Chronicle 4
Title: Yoruichis and
Komamuras
Characters: Yoruichi,
Komamura, Soi Fong, Nemu and Mayuri
Pairings: YoruichixSoi
Fong (one-sidedness), YoruichixKomamura (crack'd)
"Soul Society changed a lot since I left, eh Soi Fong?"
"Hai, Yoruichi-san. But my feelings are the same..." Soi Fong responded meekly. Her cheeks with delightfully flushed.
"Oh...? What are you talking about? You mean with that little ninja down the street? Hah! I knew you liked him Soi Fong!" Yoruichi laughed.
"NO! I mean...no that's not it."
"Sure, we'll talk about it later...still I wish Urahara could come back. Sure he's hunted like a wild animal, and he has his shop and those kids to look after, but heck he could manage to visit me."
"Yoruichi-san..."
"Oh I remember how we were kids, Urahara and I. We were inseparable, one look and you could tell that were close. Soi Fong, are you listening?"
Soi Fong stared at the ground and fiddled with her braid. Darn it, she thought. She couldn't lose her beloved flash goddess of a thousand steps.
"Yoruichi-san, I have to go somewhere for a while," she paused. "Will you wait for me at least later? I think I want to give you something."
Yoruichi smiled and nodded. "As long as it's milk, I'll be fine."
Soi Fong ran off with her hands close to her heart. She knew a way to make Yoruichi hers, and with luck, Urahara can die in oblivion while they skipped in the sakura tree meadows. Yoruichi-sama...
"What is it Soi Fong-taichou? This better be quick; I have an operation to do."
"Mayuri-taichou. I'm requesting an item from you."
"What item of mine?"
"I need you to make me a...love...potion," she blushed and looked to the side to see Nemu staring at her at the side of the room. Weird girl she was.
"I'm sure I could make it with my caliber...but it will cost you, you know. Nothing will come out of me if I don't receive something in return, oh say a specimen of sorts." His smile widened with his eye bulging menacingly. Soi Fong looked to the floor and sighed.
"What kind of specimen do you want?"
"Oh lets see, I could always get those ryoka brats, but they're a hassle to reach in the material world. The quincys are too boring nowadays and the hollows are ancient history. Ah I know, recently I had a day off Soi Fong-taichou, and do you know what happened?"
"You played Go," Nemu whispered at the side of the room.
"Shut up Nemu." Mayuri threw a chair at her. "I wasn't talking to you; I was talking to this captain. Yes, well I was playing Go and do you know who I played it with? I played with that Komamura. And do you know what happened?" He pulled out his long finger. Seriously, he should get that thing looking normally.
"You..."
"I lost dammit!" That Komamura, I thought I could at least win once, or twice, but no! He beat me every time. So Soi Fong, I need him to be my specimen. He'll make a fine fox...wolf...animal experiment and this will be my revenge!" Insert maniacal laugher here.
"You will make me the potion if I can get him?"
"Sure why not."
"Milk-flavored possibly?"
"Why not."
Soi Fong nodded fiercely and ran out the door. Mayuri grinned as she ran away and cranked his neck to look at his vice-captain. "Putrid thing you are, I should take you apart shouldn't I?"
"..."
"Komamura-taichou."
"Soi Fong, what are you doing here?" The...fox thing replied. Really, what is he?
"I think there's something you should look at. We found something that you should go see."
"I'm honestly busy right now, so please ask me later." He turned away from the woman and began writing on his papers.
"But Komamura...fetch!"
Soi Fong pulled out the Woman Shinigami Association flying saucer 2006, with glow in the dark bunny stickers and easily accessible make-up storage. "Um, fetch captain!"
"Woof!" o.o Soi Fong through the disk and it twirled in the mid-air. Komamura bit it and ran back to Soi Fong, panting and barking strangely.
"So, you are some kind of dog right? But you look like a fox...but Kenpachi calls you a wolf. Ah, whatever." She threw the disk again and again, getting closer to 12th division headquarters.
"Now!" Soi Fong threw her daggers at the poor doggy captain and pinned him down against a tree. She put a treat in his mouth and scratched her head. "Stay here."
"Woof?"
"Mayuri-taichou, here's what you wanted. He's pinned up against that tree."
"Excellent, Nemu, bring him in. And in return, I have the potion for you. Here's how it works. You must maker your lover drink the potion while looking at you. Simple, no?"
"Simple and I can't wait!"
"Who's the man, captain? That little ninja from down the street?"
Soi Fong grunted and swiped the from the creepy hand. "No, someone much better."
Mayuri laughed and turned around. He pointed at Nemu with a long fingernail. "Bring my pet in!"
"But sir, he's fighting it."
"Do as I say filthy maggot!"
"Hai, daddy."
"What did I say about calling me that, woman! I said you should only call me, the superior father of science or at least supreme emperor of Soul Society and beyond. Idiotic woman!"
Komamura head butted Nemu and ran off to chase Soi Fong. Nemu sighed as Mayuri bonked her on the head with a calibrated cylinder. (Science-nerd!)
"Here Yoruichi-san. Milk!"
"Soi Fong, this looks delicious. I think I'll try some right now. Oh, is this the 12th divsion emblem on the bottle?"
"Uh no! I mean, it's clean, I promise. I...made sure, just for you."
"Thanks." She looked at the contents and swished the contents. Seemed harmless. She opened her mouth and began to sip with her eyes closed.
"That's it, drink it all..." Soi Fong murmured. She heard the little woof out of a bush. "Komamura?"
The big bodied captain jumped out of the bush and pounced on Soi Fong, licking her on the face.
"Hey you, stupid! Ah!"
"Komamura-taichou?" Yoruichi stopped drinking and stared at the two captains.
"Ah Yoruichi!"
"Komamura-taichou?" She took two steps forward. "You smell nice today."
Smelled...nice? Soi Fong looked up at Komamura. He seemed to be back to normal. This was horrible, Soi Fong thought. So frickin horrible in every way possible. Yoruichi jumped on Komamura's back and licked his neck hair, purring.
"Yoruichi-san! Don't Yoruichi! That's filthy!"
Komamura glared at Soi Fong. She took a step back and gritted her teeth. "Komamura-taichou, there's an explanation to this. That well, whole incident with the dish and the daggers and the Mayuri and the Yoruichi glomp. Please, get her back to normal..."
Komamura stared at Yoruichi who was rubbing her head on his ear and lifted her up by the collar.
"Yoruichi seems very important to you, doesn't she?"
"Yes, captain, she is, so please give her here so I could get her healed."
Komamura pondered for a second before shaking his head. "Soi Fong, revenge is a sweet thing."
"Like milk!" cried Yoruichi.
"Best served cold," continued Komamura-taichou. "I think I'll keep her until I feel like you've learned your lesson. Right Yoruichi...kitten?"
"KITTEN!" Soi Fong yelled. She nearly had a heart attack. "No way! You, what you! Komamura!"
Komamura smiled and winked, his eye golden. It tortured the Mobile Corps Commander. He placed Yoruichi on his shoulder and walked away, grinning.
"Morning, Kenpachi, Yachiru-chan."
"Ohayou, Yoru-chan! Nice ride!" Yachiru squealed.
