A/N: OK. So I got realllllly sappy and a tad overly dramatic here. Oh well. I can't control what comes out when I start something like this. It just is what it is.

You can take it or leave it. Whatever you choose. Whatever you do I hope - as always - that you enjoy it. (: There'll probably be a 10th chapter - an epilogue of sorts.

I like nice, round even numbers. ;)

Tonight it struck me that every idea I have essentially destroys the whole concept of The Office as we know it. Jim and Pam move on…the rest of them get left in the dust.

I guess the reason I write is because it's what we'll never see.

OK - enough babbling. Let me let you read already. (:

Chapter Nine

"It was really…" Pam sighs as she reaches across the table and links her fingers with his. "I don't know - just…awkward. And you know for sure he accused me of cheating on him with you for years. That's the first place his mind would go."

Jim fights to keep his mind on her words. He can tell she's upset about running into Roy today in the parking lot.

"He said all these mean, hateful things to me and if it had been four months ago I'd have broken down and cried. But as I stood there I just kept thinking…this is why. This is why he wasn't right for you. No one who claims they love you should ever speak to you like that."

"No. Of course not." He says then.

She realizes though he's right across the table from her he's a million miles away. "Jim?"

"Huh?"

"You're not even paying attention to me." She says it with concern rather than accusation. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing." He lies. He smiles slightly and gives her hand a squeeze. "So tell me more about Dwight."

"Don't do that." She shakes her head and pulls her hand away.

He sighs and leans back in his chair. "Do what?"

"Change the subject. I know now for sure you're not listening. I'm in the middle of telling you Roy stood in the parking lot and called me a two-timing whore in front of most of the office and you're asking me about Dwight."

Jim blinks and begins to focus. His blood starts pumping furiously through his veins. "Did he really say that to you?"

She gives him a look. "Pretty much."

"If he was here right now…" Jim begins, his voice shaking with rage.

"You'd what? Beat the crap out of him? That's productive..." Pam rolls her eyes. "…not to mention unlikely."

"I'm not going to let him talk to you that way…" Jim promises her.

"I'd love to see you accomplish that. What will you do? Rip out his tongue?" Her eyes are lit with annoyance. She takes a deep breath and tries again. "Jim, I don't care what he says about me." She says softly.

Jim's eyes widen at her words. He bites his lip and lets out a breath. "Yeah? Well too bad. I do."

"OK. Are we really going to do this? Let him ruin our evening?" She asks him then. They sit in silence as the busboy comes over to clear their salads. Pam leans closer and speaks in a hushed tone. "Because I didn't come all the way up here to waste time arguing about someone who doesn't matter."

"I can't believe this isn't bothering you." Jim says incredulously as he wipes his mouth with his napkin.

"Did I say that?" Pam blows out a breath and plays with the stem of her wineglass. "It bothers me - but not enough to get all riled up about it. He's moved on and wants to act like a twelve year old. I've moved on and want to act like an adult. Do I like him making a spectacle of himself in the parking lot? No. I don't." Her eyes brim with tears as she stares at him. "I hate it. I hate being the center of attention if you haven't noticed that already. And as much as he made me just that today at the office - "She tilts her head to side to side, cringing when she sees the people at the next table turn away as if they weren't eavesdropping. "…you're doing the same thing right now in this restaurant."

He realizes she's right. He inhales deeply trying to calm himself down. "You're right. I'm sorry."

"You should be." She says her voice still laced with annoyance. She smiles as the waiter places down her entrée. When he moves away she picks her fork up and gazes over at Jim, her eyes icy. "Mind telling me what's going on now?"

"It can wait." He says sadly as he moves his pasta around his plate. His appetite has completely disappeared.

She stares at him thoughtfully, her eyes filling up. "I forget…" She whispers with a shake of her head.

"What?" He asks, not understanding.

She bites her lip and blinks furiously to keep the tears from spilling over. "That as well as I know you I don't know everything. I'm still trying to figure out your moods." Her eyes roam over him and she notices for the first time tonight that he looks exhausted. His shoulders are hunched and there are circles under his eyes. "This isn't about Roy."

"No. Not really." Jim admits as he puts his fork down. It's useless. He's not going to be able to eat a bite.

"It's…something else." Panic fills her as she swallows audibly. "Did I do something?"

His eyes lock with hers. "If you really want to piss me off you'll keep that up." He says, his voice dangerously soft.

Pam's eyes fly open in shock. She's not used to hearing him talk like this. "What?"

"Blaming yourself for everything - jumping to the conclusion that it must be something you did immediately." He throws down his napkin. "I can't stand it when you do that. I can't stand him for doing that to you."

