A/N: The longest chapter I have written so far. One of the guys I work with called these stories "Brokeback Hogwarts." My story is a tribute to those who still have a somewhat pure mind. If you want to read about guys really getting it on you should read the story by the Tasmanian Princess, it's a good one. This is not a story about keeping the pimp-hand strong, this is about emotions, I think…
Last Chapter: Harry and Goyle have a shared vision, Hermione tutors Goyle on her own and she's now the only one who knows they both like each other.
The air was gentle during the moonlit night; there was only a slight breeze cascading over the parapets of Hogwarts Castle. A waxing moon was still rising to it's zenith in the starlit sky above as Harry Potter was plotting his star chart. The students were retracing the steps of the stars, picking up where they had left off at the end of their fifth year. Harry was originally having a hard time concentrating on his work, worrying about what Hermione might say to Goyle. Eventually his work took precedence over his thoughts as he needed to concentrate to properly fill in the chart.
As Harry plotted the position of Gemini on his star chart, a more interesting conversation was taking place in the Library below. Goyle's eyes were wide at having heard Hermione's last question. Hermione thought his eyes were going to burst out of his head from the strain. As realization slowly dawned on the large boy, his eyes narrowed to a normal size. This was a reaction similar to what Hermione had been going for. She now knew the truth, but she needed Goyle to admit it to her.
"Wha… wha… whaddayamean?" Goyle managed to stutter out eventually as the initial shock passed over him. "He… he… me… wha…?" Goyle was completely flabbergasted, stuttering as though he had never spoken before in his life. Hermione hadn't meant to shock him that much, but she was well intentioned.
"Gregory, I heard you when you said you liked him." Hermione explained, even though she knew full well that he knew that she knew. "Why does it seem so odd? And stuttering does not really answer my question. What would you think if Harry liked you as well?" Hermione was starting to lose her patience a little. This was not supposed to be this hard she thought. Why are these boys acting like the world is coming to an end?
"Granger, why would you say that?" Goyle accused Hermione quietly. "Harry and I are… were…" Goyle left his sentence unfinished. In truth he didn't know what to say, he had no idea where he stood with Harry. Goyle did know that Harry made him feel things that no one else had ever made him feel. When they touched Goyle felt something in the core of his body, but he didn't know what it was. This situation was confusing him and his wasn't sure if he wanted to share with the girl sitting across from him. He had said that he liked Harry, but he wasn't sure what he'd meant by it. His brow furrowed as he began to think.
Hermione felt shocked as Goyle accused her of saying something as though he hadn't said that he liked Harry. She watched carefully as Goyle thought about everything that seemed to have happened during that week. They had only been back for a week and this sequence of events was unfolding rather fast. She knew what she had to do, but these boys were making an easy job into incredibly hard work. She wished they would stop thinking and just go with their feelings. Then she stopped, as it dawned on her exactly what they might be feeling.
These two might have feelings for one another, but that would mean that they were homosexual. The idea didn't exactly have the same appeal it had once before. Hermione was certain that she would support their relationship; if they ever stopped being thick headed and had one. She did not know if she could speak for anyone else on that note. Harry was like a brother to her, and as long as Harry was happy, Hermione would be happy and happy for him. This wasn't about her though this was about the two boys she was now trying to get together. This was definitely a delicate situation.
Goyle spoke, startling Hermione out of her epiphany. "Even if he does, what does it matter? I mean, we could never… no one would allow it. Granger this isn't… uhm… you know, normal?" Goyle seemed confused and scared. Feelings that he didn't want to show, but had nothing else to bring to the table. Hermione felt a great wave a pity for the young man at that moment. She walked around the table and gave him a hug.
"It only has to matter to you." She said comforting him. After their brief emotional moment, Hermione went back to her seat and they returned to their studying. They talked a little more about Harry, and though Goyle was worried about the entire situation, Hermione assured him that everything would be fine.
When the Library closed that night, Hermione bade Goyle goodnight and made her way to the Gryffindor tower. She came across Peeves who was busy whooping through the corridors throwing chalk at her. She hit him with a defensive jinx that sent him flying. After that she wasn't interrupted again during her traverse to the tower. When she came to the Fat Lady she saw the portrait opening up for Harry. She followed him into the Common room.
"Well?" he asked her as he rubbed his hands in front of the fire. There were a few other Gryffindors sitting in the Common room, so Hermione had to sit closer to Harry for privacy. Essentially cuddling on the couch, Hermione relayed to Harry the conversation she had with Goyle. Telling Harry that Goyle was just as afraid of what their liking each other might mean. This would not stop them from feeling the way they did though.
