DISCLAIMER: HG Characters do not belong to me.
A/N: Just wanted to let some of the reviewers know who said they felt Katniss's character changed because she is older, that's what I was going for. I am trying to write a more mature Katniss and Gale.
Chapter 70-Hurt
When Gale opens his eyes the next morning he instinctively reaches his arm out to touch Katniss. However, he feels nothing beside him, only the sheets of the bed. Her alarm hasn't gone off so he knows she hasn't woken. He abruptly sits up and sees no one in the room.
"Katniss?" he calls out. He hears no answer and hears only silence. He immediately gets out of bed and looks in the bathroom and the living room/kitchen area. He sees her bag is gone. He wonders if it is possible that she left really early and he slept through it. He goes back into her bedroom and washes his face, trying to clear his head. If she did leave early, he is not surprised that she didn't wake him up to say goodbye. He is fed up with her behavior, not understanding what he did to make her distance herself from him yet again.
He gets dressed and just before heading into her living room he sees the note on the nightstand. He sees it has his name on it. He quickly opens it and begins reading:
Gale,
Hopefully by the time you read this I will be gone. I need to go away for a while to figure things out. It's not that your love isn't enough, it's that I am too unstable to love you the way I should, the way I know I can. I distanced myself from you because when I am with you, I am not myself. I am too broken right now. I thought I didn't need anyone's help after being attacked and assaulted by Geffen's men, but I do need help. But I don't want the Capitol's help or anyone else's help in Panem. I think you know whose help I need. Please don't follow me, I need to do this on my own. I know you are worried, but you know I can defend myself. Losing River made me realize, I am not ready, I am not ready to move forward like I thought I was. Being busy with teaching distracted me, but losing someone I grew an attachment to made me become more aware of my real issues. I don't want you to think for one second you did anything wrong, you didn't. Haymitch told me once during the games I never deserved someone like Peeta, that he was too good for me. Haymitch was right. But I deserve you even less. When I used to think about how you moved on and found other girls to love, that you had forgotten about me, I think it was my way of telling myself that I didn't deserve you.
I don't know what my future holds with PES, I hope they let me finish when I return, but if they don't, I guess it wasn't meant to be.
Love,
Katniss
He folds the letter up and puts it in his bag. He goes out into the kitchen and uses her phone to call Alexia, asking her to look up a phone number for him. Once he writes the number down he gets off the phone with Alexia and dials.
"Hello?" he hears a woman say in a groggy voice.
"Is this Jocelyn?"
"Yes-who's this?"
"This is Gale Hawthorne, I don't know if you remember me, but I am Katniss's friend from District 2. We met at her going away party last year."
"Oh yes, I remember."
"Is she there? Did she come to your house?"
"No-I haven't seen her."
"If she shows, please call me right away. It is impossible to stop Katniss when she sets her mind on something, but she cannot go into the wild territory. It is too dangerous."
He begins explaining to her why. Once he is finished she takes down his number along with his work number and says she will call if Katniss shows up.
He calls the President's office after and is able to arrange a hovercraft pick up, but he needs to go to the main town. As he is about to head out he hears the phone ring. He picks up on the second ring.
"Hello?" he says with all hope that it is Katniss on the line.
"Uh-hi-is this Gale?"
"It is" he says in a surprised manner that someone knows it is him.
"Hi, my name is McKenna Greenleaf, I am one of the teacher's here at the school. Katniss is my student. Is she there? Class is about to start and she hasn't shown up yet. It is very unlike her not to be here by now."
"Katniss won't be showing up today."
"Is she sick?"
"No, she's-she's gone."
"Gone?"
"She's-not well. She had to go away." He doesn't want to say too much because he has no idea if this woman knows about Katniss's time in the wild territory.
"Well, your girlfriend needs an attitude adjustment. She was quite the bitch yesterday."
A part of him is relieved to know that he was not the only who experienced Katniss's mood swings yesterday, but a part of him was angry at this woman's choice of words about the woman he loves.
"Do you talk to your students with that mouth?"
She laughs and says "No students here yet. Seriously though, is Katniss alright?"
"No, and I don't know when she will be back."
"Alright, I will tell PES she is out sick and next week is break. But if she is not back by the following Monday, she may be dismissed."
"I will pass the message along."
