This is just a little oneshot thats been bogging my poor brain.

Paige knew she had fucked up, even though she was completely trashed to the point where the world was floating and everything seemed fizzy. She wanted it to stop, so she put her head to her knees and tried to sort out what had happened.

It had gone from one drink, and progressed steadily onward. It hadn't been her fault though, she needed some anesthetic for the hole in her heart.

They had forgotten her birthday. She had mentioned it too over the past weeks with a childish excitement, hoping that this birthday, her 23rd, might just be the best one she had ever had. Ever.

She vaguely remembered waking up that morning and bounding downstairs to find nothing but an empty house. Piper left a note saying she was at the club, and Phoebe was at the newspaper working on her column. Paige was left all alone, because she had quit the only thing going for her to be a full time witch. What a stupid deciscion that was, since it made her feel more illegitimate than ever.

She didn't let it get her down at first, and pampered herself with some Paige time. Independence that she had craved since getting roped into the witchy mess of her life. But as the hours ticked by, 1 o'clock, 2'oclock, 3'ocklock, 4'ocklock, and she had gotten not even a phone call from the girls that called her their baby sister, her heart started to ache. Yet there was still that flicker of hope deep down inside that Piper and Phoebe had an amazing suprise planned for the one special day she got a year.

Needless to say, it was shattered when Phoebe walked through the door, in an awful mood, and snapped at Paige for not running the errands she had been instructed to do. It was then Paige realized that nothing good came of hoping, and on the verge of breaking down in hysterics stomped up to her room and slammed the door, just to drown out Phoebe's yells of "That was mature, Paige, real mature."

She felt like a five year old having her sisters always bossing her around and telling her what was right and wrong. Of course, most five year olds got treated better by the people that supposedly cared about them, but anyway, tonight she would show her sisters. She would stay out all night if she wanted, and get piss drunk, even high, if she felt like it. There were always stoners around, she could join up with some of them. No more responsibilities, no more sisters.

It was anger, frustration, and and a hell of a lot of dissappointment that drove her out to put on the sluttiest outfit she owned-leather pants, and a top that was more of a bra than anything, and heavy eye makeup before orbing out of the manor, leaving little indication of where she went aside from the clothes she had shed.

She went to a club on the other side of town, the 'bad' side as dubbed by her stupid sisters, determined to redeem her birthday, or at least forget that it had ever even happened.

The bouncer didn't even check her ID, it was that sort of place where only the 'best-dressed' got in, as Paige strolled into the club and sidled onto a bar stool. It was barely a minute before Paige had an Apple Martini before her and had sucked its contents down in the feverish need of an addict.

This, made her a failure. She had gone sober on her twentieth birthday and dropped alchohol for good. No wine, no beer, no nothing. But three years exactly from that milestone in her life, she had regressed back to her teenage ways of partying until you weren't sure where you'd wake up tommorow.

Even though the adult in her told her to stop while she was ahead, she chugged down the drinks which were piling up in front of her due to the many male patrons of the club who appreciated her presence, if you know what I mean. It was easier to swallow the pain with a nice cold coke and rum than to face it.

Somewhere in her mind, a little voice bugged her that her sisters had alot on their minds. Phoebe was still mourning the loss of her marriage, and Piper was dealing with the fact that she was pregnant with a very magical baby. Paige got forgotten somewhere in the mix. The attention they had given her when they first met dissappated, and Paige became a nuisance. She knew Piper hated her, and learned not to expect much from her eldest sister. Piper was always putting her down, or comparing her to Prue, or telling her to do things. There were the moments of tenderness Piper showed Paige, but the fact that she could count them off on one hand didn't really say much for her.

Phoebe was a different story. She had accepted Paige, protected her from Piper's venom, and made Paige feel like she belonged somewhere, for the first time in 5 years or so. That was until she questioned Cole's goodness.Things went downhill from there. Of course she had been right when push came to shove, but she still knew deep down inside that Phoebe resented her for destroying her marriage and ruining her newlywed bliss.

She shuddered as she remebered Phoebe's harsh words, Piper's disbelief, and the way Cole had tortured her with the help of the power brokers. After all that went down, Paige had wanted nothing more to be held by her sisters and to be told that she was loved.

That actually would have been the best birthday gift of all.

She wondered if her sisters noticed that while they always, always, told each other they loved each other after every phone conversation, before leaving every morning, and before bed at night, they had never uttered those sacred three words to Paige, even though Paige had said it to them several times.

But then again, they never listened to her. She might as well have been invisible. How else could her 23rd birthday have been forgotten?

She chugged down more and more alchohol, until she couldn't even remember why she had been upset in the first place. She lost all reservations and hopped up onto the bar and began dancing rather provacatively.

There were no objections from anyone in the club and she lost herself in the moment.