"What are we supposed to do about it?" Harry asked Hermione impatiently. "Keep a secret from everyone else? You know I wouldn't like doing that to Ron. He'll find out sooner or later anyway…" Harry was imploring her for an answer. Hermione considered what he had said. Trying to weigh the options he had before him. Hermione had the distinct impression that these boys were more helpless than she originally thought but she was aware that this was a very delicate situation.
"Well, to be honest, I think you should do what feels right. You might have to keep it a secret, but you can tell Ron eventually, however, I think he should get used to the idea of you and Gregory just being friends first." She finally spelled it out for him. "Ron might not react in the friendliest way if he somehow randomly found out that his best friend was, well, 'dating another bloke' right under his nose." Hermione added this last part, doing her best impersonation of Ron. Harry laughed at her humor, and then realized what she had said.
"What do you mean dating?" Harry had never thought of it like that. More to the fact, he had never really thought about anything like that at all. He was realizing that, yes, he did like Gregory Goyle, but he'd never put it into words like dating. This was a new idea for him. Harry thought about it for a moment and realized that he actually liked that idea, but it wasn't something he wanted to tell the entire world. It seemed like something private, that he wanted to keep to himself.
Hermione knew that Harry was letting the idea of the entire situation sink into his head. After a few minutes of rapt silence, she told him goodnight. "Get some rest to-night Harry. You have a long day ahead of you tomorrow… Quidditch try-outs." With his inner turmoil, Harry had completely forgotten about the try-outs that were being held tomorrow. After Hermione had left, Harry tried to piece together a plan for the next day. A lot of students were probably going to show up and it wasn't going to be easy to handpick a great team. Katie Bell had already stoutly refused to be his assistant team captain, saying that she wanted to get back on the team by pure talent alone.
At around eleven Harry finally went to bed. He wasn't sure which situation perplexed him more. With Goyle there was a feeling of happiness that spread through his entire body; this happiness came with an uncertainty though. With Quidditch there was a feeling of dread at having to single out the best players, Harry didn't want to be mean but he did want to win the Quidditch Cup. When Harry finally fell asleep his dreams were swimming with brooms, jewels and Goyle's smile.
The next afternoon shortly after lunch, Harry was joined by Neville Longbottem and Hermione who wanted to watch the try-outs from the stands. As they made their way down to the Pitch Harry noticed a group of girls standing around giggling furiously. As they watched him approach their giggling grew louder and louder until Harry finally yelled at them.
"If you're not going to take this serious then LEAVE NOW!" Harry bellowed at the girls, who immediately erupted in a massive giggle-fit as they walked back towards the castle.
Harry was surprised that the try-outs were going as well as they were. Cormac McLaggen kept trying to tell Harry how to hold the try-outs until Ginny threw a quaffle at his head knocking him out and sending him to the Hospital Wing. When asked why she threw it, she simply said that McLaggen had been trying out for keeper. No one told Madam Pomfrey that McLaggen hadn't been at the hoops when she threw it.
At the end of the try-outs Harry had a full team. While they weren't the team he was used to playing with from the year before, except for a few of them, he was reasonably pleased with whom he had flying with him. Harry told them that he would give them the practice schedule no later than breakfast on Monday morning. He still had to work out the details for scheduling the Pitch with Professor McGonagall.
By the time Harry was cleaned up and back inside Hogwarts it was time for dinner. He was so overjoyed with having had a reasonably fun time that afternoon that he hadn't thought about Goyle since before lunch. When Harry saw Goyle sitting down at the Slytherin table, a warm feeling of happiness seemed to rush through his body. Hermione had told Harry that Goyle had admitted to liking him. Harry wanted very badly to talk with Goyle, but had to be patient.
Harry joined Ron and Hermione at the Gryffindor table for what would become a very pleasant, though uneventful dinner. Ron was ecstatic at having actually beaten every other candidate for Keeper. Hermione was very glad as well. It was the first time in a few days they had all sat down for a peaceful meal. Harry was very glad that things seemed to be similar to how they had been in their early years at Hogwarts. Harry was aware that all things changed with time, but he liked having nice dinners with his friends. In his reverie of all things nice, Harry's eyes wandered around the Great Hall until they met with Goyle's.
Goyle smiled at Harry who smiled right back. Harry nodded his head toward the doors of the Great Hall and Goyle nodded understanding. Excusing himself, Harry left his friends at the table and went to meet Goyle.
Once in the entrance hall, Harry and Goyle decided to go for a walk outside. It was still a little light outside and as long as they stayed on the grounds they were allowed outside. They walked for a short distance before saying anything. The cool night air was refreshing and the cricket's song was even somewhat soothing. When they were close to the lake Harry finally spoke, looking Goyle in the eyes.
