Disclaimer: I threw the disclaimer over a cliff, along with all the plot bunnies. Does it really look like I care about them? ; )

A/N: Ha! And the long, long review responses are back! Hit fastforward now if you like your sanity as it is.

wildcardrose, Leishy, stryfechild, Sagistar, Ning Ning, Wishful Thinking2, Madison-Writer, Personage, Jane34, Kitsu Lebeau, TheBabyPhatPrincess - Group hug! Thanks so much, guys! Every single review is appreciated! I'm shameless; I'd even settle for a blank review, as long as the counter went up. But a few words are all that much better! ; )

Rogue4787, ladychopsticks, Mag Carter - Gold stars for you! It was Madness... that got updated last time! You guys got crystal balls up your sleeves or something?

TheDmntdFerret - I've seen the site and it's coming along great! I'm honored that you're archiving Hazard there! Can't wait to see the finished product.

ishandahalf - I've missed responding to your craziness the most! Let's see if I can plow through this with my insanity intact... I don't have any Remy teddy bears to give away, but would you settle for a nice fluffy plot bunny instead?... Hmm, choose between college and Remy LeBeau in your bed? I'm guessing YOU would choose Remy any day of the week and twice on Sunday? ; ) ... Trillions of gold stars? Coolness! I can make my own galaxy now! ; )

T. - Hi! Nice to see another familiar face - err... name around. Good point too!

Tammy - Thanks for being persistant and leaving a review even though the site was giving you problems! Bet you it was the bunnies gnawing on the cables or something... I promise I'll try to touch on how Rogue and Remy got together a little more - as soon as I figure it out for myself!

Mythical Blue - A little shameless begging never hurt. ; ) Thanks for giving your take on the chapter. It really helps if I can "see" what the reader sees. That way I know I'm not screwing up too badly!

Roguechere, Slim Sheady, Gertrude-04 - Thanks for the kind words! And for taking the time to review! Much appreciated!

Eileen Blazer - Why're you all acting like it's such a big surprise that I've updated? Just because it was an entire year since last time... ; ) Hey, nice to see you again! I've been backtracking on your We've Met Before fic, so expect a review when I'm finally done. But it might be a while because it's hard to play catch-up! ; ) ... You like it when Rogue and Remy fight, huh? If you want I can have them doing that all day for you. We just have to consult the bunnies. ; ) ... Hmm, Remy posing nude for another girl? Can I volunteer to be the girl? ; )

marie - Ummm... yes? It was my devious plan all along to make you go back and read the entire story. But I protest! The bunnies, muse and disclaimer put me up to it! I'm innocent, I tell you! Call off the flying monkeys!

SLH - Not a bad idea! Think Remy's that dramatic? We all know he's that conniving; he just might resort to something like that to get what he wants... Btw, love the fact that you're updating left and right lately!

CHAPTER 7
Sundaes and Surprises

That no-good, scum-suckin', swamp-breathin'... swamp rat! Rogue fumed as she made her way down to the kitchen. How dare he order me around like Ah'm some scullery maid without a lick o' sense in mah own head! With a violent shove, she pushed open the swinging door that stood in her way, before stomping over to the refrigerator.

She was still seething with anger as she gulped down a tall glass of orange juice. She let the liquid run its course down to her stomach before taking a deep breath in an attempt to calm herself. Picking up her glass and the juice jug, she turned to the kitchen table in the middle of the room.

Ah swear ta heaven, Ah would rip that boy's heart in -

She stopped in mid-thought when her eyes settled on the young man half-crouched behind the door.

"Rogue."

"There a reason yoah sneakin' 'round our house at eight o'clock in th' mornin', Bobby?"

He straightened, bringing himself to his full height. "Uh... free food?"

Placing the jug on the table and pushing it in his direction, she turned back to the cabinet to get him a glass. "Freeloader," she quipped. It was only when they had both settled at the table that she noticed the light speckling of blood on his face. "What happened to you?"

"Oh, I don't know..." he replied flippantly. "Think a bus going a hundred miles an hour just came rushing through here, and I just happened to be standing behind the door at the time."

Rogue's expression fell. "Ah did that? Damn, Bobby, Ah'm sorry. You want me ta get you some ice or somethin'?"

"Ha, ha. Very funny."

She smiled. "Yeah, it is." She reached behind her and opened a nearby drawer, extracting a small plastic bag. Holding it open for him, she watched as he used his powers to fill it with neat little ice cubes. "Hey, we should think about throwin' ourselves ice parties like we used ta do back in high school. You remember?"

