Disclaimer: I don't own anything in my fanfic.

Sofaspud23: Welcome to Chapter 2 of Tales of Symphonia DX: Read Between the Lines! Sorry it took so long to finish, but I was busy doing nothing! Plus, I started on a couple other fanfics, and I'm only probably going to start one of them. Read and enjoy!

CHAPTER II: THE TEMPLE

At the end of the last chapter, our trio of troubled teenagers had just left the schoolhouse and were just beginning their journey.

"SHINY!" Genis cried out as he spotted the Save Circle.

"What the hell is that? It looks like it's made of liquid, but it's not..."

"Oh, I know!" Colette said in astonishment that she actually knew something, "It's a Save Circle! If you walk into it and press A then you can save your progress!"

This is a Save Circle. If you walk into it and press the A Button then you can save your progress.

"That's what I just said! Damn disembodied voices..." said Colette.

Lloyd and Colette glanced over to Genis, who was jumping around in the Save Circle, when suddenly a floating skull floated up to them. "Hey buddy, you like watches? I got watches. Lots of 'em."

"I dunno," said Lloyd, "My dad always told me to never accept watches from strange floating skulls."

"C'mon! They're Rallix! Only 20 Gald each! What a bargain! I amaze myself sometimes!" said the skull.

"Real Rallix? Awesome! Wait...it's Rolex, not Rallix! You're lying to us!" Lloyd concluded.

"Damn, you figured me out! Time to die, then!"

"You first!" Lloyd called out.

Genis suddenly noticed the floating skull and stopped jumping around and said, "Wagdibogdom!" No subtitles appeared.

"Now I get it! I was wondering why you kept talking in gibberish! Let's see..." Lloyd adjusted a strange device on Genis' left molar, and Genis cold finally speak English!

"Thanks, dude. So like I said, Holy crap! A monster! I thought the temple place was like a sanctuary!"

"The Chosen's trial is supposed to include fighting monsters, right? So that must be why it's here." said Lloyd

"Oh, yeah! I forgot that my trial has to do with monsters!" exclaimed Colette.

"Uh, not to be rude or anything, but when I say, 'Time to die', then that usually cues the battle." the skull said impatiently.

"Right! Let's take this thing out!" said Lloyd.

"Roger!" said Genis. Then the entire village exploded into shards of glass and the skull transformed into a zombie!

"Whoa, how did that happen?" Lloyd wondered aloud.

The zombie was just as surprised. "Whoa, I've got a body now! Sweet! Now I shall kill you with my newly formed arms and legs!"

Lloyd ran at the zombie and hit him with his wooden swords. It only did 3 damage. "Dammit! I even calculated the force of gravity at 0.9345 and the momentum of my swords at 4.5235 and, judging by that, it should've hit the zombie with a total force of 9.3234!" Lloyd cried out in despair.

"Dumbass," Colette muttered to herself as she swung her chakrams at the zombie, slicing off its newly formed arms and legs.

"No! My newly formed arms and legs!" cried the zombie.

"Get ready, dudes! Like, Fireball!" Three tiny fireballs each the size of Genis' pinky fingernail flew out of his weird flingy kendama thing. When they struck the zombie, he exploded into two white lines and faded away. After the battle, the group held a small conversation. "Like, Dwarven Vow #7! Chyaa..." cried Genis.

"Goodness and love will always win!" Colette cheered happily.

"SHUT THE HELL UP ABOUT THE STUPID DWARVEN VOWS!" Lloyd yelled at the top of his lungs.

Then there was complete darkness...and then the village returned! "That was the weirdest thing ever." Lloyd managed to gasp out.

"Are you kidding, man? That was wicked awesome, dude! Sweet! Let's do it again!" said Genis.

"How did that happen, anyway?" Colette asked, "Well anyway, I thought the zombie looked kinda cute. I don't see why we had to kill it!"

