Disclaimer: I own nothing! But that doesn't mean I don't want to own it. Oh well, I guess you'll be wanting the chapter now, won't you? Well, I'm not giving it! Okay, okay, I lied, I am…
Btw, the phrase "Kava doompa D'Imperiolo stupa" means "you're a lowdown Imperial fool." I didn't really feel like trying to remember the word "jerk" in Huttese so I just went with what first came to mind. Just for those who want to know, I got that out of the Galatic Phrase Book and Travel Guide… or something to that effect.
Chapter Five: Grocery Shopping
"Zekk, I don't see why you had to drag me out of the house."
"I guess I did get a bit carried away, but I'm starving and you don't have anything to eat!"
"We would've had leftovers if someone hadn't decided to start a food fight."
"You were the one who fired back."
"That was self-defense!"
"Oh, sure, I believe you."
"Kava doompa D'imperiolo stupa!"
"What?"
"I'm not translating; figure it out for yourself."
"That's not nice."
"Go kiss a Hutt."
"That's gross."
Jaina and Zekk were walking down the stairway of Jaina's apartment building due to the fact that the turbolifts were down. They finally trudged down the final few steps. Zekk sighed and looked around.
"Do you have a speeder?" he asked, looking around the parking lot andtrying to identify which one would be hers.
"Yes."
"Where is it?"
"At the Mon Calamari military headquarters."
He looked at her with a curious face. "Why is it there?"
"Lowie and I took it apart."
"Why?"
"We wanted to see if it needed a tune up. It was making some funny noises. It turned out that there was a dead fish in it. I'm still not entirely sure how it got there."
"How long ago was that?"
"A couple months."
They turned onto a pedestrian walk with Zekk walking alongside Jaina.
"You're getting lazy," Zekk muttered.
Unfortunately, Jaina heard him and whacked him in the shoulder for his trouble. "I am not! I've been really busy lately!"
He rolled his eyes. "Sure you have."
She punched him in the arm again. Zekk rubbed it and murmured, "What is this? 'Beat up on Zekk' day?"
They came to an intersection in the streets and Jaina looked around. Catching sight of a taxi, she held one hand up and gave the ship a small nudge with the Force. It landed in front of them and Jaina climbed in with Zekk following.
"Where to, Mister and/or Miss?" the driver asked.
"Nearest grocery store, please," Jaina responded.
XaXaXaXa-
(Jaina's apartment, somewhere around the same time)
Meanwhile, at Jaina's apartment, a certain someone happened to be waking up from a sugar-induced coma. He blinked sleepily and stared around at the unfamiliar setting. He yawned widely and felt like his whole body was full of lead. Distantly, he heard two voices speaking, both female sounding. Alaric Kenys yawned again, still trying to get a bearing on his surroundings. See a holopic nearby he glanced at, hoping it would give him some clue as to where he is.
It was a family shot of very familiar people but his brain was still shut down, so he processed everyone very slowly. There was some blond guy with streaks of grey in his hair, standing next to a red-head that was holding a red-headed little boy. Next to them was an old guy with salt and pepper hair with his arm around two brunettes. One of the brunettes was an older woman, presumably the mother, and the other was a younger woman bearing great resemblance to the older woman. Next to the young woman was a brown haired man who had hair and eyes that were the same color as the younger woman's and also bore great resemblance to the old man. Finally, it clicked in his brain.
I'm in Jaina Solo's apartment, he thought. Wait a nanosecond! Why am I in the Goddess's apartment!
He desperately tried to think of what he had been doing that day. Okay,woke up, made/drank caf, met up with his brother, spun around in a chair, went to med ward, and walked into a door- Ah hah! So that's what happened! Feeling rather proud of himself for figuring it out, Alaric stood up. It took him a few moments to notice a blinding pain in his head, but when he did, he let loose a torrent of words that would've made his mother wash his mouth out with 10 bars of soap.
He walked to the kitchen and pried the freezer door open. Spying an ice pack, he grabbed it and wrapped it in a towel. Then he placed it on his head. Humming an old song to himself, Alaric opened the fridge door and looked for some food. Spying a Tupperware container, Alaric took it out and looked inside. It was a nerf steak that had some fuzzy white stuff on it.