"'Cause I do. We almost got into a shitload of trouble when we were filling the football team's jockstraps with shaved ice. Now there was a pre-game surprise I bet they weren't expecting."

"Yeah, that was a good one!" She laughed. "Ah can still remember all o' 'em walkin' onta th' field with those wet patches right on th' front o' their pants! Ha! That was priceless!"

"Good thing we got it on video, huh?"

"It's too bad we didn' get th' chance ta blackmail 'em like we were plannin' to."

"Yeah, well... maybe on our ten-year reunion or something." Bobby adjusted the plastic bag pressed against his bruised nose. "So you wanna talk about whatever's bothering you?"

Her eyes shot up to his. "What're you talkin' 'bout, Bobby?"

Instead of answering her, he stood up and made his way to the refrigerator. Reaching into the freezer, he pulled out a gallon container of ice cream.

"Yoah makin' a sundae at eight o'clock in th' mornin'?"

"And your point would be?" He also came up with chocolate and strawberry syrup, and a small jar of chopped nuts for toppings. "I still stand by my belief that there is absolutely no scientific proof that it's bad to eat sweets in the morning. I've been doing it for years and look how great I turned out."

"Ah wouldn't use that as yoah main sellin' point if Ah were you, sugah."

"Your support is overwhelming," he commented dryly. "Remind me to put an ad in the paper for a new best friend... Here," he slid one of the already-filled ice cream dishes toward her, "make yourself useful and start topping."

After several moments of silence, Rogue asked, "So how's th' love life comin' along?"

"No."

"No what?"

"No, we're not going to talk about my personal stuff if you're not going to talk about your personal stuff."

"You know, you were a lot less control-y in high school."

"No, you were a lot more bossy."

"Ah thought we agreed ta call it bein' 'strong-willed.'"

"Or pig-headed."

"Oh, now yoah jus' bein' nasty." She grinned. She missed spending time with Bobby. There hadn't been many opportunities to hang out together since they both started college. The only time they saw each another was at Logan's bar, and that was only on the rare occasion that both of them were present. "Feels kind o' funny, doesn't it?"

"What does?" he asked, digging into his chocolate sundae with as much enthusiasm as a four-year-old.

"Not hangin' out an' seein' each other ev'ry day. It's kind o' weird, you know?"

Bobby smirked. "It's only been a couple of years since high school. You're making us sound like a bunch of geriatric patients already. 'Sides," he said, looking at her in all seriousness, "I offered to become a permanent houseguest in that apartment of yours. You cruelly turned me down... eight times."

She pelted him with a miniscule chunk of chopped nut. "It's physically impossible fo' you ta be serious, ain't it?"

"Probably." He grinned.

"An' what is yoah major again?"

"Accountancy."

"Oh yeah, yoah future bosses are goin' ta love you."

"'Course they will! Who else is gonna brightened up their day, bring fun and laughter into the stuck-up corporate world - "

" - put ice into their hot coffee, leave whoopee cushions on their desk chairs, freeze their hair until it's brittle enough to break off into pieces..."

"Hey, I did that once. And the outcome was very stylish." It took a couple of moments, but Bobby was happy to see the smile tugging at the corners of his best friend's lips. It was a nice change from the seething anger that had been radiating off of her when she first stormed into the room. "So... you wanna talk now?"

Rogue sighed. "What makes you think there's somethin' Ah need ta talk about?"

"You mean, besides the fact that you almost took my head off when you came into the kitchen?"

She looked up and met his eyes. There was nothing but genuine concern lurking behind those baby blues. Bobby had been her closest friend for a long time. She knew she could trust him with her life, if it ever came to that. But it felt strange to share her relationship with Remy with anyone else but Remy. As if talking about it with anyone else would make it less special... less magical.

And then there was Logan. As much as she loved her brother, as much as she respected him, and trusted him, she knew he would never approve of Remy... not for her, at least. Remy had a reputation of being a notorious player. The love-'em-an'-leave-'em type; the ultimate lady's man, leaving broken hearts and lacy unmentionables in his wake. Sure, Logan could trust him with helping to run the bar, setting up the fights, and keeping an ear out for "insider" information. But he would never, ever leave his baby sister in the Cajun's hands, not without threat of death and dismemberment by six adamantium claws as a warning if any harm ever came to one hair on her head. She wondered if Remy making love to her every chance they got warranted such a punishment.

Rogue mentally shook her head. The point was that she couldn't risk letting Bobby in on her secret relationship with Remy, no matter how much she wanted to confide in her best friend. The chance that word might find its way back to Logan was not something she could risk, as slim as that possibility might be. The less people that knew about she and Remy, the better.