That was until she had lost her footing and fell off the bar. Being drunk increased her klutziness by like a thousand percent.

The guy she had been gyrating against assumed someone had thrown her off the bar and threw a punch at the guy to his left. The guys girlfriend then proceeded to attack Paige becuase she thought it was Paige's boyfriend attacking her boyfriend.

Nobody noticed how violent things were getting. There wasn't a single person on the dance floor who was sober enough to care.

Paige had her lip split, her eye punched, and her hair pulled forcefully. She clawed the inflicter of these wounds and did much of the same. She was only shaken out of her stupor when a bouncer pulled her off the girl and held her back even though she fought. Paige tended to be an angry drunk.

Instead of being thrown out of the club and into the hands of the police who were making collections for the drunk tank at the San Francisco Jail, Paige was taken to the back where she was met with the concerned face of Justin Harper, who she vaguely remebered was Piper's old friend from school or something.

Paige had no idea he had run the club, but was too drunk to really take it into consideration. He sat her down on a couch in the room which was set up like an office, and took her cell phone away from her, even though she protested that she was fine, and phoned her eldest sister.

That brought her here. She sat up, her dizzy spell gone and studied Justin who was jabbering away to Piper. She didn't really focus on the conversation, but assumed her was telling Piper to come get her. That was just great for Paige and everything because Piper was the person Paige wanted to see most right now!

Justin placed a hand on Paige's shoulder and she looked up at him expectingly.

"Don't worry Paige" He told her reassuringly "Your big sister's on the way"

She responded by throwing up all over his shoes.

Piper shut her phone annoyed and threw it in her purse before throwing the bag over her shoulder. How could Paige be so irresponsible? Just leaving the house like after a 'minor argument' with Phoebe. Phoebe had said it was no big deal over the phone, but that showed how much she knew. Ten minutes later she was getting a call from her old best friend saying that her baby sister, who was supposedly home and safe in bed, had started a bar brawl and was completely and totally drunk at his club. He had done her a favor though, and not let the police throw Paige in jail. That would've been great.

She sighed as she started her car and began the 15 minute drive(if she sped) to her little sister's location. She didn't understand Paige. Hadn't her sister taken a vow of sobriety some time ago? What would make her break it now? Piper became increasingly worried as she navigated through the city streets. She had screwed up again and missed something big with one of her sisters. It was like a Phoebe/Cole fiasco all over again. Except now, she was pregnant and if she couldn't even control her sister, who was supposedly a responsible adult, how was she supposed to control a baby?

Piper's anger was growing as she pulled into the empty lot at the back of the club and walked over to the door that led to where Paige was. She rapped on it, and it was flung open by a slurring stumbling Paige

"Go home Pipurrrr." she slurred leaning heavily on the door frame. "I'm fineeeee"

"Obviously not or else I wouldn't be here right now." She pointed out taking in her sister's bruised eye, bloody mouth and matted hair. "Come on sweetie, I have to get back to the club" she said trying to stay calm not knowing how Paige would react in her drunken state. "Thank you Justin! I'll Call you!" she said waving to her old friend who was cleaning up the remnents of Paige's lunch and alchohol dinner.

As Piper led Paige by the hand outside of the club, Paige retaliated and pulled herself out of Piper's grip "No!" she shouted "I'm not going with you. You're not the boss of me!" Paige cried swatting Piper off

"You wanna bet?" Piper seethed catched Paige's wrist once again" You obviously aren't mature enough to take care of yourself."

"Am too" Paige argued wriggling out of Piper's hold yet again and elbowing her eldest sister in the process.

Piper grabbed her cheek whick had beenbanged by Paige's elbow and grew furious "That is it young lady." she yelled "You are getting in my car right this second or I swear you will regret it for the rest of your life."

Paige. whose head pounded louder and louder as the minutes went by just wanted Piper to shut it. While the logical, yet temporary resoloution to the noise would be to comply with Piper's instructions, Paige was drunk and couldn't really think straight.

Instead, she just orbed out defiantly, yet clumsily to the Golden gate park playground where she sat down on a swing feeling extremely empty. Way too empty after consuming so much alchohol. She wanted it to numb her pain, and it did for a while but now it was just elevating her level of sadness.

She let out a sob and propelled herself up and down in the air crying like a moron. Maybe if she pushed hard enoush she'd fly into heaven where all the people, her mom and dad, that cared about her were.

Yeah right.

She let the swing stop bringing her back down to earth again, where she had to face the reality of her life. Unemployment, subordination, and worst of all contempt from her sisters.

Even if they realized what they had done, she bet they wouldn't even care and would probably just tell her to stop being such a baby.

She deserved it though, she was a life ruiner. Those were Phoebe's exact words to her shortly after they vanquished Cole, like somehow she had turned him evil. Piper didn't know that, but if she did she probably would've agreed. According to Piper, she was the reason Prue died.