"The zombie?" Lloyd cried, stunned, "What do you mean the zombie looked cute? It was dead!"

"So? That doesn't mean that it can't be cute!" Colette retorted.

"Dudes! Shut up! Here comes another one!" Genis yelled. And, much to their dismay, the very same floating skull had returned.

"But you just exploded into two white lines and faded away!" Lloyd exclaimed.

"No, I'm a different skull. I just look exactly the same." the skull told the three.

"Right, whatever. Let's just take it down quickly." Lloyd said as he drew his swords.

"Wait, Lloyd! The Professor told us that the moon is made of cheese! So if we go there, then we would have a lifetime supply of cheese!" Colette reminded Lloyd.

"Yeah, dude! That'd rock! We could, like, each cheese...a lot." said Genis.

"Can we just get this over with?" Lloyd asked impatiently.

"Fine," Genis and Colette said in unison. Then the village exploded into shards of glass as it had before, and the floating skull turned into a zombie and a ghost.

"Fireball!" Genis exclaimed as three tiny fireballs hit the ghost. He shouted "Fireball!" a few more times, and Lloyd was getting annoyed.

"Will you just cast something other than Fireball for once?" Lloyd asked, having already defeated the zombie.

"I don't know how to do anything else!" Genis replied.

"Ray Thrust!" Colette said and her attack caused the ghost to explode into thin lines that slowly faded away.

"How did that work out? I thought only magic attacks could hurt stuff that wasn't real!" a confused Lloyd wondered out loud.

"Dude, who cares?" asked Genis. Nobody had an answer to that, so the three of them went on their merry little way.

"So Colette," said Lloyd, "What's the temple like?"

"The temple? What temple?" asked Colette.

"You know, the one we're going to?" said Lloyd.

"I dunno. I've never been there!" said Colette.

"Then how do we know where it is!" exclaimed Lloyd.

"We just follow the long, warm tunnel with the glowing white light at the end of it! I saw your mom there one time, Lloyd! She was crazy. She kept going on about some Cruxis stuff. But she's dead, so that doesn't matter! Let's get going! But first, we have to find the tunnel!" responded Colette.

Lloyd and Genis just stared in bewildered astonishment as Colette trudged onward.

As they left the village, they suddenly grew huge! The buildings were like little dollhouses! So after a few minutes of Genis running around Iselia like he was Godzilla, the group headed for the Martel Temple. "Eeek! I'm so psyched! I can't believe I'm actually going to meet the Fronstreet Guys!" Colette squealed.

"Hold on. That big blob with eyes looks suspicious. I don't like the looks of it." said Lloyd.

"Oh crap, here it comes!" Genis cried. Then, once again, the area around them exploded into shards of glass, and the blob turned into a bird!

"Man, I'll never get used to that." Lloyd commented.

"I dunno if we can beat this one, guys. Look at how strong that bird is! I mean, we've got swords and magic and stuff, but I don't think that we stand a chance against this bird!" said Colette worriedly.

The three of them tried as hard as they could, and they barely beat the bird. After it turned into lines and faded away, Lloyd noticed that Colette was unconscious. So he picked her up and carried her to the Martel Temple, where she suddenly sprang back to life! It was a miracle!

"Get your hands off me, you perv! I was almost to the light, too!" Colette cried out. Lloyd set her down gently, and she started to run up the stairs but tripped. "Ouch! What was that for?"

"But I didn't do anything!" said Lloyd.

"Yes, you did! You tripped me!" Colette snapped.

"No, I didn't!" Lloyd declared.

"Then what did I trip on? Air?" asked Colette.

"Probably," Lloyd said simply.

"Dude! Look at all the commotion at the temple!" said Genis, pointing. They looked, and much to Lloyd's surprise there was a huge crowd of people there, and the Fronstreet Guys were singing their number one hit, Love Is Like A Peanut Butter Sandwich with Extra Ketchup but Please Hold the Onions

"Omigosh! It's them! It's the Frontstreet Guys!" As she spoke, one of the priests, obviously drunk, stumbled down the steps and collapsed on the ground in front of them.