"There's nothin' wrong, Bobby. Jus' got up on th' wrong side o' th' bed, Ah guess."

He scoffed. "More like got up on the wrong side, fell to the floor with a thud, onto a pile of nails and thumbtacks, and then stepped on shards of broken glass on the way to the bathroom."

"Do you have ta exaggerate like that?"

"Do you have to lie like that?"

Their eyes met over the table, and Bobby knew that there was something she wasn't telling him.

"Ah ain't lyin'."

"Prove it."

She raised an eyebrow at the challenge in his voice. "Yoah kiddin' me, right? You actually want ta..." Her voice trailed off.

"It's always worked before."

"It's never worked before."

"That's what you think." He leaned into the table, his arms resting on the smooth wooden surface. "First one to blink or look away is hiding something."

"Good Lord, really... a starin' contest, Bobby? We ain't in high school anymore, and even then it was a bit immature."

"Never stopped us before. What's the matter... chicken?"

"Oh fo' th' love o' God..." She imitated his stance. "Ah'm only doin' this 'cause Ah've got things Ah gotta do today an' Ah'll be late fo' most o' them if Ah don' leave soon."

"So shut up and start already."

They locked gazes, blue eyes squaring off with green.

"This is ultimately stupid, you know that, don' you, sugah?"

"Stop trying to distract me. You never could fight fair."

"Fight? You call this a fight? Arm wrestlin' would be more o' a fight than this. You didn' suggest that 'cause you know Ah could whip yoah butt with mah eyes closed."

"Arm wrestling wouldn't prove that you're keeping something from me."

"An' this does?"

"Yes."

"How exactly?"

"Because you'll blink first."

"An' that will prove that Ah'm not tellin' you somethin'?"

"Yes."

"Lordy, this is pointless."

"No, it's not."

"C'mon, Bobby! Even though we don' go ta th' same school anymore, yoah still mah best friend! If there was anythin' important goin' on in mah life, Ah would tell you!"

"Then how come you didn't tell me you've been sleeping with Gambit, and that the two of you have been going at it behind all of our backs for the past two years?"

Rogue blinked.

"What?"

- oOo -

"Darlin', what is this?" Logan picked up a plastic package of food from the back of their shopping cart. "'Healthy Pork Rinds'? Did they stop ta think before namin' this stuff?"

"What are you talking about? Those are the kinds you like," Ororo stated serenely, looking over the vegetable display for the best selection of carrots.

He raised an eyebrow to that statement. His name and health food were rarely in the same sentence together - if at all. "Yer not serious, are you?"

Calmly placing a bag of carrots next to the rest of their produce, she conceded, "All right, so they aren't the kind you buy. But they are better for you, Logan."

"So's an alcohol-free liver an' smoke-free lungs, but you don' see me complain' 'bout that."

"Logan."

"Ororo."

She sighed. "You're going to have Jimmy or Frank bring you some of your brand later tonight if I don't back off now, aren't you?"

"More than likely, yeah."

She picked up the offending package and handed it to him. "I was merely thinking of your health."

"An' I 'ppreciate the thought, darlin', but what else am I gon' use this healin' factor for if not ta save me from all this shit?"

"Your logic astounds me," she deadpanned, moving down to the toiletries aisle. "Would you find a bottle of the shampoo Rogue likes?"

"Why? Kid thinks she can live on her own, she can get her own shampoo."

"We are not starting this again."

"What? Her college ain't that far away, neither is her apartment, if you think about it. She could jus' as easily live with us. Save on all kinds o' bills."

"You have been putting up this argument for quite a while now."

"An' still the two o' you ain't listenin' ta me."

Ororo sighed. "She's a grown woman, who is perfectly capable of taking care of herself."

"Yeah, she'd like ta think that."

"Logan, enough. She is no longer a child, and even though you do not like the fact, she has grown up. She has grown up very beautifully, in fact. And there is not a single doubt in my mind that she can handle herself." She marched down the aisle to pluck a shampoo bottle from the shelf. "Now either you realize that now, or I am leaving you here next to the toilet paper." Without another word, she turned on her heel and walked away.

A smile snuck its way onto Logan's lips. Even annoyed she was graceful. He couldn't help but admire the gentle sway of her hips, and the way they seemed to taunt him with each alluring movement.

You are so whipped, bub, he thought to himself as he followed her with their cart. Surprisingly enough, that idea didn't seem to bother him as much as he thought it would.