Hmm… must be some special seasoning, Al thought as he grabbed a fork and sat down with his meal on the couch. He flipped on the holoscreen before digging in his fork and taking a bite. It tasted slightly odd, not really how a nerf steak was supposed to taste. It didn't taste bad, just odd. The Goddess must have unusual tastes in food.
He looked up as two girls walked into the room. One was Jaina's pink-skinned apprentice (which he thought was very funny), Kionne, and some other girl who he didn't recognize. Alaric gave them a nod in greeting and went back to eating and watching the holoscreen. Kionne and Girl-He-Didn't-Know came over to take a peek at what he was eating.
Girl-He-Didn't-Know gave a loud 'eww', sounding more amused than disgusted and Kionne shrieked, "You shouldn't be eating that!"
Alaric gave them a confused look. "What? It's only nerf steak."
"Nerf steak with white fuzzy stuff growing on it," Girl-He-Didn't-Know commented, looking at the steak with great interest. "What's it taste like?"
"Not half bad, it's kinda rubbery but after you get over that it tastes pretty good," Alaric answered.
"That's gross!" Kionne exclaimed. "It has fungus growing on it Master Kenys!"
"It does? Where?" He asked, peering at the steak.
"It's the fuzzy white stuff!" Kionne pointed to it.
"Really? I thought that was just some weird seasoning you guys put on your nerf steak," Alaric stated.
Kionne apparently thought he was being sarcastic. "Argh! Master Kenys, you knew that was fungus!"
"No, I didn't."
"Then what's with the sarcasm?"
"I was being sarcastic? But don't you have to know that you're being sarcastic to be sarcastic?" Alaric was confused. It was far too soon after waking up for him to be thinking.
Girl-He-Didn't-Know tapped Kionne on the shoulder. She whispered something to Kionne who looked at her and said, "Oh, never mind, Master Kenys."
Now he was really befuddled. Never mind what? Absent mindedly, he took a bite of the nerf steak. This action caused Kionne and Girl-He-Didn't-Know to freak out and start shrieking.
"Master Kenys, do you have any idea what that could be doing to your digestive system?" Kionne asked.
"Don't worry; my stomach's as hard as a rock. In fact, one of my mom's favorite stories to tell is me eating half of a 20 year old fruitcake when I was seven. She says that I was perfectly fine after I ate it, but my twin, Mystiran, was sick for a few days after he ate it," Alaric commented.
"So what does it taste like, again?" Girl-He-Didn't-Know asked.
"Not half bad, a little chewy but it still goes down."
"That is so gross!" Kionne exclaimed.
"Not really," Alaric admitted, "you should see me eat muja fruit and ketchup. 'Ran nearly gets sick every time I do that in front of him."
"Muja and ketchup? That sounds gross," Girl-He-Didn't-Know stated. She blinked and then said after a few seconds, "Oh, by the way, Master Kenys, my name's Marin Macer."
Alaric shook her hand and said, "I'm Alaric Kenys."
He ate another piece of the steak, making Kionne shudder.
"Master Kenys," Kionne started, "could you please not do that? I'll do anything!"
Alaric grinned. "Okay, but you guys have to play a game with me." He gestured the girls to the general direction of the kitchen table while he put the Tupperware container in the sink. As he seated himself at the table with them, Al pulled a deck of cards out of his pocket. While he dealt them out he said, "Okay, ladies, the name of the game is-"
XaXaXaXa-
(Some random grocery store)
"Jay, why are you just throwing random things into the cart?"
"I'm not throwing 'random things', Zekk; I do look at what they are."
"For about 5 seconds."
"I have a lot to do and since you've insisted on getting food into the house-"
"That's not a crime, Jay, it's human nature to want to eat. Besides, you can get back to work later."
Jaina halted and turned around. She had a murderous gleam in her eye. Zekk panicked. He hadn't said anything offensive, had he?