"Whoa! He's like, dead!" exclaimed Genis.

"Pastor, are you alright?" asked Lloyd.

The pastor then stood up and stripped off his clothes, severely disturbing the trio of troubled teenagers. He then ran back up the steps to the concert.

After a long pause, Colette murmured, "I'm going."

"But what about the naked guy?" asked Genis.

"I'm scared, but I have to go. It's my job to go to every Frontstreet Guys concert I can," answered Colette.

"What? Dude, you aren't gonna let her go by herself, are you?" Genis asked Lloyd

"I'll wait for you. I don't wanna take the chance of seeing some naked priest guy!" said Lloyd.

"Dude, you're crazy!" said Genis. Then, in a whisper, "It'd be like your first date with Colette, man! Or as close to a date as you'll ever get! C'mon, man! Show some courage!" Genis then ran off to catch up with Colette.

"Fine, I'll go!" said Lloyd. He ran after Genis and they walked up the stairs.

Once at the top, Colette screamed and ran up to the Frontstreet Guys. "I absolutely LOVE you guys! I know all your names! There's Forcystus, Magnius, Kvar, Rodyle, and the only girl, Pronyma! I've loved you for as long as I can remember!"

"The Chosen is here, so we must go. We must make sure Yggdrasill knows," said Forcystus.

"No way! I'm not leaving this concert, believe it!" Magnius cried.

"Although the Fronstreet Guys we are, the boss will kick our behinds far, if inform him we do not, of what is what and what is naught." Forcystus answered.

"What the hell does that mean!" asked Magnius.

"Please, Magnius! Don't use the H-E-double-hockey-sticks word in front of Rodyle!" said Pronyma. She then covered Rodyle's ears with her hands.

"Goo goo wa wa! HELL!" said Rodyle, who was only 2 years old.

"Oh now look what you've done! Now he'll just keep saying that over and over again!" snapped Pronyma.

"Wha---aah! I'm sorry, little guy! I really am! Believe it!" said Magnius hurriedly.

"Crikey! We've got ourselves a couple o' humans and a half-elf! Now we better be extra quiet, we don't wanna spook 'em!" said Kvar.

"I am not going to say it again! We'd better be gone on the count of ten!" said Forcystus in irritation.

"HELL! HELL! HELL! HELL!" Rodyle screamed.

"Crikey, slow down there little fella!" said Kvar to Rodyle, "Well, wasn't this an exciting episode? Join us next time when we study the bizarre ways of the hillbilly! Thanks for watching!" Then the Fronstreet Guys teleported away, leaving the trio of troubled teenagers standing in front of an unconscious, drunk, naked, priest guy.

"NOOOOO! I didn't even get their autographs! NOOOOOO!" cried Colette in agony.

"NOOOOO! I'm blind! The naked dude! My eyes! NOOOOO!" cried Genis in agony.

"Hey wait a minute, somebody's coming up the steps!" said Lloyd. It was only Phaidra.

"Aaah!" she called out upon seeing the trio of troubled teenagers, "The Desians! They've killed the priest and stripped him of his clothes!" It was just at that moment that a strange man in a blue shirt much too small for him, with a yellow afro and bizarre black bellbottom pants came up the steps to the temple. Alongside him were two troubled teenagers; a girl with pink hair and a guy with white, and what looked like the Sunny Delight label. "Run, Botta!" cried Phaidra.

"You mean Bottabo-Bo Bot-tabo!" said this mysterious being.

"Dude, there he is!" said Genis.

"What the heck?" asked Lloyd in confusion.

"Bottabo! Your life is mine!" Colette called out.

"I won't let you Desians get away with anything, fool!" said Bottabo.

"Ha! Desians? Us? Now that's funny." said Lloyd.