And believe it, that Paige knew if she ever had the chance to, Piper would murder Paige in cold blood if it meant she could have her beloved Prue back.

Well, maybe that was a little extreme, but her sisters had caused her this much pain already, there was no telling how much more they would cause until Paige snapped and left.

She wouldn't leave though. Part of her knew she needed her awful sisters. If they had stopped to ask her, they would've known she had wanted big sisters her whole life, felt an absence for them.

They might've laughed at her anyway.

Paige rubbed her eyes, knowing her MAC mascara would have left soot trails across her cheeks even though she couldn't see the evidence on her fists because it was late night outside. For all she knew, her birthday was over already. How utterly depressing.

She rose from the swing and climbed up to the top of the slide that her mother had always told her was too high and dangerous for her to be going on. Well, sadly, her mother wasn't here. If she fell off and broke an arm or whatever nobody would care anyway.

She stood at the top of the slide like a goddess and threw her arms out almost challenging destiny to come and somehow send her flying to her death. The slide was no bridge, but it still made her feel in control.

She heard a distant roar of thunder which made her laugh out loud. She always liked pretending she could control the elements. She was able to when she was the evil echantress anyway.

The rain came down hard and Paige grinned. The heavens were weeping for her and with her as her own tears mixed with the cold raindrops. Some one out there cared.

"Paige get down from there" Piper's voice rang out as Paige swang rather haphazardly, being significantly elevated and drunk, to face her drenched older sister.

"Why should I?" Paige challenged

"Because" Piper said "You are wasted, and its pouring rain out. Its time to go home."

"Home is where you have family" Paige practically screamed loving the confrontation she was having "I have no family"

Piper was taken aback at Paige's comment. She knew that alchohol truly brought out people's hidden feelings. "What do you mean?"

"Now why should I tell you that?" Paige sneered. "You mean nothing to me! Nothing!" She claimed with a tear heavy voice.

Piper didn't know how to react. She had no clue what possesed Paige's sudden rage. She decided she would solve that when they were home and out of the rain. It was decently cold, and since Paige was wearing next to nothing Piper was concerened for her health. She took a deep breath "I don't understand why you're so mad at me, but there must be a valid reason unless you are doing this for attention. I promise I will let you explain it all to me or not if thats what you want when we get to the Manor. Now, just come with me. You're drunk and are going to catch a cold."

"Ah Piper always that hint of doubt with you. And wouldn't it just be a damn shame if I got sick. Then you might actually have to take more than a moments notice of me." Paige snapped but nevertheless complied with Piper's wished and climbed into the passengers side of the Jeep

The two sat in silence the whole way home , Paige sulking and Piper trying to figure out her baby sister. She looked at her young sister's messy red curls, and her dirty and bruised delicate baby face. That combined with her sluttly clothing and venomous behavior made this person sitting next to her a stranger to Piper. How had Paige become so different? How had Piper not noticed? She had to have confidence though that her sweet Paige still existed under the rebel guise.

Paige flinched as she noticed Piper's scrutiny and defiantly turned her head so she was staring out the window, gazing at the night scape, her lips pulled into a childish pout.

At a red light, Piper caught her sister's reflection in the window, attempting a smile, thinking Paige may have been upset because she thought Piper was mad at her behaviour.

In response, Paige's eyes narrowed into a glare, but Piper could see her chin quivering despite her best attempts.

Piper's smile flipped into a frown. Paige Paige Paige. What am I going to do with you? she thought still trying to figure out what was bothering Paige and causing her to act out like this.

She didnt have much time to dwell on the matter though because as she pulled into the Manor's driveway, Paige bolted from the car and sprinted into the manor, and probably right up to her room, Piper imagined.

Piper sighed exasperated. Why wasn't Paige opening up like she usually did, but then again, she didnt usually get so extremely distraught. Maybe Phoebe could help her out.

She trudged into the manor, just in time to hear Paige's door slam angrily. She was met with Phoebes face as her little sister entered into the foyer from the kitchen.

"There you are Piper." She said "I'm guessing you still don't know whats up with Miss Moody, then?"

"Gee, Pheebs, How'd ya ever guess" Piper groaned running a hand through her disheveled hair.

"Well I guess we have some research to do. C'mon sister" she grinned pulling Piper up the stairs to invade Paige's privacy, but for a good cause.

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Meanwhile Paige had shut herself inside of her closet and was currently sitting amongst her clothes and trying to stop her pounding head. She hoped she could get some peace and quiet in here and that when her sisters came looking for her, which they would, they wouldn't think to look in there. She rested her hea din her knees and waited.

Then, she heard the footsteps.