This is not how she wanted tonight to go. They have so little time together she hates that they've spent this whole night arguing. She says the first thing she can think of to make it right.

"I'm sorry." She says as she hangs her head.

It was not the right thing to say. Jim's still incredibly irritated. "And it's even worse when you do that. Apologize for speaking your mind." He sighs as he gets the waiter's attention and asks for a check. Neither of them speaks as the busboy rushes to pack their dinners to go.

When he places the bag in front of Jim he looks over at Pam. She looks so...hurt and he knows he's the reason. He can kick himself for ruining their evening.

He takes a deep breath, knowing this is not going to be easy. He reaches for her hand and rubs his finger over her palm gently. "Pam. I'm sorry. It's not you. It's the opposite - actually…"

She searches his face for an answer but she's still incredibly confused.

He reaches for his wallet and throws a few bills on the table. "I'll tell you. Let's…just not do it here."

"OK." She nods as she lets him lead her out to the car.

xoxoxoxoxo

She thinks that he'll start talking when they get back to his apartment. But - he doesn't. Instead as soon as they get inside he pushes her up against the door and presses his lips to hers desperately.

Pam is confused, and a little afraid. She doesn't know why she expected it to be simple now that they were together but she honestly did. Something's wrong. The words keep repeating in the back of her mind even as she finds herself responding to him.

Her hands move to loosen his tie, her fingers fumble over the buttons of his shirt. She pushes the fabric off his shoulders and then reaches for his belt.

He catches her hands in his and gathers her in his arms, half dragging her across the room and lowering her onto the couch. She knows now that something is terribly wrong because his eyes are closed. He's not looking at her. He always looks at her, especially at times like this. Suddenly, his hands are everywhere, gentle but possessive over her skin and her head falls back as he feasts on her throat. His lips move back to hers and it's then she can almost taste it. He's trying to tell her something. Something awful.

He's sick…is her first horrific thought. Not just sick - it must be bad. Oh God - maybe he's dying…she thinks next. She clutches him close as he moves over her, desperation hanging in the air around them. As he becomes still and buries his face in the crook of her neck she digs her nails into his shoulders, as if that will keep him there forever. Her mind screams out to whoever will listen. I just got him. I can't lose him already. Before she can stop herself she's actually sobbing.

It's then he finally notices she's nearly hysterical. He's surprised at her reaction and rushes to comfort her. "Hey." He whispers as he raises himself on his forearms. He shifts to lie next to her and gently pulls her close. "Hey…"

"You can't leave me." She finally manages as she reaches for him again. "You just can't."

He smoothes her hair off her face and looks deeply into her eyes. Even though he knows he's lying he hears himself say. "Hey. It's OK. I'm not going to leave you."

"Something's wrong." She shakes her head at him and fights to catch her breath. "Don't lie to me Jim. Something's really wrong I can tell."

He gazes down at her and notices for the first time that she still half dressed, and there's a tear at the hem of her skirt. He's horrified at the realization that he's just treated her incredibly carelessly. He takes a moment and looks at the state he's in himself and can't believe the way he's acted.

He stands up and straightens his clothes, becoming increasingly embarrassed in the process. She stares at him as he does, still not understanding what just happened here.

Quietly, she rises from the couch and moves to the bathroom, changing into the t-shirt he'd left hanging on the door and splashing cold water on her face.

A few minutes later she tentatively makes her way over to him.

"I don't want to disappoint you." Jim begins as he catches a glimpse of her out the corner of his eye.

"You couldn't." She shakes her head at him.

"I might." He says bitterly.

Pam realizes now she has jumped to conclusions. She's just so confused she doesn't know what to think. She remembers how she lost it a few minutes ago and she fights to explain herself. "Maybe I overreacted a little before. But you seemed so...lost and I was scared because you wouldn't talk to me. I still don't…get you - yet. Not completely. But I want to. So make me understand. Tell me what's going on." She whispers.

He extends his hand to her and she grabs it and holds on tight, coming to rest on the couch next to him.

It should be like a band aid. He thinks to himself. Just suck it up and rip it off quickly. "They want me to transfer back to Scranton." He says softly.

"What?" She looks at him with surprise.

"They told me today. They need someone to boost sales down there. They say I'm too good a salesman. Isn't that ironic?" He laughs bitterly as he brings her hand to his lips and kisses it quickly before letting her go. "I excel at something I can't stand doing."

