Chapter Four

Beating Heart

Koharu's eyes graced over the floor, distant from her ideal attention. She stared off into space during Kakashi's teaching. Each day she found her attention slipping farther from her studies. It was difficult to bare. Having to learn from Kakashi, having to watch him though he was teaching. All she could think about was how she was looking at forbidden love. Looking at a love that never could be accepted in this world. Though the system could put her heart on hold, they could never have the power to stop this feeling all together.

Since then a new semester of school had started and classes had changed, but surprisingly Koharu still had Kakashi's class. "I think Koharu-Chan's got a crush on the teacher..." One of the girls in Koharu's new class teased as the waited for class to start.

"I do not!" Koharu called out, feeling discovered, yet she wasn't lying, she didn't have a crush, it was true love.

"Then why are you always blushing when he's around!"

Koharu felt like sweating buckets. "Leave her alone! You know good and well that we all have a crush on Kakashi sensei!" A young girl about Koharu's age walked behind her and patted her on the back, clueing she was on her side.

"I do hate to deter the conversation topic from this..." the class all jumped in surprise to see Kakashi looking at them all with a tolerant smile. "But we have an assignment to do." He handed out an assignment sheet and walked to the back and sat at his desk, doing some marking.

The other girls went back to their seats. The tall, long, black-haired, green-eyed girl sat beside Koharu. "It's ok, these girls are just upset because of competition." She smiled and laughed. "I'm Seiji Hanayuru, what's yours?"

Koharu took a deep breath, "I'm Koharu Takahashi."

"Well Koharu, I hope you and I can be good friends."

After class Seiji left, as well as the rest of the class after they prepared their things. Koharu collected her belongings and headed out the door. "Koharu!" Kakashi stopped her. "Are you ok? I mean are you getting along well?"

"Actually, yes. I thought it would be just like last semester but its different, the people are different." Koharu smiled contently.

"That's good to hear...I didn't want. I didn't want you not to be able to fit in because of me. I feel the one to blame for everything that has happened to you is me."

"Oh, never sensei! I could never blame you for this. It's my fault...for asking this of you in the first place. For having this feeling, and feeling that it needed to be supplied." Koharu looked down at the ground and blushed. The two continued to talk not noticing Seiji was walking back behind the corner after forgetting to bring his book. He noticed Koharu and Kakashi talking, but shyly disappeared behind the door until they were finish.

In the early hours of the morning, Koharu quietly wandered the house and grounds, seeking respite from her restless tossing and turning. Although insomnia was a familiar companion to her, she'd found it to be an even more frequent visitor of late; slumber always long in coming, and prone to nightmares when it arrived. Tilting her head back and rocking it gently from side to side, she tried to release the tension in her neck and shoulders. The cause of her unrest was hardly a mystery: with the exams only a few days away, anxiety had settled in the pit of her stomach, worrying at her every waking moment. Lost in thought, Koharu's unwitting footsteps led her directly to the source of her confusion, her brown eyes darkening with chagrin when she found herself standing outside her door. She opened the door in a reaction to hearing it ring. Her eyes faltered once she realized it was Seiji at her door.

"Hi Koharu!" He waved friendly at her. "Since exams are next week, I thought we could stuff together. What do you say?"

Koharu hesitated to answer, she looked around the round shyly. Her parents had left for work early this Saturday morning and she was home alone. "I don't think it would be a good idea."

"Come on Koharu...please! You know how bad I am at testing." He bagged his head with his fist and laughed, "plus, your parents know me. We have been in the same class for a whole month!" He fidgeted at the door, waiting for her to say yes.

"But you have to leave before they come home. Ok!" Koharu slightly opened the door more and showed him in.

"When will they be back?"

Koharu shrugged placing her books at the table they would be sitting at. She explained a couple of compleciated problems to him for the past two hours. But the more time progressed they found themselves falling off subject. "Ok Seiji, you see this? All you have to do is rearange its position and..." Koharu pointed to the problem.

"Uh...Koharu?" Seiji spoke nervously as she stopped explaining.

"Yeah...what is it?"

"That day we met...how do you really feel about Kakashi sensei? Do you really like him?" Seiji whittled with his pencial and thenstared at her.

Koharu blushed shyly, "what brings up this topic?"

"After class...I saw you talking to him. You seem more familiar with him...more than a teacher and student relationship." He blushed and looked down.

"Seiji." Koharu blushed, trying to figure a way to explain herself.

"Oh, just forget it. It's stupid, you aren't that type of girl." He quickly changed the subject laughing loudly. Koharu felt still unease because he drew that conclusion in the first place.

"How about I go get us some snacks?" Koharu rushed to her feet and left for the kitchen, closing the door behind her. She took at least twenty minutes searching for the least bite of food. When she returned the room was quiet.

The faint light of a flickering candle shone softly through the thin panel, evidence that perhaps Seiji wasn't as comfortable with the idea of exams as she believed. Hesitating, finding her heart suddenly beating nervously in her throat, the girl eased the door quietly open, murmuring his name solicitously. At the sight of him sleeping peacefully -- body folded beside the table in the center of the room, his head cradled on the curve of his arm -- she sighed slowly and deliberately, relieved beyond words to find him untouched by the fears besetting her.

His back and knees will be sore in that way, she thought, smiling fondly at his awkward position. Moving close, she bent to lift him into his arms, intent on tucking him into a blanket on the couch. As his weight shifted to rest against her chest, his hand relaxed its grip on his pencil, letting it clatter dully against the tabletop. Stilling as the small motion drew her gaze to the characters scrawled with such care over the paper scattered around them, Koharu could but stare, torn between laughter and some other, nameless emotion. Seiji, in the time of her being gone, he had marked his paper with the words, 'Seiji' and 'Koharu'.