frightened her. She wasn't speaking then, but he did explain his reaction loosely. Sesshoumaru was always vague on the subject, but Rin knew enough that it was the anniversary of his mother's death and not to visit him. Usually it was only the one day, but this time there was a weekend before the day which allowed him more room. Sesshoumaru was always stern the day before and after. Most likely people thought it was normal and that it was just his dislike for such a ridiculous holiday. Rin knew different, but Kagome didn't know at all.

"Come on Kagome-chan."

"Okay…" Kagome said hesitantly.

She was two steps from walking in there, but Rin seemed to know something she didn't. Was he not in a good mood or something? Sesshoumaru was usually annoying or hard to deal with, but he could be absolutely beastly when he was in a bad mood. His voice would get this steely tone and his eyes were always narrower. It was on occasions like that, that Kagome was tempted to put a sign on him that said 'Co-workers beware!' She would too, but the joke wouldn't have been appreciated in the least and put her in the shit with his moody temper.

"Can we invite Kohaku-kun too?"

"Sure and Sango of course, maybe Shippou as well, though I thought he had a club meeting or something."

"Oh that's right! It was with the go club."

"Go club?"

"Yup. He's been taking lessons from Kaede. He's a natural apparently."

"Do you like to play go too?"

"I prefer shogi personally. I play with Otou-san all the time."

"Did you ever win?"

"Once!"

"Is he really good then?"

Rin nodded her head enthusiastically making Kagome laugh.

"Well I guess we should go to my place and give Sango a call, but knowing her she's working clay at the shop."

"Clay! Wow…I didn't know that." Rin said in wonder.

"Yeah, you've been to the Chikujitsu right? She made most of the pottery sold in there."

Rin's eyes widened, "She's really, really good!"

"I'm sure she'll be glad to hear that. Why don't you grab a sweater or something in case you get cold?"

Rin nodded as she ran back to her room and Kagome bent over to pick up her shoes.

…An Hour Later…

The weather was nice for once. Low humidity and a small chance of rain made this particular afternoon an enjoyable opportunity for a picnic in the park. The wind blew a nice cooling breeze so the attending group had gathered some nearby rocks to hold down the blankets. There were two in all and on the last two corners it was necessary to use some of the extra water bottles on the corners of the blankets. Rocks weren't exactly plentiful it would seem. Probably it was the fear that running and playing children would trip, step, or fall on them.

Sango was currently dishing out the sandwiches they'd picked up from Subway, too busy to actually make them. It was too last minute anyways and there was a place not five minutes from Sesshoumaru's apartment. Kagome had suggested it and when you could get some good deals when it came to buying five or six sandwiches. Kagome was in charge of napkins and Rin took care of drinks while Kohaku had been setting up the blankets. He'd needed some help when a blustering wind had stolen one blanket, but a laughing Rin had assisted by chasing after said escapee.

Shippou was late, but he said he had a few things to polish up on an article he was writing for the school newspaper before he would come over. Rin had coerced him into agreement about writing a few paragraphs on the science departments events for the upcoming month of March. The department was attempting to draw new members by holding some activities related to science. An example is the environmental club that would be remodeling the school's court yard by replanting and rearranging the sparse pieces of furniture therein contained.

When he did arrive Shippou found two blankets set up. One was littered with bags of chips, two plastic containers, and cups. In the containers, there appeared to be one with pickles and the other with potato salad that Sango happened to have off hand, which was strange. Shippou knew this because 'Sango' was written clearly on the lid in bold permanent marker. Shippou gingerly placed his parcel on that same blanket, which was a chocolate pie specially ordered by a, no doubt, drooling Kagome. A yell was heard from some direction generally behind him and before Shippou could turn around he was wrapped in a crushing hug.

"Shippou!" Kagome spoke in a fake, school girl squeal, "Glad you could make it." She said in a more normal voice.

Kagome kissed his cheek and returned his smile before he took off for Kohaku. The two went for the swings and though they invited Rin along she wanted to stay behind. Sango sat down on the blanket surrounded by food and picked up a pickle to crunch on. Her head whipped to Kagome and she gave a victorious smile while shielding something behind her back.

"I've waited so long for the perfect time to try this out!"

Out from behind her a brand new mp3 player was brought into view. It wasn't an ipod. They were too expensive, but it looked like a good runner up in quality. It was green, Sango's favorite color, and small enough to fit easily into her jean pocket. Kagome ogled it for a moment while Sango grabbed the headphones, the kind that stick in your ears, from her the small backpack she'd also brought along with her.

Kagome would admit it. This was the perfect time to ask Rin about what had happened back at her apartment because Sango was infamously known for listening to music very loudly. Kagome smiled. Even at this moment she could hear the singer from the American band 'Unsung Zeros' singing in a high falsetto through the headphones. Kagome moved over onto the empty blanket next to Rin. She was picking at a bag of sour cream and onion chips watching the two boys swing from a distance.

"So Rin…"

"It happens every year." She said softly not glancing over once.

"Why? Is it the same time each year?"

"Yes…I don't know much…and you shouldn't speak of it to anyone."

"No- I wouldn't. It's not even my business to know, really."

"You have a right to know. You're dating my otou-san."

"But he's dated other people, I know for sure."

Rin nodded, "But none like you."

Kagome frowned, "What do you mean?" She said trying to keep her irritation away.

"Sesshou-san could stay with you…be happy with you."