"What's so funny, huh? Huh? Huh? HUH?" asked the Sunny Delight label.

"Uh, nothing, I..." Lloyd started. The two troubled teenagers following Bottabo came up to him. The one with white hair spoke first.

"Don't worry, he's always like this. He's nuts." he said.

"I hate to say it, but Gasser's right. Bottabo is nuts." said the pink-haired one.

"Gasser? Your name's Gasser? Haha! That's hilarious!" Lloyd laughed out.

"Yeah! You wanna know why, jerkface?" said Gasser as he turned around and cried, "Fist of the Backwind!" Lloyd was flung back by the force of the attack from Gasser's hindquarters, and had real difficulty breathing. The smell was awful! When the air had finally cleared, the four mysterious figures were fighting another,stranger mysterious figure with even stranger hair.

"Gasser! Stay clear of Captain Battleship! He'll beat you all up!" Bottabo warned, "You too, Beauty!" So Gasser and the girl with pink hair ran off to where Genis, Colette, and Lloyd were, making a total of five troubled teenagers! It's a new record!

"Don Patch! Can you hear me?" asked Bottabo.

"Loud and clear, Bottabo." replied the Sunny Delight label.

"I want you to take a big bite of dirt!" Bottabo said.

"What? Why! Is it Superdirt? Yes! I love Superdirt!" said Don Patch and then began devouring the dirt in front of the temple, leaving a giant hole there. "Now what? Will I become Super Patch?"

"No, I just wanted to see you eat some dirt. Go back with Beauty and the others." replied Bottabo.

"So...I just ate that dirt for nothing? It wasn't Superdirt?" asked Don Patch.

"Nope, it wasn't Superdirt." replied Bottabo.

"Then...I was...deceived. But I swear, I WILL fine a big clearing in a magical forest filled with Superdirt! Then I'll become Super Patch and save the world from aliens with my Super Patch Powers! Oh yeah!" yelled Don Patch and then ran to join Beauty, Gasser, Lloyd, Genis, and Colette.

"Super Fist of Nosehair! Snot For You!" cried Bottabo. And, much to the surprise and utter unsettlement of the trio of troubled teenagers, Bottabo's nosehairs flew out of his nose and attacked Captain Battleship! But alas,Captain Battleshipwouldn't go down that easily! He started sucking Bottabo up through his nose!"Aaah! No! It can't end like this! I'm too young to be a nacho!"

"Yes...soon the world will be bald! Muahahahaha!" said Captain Battleship.

Then another mysterious figure clad in purple with maroonish-brown hair appeared out of nowhere and struck downCaptain Battleshipin one swift strike.Captain Battleshipwas dead before Bottabo could be sucked in.

"Damn! I never thought you'd show up! Retreat for now!" said Bottabo. He motioned with his hand and Don Patch left with him. Just as Beauty was about to leave, the mysterious swordsman stopped her and grabbed her in an inappropriate way...

"Hey, cutie! Howsabout you show me--AUGH! THAT SMELL! IT BURNS!" the mysterious swordsman was flung off into the hole that Don Patch had dug by Gasser's Fist of the Backwind. Then Beauty and Gasser buried him alive and went on their way.

Once they had left and the air was clean, Colette remembered something. "Oh! I have to accept the oracle! Grandmother, I'm going to undergo the trial now."

"Is that all you can say after what just happened?" asked Lloyd.

"Dude! The guy in the pit's still alive! He's diggin' his way out!" exclaimed Genis.

Lloyd, Colette, Genis, and Phaidra walked over to the "grave." The mysterious swordsman jumped out, did a few flips, and landed on his feet perfectly. He saw Colette first, and immediately rushed over to her. "Hey, hottie, what's up?" he asked her and was promptly slapped. "Oww! Geez, what was that for? You try to show a friendly gesture, and everybody gets all mad at you all of a sudden! Geez!"

"So, like we were saying before this guy came in, what trial?" said Lloyd.