He hangs up after saying a brief goodbye and heads over the train station. He wants to just head to the wild territory, but he has no weapons and he knows he needs to get to the Capitol as soon as possible. He hopes Katniss is more aware of her surroundings than usual, and that she uses her distress watch if an emergency happens.
After leaving her apartment, Katniss puts the letters in the outgoing mailbox and heads to the train station. She takes the train heading to the town Jocelyn lives in, but she has no plans to stop by her house. She knows that is the first place Gale will look for her. She tries to sleep on the train, but only gets an hour of sleep at most. When she arrives in the village, she somehow manages to find a taxi, figuring the taxi was around to drive people home who were too drunk to drive at the nearby bar she sees. She takes the taxi to Jocelyn's house, asking to be dropped off away from the house. After the taxi is out of sight she quickly walks past Jocelyn's house and to the fence, slipping through as easily as she did back in 12, relieved that it is nighttime. Once through she begins jogging into the woods, trying to get as far away from Panem as she can. She jogs and walks as much as she can until she is too exhausted to go on any longer. By the time that happens dawn approaches, she is able to find a water source and climbs a tree, strapping herself to it. She closes her eyes and quickly falls asleep, her dreamcatcher around her neck.
She wakes up four hours later. She is still tired, but is able to get up and start moving again. After another 2 hours on foot she shoots a bird out of the sky, her first meal of the day. She continues on, taking breaks when she needs to and even getting a quick nap in to refresh her energy. That evening after eating a squirrel she climbs into another tree and stares at the sky filled with stars. Once she falls asleep she dreams of Prim that night. She hasn't dreamt of Prim in a long, long time. While the dream was not a nightmare, it was not in any sense of the word a good dream.
She is back in District 12, back in her old home. It is reaping day, the day she volunteers for Prim. She is fixing Prim's hair and inspecting her outfit making sure she has tucked in her shirt in the back. She sees that Prim as a very sad look on her face.
"What's the matter little duck?"
"You don't sing anymore, why not?"
"I don't know" Katniss says pondering Prim's words.
"You should sing again."
"Maybe I can-someday."
"I think Gale would like it if you did."
"You do?
"Yeah. Something else is making me sad though."
"Tell me, I can't stand to see you so sad."
"Bad things happen today" Prim says in a tone that reflects the look on her face.
"They do, but you end up safe. I always said I would protect you."
"But I can't protect you."
"From what?"
"From what is about to happen."
Katniss jolts herself awake. She is breathing heavily and forces herself to calm down, reminding herself where she is and that it is just a dream. She takes her water bottle out and drinks some before going back to sleep. The next morning, she hears the birds in the trees surrounding her. She looks around and relaxes in the moment, happy to be back in the forest. Suddenly, she sees all the birds and bugs scatter from the trees, quickly moving away.
She knows what it means. She furiously packs away her stuff and climbs down the tree, losing her balance and falling the last 3 feet, landing on her side. She brushes off the pain as she gets up and begins running as fast as she can. She starts to hear the sound of the hovercraft approaching, knowing that most likely Gale is on the aircraft. She runs in the opposite direction of the noise, continuing to sprint as fast as she can. She runs so fast she doesn't realize she's running right off of a small cliff, falling down into a tree and landing inside the tree's thick bushes before falling to the ground. She passes out from the impact.
When she awakens, she is in extreme pain. She sees her backpack off to the side, her bow bent with her arrows scattered everywhere. She cannot move as she lies face down on the ground. She cannot activate her distress watch because she put it in her bag the night before, not liking to wear it when she sleeps.
She wonders if this is the end. If it is, it was definitely not something she saw in her visions. She knows if an animal comes, she is done for. She closes her eyes and sleeps, thinking if she is going to die, might as well die while not conscious.
She is not sure how long she sleeps, but later on she feels herself being moved, she screams out in pain, her eyes squeezing shut instinctively. She feels herself being moved onto a stretcher and being pulled away. She looks up and only sees the light peaking from the trees above her. She hears someone say "Just what my day needed, to stumble upon another person. How many of you are up here now anyway?"
She does not respond, not sure if the person she hears is talking to her or themselves. She closes her eyes as she continues to be pulled away, fearful of the unknown while trying to ignore the intense pain she feels in what she realizes is her arm.
