DISCLAIMER: HG CHARACTERS DO NOT BELONG TO ME, BUT OC ONES DO
Chapter 158-The Letter III
October 14 (Wednesday Evening)
Avery picks up the letter Peeta handed her and re-reads it, her tears subsided, she reads her Mother's words more slowly:
Dear Peeta,
Happy Holidays. I hope you are doing well. I know it has been almost four years since I last wrote to you and I am sure you are surprised I am writing now. I hope Delly, Hunter, and Lily are well, please give them my best.
To give a quick update, Sienna and Avery are both continuing their education. Sienna is in medical school at the Capitol's University and Avery is in fashion school at the University in District 8, attending the same school as Gale's sister Posy. They are both doing well, but I miss them. Of course, as their Mother, I wish I would hear from them more often!
Jack and Juniper are keeping me busy. Jack recently started his final year of high school and Juniper is in grade 6 and they are both doing well also.
I have enclosed Jack and Juniper's school pictures for you, I sent the same pictures to Haymitch. As you can see, Juniper still resembles the Hawthorne's, but with Prim's eyes. And while she may look like a Hawthorne, she does not have the personality of one. She has the personality of my Father and Sister to the core. She is patient, has a level head, loves animals, and is extremely kind. Like Prim, she cannot hunt, refusing to hurt any animal.
As a Father, I'm sure you understand when I say that I love all of my children unconditionally, but with Juniper, I sometimes feel as if, the one person who I sacrificed everything for has come back to me in a way. I feel Prim's spirit in Juniper, it is hard to explain and I hope my words make sense. As the youngest, it was inevitable she was going to be spoiled, but we try not to go overboard but it is hard. I feel so fortunate to be able to spend so much time with her, given my circumstances.
Unfortunately, the news of my health is not good. For the last three years, I have been smoking herbal cigarettes and drinking herbs in liquid form, recommended by my Mother of course. I officially stopped my medical treatment in the Capitol. My t-cell levels have been declining and my immune system is getting weaker. But the herbs, kept me going for a lot longer than I anticipated, giving me more time to spend with my family. I am not sure if Haymitch told you, but I quit my job with PES three years ago to focus on my health and family. I volunteer in fundraising events in the Capitol, doing archery events-it keeps me busy and I enjoy it.
I am grateful for the extra time I have been given, but I feel my time will soon be running out. I have developed a cough that has been getting worse. The herbal cigarettes help, but only for a short while. I wanted to write you this letter, as my final goodbye. Yours is the first letter I am writing, for I know it will give me the courage to prepare for what I need to do next.
You and I have been through so much together, but I know with the return of your memories, that you know that I was always most grateful for the fact that you taught me that life can go on, no matter how bad our losses. You saved me in every way a person can be saved. You brought me back to life, and I never stopped being grateful for that. What you have taught me, I will now have to try to pass on to my children in my words and video message. To teach them that life can go on, without me, and that I will always be with them.
When you see the birds in District 12, I want you to think of me. Whether it be a mockingjay or a cardinal. When the bird sings, think of the times I sang. One thing that I learned living with the tribe, is that death is not the end of life, but the beginning of another journey for the spirit. When you see a bird, think of my spirit in that bird, and I hope it brings you a sense of comfort.
I have enclosed in this package a sketch book and paint set. Please paint a beautiful picture for me and keep on painting. I wish you nothing but happiness and please hold onto our good memories. We endured so much trauma and pain, and my heart breaks thinking of how you will be sad.
I ask one last favor of you, please do not tell Haymitch you received this letter. I know once I am gone, it will be so hard for my family and him. I do not want to upset them right now, and I am trying to continue as best I can in my regular routine. But I wanted to give you a proper goodbye since we are not in each other's lives anymore, because we have been through too much together, you deserved to hear from me the truth.