Kagome was stunned into silence. She really hadn't considered or even thought much about where this tentative 'relationship' was going. She was so preoccupied by other things like the epidemic and Shi. Kagome bit her lip, focusing on it for once. Without her notice Sesshoumaru had become the person she depended on to be there for her. He wouldn't overly sympathize with her or delude her into false securities that 'everything would be okay' and all happily ever after. Kagome loved Sango to death, but the girl could be too much like a mother at times. Kagome knew Sango couldn't help it and that it was just an instinct to want to protect those she loved, but it could be stifling at times.

Kagome needed blunt truth and Sesshoumaru was the one to give it. Kagome smiled. He really was a pain, but there were times when he was bearable enough to be considered a good thing in her life. That night where she walked in the rain, Kagome had witnessed a new side to him and it was one she found contentment with. That side of Sesshoumaru was always present; it was just buried under a lot of crap. Kagome giggled a little. She had a mental picture of herself wearing overalls, a yellow hardhat, and carrying a shovel with the intent to uncover the real Takarashi Sesshoumaru. There were dirt lines across her cheeks like a football player and a patch that said 'born to be stubborn' on the front of her overalls.

Kagome sobered seeing Rin looking at her with one eye brow lifted. It was very Sesshoumaru and Kagome pointed it out. At this observation Rin visibly blushed. It was obvious the girl viewed her father as an almost unreachable idol that she persevered to be more like everyday. Well except for the fact that the girl preferred English and history over science and engineering.

"What's really going on?" Kagome asked seriously.

Rin turned towards her and sat Indian style. Kagome's face was once again leaking with emotion. Her worry was subtle, but it was her compassion that brightened her face into one of true beauty that no makeup could create. Rin smiled for she was getting used to seeing it, perhaps with luck she could be blessed enough to always see it.

"His mother committed suicide on Valentine's Day."

Kagome stilled her face becoming pallid. She didn't say anything or move an inch. It was just too horrible. To lose someone you love on the day for love was unthinkable. Of course Kagome wasn't exactly one for the holiday because the people you love should know it all year not just one day.

"This is his time for mourning." Rin spoke quietly.

"That's not all is it?"

Rin gulped, "I had thought maybe this year it would be different because he was acting light hearted in the approaching weeks."

"What was the difference from previous years?"

"You." Rin looked up completely serious, "Normally he shuts himself away for that day alone, but with the weekend before it his mind isn't busied by work."

Kagome had little to respond to that. It couldn't have just been her. This probably happened awhile ago because Inuyasha spoke of Sesshoumaru's mother only once. He said she'd past away before he ever met her, but that his father had never loved her. Inuyasha's mother was basically the 'other' woman and Inuyasha was conceived on the side, but his parents were very in love. So says Inuyasha the idiot who barely accepts the emotion exists.

"Maybe he's just acknowledging it now and is moving on beyond the grief?"

"That's what I first thought, but I entered his office and it's all the same." Rin smiled sadly.

She accepted him in every way even when Sesshoumaru was in his darkest times it would seem. Rin was worried and it hurt her to see him in such a state. Rin had some things in common with Sango too. Kagome felt guilty for putting Sango through everything she did, but at some points Kagome had lost herself and really didn't know what was going on. She was so self-absorbed that she couldn't see Sango's tears. Was Sesshoumaru the same way? Could he not see how this was hurting his little girl? Kagome sighed. Sesshoumaru and she were much more alike than they'd both like to admit.

Kagome reached over the tucked a rebellious strand of hair back behind Rin's ear, "What else?"

"He acts so different…he scares me…" Rin sniffled, "he's never hurt me…but…"

"He's not your Sesshoumaru-san."

Rin nodded. Kagome settled an arm around Rin's thin shoulders. Kagome could feel an old emotion stirring in her belly. She knew what she had to do, but felt like she needed Rin's permission. Kagome didn't really because Sesshoumaru was a grown up and so was she, most of the time, but Rin was the one who was closest to him. If Kagome wanted to intervene than Rin should at least know about it.

"Rin I'm going to talk to him, okay? I can relate sort of…and it's not healthy for him to carry on like this."

Rin pulled away. Her brown eyes narrowed, but in sadness not anger. Kagome could see her hesitance and was expecting her resistance before she even spoke.

"But…"

Kagome put a finger to Rin's lips silencing whatever words she wanted to speak.

"I know from experience…that…he'll only get worse. He's not healing. Every year the wound reopens! That's no way to live!"

Kagome quieted herself immediately at the slight fear in Rin's eyes. Rin wasn't exactly scared, just startled. It was like Kagome's eyes had morphed into portals mirroring her very soul and not that part she'd want others to see. Kagome's face gave away everything she was feeling on most occasions, but for just a few seconds Rin had seen the true Kagome. It wasn't happiness and the carefree attitude she carried herself with, but a dark true sadness and depression. It was no doubt what the woman meant when she said that she knew through experience what it was like for Sesshoumaru right now. It was for this reason alone that Rin decided to burden Kagome with this and allow the woman to reach him. Rin had tried and failed, but perhaps Kagome would have just a bit more leverage in the situation. Kagome would always be able to touch just a tad more of his soul because Kagome wasn't blood or a relative, but his lover. That was the difference in everything, but that didn't mean Rin would give up and not try.

"I trust you."

Kagome met Rin's gaze and they came to an understanding. This wouldn't be an individual effort, but a combination of two. Kagome nodded and smiled. The tension lifted and the two relaxed in their newfound truce. Both lay back on the blankets hoping for success and a lighter future free of all the shadowed secrets. May the sun come out and whisk away the nightmares with its dazzling fingers. May the real Sesshoumaru's heart be released of its sorrow long enough to see the two who cared for him now before he loses them to his depressed inner self much like how a mother lost her son years ago.

…Tell me what you thought of this. I will hopefully have next chapter out in a few days. People are coming to fix my internet on Thursday so it might not be until after that…