"Then don't do it." She says simply. Is this all he was worried about? She thinks with a shake of her head. His reaction to something like that is ravaging her on the couch? If that's his way with dealing with things she's not going to complain but in retrospect it seems a little melodramatic.

Who are you calling melodramatic Pam? Like you thinking he was dying is a perfectly rational conclusion? She laughs softly to herself. God, we are some pair.

He doesn't understand what she's saying. He looks at her blankly.

"You don't have to transfer back to Scranton, Jim. Just don't go." She says with a shrug. "Quit."

"I can't…" He begins, but he can't finish his thought.

She wipes at her eyes and can't believe that he's been so tortured over something so trivial. "Can't what? Want something different? Want something more? Sure you can. As a matter of fact I think that's exactly what you should do."

He still can't believe he's heard her right. "You want me to quit my job?"

"If that's what will keep you from moving away the minute I get here. Yeah. I do." She says with a nod.

"Just like that?" He says then.

"Yeah. Just like that. Jim - let's face it. We both have the same horrible flaw." She pushes her hair out of her eyes as she gazes over at him. "We think way too much."

He finally smiles as an image of Michael fills his head. "Better than not thinking at all."

"True." She smiles back at him. "But I think it keeps us standing still sometimes when the best thing we could do is move."

What she's saying doesn't make sense and he rarely does things that don't make sense.

Still he finds himself thinking out loud. "I do have some money saved - but not much. That ticket to Australia cleaned out my bank account." He laughs as he moves closer to her. "See what happens when I act impulsively and don't stop to think?"

"OK. Point taken. Maybe we can find a happy medium." Pam replies. "I know for a fact that you can do anything you want to do Jim - anything you put your mind to. You do an amazing job at something you can't stand. Can you even imagine what it would be like if you did something you loved?"

She's slightly ashamed that she doesn't know the answer as she asks him. "What would you love to do?"

It only takes him seconds to answer her. "Kids." He says simply.

"Huh?"

"I like kids." He says then. He gives her a sideways glance. "In a completely appropriate, non-threatening, non-pedophilic way of course."

"Good to know - you had me worried for a second." She says with a laugh. "C'mon. Tell me more."

"I think…I'd like to work at a school - like, maybe teaching or maybe just coaching. I don't know. Or…like an after school program - you know - all those kids who's parents work and need a place to hang out. It'd be pretty cool."

"Then why don't you do that." Pam says as if it's already decided.

"Really?" He says then, still unconvinced.

She stands and moves over to him tilting her face up to his. "There's this guy I know? He always gives me the best advice."

"Really." He smirks at her.

"And to top it all off he's really cute." She says with a grin, getting lost in his eyes for a second. She shakes her head to focus. "Anyway, he's told me, on more than one occasion, that I have an amazing gift." She whispers as she leans into him.

"Oh yeah?" He replies, his eyebrows rising.

"Yeah. And then one day he told me I needed to take a chance on something sometime. That if I didn't I'd be a receptionist for the rest of my life." She continues.

"He sounds very wise." Jim says thoughtfully, his arms winding around her waist.

She kisses him quickly and gives him a look. "Now - being that I'm an exceptional receptionist…"

"No question." He interjects.

"…I kept thinking…how could I leave all the glamour behind? I mean, the…prestige. All those cringe worthy moments only Michael is capable of creating?"

"It's a lot to give up." He laughs as he looks at her face. She's trying to be so serious.

"It took me a while - but I finally listened to him." She says as she kisses him again.

"It was a tough sell." Jim says as he kisses her back.

"Ah yes. But even though you are the world's best salesman it doesn't mean that's what you have to do for the rest of your life." She giggles as his mouth moves towards her ear.

He nibbles gently at her neck before he pulls back to gaze into her eyes again. "You think we can survive? I mean, I don't know if I can keep you living in the manner you've become accustomed. We might have to live on grilled cheese sandwiches."

"Well that might not be so bad. You do make excellent ones." She says as a new idea sparks in her mind. "Hey. Maybe instead you can specialize in cuisine using imitation cheese. I mean think of the possibilities. What could be next? Exploring the glories of Cheez Whiz?"

He looks at her as if she's crazy. "Those were quality Kraft singles I'll have you know."

She can't help it. She starts laughing uncontrollably. "My apologies to the chef."

He tightens his hold and gives her a kiss that steals her breath. "I have the feeling you're going to be good for me Beesly." He says softly as he pulls away.

"Hmmm. That only seems fair, since I already know you're good for me." She replies as she lays her head on is his chest, never more content in her life. And just like that she figures it all out. She knows it really doesn't matter at all what either of them ends up doing.

It's just being together that counts.