"Well, it doesn't look like she's in here, Piper" Phoebe's voice said

"No" Piper retorted sarcastically "I swear if she left again I'm not going out after her"

Of course not, Paige thought

A door slammed

"She's not in the bathroom either." Phoebe sighed. "I guess she did leave"

"The closet" Piper whispered as the thought dawned on her "Lets check in there."

Paige groaned to herself as the door indeed opened and her sisters found her shortly huddled within one of the corners of the closet.

Paige expcted anger, chastisement, and all around insensitivity. But instead, Piper just crouched down beside her and tucked her hair behind her ear.

"Oh honey. What's the matter." She asked softly looking straight into Paige's hazel eyes.

Paige just shook her head and turned away. She was too hammered to think rationally and besides, she didn't want to face that her sister's didn't forget her birthday deliberately and that they truly didn't realize their mistake.

"No look at me. Paigey," She tried turning her sisters chin gently towards her "Why won't you talk to me? What did I do?"

Paige cracked and she felt tears come all over again. "It was my birthday today" she finally admitted looking down at her high heeled feet when she did so

Piper was in shock as was Phoebe, who was off to the side watching Piper do her job.

"Your birthday's the 14th." Piper said shock etched all over her face "That's not until.."

"Today" Paige finished bitterly

"Oh no" Piper whispered "Paige Its just I've been so busy, I.."

"Don't Piper, just don't, okay?" Paige cried with tears coursing down her rosy from alchohol cheeks. "You would've never forgotten Phoebe's birthday, or even Prue's and she's dead!"

"You're right Paige. Oh God you're right. I'm awful. I don't know how I'll ever make it up to you." Piper said her own voice shaking at her completely inexcusable slip.

"You won't" Paige sniffed " I don't mean anything to you."

Piper, unable to take seeing her sister in such emotional upset pulled Paige into her, where she immediatley felt the youngest melt into her chest, and her sobs become louder.

"Shh sweetie. Shh" Piper comforted rubbing Paige's back soothingly "You mean the world to me and Phoebe"

"Absoloutely" Phoebe agreed, joining Piper at Paige's other side

Piper felt a shift against her as Paige shooke her head vigarousely. "Than how come you never told me you loved me?" Paige argued picking her head up to look at Piper striaght on.

Both Piper and Phoebe felt their breaths catch in their throats. They really had never said I love you to Paige.

"Paigey, I'm a terrible person. I do love you, but I never said it because I was afriad it would be like I was replacing Prue." Piper evinced.

"I was just too wrapped up in my own life to notice." Phoebe realized aloud. "I love you Paige."

"Gee, that means a whole lot now." Paige spat her fists clenching.

"Baby, just calm down." Piper almost pleaded "We'll try harder. I promise."

"I'm not your baby. " Paige shook her head "You are having a baby Piper. You are going to be too busy to even blink an eye in my direction, which would be more than you do now."

"You are my baby sister, and nothing trumps that Paige. Nothing. No matter what you do, and no matter what happens I will never stop caring about you as long as I live and beyond.'

'But" Paige went to protest

"But nothing love." Piper persisted wiping stray tears from Paige's pale face. "I love you, and that is final"

"Okay" Paige said cracking her first smile of the day

"Promise me you won't do what you did tonight anymore? Paige, I don't want you o fall back into old habits."

"Yes Piper." Paige agreed leaning into her older sister who pulled her closer for hug.

"Now lets get you into some decent clothes, so I can throw these rags out." Piper instructed

"I like them' Paige pouted

"Yes but with the close watch Phoebe and I will be keeping on you, you'll never wear them again."

"Fine mother" Paige kidded

"Thats what I like to hear" Piper joked right back as Phoebe looked on in happiness to finally see her family coming back together.

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Later when Paige was lying down in her bed, getting ready to drift off to sleep, Piper wandered in and tucked the covers around Paige's exausted form, and seated herself next to her baby sister's body.

She pushed Paige's hair back from her forehead and kissed her on the head.

Paige looked up at Piper expectantly and her lips formed into a drowsy smile " I like being loved by you"

"Good because in these chaotic lives of ours, that may just be the one thing that never changes" Piper replied with a smile back. "I'm sorry I never told you sooner."

Paige shrugged from beneath her quilt."In the past"

Piper was elated to hear that Paige was begginng to forgive her. Their relationship definately needed some repairing "I still owe you." Piper argued "Now get some sleep sweetheart, because Phoebe and I are going to make damn well sure that you have the time of your life tommorow."

"Will you bake me a cake." Paige asked through a yawn sounding very much like a small child

"Duh" Piper said as she watched Paige close her eyes, sleep overwhelming her

"Happy 23rd, baby." she said softly unlatching a silver bracelet from her wrist, reaching for Paiges, and putting it on hers. The same bracelet that Prue had given her just 5 years ago on the occasion of her 23rd. " I really do love you."