- oOo -

Remy took another sip of his latté. His left shoulder was beginning to cramp up from leaning against an oak tree for so long. This was taking longer than he estimated. Who would have guessed that an art student would take so long in the library? He'd always thought they would be the type to practice various styles through trial-and-error rather than bookworming through techniques.

It had taken him the better part of two hours to track down Rogue's "friend." She would have killed him of course, if she knew he'd use his underground connections to dig up information on Pete. Or rather Piotr Rasputin. A student from Russia, in his last year of college. Once Remy knew who he was, it didn't take long to hack into the school's registrar and find Piotr's schedule. He had an early class at seven a.m. that morning. That had been dismissed at eight-thirty, and his next class wouldn't start until nine-fifteen. Remy's instincts told him that Piotr would spend the short forty-five-minute break in the campus library, since it was on the way to his next class. He hoped his gamble would pay off.

Movement caught his eye from across the courtyard. A tall, dark-haired young man emerged from the library's double doors. His arms were full of books and a worn backpack was flung across one shoulder. He looked around in a casual manner, taking in the fresh morning light, before descending the steps and turning left.

Lady Luck's still got de hots f'r me, Remy grinned as he watched Piotr make his way toward him. Pushing himself away from his perch, Remy moved onto the sidewalk, pretending to admire the architecture of a nearby building. Just as Piotr was about to pass him, Remy took a step back and...

"Merde!" he said as the impact caused both men to lose their balance. He recovered first, and began gathering up the fallen books. "Pardonnez-moi, mon ami. Didn' see you dere."

"No, no. It was my fault." Piotr straightened and Remy took note of how much taller the other man was. "I should have been more aware of where I was walking."

"Guess we're both a pair o' klutzes, eh, homme?" Remy took a quick look at the books in his hand. Drawing the Human Body. Portraits and Paintings. The Perfect Figure. He frowned inwardly. Piotr was brushing up on his techniques, probably preparing for his afternoon session with Rogue. He handed the books back to Piotr. "You an art buff or somt'in'?" Remy asked, hoping he was the type to engage in a little small talk with a complete stranger.

"An art major, actually. I am in my last year of college."

"Dat's good, mon ami. Congratulations." He plastered on a fake smile. "I couldn't help but notice ya books dere, all about de human form. Gotta say, out o' ev'ryt'in', dose seem de most diff'cult t' me. What wit' makin' sure you've got ev'ryt'in' in proportion, all de proper muscles are visible, an' de face actually looks like a face an' not some cartoon. Hard stuff t' get down."

A slight hint of surprise colored Piotr's expression. "That is true. I, myself, find it quite difficult - thus, the reason for all the books. I have a session after lunch, and I wish to be prepared as much as possible."

Remy felt something in his stomach take a nosedive. A session after lunch. Had Rogue done what he'd asked of her and cancelled her appointment with Piotr? Or did that mean...? "Well, good luck wit' dat. I'm sure you'll do fine. All you need is a patient model who won't move around too much while ya workin'."

"I do not think I will have much trouble there. My friend Rogue was kind enough to volunteer to be my model. It will make everything less awkward for me."

Mon Dieu! "You kidden' me, homme? Ain't it gon' be even more weird lookin' at ya friend like that?" He gave him a sly grin. "Less de lady's more dan a friend..."

"I am sure it will all work out," Piotr returned politely. He nodded to the books he had once again piled in his arms. "Thank you again for your help. Have a nice day." With one last smile, he turned and continued on his way.

"Yeah, you too."

Remy watched him go. If the situation had been any different, he was sure he would actually like Piotr Rasputin. He seemed like a simple enough guy - straight up, a gentleman. However, the problem was as it was, and he did not like the thought of any man seeing his girlfriend naked - no matter how much of a gentleman that man seemed to be.

As he watched Piotr turn a corner, Remy slipped his hand into his pocket and extracted the other man's wallet.

Now how did dat get in dere? He grinned as he began to rummage through it. Let's see... 'bout thirty bucks in change, a few IDs, library card, couple o' old art exhibit tickets, an'... what's dis?

His fingers found a small plastic bag tucked neatly away in one of the side compartments. Still got de receipt in here an' ev'ryt'in', he laughed, checking the date. A fresh purchase from the day before. Turning the bag over, he dumped its contents onto his palm.

Remy stopped.

Two small, shiny, square packets of condoms stared back at him.

Looks like dat homme is de kind o' gentleman I don' particularly like.


I forgot to mention this at the end of the last chapter, but you all remember when Remy recorded Rogue snoring and she didn't believe it was her? Well, that's actually a true story, which happened with me and my boyfriend (You know who I'm talking about, Ish. : ) And to this day, I still protest that it was me! ; )