"The monsters, I assume. An evil presence radiates from inside this chapel." said the new guy.

"Will you just stay out of this!" yelled Lloyd.

"Shut up, Lloyd. Nobody likes you," said Genis, Colette, and Phaidra in unison.

"You," said the new guy, pointing to Lloyd, "Your name's Lloyd?"

"Yeah," said Lloyd arrogantly, "But who are you to ask for my name?"

After a pause came the guy's reply, "I'm Kratos, an angel of Cruxis who is really your father who is your friend butisn't your friend and basically just mixes up the storyline and confuses things."

"I didn't quite catch that last part, what?" asked Lloyd.

"I'm Kratos, a mercenary. As long as you can pay me, I'll accept the job of guarding the Chosen." said Kratos.

"Wait...we didn't tell you Colette was the Chosen One! So that must mean...that you're Colette's long lost cousin!" Genis determined.

"OK! Hi, cousin!" said Colette cheerfully.

"Okay sure, whatever. Let's go with that." said Kratos.

"Fine then! Now that we know who the hell you are, let's just get in the temple!" said Lloyd angrily.

"Wait! I was about to say, 'The Chosen is to receive judgment from heaven.' I couldn't wait to say it! Come on! Let me say it! Pleeeease?" complained Phaidra.

"Yeah! And I was gonna say, 'This isn't a field trip, you know.' Just let us say the cool stuff! Come on!" Kratos complained as well.

"...Gotcha. Then I'm just gonna wait inside for you people to finish talking!" So Lloyd entered the temple and waited, while the others stayed outside and left to see "War of the Worlds," at the Iselia theater and booed for most of the movie because they all hate Tom Cruise. (I apologize to any Tom Cruise fans, but I think he's a jackass) By the time they got back to the temple it was midnight, so they all decided to stay at Colette's house for the night! Then they left Phaidra in the village and met Lloyd inside the temple, who had been running from Raine the whole time they were gone. "It was like a horror movie, only scarier 'cause you're actually in it!" he wrote in his autobiography some time later.

"Lloyd," Kratos said as they entered the temple, "Are your sword skills self-taught?"

Lloyd nodded and said, "Yeah, that's right."

"Then you SUCK! Man, no wonder! You're like the worst swordsman I've ever seen! I mean, geez! I wondered if your grandma taught you how to use swords or something! But now I know it was someone way worse! And, come on! Wood? Puh-lease! Try "metal", lame-brain!" said Kratos, "Here, take this. It'll help you learn the basics.

Acquired Playboy magazine.

"How the hell am I supposed to use this?" asked Lloyd.

"What do you---oh crap! That's mine! Wrong book!"

Returned the Playboy magazine to Kratos.

Acquired Tales of Symphonia for Dummies.

"Oh, so you attack with A instead of Q?" asked Lloyd, interested.

"Uh, Lloyd, there's not even a Q button on the controller." Genis pointed out.

"What is this "controller" that you speak of? Please do tell." said Lloyd.

"You see, since we're half-elves, ah, I mean, elves, and we're way more superior than you inferior human beings, we always get the coolest stuff! Like this one time, we got this box with an X on it! We call it, "The Box-X". Cool name, huh? Well anyway, it was like green and black, but then we got the "Box-X 360", which cost us, like, five hundred thousand Gald! It was really cheap! Anyway, we just got it last week. And it uses controllers."

"You could've just told me you meant that thing you play Halo 2 on constantly. I don't see why you enjoy looking at a screen and killing stuff when you can really experience it!" commented Lloyd.

"Two reasons. One: Can you blast aliens with Needlers and rocket launchers in the real world?" said Genis. Two: Can you battle and/or chat with anyone all around the world instantly in real life? And finally, three: Can I, being a weak little shrimp who looks like a three-year-old, really do anything worth mentioning in real life?" said Genis.

