Chapter 5
"So, why were you in the middle of the desert so unprepared?" Vash asked Edward after serving him some soup and a sandwich, and sitting down in the chair across from him. Edward, who had attacked the food gratefully, choked at the unexpected question. Once he had gulped some water down and recovered a bit, he looked at Vash. Even though Edward trusted him (he had, after all, saved them), he knew that the truth would be too outrageous for the tall man to believe, and they'd probably be kicked out of the house. Considering they were in the middle of the desert with nowhere else to go, that was a very bad thing.
"W-what do you mean?" he asked, frantically thinking of a plausible-sounding story. Hopefully he'd be able to find Rosette and tell her the plan before she said anything to revealing to Vash's brother, who was evidently taking care of her.
Vash looked at him oddly. "Well, you were out when the suns are at their zenith, without hat, transportation, or provisions. For all intents and purposes, it was almost like… like- well, like you had popped out of nowhere into the desert."
Edward laughed, which sounded forced even to his ears. "Yeah, that's right… popped out of nowhere… that's a… good one." 'Jeez, this guy's sharp,' he thought. 'My only refuge is that he doesn't know how sharp he is.'
Vash raised an eyebrow. "Plus, as a bonus of weirdness, you didn't flip out when I said my name was Vash the Stampede, the Humanoid Typhoon. I know this sounds egotistical, but I thought that everyone on this planet had heard of me."
Edward's frantic brain finally seized on something. "Uh- we're from a ways off. A long ways off. And well, we don't get much news from- way out here, so that's why we've never heard of you. Sister Rosette was charged with- uh..." Edward searched for the word- "a mission! Yes, she was to bring a very important item to the chapel. I was accompanying the good Sister so she wouldn't be- accosted! That's the word, 'accosted'. By bandits and stuff. Anyway, we ran out of food and water and then you came to our rescue!" Edward finished his babbling, looking at the man in front of him to see if he bought it.
Vash looked at him curiously, thenleaned back in his chair and looked towards the ceiling of the mess hall, silent for a moment.
The mess hall's name was misleading- it was neither a mess, nor a hall. Rather, it was more like an enlarged kitchen- with a stove alongside one wall, a washing basin, an island counter with pots and pans hanging from a rack suspended by chains over it in the middle of the floor by the washing basin and stove, an icebox for meat, a vegetable bin, a hearth with a small fire in it, and the long dining table where they were currently sitting, all immaculate and dust-free. The only reason Edward could think of as to why it was called that was a large wooden plaque situated above the door that read "Mess Hall".
"So, let me get this straight," the spiky blonde said slowly. "You're from somewhere that's far, far away from the rest of civilization, you were accompanying the nun as protection from said far away place to somewhere around here, when you ran out of provisions and were left wandering the desert, lost, alone and confused." Vash looked at him. "I didn't leave anything out, did I?"
"Only the part about the robbery," said a female voice from under the "Mess Hall" sign behind him.
There stood Rosette, behind a man in a wheelchair, who was probably the brother Vash had mentioned, determinedly not looking at the alchemist. Edward noticed the brother had a metal arm as well, his left, just like Vash. Edward felt almost normal, as Rosette was the only one in the room with all of her original appendages. The nun sidestepped the chair to walk towards the table. "There was a- bandit that attacked us, and in the confusion he-" at this, she shot the alchemist a withering glare- "lost the item he was supposed to be guarding.." Edward suspected that she was only just managing to restrain herself from resuming their earlier scuffle, but he wasn't too concerned about it- at the moment it , was more important that their host believe them. She was obviously smart enough to realize they needed a cover story, and had just supported his bungled version beautifully.
Vash turned and stood up. Suddenly he was no longer the sauve saviour Edward had seen; now he was a drooling pervert. "Hi, I'm Vash," he said, his eyes large and glistening, trying to slip an arm around her waist, the other hand coming dangerously close to her chest.
Edward was shocked; he had seemed so calm, so in-control, even when Edward was relating his admittedly bizarre story to him, and now here he was, acting like an idiot because of a girl! He shook his head. No wonder his brother took over the care of Rosette- Vash evidently couldn't handle it.