I raise my hand and give you the three fingered salute-
Katniss
Avery places the letter back down again and stands up and goes over to the large stained-glass window. She is crushed, for she never received any letter or video message from her Mother. Did her Mother never gain the courage to write or record her final goodbye? She sees the letter was sent to Peeta in December, a full eight months before her Mother passed away. Surely, she had gotten the courage in those eight months to write.
She wonders if her Father has the letters and was withholding them for some reason. It would be unlike him to do this, unless her Mother had told him not to give her and her siblings her letters and message until they were older.
Her anxiety rising, she quickly leaves Peeta's study and heads to the front door, not bothering to say goodbye.
March 6 (Saturday Morning)
Gale had woken up early, but continued to lie in his bed, staring up at the ceiling. His mind playing over the events of yesterday, he knows he needs to apologize to Cassandra, but his stubbornness prevents him from picking up the phone and calling her or sending a message. Eventually drifting off to sleep, he is awakened by the sound of his phone. He picks his phone up and sees it is another message from Cassandra. Placing the phone back down on the nightstand, he gets up and goes over to his dresser and pulls out Katniss's letter from inside the top drawer.
He opens her letter and sits back down on the bed, carefully re-reading the letter again:
Dear Gale,
I hope you have watched my video message before reading this letter, if not, please watch the message first. I hope you can understand why I choose to wait for you and the kids to receive these letters and messages. I trust that you will make sure that my Mom's letter and Haymitch's letter is sent. I only recorded messages for you, Sienna, Avery, Jack, and Juniper.
I hope the messages bring to all of you comfort and remembrance in the years ahead. When you feel sad or alone, just remember, I am with you, that I'll always be with you.
By the time you read this, you will have seen my fate, I can only hope, that whatever happened, I was in your arms. For there is nowhere else I would rather be.
I know the kids will be fine, because they have you, and the rest of the family. I worry about you, please remember what I said in the video message.
Thank you for giving me my fire back, and for being my best friend for the last 38 years, well 31 technically, but in my heart, it is 38.
And I want to thank you most of all, for gifting me with my greatest joy in life-Sienna, Avery, Jack, and Juniper. I did not think anything could fill the void in my heart after Prim, but as those most important to me have taught me, life can go on, no matter how bad our losses.
Never forget that.
So, until our Pod is reunited again, I'll be waiting, you know where.
Love Always and Forever,
Your Catnip
He breathes in deeply, his emotions running high. He realizes he must have overlooked Haymitch's letter in the pile. He walks over to the box and sees Haymitch's letter behind her Mother's at the bottom. He takes both Haymitch and Katniss's Mother letters out and places them on his dresser, reminding himself that he needs to get both letters in the mail as soon as possible with a note.
Thinking that he wants to give Sienna, Avery, and Jack their letters and messages as soon as possible, he realizes it is probably best if he shows it to them here at the house. Knowing Sienna will be not able to return to District 2 for a while, he is conflicted. He suddenly remembers a conversation Avery had with him last fall when she was in District 12. He remembers how she had called him and started asking him questions about Katniss and if she had left anything for them.
"I just wondered…did Mom…leave anything for us? A letter or a video message or anything? For all of us….you, me, Sienna, Jack and Juniper?" he recalls her asking him.
"No, nothing like that, why do you ask?"
"I just wondered" he remembers she had said in response then quickly changed the subject.
He now wonders if Peeta had gotten a letter, and if Katniss had told Peeta in her letter that she was going to be recording messages and writing letters to them. Thinking the only way Avery could have known was unless Peeta told her or shown her a letter from Katniss. Katniss had said she didn't record a video message for anyone else but them, and it makes him wonder what was written in Peeta's letter.
But he quickly expels the thoughts from his mind, for he thinks about Katniss's video to him, and the things she told him, things he knows she would never say to anyone else. And it comforts him, knowing that after 22 years of marriage and four children later, she did not fall out of love with him as she did with Peeta, if anything, their relationship had grown stronger.
He picks up his phone and calls Avery, when she answers, he asks if she can come to Silver Lake, explaining that he has something very important to show her.
A/N: you will get to see what Katniss says to Gale in her recorded message