"That's three reasons, but that doesn't matter. What matters is that those were questions, not reasons. You can't answer a question with another question!" Lloyd exclaimed.

"Yes you can! I'll show you! Let's both talk in only questions until we leave the temple! Say something that's not a question and you lose! Winner gets this shiny nickel that I found on the ground over there! Deal?" said Genis.

"Deal," said Lloyd. "Staaaaaaart, NOW!"

"Dude, what's that?" asked Genis, indicating the blue forcefield blocking their path to the top chamber of the temple.

"Doesn't it look awesomeo possomo? I'm gonna touch it!" said Colette as she reached out and poked the forcefield with her pointer finger. She was electrocuted!

"Awesomeo Possomo? What the heck?" asked Genis.

"What's going on, Colette?" asked Lloyd.

"Isn't is obvious, man?" asked Genis.

"Isn't what obvious?" asked Lloyd.

"Can't you tell, dude?" asked Genis.

"Can you tell?" asked Lloyd.

"Why don't you answer me first?" asked Genis.

"Didn't I say earlier that you can't answer a question with another question?" asked Lloyd.

"Why should I care?" asked Genis.

"Hey, is Colette alright?" asked Lloyd.

"Don't change the subject--" Genis began.

"Was that a question?" asked Lloyd.

"Well...no..." Genis mumbled.

"Then I believe that you owe me a shiny nickel!" Lloyd exclaimed.

"NO! I WILL NEVER GIVE AN INFERIOR BEING LIKE YOU EXTRA CASH! NEVER!" screamed Genis.

"Aaah! Colette! She's on the floor!" yelled Lloyd.

"Huh?" asked Kratos, who suspiciously brought his hand down from inside his nose and wiped it on his shirt.

"Uhh...what was your hand doing by your nose like that?" asked Lloyd, slowly backing away.

"I was...uh...trying...to use the Fist of the Nosehair like Bottabo did!" said Kratos.

"Riiight, dude. Whatever. Just don't do it around me...ever." said Genis.

"Hey! Colette's unconscious! She needs mouth-to-mouth!" Kratos exclaimed, suddenly noticing Colette. He then lunged at Colette, only to be blocked by one of Lloyd's wooden swords. "Oww..."

"All she needs is a Life Bottle, you pervert," said Lloyd, attempting to use the Life Bottle, "How the heck do you use this, anyway? Do I just dump it down her throat or just on top of her, or what?"

"Dude, how would we know? We're not healers or anything!" said Genis.

"Your sister's a healer!" said Lloyd.

"Yeah, but all she knows is First Aid! What kind of a healer is that?" said Genis.

"Good point." said Lloyd.

Far within the temple, Raine sneezed. She thought to herself, When you sneeze, somebody's supposed to be talking about you somewhere else. She discarded the thought and went back to examining the temple.

"Hey! All I know is First Aid! And Demon Fang! That's more than you know, Lloyd!" said Kratos, defending this "Raine" person. She sounded hot to him.

"I know what you're thinking, man! That's not cool! If you lay a finger on a single hair on my sister's head, then I swear I'll hit you with a Fireball the size of my pinky fingernail!"

"Simmer down, simmer down! I won't try anything, especially with your "super-powerful" magic spells defending her," said Kratos. Genis missed the sarcasm. "You might wanna try being a little nicer to me, since I'm the only one here who can use First Aid and Life Bottles. So shut up and let me work." He used the Life Bottle on Colette, and it turned out that all you had to do was open the bottle and lift it in the air! Go figure!

"Dammit, Lloyd! I was almost at the light, too! I could see my great-grandma, and she's dead! We could've had so many awesomeo possomo conversations together! But no, you just had to ruin it, didn't you?" said Colette.

"But you almost died! And besides, Kratos saved you, not me!" said Lloyd.

"Don't lie to me! I know when you're lying and when you're not!" said Colette.

"Sure, whatever you say, your highness," said Lloyd in an irritated way.

