A/N: Wheee! Plot digression time! This chapter is basically what I wrote this fic for. I know you're all dying to find out why everyone is gone. I'm sorry it's taking so long to get to the point. One of my next chapters will be almost all techno jargon, and that takes a while to write. So bear with me and I promise you'll find out why in the next 2 chapters.


Chapter 5: Gateboarding and Bungee (puddle) jumping

"You brought a SKATEBOARD to ATLANTIS!" Sheppard yelled, flabbergasted. Then, on the heels of that, "You know HOW to SKATEBOARD!"

"I didn't bring it to skateboard with; I brought it because it is an extremely useful tool for carting stuff around and making repairs under things. And yes, I learned in college." McKay said calmly, putting the finishing touches on the makeshift ramp. He had laid down a huge piece of metal—Lord knows where he found it, thought Sheppard— down the stairs with supports in the middle and another piece of metal going up the ramp to the gate.

"And this is what you've always wanted to do—to do a skateboard jump through the stargate," the Major asked incredulously.

"In a manner of speaking, yes. Not necessarily through the stargate, but I've always wanted to board through a ring or hoop."

Sheppard shook his head. "You never cease to amaze me, Rodney."

McKay straightened up. "Well, I am a man of many talents," he said proudly.

"That's not what I'm talking about."

Rodney scowled. "Look, just go and watch from the control room, or something." He waved his hand vaguely in the direction of the control room. Sheppard, fearing for his life, happily obliged. Being on the same planet as McKay with a skateboard was dangerous enough.

Sheppard watched from the control room with mixed horror and amusement. It would've been so damn funny to watch if he hadn't been concerned McKay was going to kill himself.

Rodney strapped on a military helmet, complete with night vision goggles, the works. This made the major wince. If President Hayes knew how the expensive military equipment was being treated right now…

McKay got on the skateboard and began rolling down the "ramp." Sheppard half considered dialing a gate address quickly, or putting up the shield, but decided against it. The last thing he needed was for Rodney to be sent to another planet or killed, leaving him in Atlantis alone.

Now McKay was going up the other end of the ramp. He went off the jump, through the deactivated stargate—

-and executed a perfect double grab while going through.

Sheppard's jaw dropped. McKay CAN skateboard! He seems like such an unathletic geek!

McKay emerged, holding the board under one arm. "Woohoo! That was awesome! Wanna try?"

-

After dismantling the ramp—Sheppard still didn't know where Rodney had gotten the sheets of metal, probably tore down a wall or something—the pair stood on the top stair of the gate room.

"So you're telling me you've never wanted to do something really stupid or dangerous just because it seems fun?" McKay asked, grinning. "I mean, you were an Air Force pilot!"

"Not in the way you mean, probably. Boarding through the gate. My God, McKay, if you're brave enough to do that-"

"That's different," McKay quickly replied. "But you've never had a strange desire to do something so insane you couldn't do it around anybody?"

"Nope," John said evenly.

"You're lying through your teeth. Now's the chance! No one's here! The world is your oyster!"

Is Rodney giving me a motivational speech? Sheppard thought, not believing what he was hearing from McKay, of all people.

"Now that you mention it…" Sheppard smiled.

McKay's grin quickly dropped off his face. "I'm not going to like this, am I?"

-


A/N: I wrote this before I saw 'The Defiant One,' in which McKay flies the jumper, but I wrote it after 'Hot Zone.' So just pretend that 'Hot Zone' came first for half a chapter.


"Now, Rodney, it's not that hard," Sheppard repeated for the millionth time.

"I can't do it! I've never flown the jumper before!" Rodney sputtered, trying his hardest to get out of it.

Sheppard groaned. "You can do it. You have the Ancient gene. Besides, you're not flying it. You're just making it hover."

"But-"

"Now all you have to do is stick you're hands there and there. Don't move them at all. Don't think about the ship moving. At all. Got it?"

"No! I can't-"

"Good." That shut McKay up tight.

John walked to the now open door in back of the puddlejumper. He clipped the elastic rope to the harness around his ankles. He was about to leap when McKay called out to him.

"This is more insane than skateboarding through the stargate! I know how to skateboard, I have experience. But have you ever been bungee jumping before?"

"No," Sheppard admitted. "But I've always wanted to. Like you said, the world is my oyster," he grinned.

"But I didn't mean-" It was too late. John had already jumped.

And he thought I was nuts for boarding through the gate! But bungee jumping out of the puddlejumper? McKay was tempted to look out and see Sheppard's jump, but he was afraid if he moved, he would crash the ship and kill them both.

-

Hmm. Maybe this was a stupid idea, thought Sheppard as he plummeted toward the water. Fast. Oh God, I hope the cord isn't too long.

Sheppard felt a huge jolt as his sudden stop pulled the jumper down. For a second, he was afraid he was going to pull the jumper down and he would hit the water. But he bounced back up a few more feet, then down again. He bobbled up and down a couple times before stopping about ten feet from the ocean. He hung upside-down by his ankles, waiting, gently swaying in the breeze.

"Uh, Rodney," he called. "You can pull me up any time now."


Yes, stupid chapter, but it was fun to write! Oh, and to senait: Bring it on! You are so going down!