Warning: Getting into the adult.

There where a million ways to handle this, right now Liz mind wasn't going over them. No her mind seemed to be stuck, he been doing that a lot lately making her brain just stop. She hated the feeling, he hated him, and she loved him, she…

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Jason jumped.

Liz tried not to cry why every meeting between them had to be gut wrenching, emotion draining, and bullshit. Why did he have to affect her like this? All she had to do was laugh in his face and walk out. But it wasn't in her nature to hurt Jason Morgan no mater how much he hurt her. He'd just stood there and bared his soul a part of him she's wanted forever and she didn't know what to do.

Why couldn't he just fuck her and send her one her way? Why, why did he have to love her now? What was different about her now, she would take his bullshit? What?

"Elizabeth? Are you alright?"

"NO! Why would I be alright?"

"Elizabeth…"

"How do you expect me to take this information? Please tell me because I don't know. What am I suppose to do be happy, be angry, tell you go to hell or fall into your arms. I need to know."

"I can't tell you that Elizabeth you wanted me to honest I was, I'm sorry if…"

"If what Jason? Oh god, oh god, do you how long I've wanted this? To hear you bare your soul to me and end it with I love you a fucking life time." She said through gritted teeth.

"Elizabeth breathe calm down. I knew I shouldn't have said anything." He said moving to take her arms in his hands.

"Don't touch me, you know better." She said backing away.

The point to this meeting had come up again. It seemed in bearing his soul he'd forgotten. Jason breathed thinking on everything she said and came to a realization.

"I have to go."

"NO."

"What? What do you mean no?"

"I just realize something." He said looking at her.

"Oh yeah what?"

"You Elizabeth Webber are a fucking coward."

Liz slapped him.

"What do you want out of all of this Ms. Webber?" He acted as if he didn't feel it.

"What?"

"I'll tell you to be a normal happy woman who got everything she ever wanted. Here I am take me."

"What?"

"Elizabeth, stop playing stupid with me. You're not scared, people get pass scared you're a coward. Afraid of what they'll say. Because you had the balls go for what you want, but you didn't, you didn't have the balls did you? You let me do this to you because being lonely was safer then telling me how you really felt, because being at my side was just as good as being in my bed. Being my secretary was better then getting half."

"I own my own company." She stated half heartedly.

"Yeah but how long did that take what did it take. A kick in the ass, how many of those is it going to take Elizabeth? Before you stop being a cowa..."

She was trembling, no shaking, but she was kissing him. She pulled away and looked at him, blink back tears and fear and so many other things. Jason looked at her new determination in his voice.

"You're so scared. Of what Elizabeth, of him, of me? I'm right here I'm not going anywhere."

"Just leave me be." She wrapped her arms around herself, tears falling free now.

"STOP!" She jumped.

His blue eyes burned.

"NO more Elizabeth no more. We've done this, I'm tired, you're tired, let just get over this and move on. How much angst can person have in their life?"

"How am I just supposed to get passed being rapped? How am I supposed to not be a fucking Coward? What am I suppose to do? - Face red with tears. -Say what you want Jason, you make it sound so easy but it's not. Not for me, look around, it just me! ME! Yes I'm chicken; I chose the safe over the leap before you look. So do several billion other people sue me! But when you're alone, you don't take bigger chance contrary to YOUR belief. When your alone you don't leap, you look first you see the deep fucking plunge into the black. And you see that black you don't say fuck it, I'll take my chance, you back away and you say there has got to be a better way. When you're alone you don't take bigger chances you take less. I'm sorry if that makes me out to be a coward to you Jason Fucking Morgan we're not all Navy SEALS. We're just little girls who's family died when they where way to young. We're women who never had anyone but herself to depend on."

"Here I am! Here I am." He yelled.

-"o were where you then!" She yelled back.

"I doesn't mater anymore Elizabeth don't you get that. We can't change the past, we can only move one but you won't. You refuse."

"I don't know how, don't you get it, I don't know how. I don't refuse, I want more then anything, I want you, I want what you have to offer but, I just don't know how. How you get over being rapped besides concealing? How do you get over a broken heart when the one you want finally wants you how? How?"

She feel exhausted into his arms and cried, Jason picked her up and carried her to the pillows in front of his fire place. Pulling her small frame close to his massive body. He kisses her head and rubbed her back while she shook sobs, and whimpers. Jason sighed and deep breath that moved even her, he lifted her chin and kissed her, the kissed turned deeper and more passionate. Liz trembled in his arms nearly whimpering in protest but Jason didn't stop he ran his lips to her neck and then up to her ear.

"I'm here, no one but me." He whispered but she continued to tremble.

He pulled her had back sinking his fingers into deep black locks. Holding her had he force her red stained eyes to looked at him.

"I'm here, me not one but me." He said and lust filled husky voice.

He kissed her again; she returned the kiss holding on to his torso as he mover her head the way he wanted. Jason pulled back, and looked into her eye, taking off his shirt he stood and removed his boots and jeans and finally his boxers. Liz swallowed; naked he knelt down in front of her.

"Touch me Elizabeth." She waited for him to say more but he didn't.

Slim trembling finger reached for his chest and Jason when from semi hard to hard. So hard in fact it was painful but an ached like he hadn't felt in a long time. Her fingers made contact with his skin and Jason let out a breathe boarding on a groan. She ran her hand over his chest moving closer she concentrated on just toughing him and not the fear she felt deep inside. Jason closes his eyes head tilting to the side as she got closer his manhood. One soft fleeting swipe had Jason leaning forward, holding her arms for support. He open his eye, Liz saw the want and lust in them the heat that was burning him.

"I won't break, just touch me."

Liz swallows letting her touch become bolder, his skin was so soft, with old scars. Jason eyes close again and this time he moaned out loud. Soon he could feel her breath on his should as her hands ran over his ass, soon she was rubbing she squeezing flesh. For Jason this was a unique experience, he was never so open so vulnerable not even with Courtney. He took control soul perouse for her to wake up the next morning smiling. How cold and emotionless it all was considering right now. His face leaned into her palm, running his lips over it then kissing.

"My body isn't lying to you Elizabeth." He said softly

Now it was him trembling, her touch was getting more painful by the minute but he needed to relax to know that he was hers and no one else. When she touched his shaft again Jason gasped. Her hands where strong and soft at the same time, one hand ran over the tip while the other move to his balls.

"Jesus."

"Big."

He smiled eyes still close focusing on her touch. He licks his lips mouth suddenly dry when her hand began to pump him. Soon his hips where rocking in time with her movements. She pressed her lips to his neck and liked the lightly sheen, and a tanned skin. She bit him at the juncture, Jason damn near growled. Her grip tightened and Jason grabbed her shoulders for support, body on the very nail head then she took his mouth by force. With that Jason groaned, Liz went from base to tip with a tight strong pull Jason jerked twice, pulling form her mouth her cried out. He exploded while looking deep into her eyes, his body rocking against hers, he seed spilling into her hand, Liz continued to stroke him.

"Stop." It was a plea.

Liz did and looked at her hand; Jason was breathing hard and watching her. She licked her hand and looked down when she heard a slap. His shaft smacked against his belly and she watches her with lust filled eyes.

tbc