"Shut up, Lloyd. Nobody likes you," said Kratos, Genis, and Colette at the same time. Then they all went downstairs together.

"Hey, look! It's, like, a ring! Omigosh! That would, like, so totally work with my new dress! I like, have to have it!" said Colette excitedly.

"Okay then, let's just jump over there. That's easy enough." said Lloyd.

"DUUUUDE!" cried Genis as he spotted a rock golem walking around the room.

The golem spotted their group and said, "Hello. I am C-3P0, human-cyb---augh!" Kratos had sliced off its head.

"Kratos! What was that for? He seemed friendly enough!" said Lloyd.

"He was ugly. I think Kratos did him a favor. Now he won't have to suffer anymore!" said Colette.

"You're the one who thinks zombies are cute!" Lloyd pointed out.

"Well, you've gotta admit, he was pretty hot..." mumbled Colette.

"Sometimes I wonder what goes on in that head of yours..." said Lloyd.

"Dudes! It like, turned into a rock!" said Genis.

"It was sort of a rock in the first place..." Kratos corrected Genis.

"No, it was a boulder! An ugly boulder! Not a rock, a boulder! And now it's a rock!" said Colette.

"Boulders and rocks are like, the same thing, dude," said Genis.

"Nuh-uh!" said Colette.

"Yea-huh!" said Genis.

"Nuh-uh!" said Colette.

"Yea-huh!" said Genis.

"Nuh-uh!" said Colette.

"Yea-huh!" said Genis.

"Nuh--" Colette began.

"SHUT THE HELL UP, ALL OF YOU LITTLE BRATS!" Kratos screamed, but added on a side note, "Except for you, my beloved Colette...ack! What the hell was that for? I was just being nic--oww! Okay, okay! I give up! I--ouch! What was that one for? I didn't even do anything!" said Kratos in-between several slaps from Colette.

"Are you ready to shut up or do you want another slap?" asked Colette angrily.

"No, I'm cool." said Kratos.

"Hey, dude! Sweet! It moves, man! That kicks ass!" said Genis as he pushed the block into one of the holes.

"Oh, I get it!" said Lloyd immediately, "Now another one should---there it is!" And, sure enough another golem materialized in front of them! How about that?

"Dammit, this is gonna take forever, man! Like, why don't we just jump over those tiny little gaps to the ring?" asked Genis.

"Don't be stupid, Genis. That would never work. Nobody can jump!" Colette said as if this were the most obvious thing in the world.

"We can jump in battles, man! And we can jump back like we're startled or sumthin'! So why not forward, man? It only makes sense." said Genis.

"You can believe in jumping, or Bigfoot, or the Tooth Fairy if you wanna but I'm gonna do this the hard way so I can strain my bones, hurt my back, and maybe even die!" said Lloyd happily.

Genis, however, didn't feel the same way. He jumped over the tiny little spaces in the floor and ran over to the Sorcerer's Ring. "Duuude! I jumped! This rocks, man! Tchaaaa..."

After many grueling hours of hard work and confusion, Lloyd, Colette, and Kratos finally arrived at the Sorcerer's Ring next to Genis. "How'd you get here so fast?" asked Colette.

"I jumped, man! It was awesome! I like, pushed my legs down and I went up!" Genis cried.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Let's just get the ring for my beautiful Colette!" said Kratos.

"Shut up!" said Colette.

"Oh! Umm, I mean, uh, my very ugly Colette! Yeah! She's so ugly it isn't even funny!" said Kratos hurriedly. Colette glared daggers at him. "Or, on second thought, you, uh, you see..." Kratos rambled.

"Argh! Can we just grab the ring and go?" asked a pissed-off Colette. But as she reached for the ring, Lloyd spoke.

"Argh? What was that? What are you, a pirate or something? Argh, matey! There be treasure on that island!"

