Disclamer: i dont own resident evil...if i did it would ba bloodier. :)
WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONARE RE: STYLE
(Scene opens and Regis Philbin walks to the stage. Crowd cheers)
Regis: ok freaks I'm in charge and you are the losers who sleep with your parents.
Stage man #1: MEANIE (cries) WHY WONT YOU BE FIRED.
Stage man #2: (whispers) yea……..
Regis:( takes out a gun and shoots #1) THAT'S WHY BITCH
(Crowd Gasps):OMG HE KILLED HIM!
Regis: It's a joke ok….. (mumbles) jackasses.
(Show begins)
Regis: Now Heres (flashes) WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONARE. Ok now introducing our contestants. Hes a blonde and has a medical condition called constipation. It's Leon Kennedy
(Crowd stares)
Leon: hi ladies (wink)
Guys in crowd: BOOOOOOO(throws rocks)
Leon: YOUR JUST JEALOUS.
Guys in crowd: SAY IT TO OUR FACES
Leon: (takes out rocket launcher) DIEEEEE (shoots backwards)
Stage man #2: NOOOOOOO (blows up)
Regis: (mumbles) one less moron to take care of. Ok Leon when did you find out you cant use the washroom.
Leon: SHUT UP (CRIES)
Regis: hahahahah babye
Leon: SHUT UP YOU GAY WHORE.
Regis: YOU BITCH (claps and leon is seated in a electrical chair) SAY THAT AGAIN AND ILL KILL YOU
Leon: (pees in pants) IT'S A MIRICAL (cries)
Regis: (whispers) pansie. Now our next contestant is a slut and actually slept with Jill Valentine….. CLAIRE REDFIELD
Claire: HI GUYS ( throws cards that say…FOR A GOOD TIME CALL CLAIRE AT 1-800-RENTASLUT.)
Regis: (grabs a card and pockets it) Ok settle down….
Guys: WHOOOOOO
Regis: SHUT UP (SHOOTS AIR)
Guys: ……..
Regis: ok Claire how do your comrades fell about you being a slut.
Claire: Oh them…. there ok I think ive slept with all of them except Brad he kept crying about still wanting his virginity.
Regis: ……..probably gay….Ok next he's the brother of a slut……HEY isn't he also your comrade……..
Claire: no…….
Regis: Oh ok…..he's the brother of a slut he's…………
(Window breaks and Albert Wesker jumps in)
Wesker: STEP ASIDE BITCH I'M THE NEW HOST.
Regis: IN YOUR DREAMS JONNY BRAVO
(crowd): OOOOOOOO
Wesker: WHAT….. THAT'S IT I WAS TRYING TO BE NICE BUT NOOOO
Claire/Leon: let the viewers choose if they want REGIS…….
(Regis side of the crowd cheers): YAY!
Claire/Leon: or…..WESKER
(WESKER SIDE OF THE CROWD CHEERS)
TO BE CONTINUED.
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