Rosette had been told by the other sisters- most notably Anna, Claire and Mary- that if a guy got to first base, he'd try for second. If he got to second, he would undoubtedly go for third. And when he got third, he'd try his luck at a home run. Rosette was determined that this guy, whether he saved her life or not, was going to strike out long before then, even if she had to knock him out. Which is exactly what she did when his hand made contact.
From behind her, she could hear a dry chuckle of approval from Knives.
"Ow." Vash moaned, cold cloth to his forehead. It had taken him a little over an hour to recover from the devastating blow Rosette had landed on him; a half-twist double-spiral with middle-knuckle extended, right to the temple. Rosette later admitted she was impressed; usually when she hit something with one of her specials, they stayed down indefinitely. Of course, all that meant was that next time she would hit harder. And she made sure Vash was aware of her new policy, to which he readily swore to respect.
While he had been out cold on the floor (as no one had thought or bothered to move him- they figured he deserved it), Rosette had asked Knives (the seemingly more rational of the two) again where they were. This time, she got a response.
"Underground," was all he would say. She got a sense that, though she had impressed him by punching out Vash, she still had a long way to go to gain his trust. Which she figured was only fair, but she would feel a lot better knowing where they were situated. Edward had stayed silent the whole time, as if afraid she would do the same thing to him, only worse. After all, if that was how she acted when a guy touched her in the wrong place, how much damage did she deal out if you broke her arm? Edward was sure that was one piece of information he could live without.
Instead, he had occupied himself as to where the devil had gone. It was obviously still alive, because both he and the Sister were,
(fighting for his life in a sea of yellow and blue-)
and devils were hardier than humans.
(yellow eyes glowing with greed- trying to kill him-)
Edward stopped trying to remember. The memories, and nightmares, would come of their own accord, in their own time. Right now he decided to try to preoccupy himself. "So, why do you guys live underground in the middle of a desert?" he asked the brothers.
All he got was a blank stare from Vash and a guarded look from Knives, which he took as answer enough.
For now.
Inside the briefcase were devil's Horns.
The reactions to the unholy artifacts were varied. Sister Kate took a sharp intake of breath and sat up straight like a bolt, automatically crossing herself. Minister Remington's hand strayed to the hilt of his sword, not drawing it but keeping it handy if the need arose.
Chrno merely stared at them. Horns to devils were like lungs to humans- both collected a vital resource for the body to use to sustain itself, and if either the lungs or Horns were lost, their owner was a dead man. Chrno had lost his Horns nearly sixty years before and relied upon Rosette to sustain him with her life force, known as Astral energy, transferred through the Clock Seal. Seeing a pair here, not worn by any devil, ignited a longing -to be able to use his old powers as he wished without worrying about the drain on Rosette- that was so strong he almost snatched them right there.
The crafty inventor saw the look in his eye. As Chrno picked them up, the Elder spoke. "You remember the devil that attacked here and used the Spirit bullet Rosette had lost to make itself more powerful? Well, it got me thinking. I figured that if Spirit had that kind of effect on a devil with its horns intact, what would it do it to you? So then I came up with these." Taking the Horns from Chrno, he turned them upside-down so that they were looking at their bases. The Horns were mounted on magnetic plates, so as to attach to the metal plates covering the places where his original Horns had been so as not to require them to be surgically placed into his skull. In the middle of each base was a hole, about the diameter of a dime.
The Elder reached into his lab coat's side pocket and pulled out a small silver object. He held it up to catch the light, and Chrno saw it to be a bullet, the kind that the Magdalene Order used. He turned it over and inserted it headfirst into the hole and pushed a small knob on the side of the base, closing the hole, saying, "If it wasn't for these, all the Horns would be good for are decorations." Instantly a soft humming could be heard. The Elder proceeded to do the same to the other Horn, saying, "As you know, devil Horns are designed to gather Astral energy and feed it directly into the devils body. However, since these horns attach to a secondary surface rather than underneath your skin, they need to have their own power sources. Since the Spirit bullets are made up of small puffs of Astral energy and spells, they are act as a kind of Astral battery, powering up the Horns for short bursts of time. Once the energy has been used up, the bullet disintegrates and you can pull off the Horns to put in more bullets. I wouldn't put in more than one bullet in each horn at a time, and even under strenuous circumstances more than two at a time in each." He held them out to Chrno. "Go ahead my boy, try them on!" he urged.
