Fiona closed up shop and walked to the bus stop. It was eight at night, her feet were killing her, she sat on the bench and wrote in her journal.
Just got off work, feeling exhausted, I doubt I'll see Anon tonight. I'm just too tired, he really doest seem to like me very much anyway. I want to fix the relationship with him but how can I when he doesn't seem to really be putting in any effort?
Fiona sighed and rubbed her face with a hand in frustration, she didn't feel comfortable with this, letting herself be this vulnerable, especially when her therapist was planning to read it. She brought her pen to the top corner to cross it out but hesitated. She sighed and put the pen back into her purse, along with the journal. She brought her gaze back up and waited patiently for the bus.
The bus came to a stop and she got out and walked a few blocks to her apartment complex. She lived in the human side of town, she took the elevator to the fourth floor and walked out.
"RENT!"
Fiona flinched, it was her landlord Mr. Ditkovich. She turned to an open door and forced a smile, "hi."
"Hi? What's can I spend it?"
"I have a paycheck due this week and-"
"You're a month late again."
"I'm sorry but all I have is this 20 and-"
He snatched it away. "Sorry I doesn't pay the rent. And don't try to sneak passed me, I have ears like a cat, and eyes like a rodent." He then slammed the door on her.
She walked to her room fiddling with her keys. She finally got it and unlocked her door and walked inside. She dropped her purse to the floor, let her hair down and went to the bathroom. She took a few moments to get her colored contacts out and then got in the shower, she got out and made dinner and took out a book. Her dinner was done and she went and got it from the microwave and sat on the couch eating. Then tossed it out and got into bed to get ready for the next day.
She got up and took her antidepressants and ate a bagel before getting dressed up as Julia and looked at herself in the mirror. Well, let's go 'n git this over with."She said in her thick country accent and headed out.
She got to the office and walked inside smiling at her therapist. "Howdy doc."
"Julia good to see you, how are your antidepressants treating you?"
"Perfect, ah'm as happy as a peach."
"Good, may I see your journal?"
"A'course!" She fished it out of her purse and handed it over. The therapist skimmed it over. Julia, who is this anon you always talk about? He's been brought up a lot for almost a month now."
"Oh ya know, just a special friend, a maun, nothin too special maund ya."
"Right, but what's his name?"
Julia stared at him a moment. "Ah ain't so sure that's your business doc."
"I see. Julia, can I ask you something?"
"Only if, ah can ignore it."
"Who are you really?"
"S'cuse me?"
"Who Are you?"
"Ah'm Juli-"
"Cut the crap Julia, you won't be able to ever heal if you don't learn to trust people. I promise that no matter who you are, I won't judge you. It'll be one hundred percent confidential. But you have to make yourself vulnerable in order to start TRULY healing."
Julias ear flicked at this nervously, inside she was having a panic attack, but on the outside she was calm and collected, besides the nervous ear tick.
"Ah'm gonna say this once more doc-"
"Julia please-"
"An' ah wont you ta listen-"
"You cant heal unless-"
"An' listen good ya bastard, AH. AM. JULIA!" She yelled digging her fingers into the chair in anger as she glared at him.
"No youre not. It's only the persona you use to hide your true self."
"Ah don't need ta take this shit from you." She said and stood and walked to the door.
"Julia please, no amount of antidepressants will help you heal, it'll only mask the problem, please, I want to help you but in order to do that you NEED to trust me!"
She stopped at the door looking at it, hesitating, her throat got tight and she bit back tears. They soon started rolling down her cheek. "I don't know if I can….."
A hand was placed gently on her shoulder, "you just took the first step." She turned to him showing him her face, her makeup wasn't running because she had water resistant makeup.
She noticed his calm smile and a handkerchief held out to her, she smiled and took it, wiping her tears and bowing her nose. "Thank you."
"Of course", he led her back to her chair where she sat down nervously.
"So, why don't you start by telling me you're real name miss Julia."
She rubbed her arm nervously. She took a deep breath and let it out, calming her nerves. "I'm Fiona Fox."
He smiled, "now we're getting somewhere."