"Shut up, Lloyd. Nobody likes you." said everyone else. (even Sheena in the far away land of Tethe'alla, and she didn't even know Lloyd yet) With that remark, Colette snatched the Sorcerer's Ring from its pedestal. Then the earth began to shake and a huge boulder (that's right, a boulder, not a rock) came tumbling down from the ceiling, missing their whole group by several yards and crashing into the shadows to the left.

"That was pointless," said Lloyd simply, "Oh, geez! What's that smell? It's nasty, whatever it is!"

Everyone looked around the room, searching for the source of the smell. "W-why is everyone looking at me?" asked Kratos shakily, "I didn't wet myself!"

"Oh, nasty, man!" cried Genis, "This is almost as bad as that naked guy at the concert!"

"Please, Genis, we're all trying to forget that," said Colette with a shudder.

"Can we go now, or do we need to change Kratos?" asked Lloyd.

"Nah, I'm fine. That's not the first time today I've wet my pants and it won't be the last!" said Kratos.

After a long silence, Lloyd said, "Aaawkward..." and dashed up the stairs, quickly followed by Genis, Colette, and Kratos. "Hurry up, you three! The public demands that we finish this chapter ASAP! Theauthor has been writing the chapter way too slow so people are pulling out the big guns! Now, move it!"

"But I'm tired..." complained Kratos.

"You can sleep when you're dead! PRIVATE BRUNEL! DID YOU NOT HEAR ME WHEN I TOLD YOU TO HUSTLE?" said Lloyd.

"SIR, YES, SIR! I mean, no, err, yes, no...maybe? You tricked me!" said Colette.

"ARE YOU QUESTIONING MY AUTHORITY, PRIVATE?" screamed Lloyd, spraying spit in everybody's face.

"Shut up, Lloyd. Nobody likes you." said everyone. Colette even added, "And get some mouthwash or something 'cause your breath reeks.

"But Scope is too strong for my delicate teeth!" said Lloyd.

"Haven't you heard, Lloyd? Now there's Listerine with 25 percentless sting! Screw those guys at Scope! Choose Listerine!" said Genis.

"Wow! Do tell, Genis!" said Lloyd, amazed.

"Be quiet, you two, I'm shooting fire out of the fancy new ring I got!" said Colette as she blasted a huge fireball out of the Sorcerer's Ring.

"Duuude! That thing's bigger than my Fireballs that I shoot out of my kendama!" shouted Genis. The forcefield shut down and the group jumped into the shiny purple light thingy, and they all stretched into nothing! What has become of our trio of troubled teenagers and Kratos? Does Kratos really wet his pants all the time? And what the hell is wrong with Genis? Find out in the next exciting chapter of Tales of Symphonia DX: Read Between the Lines!

That's the end of this chapter! Thanks for reading!

Next time: The Angel

Fake accents, laser swords, and bad rhymesare everywherein the next exciting chapter of Tales of Symphonia DX: Read Between the Lines! The trio of troubled teenagers and Kratos meet up with an angel of heaven! He might not be exactly what you'd expect, though. To solve the mystery of his identity, be here for the next chapter! Although, if this chapter is anything to go by, the chapter won't be here for a while...a long while!

In the meantime, I'm holding a little contest every chapter! If you've read Sonic Stupidity, then you might recognize it since Derek the Demon Prince stole my idea and put it in his story! If you can guess what TV Show Botta was from in this chapter and name seven characters from the show, then you can have some input into the next chapter. Or, alternately, if you can name the personalities of each of the Fronstreet Guys (some of them aren't from specific shows), then that'll count as well. Just send in a review like you normally would, but add in your answer(s) and what you want to put in the next chapter if you'd like.

Hints:

1. As you could probably tell, Botta is from the craziest show ever made. It's animated, and most people probably think it's stupid. I already named four characters in this chapter.

2. Like I said, the Frontstreet Guys aren't all from specific movies or shows or games. In fact, two of them are from TV shows and the other three are pretty much generic.