"Get back to work later?" Her voice was dangerously low and she was moving towards him, causing Zekk to take a few steps back. For her short height, Jaina sure was intimidating. "I have to sift through 2,587 profiles of different candidates to fill 3 spots in my squadron, in the span of 5 days! I don't have any time to waste on the pointless activity of getting food!"
She had backed him into a shelf, glaring up at him. Zekk was torn between making a 'short' joke (because standing next tohim only made her already noticeable lack of height stand out even more) and hiding behind something to escape her wrath. He chose the latter, figuring that now would not be a good time to remind her of her height, which was already a touchy subject. Zekk took the ostrich way out and closed his eyes. He waited a couple of seconds for the verbal lashing or a whack in the shins (the only part she could effectively injure at the moment), but none came. He opened one eyelid to see Jaina inspecting some fruit.
A relieved sigh escaped from him before he could stop it. Zekk walked over to Jaina and stood next to her. Her expression was a familiar smirk that she only wore when she wasparticularly proud of something and wanted the whole world to know.
"Scared, were you?" Jaina asked.
"Wha-? I wasn't…" He realized denial would be pointless. Evidently his panic in which methods she would use to kill him had shown through the Force. "Shut up."
Jaina stuck her tongue out at him. "It was funny to watch you squirm."
"Are you sure you've recovered from your slide to the dark side? 'Cause that was definitely Sith-like."
"Dunno, ask anyone in my squadron and they'll say I'm a Sith Lord, ask anyone else and I'm not sure what they'd say, nor do I really care."
He rolled his eyes. Some things might have changed, but that part of her hadn't. She still didn't give a crap what people thought of her. Jaina walked on, this time going slower. An hour later, the two were done shopping with enough food for roughly two weeks. They hailed another cab and somehow managed to stuff 18 grocery bags and themselves into it.
XaXaXaXa-
(Jaina's apartment, w/ Jaya and Zekk just coming through the door)
Jaina and Zekk walked through the doors, each holding 6 bags with the other 6 floating behind them. The scene that greeted them as they approached the kitchen area was an odd one to say the least. At the table sat Alaric, Kionne, and Marin. Each had a solemn expression on his or her face. Zekk and Jaina observed what they were doing with great interest. They were playing some sort of card game and apparently it needed very intense concentration. Each tried to figure what they were playing but failed. With bated breath they watched as Marin opened her mouth, hoping to get some sort of clue as to what the name of the game was.
"Go fish," Marin stated firmly.
Al groaned and grabbed a card from a pile in the center. Kionne smirked at him and said, "Master Kenys, I believe that has been the eighth time you've been told to 'go fish'. I think I remember you saying that no one could stand up to you in this game." (ha ha)
"Did you know that you're a brat?" Alaric asked with a scowl.
"I've been telling her that for a long time," Jaina cut in, "if she doesn't know that yet, then she really hanging around my brother too much."
Alaric, Kionne, and Marin looked up at them. Kionne smiled at her. "Master, you tell me that three times a week."
"I'm obviously not doing it enough then. Now all three of you come help us," Jaina ordered.
Al looked confused and was going to protest but Jaina dumped the bag with the milk jug into his lap. He squeaked and then grabbed the bag off his lap and stood up to assist them. It took a lot of maneuvering around the kitchen for all of them to fit in the small space and put groceries away. After 15 minutes, every food item was put in an appropriate place and the rotten stuff was thrown out.
Eventually, Jaina sent Al home and got back to work. Kionne and Marin stayed up watching anime until they fell asleep on the couch. Zekk bugged Jaina once every hour until she finally went to bed at one in the morning.
TBC-
And that concludes this chapter. Next time will be a few weeks later and there'll be a bunch of familiar faces coming in. So until next time!
Reviews:
Dragonsdaughter1: I'm so sorry! I didn't see you when I was writing reviews for chapter 3! Thank you!
DathomiranAuthorRoamer: Thanks for telling me about the editing thing! The caf and sugar comes from personal experience because at a friend of mine's party, people were mixing pixie sticks with Mountain Dew (I don't own either of those!), things got pretty scary. Thanks for reviewing!
SeekeroftheCharter: Thanks! Yippee, another person who thinks Jaina and Zekk should be together. There are too few of us out there.