"Hermione told me…" His voice trailed off. His stomach felt tight and his mind kept going blank. Harry didn't know what else to say, he knew that Hermione wouldn't lie, but what if she was wrong. A voice in the back of his mind told him to be brave. For some reason, he listened, scared, but he continued on. "She told me what you said, and what she said about me is true. I do like you." Harry looked away briefly, but Goyle put his hand on Harry's chin, returning Harry's gaze to his eyes.
"I like you too." Goyle said timidly. "I don't know why, but I do." Goyle let his hand drop from Harry's chin. They stared into one another's eyes for several minutes. Then Harry boldly took Goyle by the hand and led him over to a tree by the lake. They had a few hours before they had to return to the castle, and Harry wanted to talk.
They sat by the tree, still holding hands, and they talked. Harry told Goyle how the try-outs had gone, how funny the look on McLaggen's face was when he was hit in the head with a quaffle by Ginny Weasley. Goyle laughed at this, he didn't seem to like McLaggen much either. For awhile they sat there under a tree by the lake in the moonlit night talking. Their fears about one another were gone, but the fear of what their relationship might mean for their friends was lingering in the back of their minds. For the time being, they silently agreed that they would talk about that later, they wanted to enjoy their first night together without worries.
When the clock tower rang out nine, Harry knew that it was time to be heading back into the school. When he went to stand, Goyle held him still for a moment. Harry looked into the other boy's eyes and saw happiness there. For several long moments, they looked into one another's eyes. Harry could feel the butterflies dancing in his stomach as they came closer together. He could feel the warmth emanating off of Goyle's large, chubby body. Goyle wrapped his arms around Harry's back as their lips slowly touched. Harry responded to Goyle's lips by opening his mouth a little, and though they didn't venture their tongues into the other's mouth, this was a passionate, open mouthed kiss. Harry placed his hands on the back of Goyle's head as the kiss deepened. As slowly as they began, their lips parted. Looking deeply into Goyle's eyes, Harry smiled.
They stood up and walked back toward the castle, holding hands until they were close to the great doors at the entrance. Once inside they said goodnight with a hug and went to their dormitories. They had both had a most wonderful night.
Harry hurried up to Gryffindor tower where he saw Hermione sitting on their favorite couch, knitting what looked like another hat. Harry had hoped she would have given up on S.P.E.W. but apparently she hadn't. Crookshanks was curled up at her feet, staring lazily at the woolen yarn. She smiled at Harry when he approached and noticed that her friend was beaming.
"Well, you're very happy this evening!" Hermione was happy that he was happy. "Did you manage to work everything out? I noticed someone leaving the Great Hall just before you." Hermione said without pausing in her knitting. Harry sat down with her and told her what had happened that night. He told her how they talked and shared their feelings for one another. He finally told her about their first kiss, and she grinned at hearing about it. "See, what did I tell you?" She said matter-of-factly in a very Hermione-ish way.
"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, it doesn't end there. We've decided to keep it a secret for awhile. I mean, it's still so early in the year and Ron hasn't exactly made friends with him yet. I can't bear to keep a secret like this from Ron, but what else can I do?" Harry seemed a little sad about this, but what otherwise happy. Hermione concluded that they could deal with Ron later and they should focus on each other first and foremost.
Harry had never been in a relationship before, and definitely not a secret relationship. Hermione, who didn't have any experience in that area either, resorted to tactics taken from her books. She told him that their behavior would change around each other a little, either shying away from each other, or becoming too touchy-feely. She warned Harry that neither would be healthy if they wished to keep their relationship a secret. She concluded that Harry aught to discuss this aspect in particular with his significant other before they returned to class on Monday. They had classes together without her and she warned him that while she supported them, she wasn't going to 'keep their relationship together' for them. That was something that they needed to work out on their own.
At hearing her say the word relationship Harry nearly jumped out of his seat for joy. Hermione noticed this and shook her head. Boys are so fickle, she thought to herself, laughing out loud at Harry, who in turn began to laugh at himself as well. So this was the new Harry? Hermione thought. She liked the new Harry over the brooding, worried-about-Voldemort Harry. Sure, this was a rapid change of pace for her as well, but change wasn't always a bad thing.
Ron came down from the boy's dormitory, still beaming at having made Keeper. He had brought his Wizard Chess set down with him, hoping that Harry would be up for a game. During the first game, Ron beat Harry by setting up a clever trap that unfolded nicely when Ron's Knight chopped Harry's King in half. Upon seeing the morbid display from the chess pieces and being in very good spirits, they both laughed for several minutes as they gathered the pieces for another game.
Hermione never paused in her knitting, noticing that even though Harry was keeping a very large secret from his best friend, they were still, the very best of friends. Hermione was a little worried at what might happen when Ron found out about Harry's secret relationship, but as she and Harry had agreed, they would cross that bridge when they came to it.