Chrno took them, feeling the warm, reassuring weights in his hands. Now that he had gotten over the initial shock, he studied them and saw them to be works of art- where his original Horns had merely been shards of bone sticking straight back from his skull behind the ears, these were truly elegant: small spirals curving up, around and outwards like a ram's horns, streaked with silver runes and designs. He looked up at his audience. Sister Kate too had calmed down and was staring at him, as if realizing the very things that repulsed her may be the only way to get Rosette back. Minister Remington did not look so convinced, and scowled disapprovingly at the Horns and the one holding them, recalling an old memory about what happened the last time Chrno had been in possession of his Horns. And the Elder merely sat there, waiting patiently.
Chrno raised the Horns to the sides of his head, feeling the powerful magnets latch onto the metal coverings of the gaping holes from where his old Horns had been, wincing as they came down on his head, one after another, crash, crash.
He instantly felt different. Stronger. Not for sixty years had he felt this good. He bet if he really tried, he could move mountains. He heard applauding from behind him. He turned, and standing there in the threshold of the small curtained-off area stood Mary, Anna and Claire, clapping as though they had just seen a Broadway performance.
"Oh Chrno," Claire sighed, "They really look nice on you!"
"Yeah," Mary chimed in. She seemed lost for anything else and was staring at Chrno's head.
"I bet they make you strong as an ox!" Anna gushed, flexing her own muscles to demonstrate.
"Er, thanks…" Chrno said awkwardly. Fortunately, he didn't get the chance to say anything else, as a certain lecherous old man jumped out of his bed squealing, "Oh goody! They sent my medicine, and in six lovely large jugs!"
As the girls ran off and Remington stopped the Elder from going outside the curtain by grabbing him by the shoulders and flinging him bodily back on to the bed, Chrno heaved a sigh of relief and mouthed the words, "Thank you," silently to him. The old man responded with a wink. Or at least the approximation of one; it was hard to tell because of the goggles.
He flopped back on the pillow saying, "I'm tired now. Thank you all for coming to visit me." He grinned. "Maybe after my nap you could send in those three darling girls that were just here to give me my sponge bath?" Sister Kate stormed out of the room in disgust. Remington turned to go, then stopped. Chrno was staring off into space, as if making a difficult decision. He looked up and saw the priest staring at him and smiled reassuringly. "Go on, I'll be out there in a second." Realizing this was about as much of an answer as he was going to get, he nodded and followed Sister Kate's path, albeit much more calmly.
"One thing, Chrno-" the weapons maker said to him, straightening up in the bed as Chrno moved to fluff the old man's pillows, "There aren't enough Spirit bullets to keep you powered up for long. There's only the two that I already put in the Horns- and they're from the original batch of three that I made. So you'll have to wait until I can get out of this infernal prison they've got me in to manufacture more."
Chrno started. "How long until they release you?" This was unexpected. What would happen to Rosette while Chrno was sitting around here twiddling his thumbs, waiting for the Elder to recuperate to make more Spirit batteries?
Before the Elder could reply he was interrupted by the head nurse who came storming in. "What's this about my infirmary being an 'infernal prison?'" she asked lividly, pushing up the sleeves of her uniform in the universal sign she was spoiling for a fight. Fifty-ish, she was broad and bulky- not in fat, but bulky all the same. She looked like she'd be more at home playing rugby than tenderly attending the sick and wounded. Chrno took it as his cue to leave, the high pitched protests and squeals from the Elder ringing in his ears as he hurried out.
Chrno stood in the courtyard a half-hour later, the Locator under his arm. He had decided. He would do Rosette no good if he stayed here, while she was in mortal peril with some stranger. Chrno gritted his teeth. When he saw this guy, he was going to give him a piece of his mind. Or take a bit of the other guy's- he wasn't sure which yet.
The yellow ribbon was tied to the handle of the Locator, and as such the wind played with his freed purple tresses, flinging them all over the place. He breathed in deep and tucked the device in the knapsack he had borrowed from the Elder's lab. He had traversed the Gate once before- when he and the other Sinners made it to Earth. Even though it was sixty years since that time, he still remembered how to activate the Gate. It was so simple it was frightening.
He removed an extra pistol he had hidden in his inner coat pocket. It had one Holy bullet in it, which was all the devil needed. Raising his arm to put the gun at his temple, he took another deep breath, held the image of Rosette firmly in his mind,
And pulled the trigger.
